Anagrams
Mr Funny Bone
transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase.
The following examples are quite astounding!
Dormitory = Dirty Room
Evangelist = Evil's Agent
Desperation = A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code = Here Come Dots
Slot Machines = Cash Lost in 'em
Animosity = Is No Amity
Mother-in-law = Woman Hitler
Snooze Alarms = Alas! No More Z's
Alec Guinness = Genuine Class
Semolina = Is No Meal
The Public Art Galleries = Large Picture Halls, I Bet
A Decimal Point = I'm a Dot in Place
The Earthquakes = That Queer Shake
Eleven plus two = Twelve plus one
Contradiction = Accord not in it
This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. =
In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero,
Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.
Politicians:
---------------
George Bush = He bugs Gore
Ronald Reagan = A darn long era
Leroy Newton Gingrich = Yon Right-winger Clone
Margaret Thatcher = That great charmer
The Conservative Party = Teacher in vast poverty
And the grand finale:
-----------------------------
"That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind." Neil
A. Armstrong =
A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on
moon! On to Mars!
(me thinks either a computer helped with this or someone has a little
too much time on their hands!
--
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Martin Smith
>
> ....
>
> This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
>
> To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
> mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. =
> In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero,
> Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.
>
Was there a version of Hamlet done by anybody else then ?
BloodRed
>Was there a version of Hamlet done by anybody else then ?
Kenneth Branagh (sp?) received an Oscar nomination in Best Adapted
Screenplay for Hamlet; the strange thing is that it was a word-for-word
faithful performance of Shakespeare's text!
--
BloodRed
[remove .NOSPAM from address to mail]
Al
:Mr Funny Bone wrote:
:>
:> ....
:>
:> This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
:>
:> To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
:> mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. =
:> In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero,
:> Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.
:>
:
:Was there a version of Hamlet done by anybody else then ?
dunno who the author is, but most certainly not shakespeare :)
----------------------------------------
HAMLET, revised.
The big gripe at PTA meetings today is that such reading matter as
Dickie Dare and Dick and Jane are not important and educational
enough for elementary school kids. Here's how Larry Siegel proposes
first-graders be exposed to the world's important literature:
FUN WITH HAMLET AND HIS FRIENDS
by William Shakespeare
See the man. What a funny man. His name is Hamlet. He is a prince.
He is sad. Why are you sad, Hamlet?
"I am sad, for my father has died," says Hamlet. "My father was the
king."
Where are you going, Hamlet?
"I am going to the castle," says Hamlet.
On the way he meets a ghost. "Where are you going?" asks the ghost.
"I am going to the castle," says Hamlet.
"Boo boo," says the ghost.
"What is your name, you silly ghost?" asks Hamlet, clapping his
hands. "I am your father," says the ghost. "I was a good king.
Uncle Claudius is a bad king. He gave me poison. Would you like
poison?"
"Oh, no," says Hamlet. "I would not like poison."
"Will you avenge me, Hamlet?" asks the ghost.
"Oh, yes," says Hamlet. "I will avenge you. What fun it will be to
avenge you."
On the way he meets a girl.
"Where are you going?" asks the girl.
"I am going to the castle," says Hamlet.
"Ha, ha," says the girl.
"What is your name?" asks Hamlet.
"My name is Ophelia," says the girl.
"Why are you laughing?" asks Hamlet. "You are a silly goose."
"I laugh because you are so funny," says Ophelia. "I laugh because
you are schizophrenic. Are you not schizophrenic?"
"I am not a schizophrenic," says Hamlet, laughing and clapping his
hands.
"I pretend I am a schizophrenic. I pretend, for I want to fool my
Uncle. What fun it is to pretend I am a schizophrenic."
See Hamlet run. Run, Hamlet, run. He is going to his mother's room.
"I have something to tell you, mother," says Hamlet. "Uncle Claudius
is bad. He gave my father poison. Poison is not good. I do not
like poison. Do you like poison?"
"Oh no, indeed!" says his mother. "I do not like poison."
"Oh, there is Uncle Claudius," says Hamlet. "He is hiding behind the
curtain. Why is he hiding behind the curtain? I shall stab him.
What fun it will be to stab him through the curtain."
See Hamlet draw his sword. See Hamlet stab.
Stab, Hamlet, stab.
See Uncle Claudius's blood. See Uncle Claudius's blood gush.
Gush, blood, gush.
See Uncle Claudius fall. How funny he looks, stabbed. Ha, ha, ha.
But it is not Uncle Claudius.
It is Polonius. Polonius is Ophelia's father. What fun Hamlet is
having.
"You are naughty, Hamlet," says Hamlet's mother. "You have stabbed
Polonius."
But Hamlet's mother is not cross. She loves Hamlet. He is a good
boy. And Hamlet loves his mother. She is a good mother. Hamlet
loves his mother very much. Hamlet loves his mother very, very much.
