Hello again! 12th Sept 2007
JAYNE MEE
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Today's Jokes
Fans of '60's music, my 14-year-old daughter and her best friend got front-row tickets to a Peter, Paul, and Mary concert. When they returned home, my daughter said, "During the show, we looked back an saw hundreds of little lights swaying to the music. At first we thought people were holding up cigarette lighters. Then we realized that the lights were the reflections off all the eyeglasses in the audience.
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the chicken of despair."
---Mr. Garrison, South Park.
"Here is a very odd story. A woman in Tennessee is now suing a
local pharmacy after buying what she thought were birth control
patches. They turned out to be nicotine patches. The good news,
her new baby is now down to a half a pack a day."--Jay Leno
My husband seems to feel one should get their money's worth on
vacation. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to frolic every minute
or not. But once when I was sitting in a beach chair on the sand,
he came out of the surf and said, "This is costing us $300 a day -
and you sit there reading a book!"
"This weekend marked the 86th anniversary of the invention of
the bowling shirt. Cause prior to this, people in Cleveland had
nothing to wear to weddings." -Jay Leno
"In a recent interview, Brad Pitt said he and Angelina Jolie would
like to have another baby. Angelina denied the story and said,
'Brad must have misunderstood when I said I was in the mood for
Chinese.'" -Conan O'Brien"It was stupid hot this weekend. This morning
Schwarzenegger announced an emergency statewide wet T-shirt
contest." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Anybody go back to school today? It's tough. I had to take my
son back to school today and I walked through the door and the
teacher there says, 'It's so nice to see the grand- parents
involved.'" -David Letterman
"In Mississippi, a Taco Bell restaurant had to close after employees
found a snake in the restaurant. Witnesses at the Taco Bell said it
was the first time they've ever seen a snake with diarrhea." -Conan
O'Brien
"Fred Thompson officially announced his candidacy for president
today. Here's why Fred Thompson is not going to be our president:
America's not going to pick a first lady that looks like she runs
a tanning salon." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Britney Spears was in the news again. She was having difficulty
starting her car outside a nightclub while in a valet line. The
main problem is, you can't start a car with a Cheeto." -Jimmy Kimmel
"There is a law waiting approval in the California legislature
to ban spanking. The ironic part ? if put into place the fine for
spanking will be a slap on the wrist."-Jay Leno
"World Cup soccer fans in Germany are estimated at drinking 17
pints of beer per day. Apparently after 17 beers soccer becomes
interesting. " -Conan O'Brien
Therefore, in the last three and a half years, I have had a chocolate caloric intake of about 180 pounds. I only weigh 165 pounds, so without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about three months ago. I owe my life to chocolate!
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Today's link
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Today's jewels!
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http://stores.ebay.co.uk/bee-bop-kids-clothes
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Jayne's Useless Gif
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LINKS
Adult Jokes
http://www.jokeworm.com/jokes2
Hunks
http://www.jokeworm.com/newhunks/
Babes
http://www.jokeworm.com/newbabes/
Adult Funny Pics
http://www.jokeworm.com/newpics/
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GREEK NEWS
Civil engineers touring the fire-ravaged villages of the Peloponnese have advised against demolishing the stone structures of the damaged homes, saying they should be rebuilt in the traditional style.
Following an inspection of the worst-hit municipalities, including those of Zacharo, Andritsaina, Ancient Olympia and Pirgos, experts from the National Technical University of Athens said the traditional stone structures were extremely fire-resistent and a good model for engineers rebuilding the damaged villages.
“With the old stone houses, even if their roofs had collapsed, their stone structure was essentially untouched,” the group’s leader, Elisavet Vitzilaiou, told Kathimerini. In several cases, aluminium and glass surfaces had melted, showing that stone can withstand temperatures of up to 750 Celsius (1,382 Fahrenheit), Vitzilaiou said.
Apart from its practical characteristics, the stone is also a traditional feature that should be preserved, experts believe. “Even if they are not listed buildings, it is worth repairing them in a way that does not alter the appearance of the settlements,” said Vitzilaiou, who also advised against “barging in like a bull in a china shop and destroying everything.”
Newer-style homes of concrete and wood that were destroyed in the fires can also be rebuilt with stone so that they are more resilient and blend with the other more traditional homes, experts said.
