somatic experiencing
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kurokawa8
Oct 22, 2009, 10:51:35 PM10/22/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
Splintered off from the "mindfulness" thread.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somatic_Experiencing
A major stroke of luck; the community health center that gives me low
cost counseling has someone on staff who has taken the three year
training course in somatic experiencing! I will start next week and
report any progress.
The therapist said she was very glad to hear I've been training in
mindfulness meditation because it goes hand-in-hand with somatic
experiencing, in fact she said it saves her the time and effort of
having to teach it to me. Luckyyyy!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somatic_Experiencing
A major stroke of luck; the community health center that gives me low
cost counseling has someone on staff who has taken the three year
training course in somatic experiencing! I will start next week and
report any progress.
The therapist said she was very glad to hear I've been training in
mindfulness meditation because it goes hand-in-hand with somatic
experiencing, in fact she said it saves her the time and effort of
having to teach it to me. Luckyyyy!
Triton
Oct 23, 2009, 2:15:30 AM10/23/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
Fantastic news, Kuro, not only for you but also for others who could
benefit from your assessment of the benefits of SE.
Keep us posted
Triton
benefit from your assessment of the benefits of SE.
Keep us posted
Triton
kurokawa8
Oct 27, 2009, 3:25:11 PM10/27/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
I spoke with the SE therapist over the phone before our first
meeting. She clarified she's finished 2 of the 3 years of the
training. I mentioned that my affect dysregulation likely comes from
infant trauma so I dont have a particular recurring memory of the
trauma as defined in the DSM-IV for PTSD. She said as opposed to most
other trauma therapies SE doesn't require a recurring memory of a
specific traumatic episode to be effective. She said it allows for
the body to do what it needs to do to repair itself. I just hope the
"repair mechanism" SE harnesses isn't in fact the self-soothing
mechanism infants learn during infancy from bonding their mother. I
have no idea how this works but I'll find out Thursday.
meeting. She clarified she's finished 2 of the 3 years of the
training. I mentioned that my affect dysregulation likely comes from
infant trauma so I dont have a particular recurring memory of the
trauma as defined in the DSM-IV for PTSD. She said as opposed to most
other trauma therapies SE doesn't require a recurring memory of a
specific traumatic episode to be effective. She said it allows for
the body to do what it needs to do to repair itself. I just hope the
"repair mechanism" SE harnesses isn't in fact the self-soothing
mechanism infants learn during infancy from bonding their mother. I
have no idea how this works but I'll find out Thursday.
Affects4me
Oct 27, 2009, 8:26:50 PM10/27/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
****************************************************
Somatic Experiencing is worth checking out, please share your
experiences, Kuro. You have read the articles on developmental
trauma, which indicates there are many neuronal circuits which get "re-
wired" during the developmental stage, up to age 5. Anything which
might alter or jump start this altered firmware is worth trying out.
The Wiki article said these practictioners also do body work, which is
good, but which would suggest you want to find a body worker with as
much experience as possible, the more the better. Reich originally
referred to "muscular amouring," which I believe is legit. How
effective likely depends on the individual therapist/body worker,
although I do think this is a better combination than just cognitive
therapy. There definately is a freezing in the ANS, which has the
hypothalamus tonus get "stuck" on the sympathetic side, as the
parasympathetic must have the MU receptor system active in order for
the para to function properly. The Alex MU morphology prevents this,
also the para recruits GABA inhibitory neuronal development during
earliest development to block the negative limbic traumatic memory
(which may be very non-specific, the younger you are.) I think this
massive over-growth of the inhibitory GABA inhibitory forming a
massive additional layer of ganglion atop the right ACC (with Alex)
and the right amygdala (with GAD), is just an existing structure,
which you somehow have to figure out ways to try and reduce. These
ganglions are the basis of active repression/suppression as a steady-
state of constant renewal each night, essentially "erasing" much of
your short-term memory every time you go to sleep. (You may have
noticed how when you stay up extra longer, you often can feel less
inhibited; if you combine lack of sleep with the addition of some
alcohol (dont ever drive), this would give you even less inhibited,
but will pass out if too much, so keep it less than 2 shots, or 22
ounces of beer. (I dont do this anymore, cant, period, from meds I
take which cannot take any alcohol, period.) I recall previously you
did EMDR, was able to get thru to your feelings with strong intensity,
even more than you were comfortable with. This suggests you have
active repression/suppression perhaps more so than the Alex Morph, as
you had subjective feelings experiences with EMDR having lessened the
inhibitory steady-state of the inhibitory GABA ganglia. If you had a
full Alex MU morphology, with turned off signal transmission, you
would have remained with feelings numbing, without experiencing
emotions as subjective feeelings within your perceptual awareness,
which you described you did, during EMDR. So I think you want to find
various approaches to overcoming your GABA ganglion, atop your ACC.
