11th March 2009
Jayne Mee
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Today's Jokes
Due to recent budget cuts and the rising
cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions and a few
trillion dollars in bailouts for some corporations, the light at the end of the
tunnel has been turned off.
We apologize for the
inconvenience.
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Sick joke alert
If abortion is murder, then blowjobs are cannibalism and masturbation is mass genocide.
______________________you were warned!______________________
Getting arrested on purpose turned out to be a huge mistake. Those conjugal visits I'd heard about are real -- but you have to already know someone who'll come visit you. The prison doesn't supply them.
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I think, if he could have foreseen all the
fuss and commotion from his actions...
The chicken would have never have
crossed the fucking road
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They have these sex lines on the T.V, and
when you ring them they always say the same thing, "What can i do for you?"
I
simply say, "Call me back its cheaper!"
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I tried to send a document via
telecomunications technology, but it came out all wonky at the other
end.....
I've gotta get my fax straight.
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My parents hated me as a child.
One
Christmas I opened my present to find an empty shoe box.
They told me it
was an action man deserter.
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A flight attendant was stationed at the
departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for
the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a
beat, she said; "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your
stub."
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Love this video - but it MUST have hurt!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueVOLY2SPDE
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My uncle came out of the closet
yesterday.
He's not gay, he's got Alzheimer's and thought it was the
car
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What did Cinderella do when she got to the
ball?
She choked.
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Spending your life waiting for the Messiah to come save the world is like waiting around for the straight piece to come in Tetris. Even if it comes, by that time you've accumulated a mountain of shit so high that you're fucked no matter what you do.
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I used to tell a lot of religious jokes. Not any more: they put me on the sects offenders register
Thanks hh
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Today's jewels!
925 STERLING SILVER
SAPPHIRE & WHITE CZ BRACELET
DBS816
(L)7.5 inches = 18.0 grams
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Great offers on every newsletter - don't miss out!
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http://stores.ebay.co.uk/bee-bop-kids-clothes
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GREEK NEWS
With the song "This is our night" Greek pop singer, Sakis Rouvas, will represent Greece in the 54th Eurovision Song Contest that will take place in Moscow on May 16th. Sakis Rouvas had won third place in the 49th Eurovision Song Contest in 2004, with the song "Shake it".
hmmmmm - looks like Greece isn't going to win again with another similar (dated) disco song this year.
Sakis may be perfect 'eye candy' for the ladies (and some men) but his dated moves and chosen song spoil what the eye enjoys
Pics of Sakis
and more ........
yummy!
The Eurovision song!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r56smIbd8Dw
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Sex Toy Warehouse
http://www.sextoysex.com/sex/start/warning.html?a=gadz
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I became fully aware last night that I've
been spending entirely too
much time with my computer. The first clue was
when I noticed that my
right hand is now permanently cramped into the famous
"Microsoft
Mouse" position. The second hint was a little more tragic. As I
lay in
bed last night looking at my wife, thinking how nice it would be
to
have sex with her, I rested my hand upon her breast and gently
cupped
it (having no choice, since my right hand is now permanently
cramped).
I heard a soft moan, but moments later she relegated me back to
my
side of the bed. Alas, I had double-clicked her nipple
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A word from Jayne
What have I been up to these days ..... well we've just finished carnival time. Next year I'm going to be taking part in the actual parade - I made up a video of a few photos
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T51jRb8OM3g
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Today's pictures and cartoons!
Have a great day!
Gadzooks!
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