The group, which aims to draft a construction guide for the engineers that will rebuild the villages, is to visit fire-ravaged parts of Evia in the next few days.
From their exchanges with villagers so far, the visiting engineers said they were impressed by the locals’ determination to stay and rebuild their lives rather than relocating.
“They are gradually clearing up the remnants of their burnt homes, some have put up temporary covers where their roofs used to be – it is very encouraging that these people are determined to stay in their villages,” explained Vitzilaiou
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20 Strange Coincidences -
but true
1. James Dean's car curse
In September 1955, James Dean
was killed in a horrific car accident whilst he was driving his Porsche sports
car. After the crash the car was seen as very unlucky.
a) When the car was
towed away from accident scene and taken to a garage, the engine slipped out and
fell onto a mechanic, shattering both of his legs.
b) Eventually the engine
was bought by a doctor, who put it into his racing car and was killed shortly
afterwards, during a race. Another racing driver, in the same race, was killed
in his car, which had James Dean's driveshaft fitted to it.
c) When James
Dean's Porsche was later repaired, the garage it was in was destroyed by fire.
d) Later the car was displayed in Sacramento, but it fell off it's mount and
broke a teenager's hip.
e) In Oregon, the trailer that the car was mounted
on slipped from it's towbar and smashed through the front of a shop.
f)
Finally, in 1959, the car mysteriously broke into 11 pieces while it was sitting
on steel supports.
2. A falling
baby, saved twice by the same man
In Detroit sometime in the 1930s, a
young (if incredibly careless) mother must have been eternally grateful to a man
named Joseph Figlock. As Figlock was walking down the street, the mother's baby
fell from a high window onto Figlock. The baby's fall was broken and both man
and baby were unharmed. A stroke of luck on its own, but a year later, the very
same baby fell from the very same window onto poor, unsuspecting Joseph Figlock
as he was again passing beneath. And again, they both survived the event.
(Source: Mysteries of the Unexplained)
3. A bullet that reached its
destiny years later
Henry Ziegland thought he had dodged fate. In 1883,
he broke off a relationship with his girlfriend who, out of distress, committed
suicide. The girl's brother was so enraged that he hunted down Ziegland and shot
him. The brother, believing he had killed Ziegland, then turned his gun on
himself and took his own life. But Ziegland had not been killed. The bullet, in
fact, had only grazed his face and then lodged in a tree. Ziegland surely
thought himself a lucky man. Some years later, however, Ziegland decided to cut
down the large tree, which still had the bullet in it. The task seemed so
formidable that he decided to blow it up with a few sticks of dynamite. The
explosion propelled the bullet into Ziegland's head, killing him. (Source:
Ripley's Believe It or Not!)
4. Twin Boys, twin lives
The
stories of identical twins' nearly identical lives are often astonishing, but
perhaps none more so than those of identical twins born in Ohio. The twin boys
were separated at birth, being adopted by different families. Unknown to each
other, both families named the boys James. And here the coincidences just begin.
Both James grew up not even knowing of the other, yet both sought
law-enforcement training, both had abilities in mechanical drawing and
carpentry, and each had married women named Linda. They both had sons whom one
named James Alan and the other named James Allan. The twin brothers also
divorced their wives and married other women - both named Betty. And they both
owned dogs which they named Toy. Forty years after their childhood separation,
the two men were reunited to share their amazingly similar lives. (Source:
Reader's Digest, January 1980)
5. Just like Edgar Allan Poe's book
In the 19th century, the famous horror writer, Egdar Allan Poe, wrote a
book called 'The narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym'. It was about four survivors of
a shipwreck who were in an open boat for many days before they decided to kill
and eat the cabin boy whose name was Richard Parker. Some years later, in 1884,
the yawl, Mignonette, foundered, with only four survivors, who were in an open
boat for many days. Eventully the three senior members of the crew, killed and
ate the cabin boy. The name of the cabin boy was Richard Parker.
6.