There is something much easier which I suggest you try also:
http://www.drhonow.com/dual-muscle-massage-system-faq.php this is Dr
Ho's low voltage muscle massager electrical stimulator. You can have
it provide low voltage electrical stimulation which has you place the
electrodes various head locations, including on the face muscles,
which innervate these, which flows thru Cranial Nerve VII, which then
goes likely into the ACC areas, atleast indirectly. This can shake
up, like an ice breaker, the inhibitory neurons, atleast for a time.
This with the EMDR and hypnosis techniques might combine, along with
your guided meditation and Somatic Experiencing, to give even better
results. I would also suggest including doing the Mind Reading
software, by imitating the facial displays with a mirror, after you
have watched the facial expressions for various emotion face-displayed
states. This gives you "experiential context" for the facial feelings
feedback, what you should be getting with various limbic emotion
states being generated. (These can display on the face even though
not experienced cortextually within your perception as discreet
subjective feelings.) Again, it gets blocked by the Alex MU
Morphology and/or the active repression/suppression. But doing these
FFF facial exercizes helps to have your brain develop these facial
feelings feedback pathways with some new neurons, as the FFF had been
inactive previously, whereas with feelers, it is a primary feedback
tool which provides the ACC subjective limbic feedback on your
reactive emotion states, atleast it is a primary part of the
subjective recognition process, so you want to work with this also.
These are a combination of many ideas you may want to combine in
various ways, depending what you find most helpful. An additonal
note: you can really charge up the endorphins (permitting more signal
transmission temporarily) by first doing some intense exercize, such
as running or jumping jacks, say for 15-30 minutes, then follow up
with a body massage. (You can do this yourself with a body massager
appliance, which you apply to your calf, back, and arm muscles, to get
the greatest effect of endorphin release. Then you proceed to do your
other techniques, including FFF, SE, EMDR, etc, with the heightened
ACC signal transmission temporarily greater. This helps to "make the
connection," as I have previously discussed. Problem is all this
takes alot of time. But for Alexs, it is worth doing it, trying all
these various techniques, to find what works (if you want to gain
access to your limbic information.)
****************************************************
> > > having to teach it to me. Luckyyyy!- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
Somatic Experiencing is worth checking out, please share your
experiences, Kuro. You have read the articles on developmental
trauma, which indicates there are many neuronal circuits which get "re-
wired" during the developmental stage, up to age 5. Anything which
might alter or jump start this altered firmware is worth trying out.
