Rex's Passing
Bobbie
always depended on Rex to be MY friend, MY booster, MY cheering squad,
My source of information re my illness, My little candle when MY life
gets scary. I never really thought I had much to offer him, but he
continued to praise me, thank me, remind me of favors I’d done, and
tell how much I meant to him. I thought he was joshing me in a sweet
way so he could continue being MY huge resource of comfort and fun.
This “all about me” business has lots of manifestations and I’m a
walking example.
I've been selfish but Rex always made me feel like he was excited
about any way we could communicate. He said it was I who helped him!
What a way of seeing me. Some kind of special synapse? I don’t know,
but, hey, I’ve taken it and run with it and I know I got the best of
the deal.
It's an odd “transfiguration”---the only word that comes to mind now.
Rex was both the Giver while we spoke of his life and the Giver when
we spoke of mine, and his role of Giver has been something I’ve simply
soaked up and up and up.
I learned of Rex’s death a few days ago from Lai Siong, one of our
Rex Google gang. She, like all of you, is a terrific person (I’ve
been grieving and found out that “meeting” you via the Memorial,
photos, etc. has been a celebration, and I’ve needed these words, you,
& your sharing of Rex’s notes-----thanks).
Rex told me quite a bit about his projects, especially iStories, and,
of course, I wanted/want to help if I can. Like Rex, his projects
were always “right on” and always for the good of others.
So, yes: LIVE FOR OTHERS.
My quick background: I was in Japan from ’84 and left in ’89. I met
Rex when he first arrived in Kyoto and began working at the Y. We
became buds, of course. He was everyone’s favorite: consistent,
giving, hilarious, inventive, and also incredibly “innocent” in many
ways. We laughed so hard, and it was never at him but with him. And,
he was instigating many of the jokes. I also remember serious and
heartfelt conversations we had, talking with him about Kayo, and what
he should do: they were in love; the marriage of Kayo to an American
was a toughie. We talked and talked; I met Kayo and could see just
why he loved her so. And, his love for his daughters and Kayo was
evident in every conversation we had. Yes, and Rikki, too.
I have lots of stories to tell about our shenanigans at the Y (of all
places): our scheming up lesson plans that included him dressing up as
a gorilla and “kidnapping” one of my students right out of class as
part of a “paying attention to details and reporting what happened
project” (it worked!); his being interested in my Folklore classes and
helping me with the filming, etc. But, oh, the dinners at my old and
huge rented traditional house with our friends and students! We had
more fun than imaginable, and I have photos I’ll transfer onto my
digital and make them available to anyone of you who wants them.
Rex and I wrote a lot during the past couple of years, and I think I
have the same great photos you do of the recent times, but, just in
case, I’m happy to share.
Again, I’m grateful to all of you. You have me smiling again. I hope
in some way I might be able to do something for you, and this is no
idle offering. My contact info is here. I am a Californian
(Southern) transported to Colorado (Boulder), and much of me is still
Japanese.
Bobbie Van-Nix
Bobbiev...@mac.com
poppensa...@mac.com
Business:
Bobbie Van-Nix, President
Poppens & Jeeves
Domestics Placement, Inc.
poppensa...@mac.com
www.poppensjeeves.com