Belgian jokes

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Rolf Kissel

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Jun 10, 1993, 4:12:37 PM6/10/93
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Actually there are a lot of Belgian jokes too...
If you know any tell them.

The Belgians are known to like chips VERY much...

So, How can you make a Belgian go crazy?

Lock him into a round tower and tell him there are
chips in the corner.

or.. Belgians are said to be quite hmm.. brainless...

So, one day the Belgian king wrote a letter to the Grand-Duke
of Luxemburg, complaining about the bad Belgian jokes in
Luxemburg...

The Grand-Duke who cared a lot for the diplomatic entente
between Belgium and Luxemburg ordered to build a bridge,
just without any reason over dry landscape to give the
Belgians something to laugh about the Luxemburgers too to
improve relationships.

The Belgians laughed and laughed about the stupidity of the
Luxemburgers. But after two years the Belgian king wrote
to the Grand-Duke that now they had laughed enough and the
bridge could be destroyed again.

The Grand-Duke replied that he couldn't do such a terrible
thing and remove the regular meeting place for the 20 Belgian
fishers that met daily on that bridge.

Well, if you know any better jokes, post them please! :-)

ROLF (SOME)
Keywords:

Simon Barker

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Jun 11, 1993, 3:43:54 AM6/11/93
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How do you sink a Belgian submarine ?

Swin down to it and knock on the door.

VERDIER Jean-Francois

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Jun 28, 1993, 11:00:28 AM6/28/93
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Last sunday, the entire submarine belgian fleet sunk. Why?

They organized a doors open day.

Immo Huneke

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Jul 1, 1993, 5:21:56 AM7/1/93
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Here's an ancient joke told at the expense of the Belgians by a Dutch
fellow student:

A Belgian and a Dutchman in the French Foreign Legion found themselves
sharing a billet somewhere in the Middle East. After a while, they fell
into conversation. The Belgian asked the Dutchman why he had joined the
Legion.

"For the money", the Dutchman replied. The Belgian was outraged by such
base motivation. Haughtily, he replied: "Well, I joined for honour".

"So we both came for something we haven't got", observed the Dutchman.

Marc Andries

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Jul 2, 1993, 4:23:35 AM7/2/93
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Okay, okay, if you really want to turn this group into eunet.jokes.nationality, let's
join in:

A Dutch guy says to his Belgian acquaintance:
"I know why you Belgians are so stupid: it's because you drink so much beer !"
To which the Belgian replies:
"And what's YOUR excuse ?"


Marc Andries
(Don't let my email address fool you 8-)
--
+---------------------------------------------------------------+
| Marc Andries (and...@wi.leidenuniv.nl) |
| Dept. of Comp. Science, Leiden University, The Netherlands |
+---------------------------------------------------------------+

Marc Philips

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Jul 2, 1993, 7:32:43 AM7/2/93
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Amazing to hear this from a British because the above conversation
actually happened between Robert Surcouf, a French corsair (sort of
pirate commissioned by the King of France) and a British officer.
The British officer told Surcouf that Frenchmen fought for money
while the British fought for honour; you already know what Surcouf
answered...

True story!

--
Marc PHILIPS Eurocontrol - Central Flow Management Unit
ma...@cfmu.eurocontrol.be Avenue des Arts 19h
Tel: +32 2 729 33 09 B-1040 BRUXELLES
Fax: +32 2 729 32 16 Belgium

Francois PELLEGRINI

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Jul 3, 1993, 7:01:27 AM7/3/93
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In article <1993Jul2.1...@cfmu.eurocontrol.be>, ma...@cfmu.eurocontrol.be (Marc Philips) writes:
|> In article <Huneke_Immo-...@158.234.20.101> Hunek...@Logica.Co.UK (Immo Huneke) writes:
|> >Here's an ancient joke told at the expense of the Belgians by a Dutch
|> >fellow student:

|> >A Belgian and a Dutchman in the French Foreign Legion found themselves
|> >sharing a billet somewhere in the Middle East. After a while, they fell
|> >into conversation. The Belgian asked the Dutchman why he had joined the
|> >Legion.