The Wiki article said these practictioners also do body work, which is
good, but which would suggest you want to find a body worker with as
much experience as possible, the more the better. Reich originally
referred to "muscular amouring," which I believe is legit. How
effective likely depends on the individual therapist/body worker,
although I do think this is a better combination than just cognitive
therapy. There definately is a freezing in the ANS, which has the
hypothalamus tonus get "stuck" on the sympathetic side, as the
parasympathetic must have the MU receptor system active in order for
the para to function properly. The Alex MU morphology prevents this,
also the para recruits GABA inhibitory neuronal development during
earliest development to block the negative limbic traumatic memory
(which may be very non-specific, the younger you are.) I think this
massive over-growth of the inhibitory GABA inhibitory forming a
massive additional layer of ganglion atop the right ACC (with Alex)
and the right amygdala (with GAD), is just an existing structure,
which you somehow have to figure out ways to try and reduce. These
ganglions are the basis of active repression/suppression as a steady-
state of constant renewal each night, essentially "erasing" much of
your short-term memory every time you go to sleep. (You may have
noticed how when you stay up extra longer, you often can feel less
inhibited; if you combine lack of sleep with the addition of some
alcohol (dont ever drive), this would give you even less inhibited,
but will pass out if too much, so keep it less than 2 shots, or 22
ounces of beer. (I dont do this anymore, cant, period, from meds I
take which cannot take any alcohol, period.) I recall previously you
did EMDR, was able to get thru to your feelings with strong intensity,
even more than you were comfortable with. This suggests you have
active repression/suppression perhaps more so than the Alex Morph, as
you had subjective feelings experiences with EMDR having lessened the
inhibitory steady-state of the inhibitory GABA ganglia. If you had a
full Alex MU morphology, with turned off signal transmission, you
would have remained with feelings numbing, without experiencing
emotions as subjective feeelings within your perceptual awareness,
which you described you did, during EMDR. So I think you want to find
various approaches to overcoming your GABA ganglion, atop your ACC.
There is something much easier which I suggest you try also:
http://www.drhonow.com/dual-muscle-massage-system-faq.php this is Dr
Ho's low voltage muscle massager electrical stimulator. You can have
it provide low voltage electrical stimulation which has you place the
electrodes various head locations, including on the face muscles,
which innervate these, which flows thru Cranial Nerve VII, which then
goes likely into the ACC areas, atleast indirectly. This can shake
up, like an ice breaker, the inhibitory neurons, atleast for a time.
This with the EMDR and hypnosis techniques might combine, along with
your guided meditation and Somatic Experiencing, to give even better
results. I would also suggest including doing the Mind Reading
software, by imitating the facial displays with a mirror, after you
have watched the facial expressions for various emotion face-displayed
states. This gives you "experiential context" for the facial feelings
feedback, what you should be getting with various limbic emotion
states being generated. (These can display on the face even though
not experienced cortextually within your perception as discreet
subjective feelings.) Again, it gets blocked by the Alex MU
Morphology and/or the active repression/suppression. But doing these
FFF facial exercizes helps to have your brain develop these facial
feelings feedback pathways with some new neurons, as the FFF had been
inactive previously, whereas with feelers, it is a primary feedback
tool which provides the ACC subjective limbic feedback on your
reactive emotion states, atleast it is a primary part of the
subjective recognition process, so you want to work with this also.
These are a combination of many ideas you may want to combine in
various ways, depending what you find most helpful. An additonal
note: you can really charge up the endorphins (permitting more signal
transmission temporarily) by first doing some intense exercize, such
as running or jumping jacks, say for 15-30 minutes, then follow up
with a body massage. (You can do this yourself with a body massager
appliance, which you apply to your calf, back, and arm muscles, to get
the greatest effect of endorphin release. Then you proceed to do your
other techniques, including FFF, SE, EMDR, etc, with the heightened
ACC signal transmission temporarily greater. This helps to "make the
connection," as I have previously discussed. Problem is all this
takes alot of time. But for Alexs, it is worth doing it, trying all
these various techniques, to find what works (if you want to gain
access to your limbic information.)
****************************************************
>
> - Show quoted text -
kurokawa8
Oct 29, 2009, 8:13:39 PM10/29/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
thx for the advice A4M. Lots of good ideas there. Drinking alcohol
would be a tactic of desperation for me since I'm an addict and I quit
12 years ago. I did do a warmup before the session today, though.
So. It was not what I expected. I think it might actually be
beneficial.
How do I describe it? It's not body work or any interactive therapy
other than talking. The ideas appear to be gleaned from animal
behavior. She talked about the sympathetic, parasympathetic, and
"freeze" states of animals, and how they deal with it. Awareness of
surroundings for survival and comfort zones. She pointed out that all
three of these bodily processes are natural, but sometimes can get out
of whack.
She started out by asking me to identify how my body feels, how being
in the room feels. She asked to identify which were good and which
were bad and why.