Twin brothers, killed on the same road, two hours apart
On 2002,
Seventy-year-old twin brothers have died within hours of one another after
separate accidents on the same road in northern Finland. The first of the twins
died when he was hit by a lorry while riding his bike in Raahe, 600 kilometres
north of the capital, Helsinki. He died just 1.5km from the spot where his
brother was killed. "This is simply a historic coincidence. Although the road is
a busy one, accidents don't occur every day," police officer Marja-Leena Huhtala
told Reuters. "It made my hair stand on end when I heard the two were brothers,
and identical twins at that. It came to mind that perhaps someone from upstairs
had a say in this," she said. (Source: BBC News)
7. Three suicide attempts, all stopped by the same Monk
Joseph Aigner was a fairlly well-known portrait painter in 19th century
Austria who, apparently, was quite an unhappy fellow: he several times attempted
suicide. His first attempt was at the young age of 18 when he tried to hang
himself, but was interrupted by the mysterious appearance of a Capuchin monk. At
age 22 he again tried to hang himself, but was again saved from the act by the
very same monk. Eight years later, his death was ordained by others who
sentenced him to the gallows for his political activities. Once again, his life
was saved by the intervention of the same monk. At age 68, Aiger finally
succeeded in suicide, a pistol doing the trick. His funeral ceremony was
conducted by the same Capuchin monk - a man whose name Aiger never even knew.
(Source: Ripley's Giant Book of Believe It or Not!)
8. Poker
winnings, to the unsuspected son
In 1858, Robert Fallon was shot dead,
an act of vengeance by those with whom he was playing poker. Fallon, they
claimed, had won the $600 pot through cheating. With Fallon's seat empty and
none of the other players willing to take the now-unlucky $600, they found a new
player to take Fallon's place and staked him with the dead man's $600. By the
time the police had arrived to investigate the killing, the new player had
turned the $600 into $2,200 in winnings. The police demanded the original $600
to pass on to Fallon's next of kin - only to discover that the new player turned
out to be Fallon's son, who had not seen his father in seven years! (Source:
Ripley's Giant Book of Believe It or Not!)
9. A novel that
unsuspectedly described the spy next door
When Norman Mailer began his
novel Barbary Shore, there was no plan to have a Russian spy as a character. As
he worked on it, he introduced a Russian spy in the U.S. as a minor character.
As the work progressed, the spy became the dominant character in the novel.
After the novel was completed, the U.S. Immigration Service arrested a man who
lived just one floor above Mailer in the same apartment building. He was Colonel
Rudolf Abel, alleged to be the top Russian spy working in the U.S. at that time.
(Source: Science Digest)
10.
Mark Twain and Halley's Comet
Mark Twain was born on the day of the
appearance of Halley's Comet in 1835, and died on the day of its next appearance
in 1910. He himself predicted this in 1909, when he said: "I came in with
Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out
with it."
11. Three strangers on a Train, with complementary last
names
In the 1920s, three Englishman were traveling separately by train
through Peru. At the time of their introduction, they were the only three men in
the railroad car. Their introductions were more surprising than they could have
imagined. One man's last name was Bingham, and the second man's last name was
Powell. The third man announced that his last name was Bingham-Powell. None were
related in any way. (Source: Mysteries of the Unexplained)
12. Two brothers killed by the
same taxi driver, one year apart
In 1975, while riding a moped in
Bermuda, a man was accidentally struck and killed by a taxi. One year later,
this man's bother was killed in the very same way. In fact, he was riding the
very same moped. And to stretch the odds even further, he was struck by the very
same taxi driven by the same driver - and even carrying the very same passenger!
(Source: Phenomena: A Book of Wonders, John Michell and Robert J. M. Rickard)
13. Swapped Hotel Findings
In 1953, television reporter Irv
Kupcinet was in London to cover the coronation of Ellizabeth II. In one of the
drawers in his room at the Savoy he found found some items that, by their
identification, belonged to a man named Harry Hannin. Coincidentally, Harry
Hannin - a basketball star with the famed Harlem Globetrotters - was a good
friend of Kupcinet's. But the story has yet another twist. Just two days later,
and before he could tell Hannin of his lucky discovery, Kupcinet received a
letter from Hannin. In the letter, Hannin told Kucinet that while staying at the
Hotel Meurice in Paris, he found in a drawer a tie - with Kupcinet's name on it!
(Source: Mysteries of the Unexplained)
14. Two Mr. Brysons, same
hotel room
While on a business trip sometime in the late 1950s, Mr.
