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[Pauls_funnies]... CONFUCIOUS SAY:

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Jan 7, 2009, 5:19:42 PM1/7/09
Paul's Funnies


Man who stand on toilet high on pot.
Man who jizz in cash register come into money.
Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time.
Man who fart in church must sit in own pew.
Man who finger girl having period get caught red handed.
Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.
Baseball wrong--man with four balls cannot walk.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
Learn to masturbate--come in handy.
Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock.
Man who buy drowned cat must pay for wet pussy.
Virgin like balloon--one prick, all gone.
He who lives in glass house, dress in basement.
Passionate kiss, like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.
Boy who go to sleep with stiff problem wake up with solution in hand.
Couple on 7-day honeymoon make hole weak.
Girl who sit on jockey's lap get hot tip.
Girl who sits on Judge's lap gets honorable discharge.
Lady who go camping must beware of evil intent.
Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion.
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
He who fishes in others' holes often catches crabs.
Can you use indefinitely in a sentence?
When your balls are slapping up against her ass, you're
What drives a lesbian up the wall?
A crack in the ceiling.
A little girl came running into the house crying and
miserable. She asked her mom for a glass of cider.

"Why do you want cider?" asked Mom.

"To take the pain away," sobbed the little girl.

Tired of all the tears, Mom poured her a glass.

The little girl immediately put her hand into the drink.

"It doesn't work!" she yelled.

"What do you mean?" asked Mom.

"Well," sniffed the little girl, "I overheard my sister
say that whenever she gets a prick in her hand,
she can't wait to get it in cider."

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