Then she said that animals are always looking around, getting a sense
of their surroundings so that when they know theyre safe they can,
ahhh, and just settle down and rest.
So her homework for me for the next three(!) weeks until i see her
again is to constantly check out my surroundings, feel things, explore
things. feel the floor. Feel the wall. Look inside of boxes.
Explore. Familiarize myself with my surroundings at all times. Then
be aware of what things trigger sympathetic and parasympathetic
states. Apply Mindfulness to move my focus away from things that
cause sympathetic arousal. Become aware of body sensations good and
bad, just noting them. Ultimately bring my focus to my surroundings
and my senses.
So I've been practicing a couple of hours now. when i vortex into my
computer i take breaks every now and again to rub the floor, look out
the windows, check out the hallway, smell the air, check into my body,
etc. I do kind of feel like a gazelle doing the work required to
trigger a parasympathetic response. Rather than feeling fearful i
concentrate on the work of physical awareness instead of thinking
myself into a tizzy.
I suggested I should do writing to augment the therapy but she said no
that's intellectualizing and kind of "winding up" the thinking that
results in higher nervous sympathetic states.
So that's about it. The 50 minute meeting felt like it was only 5
minutes long. it felt like it just flew by in an instant. I was
truly stunned when she said see you next week, heh. She gave me a
handout. It showed a bunch of examples of causes of sympathetic and
parasympathetic states. It showed the ANS freeze as well. Just a
simple pictorial of two zones intersected by the freeze. then it
showed links to Mindfullness by jon Kabat Zinn. I might be taking
that class in a few months or so if I can scrape up some cash. I'm
doing mindfullness with a Buddhist club already though.
i described my condition to her, and its probable origin from infancy,
and the likelihood that my problems are REALLY deep rooted. She was
very confident the therapy would help me. She did say that the
therapy would probably take a LONG time though.
So thats about it. I went by the library. A bunch of books i ordered
from other libraries showed up:
Somatic Psychology by Hartley
Victims of Cruelty by Eckberg
Imagination, illness, and Injury by Costello
Somatic Psychology and touch Therapy by Shea
The books I really wanted were by the originator of the SE concept
Peter Levine. I believe one of them was unavailable and the other is
still in transit. I'll read through them and share my thoughts here.
> There is something much easier which I suggest you try also:http://www.drhonow.com/dual-muscle-massage-system-faq.phpthis is Dr
would be a tactic of desperation for me since I'm an addict and I quit
12 years ago. I did do a warmup before the session today, though.
So. It was not what I expected. I think it might actually be
beneficial.
How do I describe it? It's not body work or any interactive therapy
other than talking. The ideas appear to be gleaned from animal
behavior. She talked about the sympathetic, parasympathetic, and
"freeze" states of animals, and how they deal with it. Awareness of
surroundings for survival and comfort zones. She pointed out that all
three of these bodily processes are natural, but sometimes can get out
of whack.
She started out by asking me to identify how my body feels, how being
in the room feels. She asked to identify which were good and which
were bad and why.
Then she said that animals are always looking around, getting a sense
of their surroundings so that when they know theyre safe they can,
ahhh, and just settle down and rest.
So her homework for me for the next three(!) weeks until i see her
again is to constantly check out my surroundings, feel things, explore
things. feel the floor. Feel the wall. Look inside of boxes.
Explore. Familiarize myself with my surroundings at all times. Then
be aware of what things trigger sympathetic and parasympathetic
states. Apply Mindfulness to move my focus away from things that
cause sympathetic arousal. Become aware of body sensations good and
bad, just noting them. Ultimately bring my focus to my surroundings
and my senses.
So I've been practicing a couple of hours now. when i vortex into my
computer i take breaks every now and again to rub the floor, look out
the windows, check out the hallway, smell the air, check into my body,
etc. I do kind of feel like a gazelle doing the work required to
trigger a parasympathetic response. Rather than feeling fearful i
concentrate on the work of physical awareness instead of thinking
myself into a tizzy.
I suggested I should do writing to augment the therapy but she said no
that's intellectualizing and kind of "winding up" the thinking that
results in higher nervous sympathetic states.