|> >"For the money", the Dutchman replied. The Belgian was outraged by such
|> >base motivation. Haughtily, he replied: "Well, I joined for honour".

|> >"So we both came for something we haven't got", observed the Dutchman.

|> Amazing to hear this from a British because the above conversation
|> actually happened between Robert Surcouf, a French corsair (sort of
|> pirate commissioned by the King of France) and a British officer.
|> The British officer told Surcouf that Frenchmen fought for money
|> while the British fought for honour; you already know what Surcouf
|> answered...

It was not the King of France, it was Napoleon Ier.


You know about the Well-well's ?

It's a species of birds, which have little legs and huge balls.
So, when they land, they say: "Well, well... well-well..."

Hum-ha!

f.p.
--
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Zeu<FP> : The craziest programmer in France | _________ |
|------------------------------------------------| / | \ \ |
| Francois Pellegrini is : | / |__ ___/ \ |
| pele...@labri.u-bordeaux.fr | \ | | / |
| pele...@geocub.greco-prog.fr | \ | | / |
| pele...@enserb.u-bordeaux.fr | |
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ada G Pfhol

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Jul 5, 1993, 9:26:00 PM7/5/93
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In article <Huneke_Immo-...@158.234.20.101>, Hunek...@Logica.Co.UK (Immo Huneke) writes...

I f it were anymore funnier I might laugh

Mike Worling

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Jul 6, 1993, 11:28:26 AM7/6/93
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Derek Holt (d...@maths.warwick.ac.uk) wrote:
: In article <1993Jul3.1...@greco-prog.fr> pele...@labri.u-bordeaux.fr (Francois PELLEGRINI) writes:
: > You know about the Well-well's ?

: >
: > It's a species of birds, which have little legs and huge balls.
: > So, when they land, they say: "Well, well... well-well..."
: >
: > Hum-ha!
: >
: > f.p.
: >--

: Reminds we of the Alawi tribe (or was it the fekawi tribe?). They were a
: race of pygmies, who got their name because they used to get lost in the
: long grass, and then they would jump up and down shouting
: "We're the Alawi! We're the Alawi!".

From the song "The Wild West Show" :-

The Fuckawe Tribe as "Where the Fuckawe!"

The bird was the Ooh-m-goolly Bird.

And then there was the leopard with a spot for every day of the year. A
leap year? Obvious - lift the leopard's tail.

And so on...

: Derek Holt.
--
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mike Worling, M.I.S., University of Edinburgh, Old College, South Bridge,
Edinburgh, EH8 9YL. Tel. 031-650-2115.

Ian Leonard

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Jul 6, 1993, 5:13:32 AM7/6/93
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In article <1993Jul3.1...@greco-prog.fr> pele...@labri.u-bordeaux.fr (Francois PELLEGRINI) writes:
>
> You know about the Well-well's ?
>
> It's a species of birds, which have little legs and huge balls.
> So, when they land, they say: "Well, well... well-well..."
>
> Hum-ha!
Q. Why do moths fly with their legs apart?
A. Ever seen the size of mothballs.

--
Ian

Ian Leonard i...@eonsw.demon.co.uk
EON Software +44 (0)865 741452

made...@gmail.com

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Jun 21, 2017, 6:53:21 AM6/21/17
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Two Belgians walk on the street and they see something they do not recognize. Here is the conversation:
- Do you know what this is?
- I have no idea.
- Neither do I. How can we find out?
- Maybe we can taste it and see if we recognize it.
- OK.
One Belgian takes a sample with his finger and tastes it. The other does the same. The first one says:
- You know, I think it is dog poo.
- I think you are right. Let us taste again to be sure.
They taste again.
- Yes you are right. This is dog poo.
- Definitely. I am glad we found out.
- Yes. Good to know. And it is a good thing we did not step in it.
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