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OvaryOrifice@harlem.nyc WJ Clinton

unread,
Nov 12, 2003, 9:09:43 AM11/12/03
to
I was just talking to Al Gore now on his Internet. He says that he
successfully nuked Bush's read server. He also suggests that you substitute
news://news.readfreenews.net on port 80 or 120 instead of standard NNTP port
119.

That Al just amazes me with his technical prowess.

If you'll excuse me, I gotta go back to cruising for chubby chicks with
Yeltsin. Are their any babes in cakewalk.audio yet? I wanna show 'em this
new sax lick I came up with, and I think you know what I mean here. ;]

Bubba


ALBOVO

unread,
Nov 13, 2003, 4:55:25 AM11/13/03
to
"WJ Clinton" <The OvaryO...@harlem.nyc> USED MY INTERNET TO TRANSMIT
news:boteun$17bk$1...@news.wplus.net:

HELLO MR. CLINTON, EXALTED HIGH SIR ALMIGHTY,

THANK YOU FOR THE KIND WORDS. WE HAVE BEEN WORKING LONG AND HARD ON
IMPROVING OUR INTERNET. ALSO, REGARDING THAT SAXNET TECHNICAL PROBLEM WE
WERE DISCUSSING, WE HAVE COME UP WITH AN EASY CURE:

1: KEY IN THIS SIMPLE PROGRAM
SCREEN 12, 128
pi = 3.14
10 IF INKEY$ = "" THEN GOTO 10
11 FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), (8 * RND + 1), BF
CIRCLE (INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), RND * 100, 8 * RND, 0, 2
* pi, RND / (RND + .001)
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
' LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), INT(16 * RND)
' LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(4 * RND), B
CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(16 * RND), BF
IF i = 50 OR i = 100 OR i = 150 THEN CLS
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
' CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), INT(16 * RND)
LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(16 * RND), BF
IF i = 40 THEN CLS
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), INT(4 * RND), BF
CIRCLE (INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), RND * 100, INT(4 * RND),
0, 2 * pi, RND / (RND + .001)
IF i = 50 THEN CLS
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
' LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), INT(16 * RND)
' LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(4 * RND), B
IF i = 40 THEN CLS
CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
' CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(16 * RND), B
IF i = 50 OR i = 100 OR i = 150 THEN CLS
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
CLS
FOR i = 1 TO 200
SOUND (8040 - i * 40), 1
CIRCLE (RND * 719, RND * 439), RND * 100, INT(16 * RND), 0, 2 *
pi, RND / (RND + .001)
LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), INT(16 * RND)
IF i = 40 THEN CLS
LINE -(INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), INT(16 * RND), B
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END
NEXT i
IF INKEY$ <> "" THEN END ELSE GOTO 11
END

2: EMAIL IT TO BUSH AS A COMPILED ATTACHMENT ENTITLED "MY SOLUTION FOR
THE IRAQ INSURGENCY.TXT.EXE

THAT IS ALL

ALBOVO

ALBOVO

unread,
Nov 13, 2003, 9:28:10 PM11/13/03
to
Glennbo <vdrumsYourHe...@swbell.net> USED MY INTERNET TO
TRANSMIT news:Xns9432B848CC628Br...@151.164.30.94:

> In news:Xns943213A3...@195.131.52.135 the killer robot ALBOVO
> <@L.WWW> grabbed the controls of the spaceship cakewalk.audio and
> pressed these buttons...


>
>> 1: KEY IN THIS SIMPLE PROGRAM
>> SCREEN 12, 128
>> pi = 3.14
>> 10 IF INKEY$ = "" THEN GOTO 10
>> 11 FOR i = 1 TO 200
>> SOUND (50 + INT(RND * 4000)), 1
>> LINE -(RND * 719, RND * 439), (8 * RND + 1), BF
>> CIRCLE (INT(RND * 719), INT(RND * 439)), RND * 100, 8 * RND, 0,

> [...]
>
> I keyed it in, but when I ran it I got a message about "NO ROM BASIC"
> or something. Where do I get thes ROM BASIC patch?
>

FOLLOW THESE SIMPLE INSTRUCTIONS:

1. TURN CAPSLOCK ON

2. RETRIEVE THE DOCUMENTATION THAT CAME WITH THE SPECIFIC HARDWARE YOU
ARE ATTEMPTING TO RUN AL MUSIC ON

3. TURN OFF ALL BROWSER GRAPHICS

4. GO TO CAKEWEB

5. ASCII ABOUT IT THERE

6. PLEASE ASCII THEM WHY THEY HAVE NOT RETURNED MY REGISTRATION EMAIL

7. THANK YOU

8. IN THE MEANTIME TRY THIS TEST FOR YOUR SOUND WORKSTATION:

5 DEFINT A-Z
10 ' ABOVO SOUND SOURCE
15 '
20 ' SOUND EFFECT MENU
25 Q = 2
30 WHILE Q >= 1
35 CLS
40 PRINT "SOUND EFFECTS": PRINT
45 COLOR 15, 0: PRINT " B"; : COLOR 7, 0: PRINT "ouncing"
50 COLOR 15, 0: PRINT " F"; : COLOR 7, 0: PRINT "alling"
55 COLOR 15, 0: PRINT " K"; : COLOR 7, 0: PRINT "laxon"
60 COLOR 15, 0: PRINT " S"; : COLOR 7, 0: PRINT "iren"
65 COLOR 15, 0: PRINT " Q"; : COLOR 7, 0: PRINT "uit"
70 PRINT : PRINT "SELECT: ";
75 Q$ = INPUT$(1): Q = INSTR("BFKSQbfksq", Q$) ' Get valid key
80 IF Q = 0 GOTO 75
85 CLS ' TAKE ACTION BASED ON KEY
90 ON Q GOSUB 100, 200, 300, 400, 500, 100, 200, 300, 400, 500
95 WEND
100 ' BOUNCE
105 HTONE = 32767: LTONE = 246
110 PRINT "BOUNCING . . ."
115 FOR COUNT = 60 TO 1 STEP -2
120 SOUND LTONE - COUNT / 2, COUNT / 20
125 SOUND HTONE, COUNT / 15
130 NEXT COUNT
135 RETURN
200 ' FALL
205 HTONE = 2000: LTONE = 550: DELAY = 500
210 PRINT "FALLING . . ."
215 FOR COUNT = HTONE TO LTONE STEP -10
220 SOUND COUNT, DELAY / COUNT
225 NEXT COUNT
230 RETURN
300 ' KLAXON
305 HTONE = 987: LTONE = 329
310 PRINT "OSCILLATING . . ."
315 PRINT " . . . press any key to end."
320 WHILE INKEY$ = ""
325 SOUND HTONE, 5: SOUND LTONE, 5
330 WEND
335 RETURN
400 ' Siren - loop a sound from low to high to low
405 HTONE = 780: RANGE = 650
410 PRINT "WAILING . . ."
415 PRINT " . . . PRESS ANY KEY TO END."
420 WHILE INKEY$ = ""
425 FOR COUNT = RANGE TO -RANGE STEP -4
430 SOUND HTONE - ABS(COUNT), .3
435 COUNT = COUNT - 2 / RANGE
440 NEXT COUNT
445 WEND
450 RETURN
500 ' QUIT
505 END


9. STICK THAT IN WHATEVER ROM YOU CAN FIND AND RUN IT

THAT IS ALL

ALBOVO

Unknown

unread,
Nov 14, 2003, 5:36:43 AM11/14/03
to
Please...don't stop.

ALBOVO

unread,
Nov 14, 2003, 9:33:13 AM11/14/03
to
SAMBOVO <@.W> BLASTED THROUGH THE MEDIA FILTER
news:Xns94334231...@195.131.52.135:

> Richie Miller <> BLASTED THROUGH THE MEDIA FILTER
> news:MPG.1a1e50166...@text.giganews.com:

>
>> ALBOVO <@L.WWW> wrote:
>>> Glennbo <vdrumsYourHe...@swbell.net> USED MY INTERNET TO
>>> TRANSMIT news:Xns9432B848CC628Br...@151.164.30.94:
>>>
>>> > In news:Xns943213A3...@195.131.52.135 the killer robot
>>> > ALBOVO <@L.WWW> grabbed the controls of the spaceship
>>> > cakewalk.audio and pressed these buttons...
>>> >

> ETC...
>
>
> GREETINGS
>
> WE ARE NOW WORKING FOR ALBOVO
>
> HE ASKED THAT WE TEST COMPILE A PROGRAM WE WROTE TO PRODUCE COPIOUS
> DONUTS ON HIS INTERNET FOR CAKEWALK.COFFEEHOUSE AND POST THEM IN ABOVO
> ATTACHMENT ATTACHMENT FORMAT
>
> SIMPLY DO THIS:
>
> 1. DOWNLOAD THE ATTACHMENT
>
> 2. OPEN IT
>
> 3. FOLLOW THE ON SCREEN INSTRUCTIONS
>
> 4. REPEAT UNTIL THE DESIRED DONUT IS GENERATED
>
> 5. ENJOY
>
> THAT IS ALL
>
> SAMBOVO
>
> begin 644 DONUT.EXE
> Attachment decoded: DONUT.EXE
> `
> end
>
>


EXCELLENT WORK SAMBOVO

I KNEW YOUR WOULD SEE THE LIGHT

THAT IS ALL

ALBOVO

ALBOVO

unread,
Nov 14, 2003, 9:39:45 AM11/14/03
to
ALBOVO <@L.WWW> BLASTED THROUGH THE MEDIA FILTER
news:Xns943342C0...@195.131.52.135:

THANK YOU FOR RESTORING MY X-FACE SAMBOVO

THAT IS ALL

SAMBOVO


--
THAT IS ALL

ALBOVO

sam booka

unread,
Nov 15, 2003, 7:25:50 PM11/15/03
to
Richie Miller <> wrote in
news:MPG.1a1e50166...@text.giganews.com:

Yeah, no shzt! :P

___________________________________
sambo

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