George D. Bryson stopped and registered at the Brown Hotel in Louisville,
Kentucky. After signing the register and being given his key to room 307, he
stopped by the mail desk to see if any letters had arrived for him. Indeed there
was a letter, the mail girl told him, and handed him an envelope addressed to
Mr. George D. Bryson, room 307. This wouldn't be so odd, except the letter was
not for him, but for room 307's just-previous occupant - another man named
George D. Bryson. (Source: Incredible Coincidence, Alan Vaughan)
15. Twins brothers, same heart
attack
John and Arthur Mowforth were twins who lived about 80 miles
apart in Great Britain. On the evening of May 22, 1975, both fell severely ill
from chest pains. The families of both men were completely unaware of the
other's illness. Both men were rushed to separate hospitals at approximately the
same time. And both died of heart attacks shortly after arrival. (Source:
Chronogenetics: The Inheretance of Biological Time, Luigi Gedda and Gianni
Brenci)
16. A novel that
predicted the Titanic's destiny, and another ship that almost followed
Morgan Robertson, in 1898, wrote "Futility". It described the maiden
voyage of a transatlantic luxury liner named the Titan. Although it was touted
as being unsinkable, it strikes an iceberg and sinks with much loss of life. In
1912 the Titanic, a transatlantic luxury liner widely touted as unsinkable
strikes an iceberg and sinks with great loss of life on her maiden voyage. In
the Book, the Month of the Wreck was April, same as in the real event. There
were 3,000 passengers on the book; in reality, 2,207. In the Book, there were 24
Lifeboats; in reality, 20.
Months after the Titanic sank, a tramp steamer
was traveling through the foggy Atlantic with only a young boy on watch. It came
into his head that it had been thereabouts that the Titanic had sunk, and he was
suddenly terrified by the thought of the name of his ship - the Titanian.
Panic-stricken, he sounded the warning. The ship stopped, just in time: a huge
iceberg loomed out of the fog directly in their path. The Titanian was saved.
17. A writer, found the book of her childhood
While American
novelist Anne Parrish was browsing bookstores in Paris in the 1920s, she came
upon a book that was one of her childhood favorites - Jack Frost and Other
Stories. She picked up the old book and showed it to her husband, telling him of
the book she fondly remembered as a child. Her husband took the book, opened it,
and on the flyleaf found the inscription: "Anne Parrish, 209 N. Weber Street,
Colorado Springs." It was Anne's very own book. (Source: While Rome Burns,
Alexander Wollcott)
18. A writer's plum pudding
In 1805,
French writer Émile Deschamps was treated to some plum pudding by the stranger
Monsieur de Fortgibu. Ten years later, he encountered plum pudding on the menu
of a Paris restaurant, and wanted to order some, but the waiter told him the
last dish had already been served to another customer, who turned out to be de
Fortgibu. Many years later in 1832 Émile Deschamps was at a diner, and was once
again offered plum pudding. He recalled the earlier incident and told his
friends that only de Fortgibu was missing to make the setting complete — and in
the same instant the now senile de Fortgibu entered the room.
19. King Umberto I' double
In Monza, Italy, King Umberto I, went to a small restaurant for dinner,
accompanied by his aide-de-camp, General Emilio Ponzia- Vaglia. When the owner
took King Umberto's order, the King noticed that he and the restaurant owner
were virtual doubles, in face and in build. Both men began discussing the
striking resemblances between each other and found many more similarities.
a) Both men were born on the same day, of the same year, (March 14th, 1844).
b) Both men had been born in the same town.
c) Both men married a woman
with same name, Margherita.
d) The restauranteur opened his restaurant on
the same day that King Umberto was crowned King of Italy.
e) On the 29th
July 1900, King Umberto was informed that the restauranteur had died that day in
a mysterious shooting accident, and as he expressed his regret, he was then
assassinated by an anarchist in the crowd.
20. The 21st, a bad day for King Louis XVI
When King
Louis XVI of France was a child, he was warned by an astrologer to always be on
his guard on the 21st day of each month. Louis ws so terrified by this that he
never did business on this day. Unfortunately Louis was not always on his guard.
On June 21st 1791, following the French revolution, Louis and his queen were
arrested in Varennes, whist trying to escape France. On September 21st 1791,
France abolished the institution of Royalty and proclaimed itself a republic.
Finally on January 21st 1793, King Louis XVI was executed by guillotine.
Thanks James
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A word from Jayne
Here I am again - new computer - new start - new school year!!!
Enjoy!!!!
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Today's pictures and cartoons!
Have a great day!
Gadzooks!
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