So that's about it. The 50 minute meeting felt like it was only 5
minutes long. it felt like it just flew by in an instant. I was
truly stunned when she said see you next week, heh. She gave me a
handout. It showed a bunch of examples of causes of sympathetic and
parasympathetic states. It showed the ANS freeze as well. Just a
simple pictorial of two zones intersected by the freeze. then it
showed links to Mindfullness by jon Kabat Zinn. I might be taking
that class in a few months or so if I can scrape up some cash. I'm
doing mindfullness with a Buddhist club already though.
i described my condition to her, and its probable origin from infancy,
and the likelihood that my problems are REALLY deep rooted. She was
very confident the therapy would help me. She did say that the
therapy would probably take a LONG time though.
So thats about it. I went by the library. A bunch of books i ordered
from other libraries showed up:
Somatic Psychology by Hartley
Victims of Cruelty by Eckberg
Imagination, illness, and Injury by Costello
Somatic Psychology and touch Therapy by Shea
The books I really wanted were by the originator of the SE concept
Peter Levine. I believe one of them was unavailable and the other is
still in transit. I'll read through them and share my thoughts here.
Affects4me
Oct 30, 2009, 1:20:57 AM10/30/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
**********************************
Dear Kuro,
You impressed me back when you developed your own EMDR strobe glasses,
as a guy really dong practical stuff trying to solve this problem,
much like an engineer seeks to design a device or procedure to
approach finding a solution, using trial and error. I like it when
you come up with unique approaches, such as your strobe glasses, your
approach with your EMDR therapist was the most intensive, the most
effective results you have obtained, from what I have read of your
progress. I became dissatisfied with talk cognitive therapy 30+ years
ago; that is just my expeience. If I were you, Id be spending my
money after looking up a therapist in your area using this URL I am
going to provide you here, which I found by googling "deep massage
emotional release therapist":
http://www.byregion.net/Deep%20Emotional%20Release%20Bodywork/HealerPages/3/cp/
Please share with us your progress, especially if you are able to find
a well experienced deep massage therapist such as I have suggested.
We would all benifit from whatever you can share by exploring this
avenue, and I hope you are able to do this. I think together with the
EMDR, this is what you want to try next, to get the most bang for your
bucks.
Regards,
A4M
**********************************
> > There is something much easier which I suggest you try also:http://www.drhonow.com/dual-muscle-massage-system-faq.phpthisis Dr
Dear Kuro,
You impressed me back when you developed your own EMDR strobe glasses,
as a guy really dong practical stuff trying to solve this problem,
much like an engineer seeks to design a device or procedure to
approach finding a solution, using trial and error. I like it when
you come up with unique approaches, such as your strobe glasses, your
approach with your EMDR therapist was the most intensive, the most
effective results you have obtained, from what I have read of your
progress. I became dissatisfied with talk cognitive therapy 30+ years
ago; that is just my expeience. If I were you, Id be spending my
money after looking up a therapist in your area using this URL I am
going to provide you here, which I found by googling "deep massage
emotional release therapist":
http://www.byregion.net/Deep%20Emotional%20Release%20Bodywork/HealerPages/3/cp/
Please share with us your progress, especially if you are able to find
a well experienced deep massage therapist such as I have suggested.
We would all benifit from whatever you can share by exploring this
avenue, and I hope you are able to do this. I think together with the
EMDR, this is what you want to try next, to get the most bang for your
bucks.
Regards,
A4M
**********************************
Affects4me
Oct 30, 2009, 2:02:01 AM10/30/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
******************************************************
Kuro,
Forgot to mention, these are my suggestions on exaggerating either
your sympathetic or parasympathetic:
first sympathetic: do jumping jacks, run 300 yard dash full out, jump
on a trampoline!, think of what pissed you off worst ever THEN SHOUT
REALLY LOUD ABOUT IT!, try that Dr Ho's massager I told you about on
setting above 3!
for parasympathetic: after the exercize, do yoga or stretching
exercizes, then get a full body massage or atleast use a back electric
massager on your calves, back, neck, back of head, and arms, then take
a long, hot bath with epsom salts. listen to classical music (Mozart).
