Annan- Tambi !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
V Thiruvalluvan
Thanks Jason Philip for the question
In what aspects is the Malayalee society and culture different from its Tamil counterpart?
Generally, Malayalees and Tamilians are the closest cousins (I am discounting the Tulu Community here as Tulu-Malayalee cultures are damn similar, but the former being a community within a larger state, unlike Tamilians in whole representing the state).
Culturally, socially, economically and even in thinking process/attitudes, Kerala and TN are very close to each other in many areas. But equally, there are many differences too and this question is all about that.
The differences occurred primarily because of the Western Ghats which almost insulate Kerala from the rest of India, particularly TN, leaving just one small gap- Palakkad as the gateway between Kerala-TN. And that's one reason, some elements of the culture of Palakkad is a mix of both. And its because Tulu Nadu is on the same side of Ghats as Kerala is, our cultural similarities are much higher than TN, but this answer focuses only on TN-Kerala aspect.
The first difference I noted always is
- Emotional nature
Tamilians in general or in the majority are too emotional. They become emotional so fast and their emotional outbursts are so high. It's very intense. That's why, even a small thing that goes against Tamilian’s interest, result in a very intense response. When I say emotional, I don’t mean despair or sadness etc, rather the intense reaction to any given situation. When news about their favourite leader being hospitalized, you can see scores of them rushing and weeping so opening, hitting chests or even going into an argument with others. That reaction is so intense. If someone talks ill about their language, the reaction would be so sharp, instant and intense as if we have said something ill about their own mother. The emotional nature of Tamilian is so expressive, so revolutionary and extremely intense. It takes some time to cool them off in general
On the contrary, Malayalees, in general, are not intense. Malayalees in my observations, don’t get so offended as fast as a Tamilian does and even so, it won’t be that intense. Malayalees generally trained culturally to hide emotions, to suppress feelings etc. In a way its bad too, as when we suppress feelings, it can convert to much more deadly or ill thoughts, than letting it go at once. I would say, a Malayalees are much like a pressure cooker as far as emotions are considered. It may be there, but hidden, but beyond a level, it will burst like anything which is not frequent, but deadly.
2. Act and think
As a continuation to the above point, Tamilians in majority generally act and then think. That's simply because of extreme intense reactionary emotional nature. Often after that, many start thinking about its consequences or other things. That is good and bad behaviour. The good part, things are done instantly. You want a factory, get it done now. Later only someone will think, will it be deadly for others? The bad part is that things have happened and hard to be undone or redone in a better way.
Malayalees, in general, are opposite to it. We think too much and act little.
I often use a story to justify this difference. Ofcourse a historical myth. It was during the 100 years Chera-Chola wars. The Chola Army has gained significant victories in much of Chera territories and they are swiftly marching towards Mahodayapuram, the Cheran Capital. The Cheras know Cholas are deadly thro’ 100 years of experience. Yet the Cheran council met continuously for 15 days without break to discuss how to break Cholan advancement. That meeting ended on the day when Cholas broke the gates of Mahodayapuram and raided the city, which became too late for any Cheran defences.
That perfectly sums up Malayalee attitudes in general. We spend a lot of time discussing the Pros and Cons of anything thing, even the most trivial things. We discuss so much, that we end up missing the bus. Missing the Bus is a very common terminology we see in Kerala’s English Newspapers as it happens so common in Kerala.
3. Caste factor
There is an interesting thing. Many Indians knew TN had a wonderful movement under Periyar EV Ramaswamy Naicker which was instrumental in elevating lower castes to prominence and rise of Dravidian movements.
But very few actually knew, TN has a very huge casteist society even today. TN’s caste system is very complicated and very feudal in nature, primarily to little inter-mixing of cultures and caste communities historically. This lead to a compartmentalization of cultures to the caste, so you have Brahmin culture, Gounder Culture, Thevar culture all being upper castes but little linkages to each other. Within lower castes or Dalit castes, similar compartmentalization factor can be seen. The Dravidian movement was primarily a caste movement to enable the lower castes and native castes to claim absolute rights over the system, rather any cultural reformation or social reformation. The aim of caste movement was to capture their share of public rights and indirectly- POWER which is why the caste movement slowly morphed into a political movement.
