Fairly Universal Nonsense for September 17, 2008

[J NA]

There's never enough time to do it right, but there's always enough
time to do it over
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One of my college friends asked a group of us for advice on
organizing his final report for the year. "Why don't you
use Roman numerals to head the different sections?" another
friend suggested.

"I already thought of that," he replied. "But my keyboard
doesn't have Roman numerals on it."
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A church congregation sent out requests to all the professional painters listed in their local Yellow Pages, requesting a bid on a price to repaint their church building. Almost all of the painters were within a few dollars of their competition, as expected, with the exception of one well-known, well-established, local company, which had been in business for years and had an excellent reputation in the community. This particular painter's bid was about half of what his competitions had bid, and naturally, was selected by the congregation to do the job.

On the morning the job began, the painter realized that he had underbid the job by 50%! Not wanting to lose the job, he decided to thin the paint out with water, so he would be able to complete the job for the price quoted.

One week later, he received a call from the priest, explaining that after the first rain, half of the paint had washed off the church. The painter returned, looked at the building, and sure enough, the job was ruined. He went inside to pray about the situation, knowing that his business' reputation was on the line. "What can I possibly do, Lord?" prayed the discouraged businessman.

Suddenly, God, in a loud voice from the altar replied, "Repaint, and thin no more!"
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Mary Ann:  "Honey, what is my love worth to you?"

Basil:  "Am I buying, or selling?"

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