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jesse goss

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Dec 18, 2005, 3:51:13 PM12/18/05

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From: "funnycleanjokes" <funnycl...@yahoo.com>
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Subject: Fun-E-Mail (unknown)
Date: Tue, 13 Dec 2005 12:12:30 -0000

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================================= Fun-E-Mail Tuesday, December 13, 2005 from: http://FunnyCleanJokes.com ================================== 9-11-01 -- We Will Never Forget ================================== ---------------------------------------------------------------- Thought for the Day ---------------------------------------------------------------- Relationships would work better if women would just accept the fact that men are stupid and forgive them for it. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Today's Quickie ---------------------------------------------------------------- My furniture goes back to Louis the 14th. That is, if Louis isn't paid by the 13th. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Celebrity Birthdays ---------------------------------------------------------------- Dick Van Dyke - Actor-comedian - 80 Christopher Plummer - Actor - 78 Robert Prosky - Actor - 75 Buck White - Country singer - 75 Richard Zanuck - Movie producer - 71 John Davidson - Singer - 64 Ted Nugent - Singer - 57 Jeff "Skunk" Baxter - Rock musician - 57 Ron Getman - Country musician - 57 Robert Lindsay - Actor - 56 Randy Owen - Country singer-musician - 56 Wendie Malick - Actress - 55 John Anderson - Country singer - 51 Steve Forbert - Singer-songwriter - 51 Morris Day - Singer-actor - 49 Steve Buscemi - Actor - 48 Johnny Whitaker - Actor - 46 Jamie Foxx - Actor-comedian - 38 Thomas Delonge - Rock singer-musician (Blink 182) - 30 Chelsea Hertford - Actress - 24 <>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<> Dell is your family's best source of computers, printers, TVs and other consumer electronics and accessories. But perhaps the best thing about Dell is that they get service and support right! Save big with this week's limited time offers. ==> http://hsrvr.com/dell <>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<> ---------------------------------------------------------------- Joke of the Day ---------------------------------------------------------------- Snobs Two little s at a very posh school were talking to each other. "I told my driver to take his chauffeur's cap off," said the first girl. "I didn't want the other s here to think I was a snob." "How strange," said the second. "I told mine to keep his on so no one would think he was my father." ---------------------------------------------------------------- A Wandering Mind ---------------------------------------------------------------- Hello! It's the only unscripted TV show we like. The finale of "The Amazing Race" is tonight on CBS. I found this interesting. The upcoming Super Bowl on ABC is so late this time, February 5th, it is less than a week before the Winter Olympics start on NBC. That means a lot of the biggest advertisers are being forced to choose one or the other in which to advertise. A 30 second commercial on the Super Bowl costs about $2.4 million. You can buy almost four Olympic commercials for that price. So -- VISA, McDonald's and others reportedly will not be buying Super Bowl ads. I guess Crazy Bob's Carpet Barn will have to bring us Super Bowl XL (That's Roman numerals for "40," not Extra-Large). See y'all! --Blake Hooper mailto:bl...@funnycleanjokes.com (Blake is our Editor-In-Chief, webmaster & janitor) ---------------------------------------------------------------- From the Archives http://FunnyCleanJokes.com/jokes ---------------------------------------------------------------- Actual Flubbed Headlines --Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says --Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers --Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case --Iraqi Head Seeks Arms --Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over --Include Your Children when Baking Cookies --Clinton Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead --Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told --Miners Refuse to Work after --Juvenile Court to Try Defendant --Stolen Painting Found by Tree --Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years at Checkout Counter --War Dims Hope for Peace --If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While --Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures --Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide --Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges --Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds --Kids Make Nutritious Snacks --Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors --New Vaccine May Contain Rabies --Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge ---------------------------------------------------------------- Quote of the Day ---------------------------------------------------------------- "Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate." --Addison Mizner ---------------------------------------------------------------- Just Wondering ---------------------------------------------------------------- When she wrote my Dear John letter, was it really necessary to dot her "i's" with little hearts? ---------------------------------------------------------------- Feedback ---------------------------------------------------------------- RE: Coach Tony Dungy Isn't it ironic - he apparently wasn't good enough to keep the coaching job in Tampa Bay. His current zero losses record sure calls into question Tampa Bay's ability to evaluate coaches. --Rich in Minnesota USA RE: Old Fogeys Club Just saw Andy Williams in Branson - loved the show. Now if we could resurrect Perry Como and maybe Bing Crosby, Dean Martin, Nat Cole - I could go on and on - being an old fogey might not be so bad. --Mary Ann in Edgerton, Ks. (E-mail us at mailto:feed...@funnycleanjokes.com. Please include your first name and hometown. We do not publish all submissions, and we reserve the right to edit for clarity and brevity.) ---------------------------------------------------------------- Where are you? Sign our GuestMap: http://FunnyCleanJokes.com ---------------------------------------------------------------- We hope you like what we do. With your support, we will continue to use the Internet to spread good, clean, wholesome humor around the world. Fun-E-Mail and FunnyCleanJokes.com are labors of love, but they do require substantial investments in time and money. If you approve of what we do, please help ensure the laughter continues. There are four ways to lend your support: 1) Forward Fun-E-Mail to your friends. 2) Visit our sponsors. 3) Help cover our expenses by contributing a dollar or more at: http://hsrvr.com/paypage 4) Rate our web site at: http://hsrvr.com/rate Thank You! ---------------------------------------------------------------- PRIVACY: Fun-E-Mail from FunnyCleanJokes.com is strictly an opt-in mailing list. Because we respect the privacy of our members, we do not share their e-mail addresses with anyone. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Copyright Š2005 FunnyCleanJokes.com, All Rights Reserved. Subscribers are encouraged to forward this e-mail to their friends. All we ask it that they send the entire message, including sponsor and subscription information. We vigorously oppose "spam." Please do not forward Fun-E-Mail to people you do not know.

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