FW: [gatortalk] RE: [gatornews] [SUN]: 5/26 13:33 --- "THE CHALKBOARD" === UF expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks [Crabbe]

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Jay Cicone

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May 27, 2010, 1:31:09 PM5/27/10
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Keith,

You seem slightly bitter. The following happened to me recently. My wife has been a bit distant since then. I just don't get women?

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.  I asked her, 'Do you know him?'  'Yes,' she sighed, 'He's my old boyfriend...  I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since.'  'My God!' I said, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

...and I thought the menopause was bad...now I know why old guys play golf and go to the gym.


From: gato...@googlegroups.com [mailto:gato...@googlegroups.com] On Behalf Of ke...@baldwinnc.com
Sent: Thursday, May 27, 2010 11:34 AM
To: gato...@googlegroups.com
Subject: RE: [gatortalk] RE: [gatornews] [SUN]: 5/26 13:33 --- "THE CHALKBOARD" === UF expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks [Crabbe]

I wouldn't waste the steak.  I'd cook and eat it while she was out splashing around. 
 
I think that is what sushi and calamari are for. 
 
"Here honey - I brought some nice sushi and calamari for you.  They're best if you eat them out in the ocean.  And this white and black bathing suit makes you look so skinny.  "
 
SHANE - YOU JUST GAVE ME ANOTHER GREAT BUSINESS IDEA !!!
 
Black and white bathing suits that double as chum buckets.  You wait till they fall asleep on the beach, load them up with chum, wake them up and tell them how hot (as in high temperature) they look and that they should go cool off in the ocean. 
 
Keep it a secret or my wife will go have one made for me first. 
 
 
 
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Re: [gatortalk] RE: [gatornews] [SUN]: 5/26 13:33 --- "THE
CHALKBOARD" === UF expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks [Crabbe]
From: Shane Ford <goufg...@bellsouth.net>
Date: Thu, May 27, 2010 11:22 am
To: gato...@googlegroups.com
Aren't you supposed to tie a steak around their ankle to?  :-)

________________________________________
From: "ke...@baldwinnc.com" <ke...@baldwinnc.com>
To: gatortalk googlegroups <Gato...@googlegroups.com>
Sent: Thu, May 27, 2010 10:12:34 AM
Subject: [gatortalk] RE: [gatornews] [SUN]: 5/26 13:33 --- "THE CHALKBOARD" === UF expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks [Crabbe]
 They left out - send your spouse in first, tell them to jump and splash around some before you'll come in.
 
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: [gatornews] [SUN]: 5/26 13:33 --- "THE CHALKBOARD" === UF
expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks [Crabbe]
From: Shane Ford <go.ufg...@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, May 27, 2010 10:18 am
To: gato...@googlegroups.com
 
May 26th, 2010 01:33pm
UF expert provides tips to avoid shark attacks
by Nathan Crabbe     (Gainesville SUN)
 
 
With Memorial Day approaching, University of Florida shark expert George Burgess is trying to prevent swimmers from becoming part of the statistics that he tracks.
Burgess is director of UF's International Shark Attack File, which complies information on attacks. On a video posted on UF's Web site, he provides a few tips to avoid attacks for the thousands of people hitting the beaches over Memorial Day weekend.
He said a few key spots should be avoided: "Area's where there's drop-offs, where there is fishing activity, if there's effluent entry in the water, inlets. Those all are areas of high population density of sharks."
And he said that night swimming is a bad idea: "The time period between dusk and dawn, which is a time period when sharks are very active eating, and in particular the biggest and the largest, the bull and the tiger sharks, seem to be doing their most damage."
Florida has seen its share of shark attacks, including a fatal attack on a surfer earlier this year.
UPDATE: Burgess has just put out a new study that provides detail on the most likely circumstances for a shark attack: Shark attacks are most likely to occur on Sunday, in less than 6 feet of water, during a new moon and involve surfers wearing black and white bathing suits.
 

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