Points to pomder

[FR JOSE KAIMLETT]

 

 

 

Points to pomder

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have a good laugh!

 

Little Johnny meets new baby

Little Johnny's next door neighbors had recently had a baby. Due to complications, the baby was born without ears. Little Johnny's parents decided to go and see the new baby one day. Johnny's father explained to him about the baby and told Johnny not to make the slightest hint about the baby's ears. Johnny agreed and said that he would be on his best behavior and say nothing about the baby's ears. Johnny and his family went to the baby's house and were invited in by the baby's parents. They went in and sat down and Johnny started to talk to the baby's mother.
"He's a beautiful baby" Johnny said. "He has such pretty eyes. Did the doctor say he could see fine?"
"Yes, he has 20/20 vision" the mother replied.
"Well that's a damn good thing" Johnny said, "because he sure as well can't wear glasses!"

 

 

Seen in Church bulletins or heard during church services

*The Ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind, they can be seen in the church basement Friday afternoon.

*Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24 in the Church. So ends a friendship that began in school days.

*For those you who have children and didn’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

*The Pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, “Break forth into joy.”

*The choir will meet at the Larsen house for fun and sinning.

 

How Do You Get To Heaven?

"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?" 
I asked the children in my Sunday school class.

"NO!" the children all answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into heaven?" Again the answer was, "NO!"

"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children and loved my wife, would that get me into heaven?" I asked them again. 
Once more they all answered, "NO!"

"Well," I continued, thinking they were a good bit more theologically sophisticated than I had given them credit for, "then how can I get into heaven?" 
A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"

 

The pessimist: “It can’t get any worse than this”.

The optimist, brightly: “Oh yes, it can.”

(I love this one)

Am I Crazy?

Mulla Nasruddin’s house was on fire, so he ran up to his roof for safety. There he

was, precariously perched on the roof, when his friends gathered in the street

below holding a stretched out blanket to him and shouting, “Jump, Mullah, jump!”

“Oh no, I won’t,” said the Mullah. “I know you fellows. If I jump, you’ll pull the

blanket away just to make a fool of me!”

“Don’t be silly. Mullah. This isn’t a joke. This is serious. Jump!”

“No,” said Nasruddin. “I don’t trust any of you. Lay that blanket on the ground

and I’ll jump.”