This means you still have caste groups so active in TN and TN is one state that has absolute Dalit Majority, yet the power still remains within few elite castes even after Dravidian movement.
This is a bit opposite in Kerala. Historically we too had massive caste-cultural compartmentalization, but thanks to the Renaissance movement, the changes happened was a social reformation, not caste movements. The social reformation means every caste reforms, not just upper castes or lower caste, rather the society as whole reformed and that shaped much of modern Kerala’s social system. Caste still plays a key factor in Kerala Politics but in a subtle or indirect means, not in forefront means.
This means TN has much larger caste abuses, especially in rural sides and preservation of caste hierarchies etc which has been collapsed in Kerala. Kerala experiences comparatively lower rate of caste abuses, even if casteism does exist informally or in subtle format.
4. Leader-Subordinate culture
Maybe because of caste hierarchy being preserved in TN culture, the culture of the leader-subordinate system is too high in TN. You might have seen pics like the below
People have no issues to fall on the feet of their leader, be like a slave to them. The level of leader bhakti is akin to the older days Raja Bhakti. Maybe untill rise of Modi Bhakts at the national level, TN would have been the only state (probably a bit of AP too during NTR’s era) to have such a huge number of unconditional political/celebrity bhakts who raise their leaders/stars etc akin to the level of gods or demi-gods. This culture of elevating their loved ones to godly positions is remnant of feudalistic past which has certain elements still retained in TN. Infact the culture of erecting temples for movie stars or leaders etc all originated from TN
And this is exactly what missing in Kerala. Kerala society is extremely proud of its egalitarian traditions. The renaissance, numerous social movements and rise of communism eliminated the social class hierarchies in the society and leaders or celebrities are never seen as some sort of divine status, rather humans like any one of us. This means the culture of criticisms are widely popular and very limited or almost nil kind of political/celebrity bhakti exists
5. Status quo-Change society
One thing I always noted as a big difference between TN and Kerala is the level of status quo in society.
Kerala is very deeply STATUS QUOIST state in India. It's very hard to reform a system or bring new ideas into action in Kerala. Malayalees are accustomed to the concept of past and very reluctant to change unless its something too fancy to ignore or something that drastically elevates their social/economic status. It takes a lot of efforts, persuasions and even threats for the Malayalee community to change something.
On the contrary, Tamil society is very open to new ideas. Why because? That's the positive side of Point 4. The society is very much leader oriented and most of the public is too much follower oriented. If a popular leader or respected person in the society says something, the public obeys or accepts it, even if it drastically alters their life. For example, if Amma asks people to give up some land for a certain project, a good percentage of people do accept without much questioning thinking its for the larger good. If the same happens in Kerala, you will find action committee being formed and protests happening with several rounds of discussions, meetings and talks to find some middle portion.
6. Agriculture
Both Kerala and Tamil Nadu implemented Land reforms almost in a similar period. However, TN did Land reforms mostly realizing the potential political capital to be gained after seeing Kerala’s experience, while Kerala did primarily to abolish all remnants of feudalism.
TN’s land reforms had so many loopholes that only very few landless actually got land. Infact there was a report that 3 out of every 4 Dalits are still landless in TN, primarily because the reforms Act didn’t want to strip feudal lords or Zamindars from their land completely, so numerous exemptions and loopholes were given.
On the contrary, Kerala’s Land reforms almost eliminated all elements of the Zamindari system in Kerala and it helped a very good percentage of society to get some form of land.
The good part for TN and bad part of Kerala was, TN’s weak land reforms helped to conserve larger agricultural lands even at the cost of having an older system, while Kerala’s land reforms result in fragmentation of land, resulting in dwindling of agriculture and moving those lands into real estate activities.
