My Summer Solstice 2014

[Colonel Burke]

How I Spent the Summer Solstice 2014

Day two and counting down to Fall. Yesterday was the longest day of the
year--if you live on or about the equator. Everywhere else it's just a long
day. Speaking of long days, I had one of those yesterday. It happened like
this...... Pleasance dragged me along to JC Penny......and well......



eventually she wandered off somewhere by her lonesome. Which left me milling
around the isles for ten minutes or so--looking for her and beginning to
suspect the store dicks thought I was a likely shoplifter. Then I finally
strolled across one. A freakin' chair! If you've ever been, you know there
aren't more than two of 'em in any of those freakin' Penny stores. I packed
my ass into that chair without delay, settling in for what might be a long
wait. It was a nice chair. Metal frame with an upholstered back and
contoured seat that felt good against my cheeks. But enough of that.



I glanced around and . . .? Wouldn't you know it, I was plopped down right
in the middle of the fucking bras. Which I pretended not to notice, lol.
Fucking row after goddamn row of fucking bras! Bras to hold tits I couldn't
fondle and suck in ten thousand years. Well...... I just sat there twiddling
my thumbs, thinking about that, passing time.



But soon my mind began to wander, as it often does, towards other important
matters; and I found myself called to duty with the sizing up of women's
asses. A good place to do just that. Women everywhere. So then . . . Has it
ever crossed your mind . . . about how lots of women these days have
disgusting fat, sloshy asses? Like a twin lumps of melting Jello in a
shithouse--it's "Quanto orribile!" I assaulted my sensibilities by
picturing, in a military mind, what these young women with "orribile" asses
might look like about a decade or so down the road; and the mental pic
reminded me of the old saying, "an ass like a forty-dollar cow." Surely such
lardasses would never grace the pages of "Cosmo."

The nice firm, tight ass--the Holy Grail benchmark for most men--seemed the
exclusive domain of young teen shoppers, who went about their business in
the B-cup isle. From eighteen on, girls, it's a downhill toboggan ride for
you. I think you know this, too. Of course you do. It explains why you girls
are in such a hurry to get a'hold of a man while you're still young--while
there's still something desirable about you. Personally, I'm a leg n' ass
man, so I appreciate a fine ass, and I'm a good judge of the same. But
enough of that.....



At any rate, sitting there on my own ass, it slowly dawned upon me that my
presence there amid the bras was not especially unnoticed. Then some cow
with an ass like a fucking rhinocerous, blockading the entire isle behind
it, despised me a withering glance. "Like I fucking care, bitch. Cunt!
Nobody would fuck you," I thought. I was just about to get the hell outa
there and go look for Pleasance again when who but she appeared. When she
asked me what I had been doing, I simply said that I had had enough of asses
for one day.



Colonel Edmund J. Burke

U.S. Army, ret.


--
Everything you know is wrong.