Youll get more of what you are looking for, and it will save your
pocketbook.
*****************************************************
On Oct 30, 12:20 am, Affects4me <philmcdonald_2...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> **********************************
> Dear Kuro,
> You impressed me back when you developed your own EMDR strobe glasses,
> as a guy really dong practical stuff trying to solve this problem,
> much like an engineer seeks to design a device or procedure to
> approach finding a solution, using trial and error. I like it when
> you come up with unique approaches, such as your strobe glasses, your
> approach with your EMDR therapist was the most intensive, the most
> effective results you have obtained, from what I have read of your
> progress. I became dissatisfied with talk cognitive therapy 30+ years
> ago; that is just my expeience. If I were you, Id be spending my
> money after looking up a therapist in your area using this URL I am
> going to provide you here, which I found by googling "deep massage
> emotional release therapist":http://www.byregion.net/Deep%20Emotional%20Release%20Bodywork/HealerP...
> ...
>
> read more »
Kuro,
Forgot to mention, these are my suggestions on exaggerating either
your sympathetic or parasympathetic:
first sympathetic: do jumping jacks, run 300 yard dash full out, jump
on a trampoline!, think of what pissed you off worst ever THEN SHOUT
REALLY LOUD ABOUT IT!, try that Dr Ho's massager I told you about on
setting above 3!
for parasympathetic: after the exercize, do yoga or stretching
exercizes, then get a full body massage or atleast use a back electric
massager on your calves, back, neck, back of head, and arms, then take
a long, hot bath with epsom salts. listen to classical music (Mozart).
Youll get more of what you are looking for, and it will save your
pocketbook.
*****************************************************
On Oct 30, 12:20 am, Affects4me <philmcdonald_2...@yahoo.com> wrote:
> **********************************
> Dear Kuro,
> You impressed me back when you developed your own EMDR strobe glasses,
> as a guy really dong practical stuff trying to solve this problem,
> much like an engineer seeks to design a device or procedure to
> approach finding a solution, using trial and error. I like it when
> you come up with unique approaches, such as your strobe glasses, your
> approach with your EMDR therapist was the most intensive, the most
> effective results you have obtained, from what I have read of your
> progress. I became dissatisfied with talk cognitive therapy 30+ years
> ago; that is just my expeience. If I were you, Id be spending my
> money after looking up a therapist in your area using this URL I am
> going to provide you here, which I found by googling "deep massage
>
> read more »
kurokawa8
Nov 20, 2009, 4:12:24 AM11/20/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
I had my second SE session today. I caused a big stink and got them
to give me one session every two weeks instead of every three.
I have been doing a lot of reading and I am convinced I have a long-
term deep-rooted PTSD, where alexithymia is one of the symptoms. I'm
also convinced the mindfulness meditation practice along with Somatic
Experiencing, hemoencephalography, and medication will lead to a cure.
For anyone interested in SE the first book one should read is "Waking
the Tiger" by Peter Levine. My therapist says SE has developed quite
a bit since the publishing of the book, although as far as she knew
the new stuff hasn't really been published yet. I've read it and have
begun several of the exercises, along with the exercises I have
acquired from therapy.
SE is gentle, as opposed to EMDR which is extremely harsh. SE is
almost like a simple trick. It's just a way of acting like animals do
to allow the neurology to heal itself. However there is still a lot
of hard work to do.
The work I've been doing has been paying off, but i can't exactly
describe how. All I can say is I have achieved states of
equaninimity, reduced chronic pain, and deeper body awareness. But
it's still just the beginning and will take a long time.
Today's session has been about my practice for the previous week. We
added exercises to find places in my life and living space that are
less irritating. Instead of spinning in a hopeless nerve-grating
state of shock i am searching for and discriminating between states of
high irritation and low irritation. that will be the beginning of the
retraining my neurology to find and achieve a state of calmness, thus
giving my neurology a chance to heal itself.
My writing is not the greatest. tonight. Tired and stuff.
> ...