This resulted in one main thing. TN’s rural areas are strictly agro-based and one can see very larger tracts of agriculture, mostly food crops, while Kerala has very small agricultural land which is mostly cash crops.
7. Complexes and psyche.
In my understanding and observations, Tamilians always exhibit some degree of insecurity traits. I am not saying they feel insecurity or similar in totality, but some traits of it. They feel, their culture, particularly their language is being threatened by others and need to PROTECT it. The tendency to protect is much higher in TN, which has also given birth to some radical cultural/linguistic chauvinists though they are numerically small in TN.
This insecurity trait, coupled with their basic trait of obedience to authority/leadership has created some degree of inferiority complexes which they cover up by expressing their domination or aggressive outbursts in public (This comment was said by former Indian Express Editor- Jagannathan in an interview about Tamil Public psyche, not my personal comments). They often believe others don’t give the respect due to them and hence they must command or seek respect thro’ any means. This has pushed some degree of fanaticism and aggressive attitude. This is one thing, Tamils are a bit fanatical against any critics of their culture or language
Now coming to Kerala, there is another set Problem we face. Keralites in general often trained to believe, we represent the best of all. We associate our identity with the land, not with the language. And the land defines our identity. And we take extraordinary pride in that land and claims, we are the best in the world. Look at the tagline of Kerala tourism. We hail our land, the earthly residence of God Almighty. Its not just a tourism tag, rather an expression of the Malayalee psyche that Kerala is nothing by Eden on Earth.
So instead of inferiority complex, its superiority complex that rules Kerala. A good percentage of Malayalees, including me, take extraordinary pride and privilege of our identity and often this might irk/irritate others.
Both Tamils and Malayalees are known for their friendly attitudes and extremely hospitable with a warm relationship. But these undertones of their attitudes is hard to miss. Malayalees, in general, are so boastful of their land and its elements (that includes me which everyone in Quora knows).
Now the positive part of this attitude. The insecurity of Tamilians over their language and its values resulted in aggressive pushing for it, thus Tamil still survives with less foreign linkages. Tamil is one of the few languages that have very limited foreign loan words and almost having a word for most of the things with an ever-expanding dictionary. This is something missing in Malayalam, as Kerala always accepts any other language into its language and Malayalam has maximum foreign loan words in its dictionary.
The positive part of Kerala’s pride in the land, resulting in perfecting the art of lobbying and diplomacy. Malayalees due to their inherent superiority complex, are good in negotiations, good in lobbying as they believe they are good enough to sit with anyone and talk directly and commands respect openly. This is one great quality that helped the Malayalee community to prosper and grow as the society as a whole is so confident in their cultural skills.
8. Prejudices
Despite positive relationships, there are a lot of prejudices each other too which some has some elements of half-truths.
Tamilians generally view Malayalam as some sort of long-lost daughter. Infact a good percentage of Tamilians believe Kerala is actually part of Tamil Nadu, only to be lost because of Brahmins (an element of their anti-Brahminical attitudes prevailing) and their Sanskritization. In that way, there is a bit of colonial attitude seen among Tamilians that Malayalam culture is some sort of subordinate to Tamil culture. So as the clannish behaviour of Malayalees, often make them feel insecure in many times.
It's opposite in Kerala. Keralites sees Tamil culture, particularly the rural culture devoid of Sanskritized elements as some sort of primitive, unrefined etc. This often leads to the Malayalee stereotyping of rural Tamil folks as Pandi, a derogatory slang to refer unpolished, uncivilized Tamil folks in relative context to Kerala’s culture. Malayalees differ against Tamilians over their tantrum-throwing social attitudes.
9. Exhibitionism
Anyone who travelled between Kerala and TN can easily tell, Malayalees are much more fashion-conscious, much more elitist in appearances than Tamilians.