Does Hamlet love his mother a little too much? Perhaps. See Hamlet
run. Run, Hamlet, run.
Where are you going, Hamlet?
"I am going to find Uncle Claudius."
On the way he passes a brook. In the brook he sees Ophelia. Ophelia
is drowning.
"Where are you going?" asks Ophelia. "I am going to find Uncle
Claudius." "Glub, glub," says Ophelia.
On the way he meets a man.
"Where are you going?" asks the man. "I am going to find Uncle
Claudius."
"Oh ho. I am Laertes," says the man. "Let us draw our swords. Let
us duel."
"I don't think I am going to find Uncle Claudius," says Hamlet. See
Hamlet and Laertes duel.
See Laertes stab Hamlet.
See Hamlet stab Laertes.
See Hamlet's mother drink poison.
See Hamlet stab King Claudius.
See everyobody wounded and bleeding and dying and dead. What fun they
are having!
Wouldn't you like to play like that?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Life would be so much easier if we could just look at the source code..."
--Unknown
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
al...@columbia.edu
http://www.columbia.edu/~al417
Craig Bennett
>
>dunno who the author is, but most certainly not shakespeare :)
>
However, there is a North End MacBeth.... it is an adult'ish version
set in a slum of a larger city... I have it online at
http://www.autobahn.mb.ca/~theclyde/happy/nem.html
Here is the first scene or two as samples...
------------------------------------------------------------------------
NORTH END MACBETH
ACT 1 SCENE 1
WITCH 1
Hey, when do we all fucking meet again?
WITCH 2&3
When we fuck up Macbeth eh!
ACT 1 SCENE 2
KING DUNCAN
Hey, who the fuck are you eh?
SERGEANT
I’m the fucking bleeding sergeant who gave the fucken beats your
enemies with MacBeth.
KING DUNCAN
Fucking ace man! Hey everybody, say hey to MacBeth and give him the
snitches land and stuff.
ACT 1 SCENE 3
WITCHES
Here comes the man, get ready to mess with his head.
MACBETH
Hey, you crumpets look like dykes!
WITCHES
Hey, MacBeth you rule, but Banquo’s sperm is gonna get the kingdom
after you.
MACBETH
Hey that’s bullshit.
BANQUO
Hey MacBeth, think man, it could be real boss fuck, like you’ll rule,
and so do my sperm eh!
MACBETH
Yeah maybe so fuck, but I’m not gonna work for it eh?
Craig
|--------------------------------------
| Craig Bennett <thec...@NOSPAMmindless.com>>
| http://www.pangea.ca/~theclyde/jokes
| (remove the NOSPAM to mail me)
Mr Funny Bone
>>
>> ....
>>
>> This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
>>
>
>Was there a version of Hamlet done by anybody else then ?
There was a book called 'Hamlet' and it was about a pig that excaped from
it's pen
'Hamlet' being a joke name - as in Ham (which is from a pig)
don't know who the author is though
bd
> Was there a version of Hamlet done by anybody else then ?
There was at least one other version, by Kyd, I believe, mentioned as
early as 1589 (it apparently stunk). There's also a German play with
the same plot called Der Bestrafte Brudermord - I'm pretty sure it
predates Hamlet too. You didn't think Shakespeare came up with the
ideas for his plays all by himself, did you?
See, you learn something new every day.
bd
--
"Send lawyers, guns, and money - the shit has hit the fan"
- W. Zevon
vain attempt to confound the mailbots: remove NO-SPAM from e-dress to
reply
obj:
>
>#!>the walgreen's pharmacy was broken into and a large amount of viagra was
>#!>taken. the local police said to be on the look out for two hardened
>#!>criminals.
Haim Guivon
I wasn't able to crack the Bard's one. English is not my maternal
tongue, and on addition, I am quite dumb. Please, sir, save a soul
(S.A.S) and publish the solution, or send it to my email. (No
nospam stuff. Only hit reply to sender).
Please?
Yours gratefully,
Haim
=====================================================================
Mr Funny Bone wrote:
> An ANAGRAM, as we all know, is a word or phrase made by
> transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase.
> This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
> To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
> mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. =
> In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero,
> Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.
=======================================================================
Haim Guivon
Mr Funny Bone
>Dear Funny Bone:
>
>I wasn't able to crack the Bard's one. English is not my maternal
>tongue, and on addition, I am quite dumb. Please, sir, save a soul
>(S.A.S) and publish the solution, or send it to my email. (No
>nospam stuff. Only hit reply to sender).
>
>Please?
the answer was below the original text !!!
(see below!)
>
>> An ANAGRAM, as we all know, is a word or phrase made by
>> transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase.
>
> > This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare]
>
>> To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
>> mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. =
The above turns into what's written below... DUH !!!!