>
> read more »
to give me one session every two weeks instead of every three.
I have been doing a lot of reading and I am convinced I have a long-
term deep-rooted PTSD, where alexithymia is one of the symptoms. I'm
also convinced the mindfulness meditation practice along with Somatic
Experiencing, hemoencephalography, and medication will lead to a cure.
For anyone interested in SE the first book one should read is "Waking
the Tiger" by Peter Levine. My therapist says SE has developed quite
a bit since the publishing of the book, although as far as she knew
the new stuff hasn't really been published yet. I've read it and have
begun several of the exercises, along with the exercises I have
acquired from therapy.
SE is gentle, as opposed to EMDR which is extremely harsh. SE is
almost like a simple trick. It's just a way of acting like animals do
to allow the neurology to heal itself. However there is still a lot
of hard work to do.
The work I've been doing has been paying off, but i can't exactly
describe how. All I can say is I have achieved states of
equaninimity, reduced chronic pain, and deeper body awareness. But
it's still just the beginning and will take a long time.
Today's session has been about my practice for the previous week. We
added exercises to find places in my life and living space that are
less irritating. Instead of spinning in a hopeless nerve-grating
state of shock i am searching for and discriminating between states of
high irritation and low irritation. that will be the beginning of the
retraining my neurology to find and achieve a state of calmness, thus
giving my neurology a chance to heal itself.
My writing is not the greatest. tonight. Tired and stuff.
>
> read more »
kurokawa8
Dec 22, 2009, 3:03:50 PM12/22/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
I'm seeing some good results. I've been practicing orienting myself
in times of stress instead of bracing against it. By orienting I mean
observing and exploring my surroundings while practicing mindfulness
in seeing things as they are without interpretation.
in times of stress instead of bracing against it. By orienting I mean
observing and exploring my surroundings while practicing mindfulness
in seeing things as they are without interpretation.
One time i went into a public place and felt anxious and overwhlemed,
but luckily with presence of mind I jerked myself away from bracing
but instead scanned the area, my 12 3 6 and 9 and it worked! i
discharged the stress that would normally settle into the chronic pain
in my side and head and throat.
I've had 4 or 5 other similar experiences since then. I'm successfuly
circumventing my previous habit of bracing against negative arousal.
The therapy is slow and deliberate but its working. The practice of
indfulness is crucial. I've been doing that religiously as well.
I've also discovered how alexithymic symptoms can result from PTSD. I
read it in Babette Rothschild's "The Body Remembers". I returned it
to the library already so i can't remember her exact words but she
discussed a concept called "coupling". Long-term trauma will lead the
sufferer to repeated negative arousal. Over time ANY kind of arousal
is associated with negative arousal. Novel experiences, sexual
arousal, all of it becomes coupled with a negative perception.
Eventually the sufferer will not be able to feel pleasure or
anything. All roads lead to negative arousal so they tend to brace
against it. They become anhedonic. They become avoidant,
hypersensitive and irritable. There is certainly never a sense of
release, relief, processing, or discharge of emotional turmoil. Hence
it presents as alexithymia. I wish I could express it as well as she
had. i think I'll check it out again just to get the description of
coupling right. I haven't been able to find the concept on google.
In addition to orienting and mindfulness i've been practicing
reconnecting with my body. For instance I'll tap on my right hand for
a few minutes and stop, and then feel the residual tingling on my
right hand. then i affirm "I can feel my right hand. My right hand
is part of me. I own my right hand." and then I take a few moments
to feel the sensation. and so on through my body. then i do the same
thing with the3 shower head every time I take a shower.
Very recently in my mindfulness meditation practice i've been noticing
sensation in the core of my body. It feels like nausea,
unpleasantness, gloopy, something. My SE therapist says thats a VERY
good sign. So we'll see.
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kurokawa8
Dec 22, 2009, 5:48:45 PM12/22/09
to Alexithymia Exchange
oh forgot to mention the book with the Somatic Experiencing
exercises: Healing Trauma by Peter Levine. Excellent.
exercises: Healing Trauma by Peter Levine. Excellent.
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