That comes from the Point 7 trait I discussed. Malayalees highlight their superiority thro’ a degree of show off with massive bungalows, gold, lavish dress and overall physical appearance. Most of the Malayalees dream of having 2 storied houses, many gold ornaments and fashionable clothing as part of highlighting their superior status. Tamilians, in general, is very simple.
This is comparatively low in TN. I don’t intend to offend, but the majority of Tamilians don’t care much on their physical appearance. They are what they are as natural. Travel around even rural parts of Kerala, you will find beauty parlours or saloons with various branded facials or unique hair styling options. This is too rare in TN’s rural side. Malayalees, both men and women spend a lot of time on hairstyling in particular. I have a habit on browsing TikTok videos and most of the videos of Malayalee men has something to do with their beard styles, their hairstyles etc, while women do talk a lot of their facial appearance etc, which is comparatively missing in TN. Don’t consider Chennai as TN as TN is much bigger.
Don’t equate Malayalee fashion-conscious with Delhi or Mumbai’s creamy elitist's circles or French / European concepts.
10. Centralization of power
Might be the feudal system concept that is still in Tamil Psyche, TN is one of the best examples of Top-to-Bottom power structure. Every decision happens at the top and hardly anyone at the bottom of pyramid dares to take any decision. It's all that Thalaivya wants and commands.
Its opposite in Kerala. No one in Kerala’s top echelons has the power to command and if so, there is no assurance that rest will obey. So decisions are mostly bottom to top approach. The people in top acts more like facilitators or influencers, but the real action happens at the bottom of the pyramid. That's why Kerala’s power structure is always de-centralized to the core.
11. Endogamy
Traditionally in Kerala, there was mass inter-mixing of communities at least an informal level. The Brahmins/Nampoothiris always married Nairs or similar, ends numerous informal relationships with lower castes and thus the social culture has a lot of inter-caste similar traits. Even physical appearances do change with the mixing of multiple genes.
In TN, the caste system is so rigid that it's almost a capital offence for a Brahmin to mingle with someone lower than his caste grade. This resulted in heavy compartmentalization even at an informal level, thus commonness between caste traits are lower. You can physically distinguish an Upper caste from other castes as the genes are not mixed.
This is one reason in Kerala, it's hard to distinguish people’s caste etc looking at them, somewhat possible in TN.
12. Patriarchial
Both societies are patriarchal, no doubt.
But the degree differs and contradicts. Kerala often has a higher degree of Female independence because of traditional Martriarchal customs of certain castes doesn’t mean females were absolutely independent. They still were under the control of men, but the relative higher social status, helped females to gain higher education, jobs etc. Tamil Ladies, especially in the rural side are fully submissive to their men unlike Malayalee. The Tamil girls are traditionally/culturally trained to be a good housewife, thus in their love affairs, they look for their prospective husbands. It's opposite in Kerala. Malayalee girls make love for lovers, not husbands (which is why breakups and divorces are higher in Kerala).
But Tamil ladies are socially more independent than Malayalee ladies. It's not a big deal to walk alone in the night or drive alone or work/return late in the night for Tamilan ladies, but a big deal in Kerala. The men at home do not bother much if a lady returns home late, say 8 PM etc, as part of work, not something acceptable in Kerala.
So in a way, I can say, Tamil ladies, are more socially independent, but economically/cultural dependent. Whereas Malayalees are more economically/culturally independent, but more socially dependent.
All these observations are a representation of society and its culture in large. It doesn’t mean, everyone is like this way.
Every society has its own traits and culture, which we need to acknowledge. There are positives and negatives to both sides as nothing is absolute.
In general, despite these starking contrasts, Malayalees and Tamilians get glued faster due to the general closeness of the cultures. Every sibling have their differences, but often blood is thicker to have those resolved and get glued.
So essentially that Annan-Thampi (Brotherly) relationships do keep these differences minimal in majority ways.