In one year and out the other

[Erella Ganon]

It is the end of one year and on to begin another. 

In one ear?

Lots has changed, and yet, not as much as I had hoped.

A little before christmas, I developed a little infection in my urinary tract. I was put on a low dose antibiotic. 

A couple days later I was flat out because the infection went into my lungs. 

It was serious. I was absolutely unable to do anything. I guess if I had adrenal glands they would have provided a modicum of the energy that I clearly lacked.

Ok, here's the part when I marvel at the system I have going here. 

I emailed my main specialist and he replied (in 10 minutes!) that this was a task for my main doctor, who was away. 

I called her associate. We know one another and could explain my issues. She called in my prescription for the first medication. The family pharmacist, Peter delivered the antibiotics. 

My regular doctor called me 2 days later and was very concerned with my wheezing and inability to breathe. My chest was sore and had no energy at all. She could hear what was going on by the way I coughed over the phone. 

She called in a stronger antibiotic and Peter delivered promptly.

The next day she checked on me and called in prescriptions for Peter to deliver 2 different steroid puffers. I tell him that it isn't my interest to keep him so busy.

Now it has been a couple weeks. Aside from the puffers and antibiotics, I have been drinking tons of water, some of it with oregano oil in it, some with cider vinegar in there. I have been taking huge doses of vitamin C&D, chicken soup, acidophullis and resting a lot. I think I have it finally under control. 

Celeste ended up with a dreadful chest cold too. 

We spent the majority of the holidays cozy and warm. My sister, Monique dropped off some groceries before she went to North Bay with her husband and kids. We cooked them here, making delicious treats for the two of us. 

Ever since my daughter was born we have been reading to one another. It is a wonderful way to spend time. One of us normally draws pictures while the other one reads. 

I still have the first couple Harry Potter books  completely illustrated by my then-six year old child. This holiday had none of the rushing and craziness that normally colours the celebrations. 

We got an amazing package of individually wrapped packages for christmas from my friend Shirley in Edmonton. It made everything that much warmer and sweeter. She couldn't have known how tremendously rich each gift made us feel. It isn't even our holiday but this year, it certainly was ours. 

Other than the infections, I am sorry to admit that my health issues are not resolved.

I had hoped that by now I would be on to other things.

I was concentrating on decreasing my cortef ever since the surgery to remove my adrenal glands. I started on 100 mg and got as low as 25mg. I was proud of that but it was literally killing me. My doctor moved me back up a bit to give my vital signs a break. 

Then I had more Adrenal Insufficiency Crisis symptoms and he upped the dose again. 

My digestion problems have been persisting and each time, the endocrinologist ups the drugs. Now I am on 40mg and 60 mg on alternating days. Of all the people I know that have had this procedure to remove the adrenal glands, my cortisol needs are way higher than anyone. It alarms me.

I am researching to learn the axis between having Cushing's Disease and Addison's Disease. One has the body over producing the hormones and the other one produces an inadequate amount. It sounds like I am both near-sighted and far-sighted at the same time but with cortisol.

I am going to see another specialist to see if maybe the cushings was masking another ailment. I feel as though I am back at the beginning in a way.

I will start all over again on that front, on a new mission.

This mirrors what is happening with my book. Funny how that happens. Everything is a reflection of every other (unrelated) part of our lives.

It is a little discouraging.

One publisher without funding but a lot of connections and kindness wanted to put out my book. Then another approached me too.

Then a friend of Michele Landsberg  at a fairly big publisher said they wanted to put my book out too. 

My dear friend Ann Dean who is kindly working on a mission of getting my book published came to the meeting at the publisher. 

They didn't treat us very respectfully by their lack of punctuality. The publisher keeps on talking about "the same genre" and she showed us a few books that were just like my book. It was irksome and hard not to feel offended.There is a book she mentioned several times about women artists that are decorating bras artistically for breast cancer awareness. Uh-huh. Personally, I think we have enough awareness of breast cancer. 

The book chronicling the details of an adult artist's cancer treatments told by her teddy bear didn't seem much like what I was doing at all but I understood what she was getting at. We talked about foreign sales and they told us that they don't see the work in colour at all, that it would have more power as a black and white book. 

I was disappointed but could possibly deal with that. We met them in mid November. She said she'd get back to me in 2 weeks at the max with details about our deal. 

Two months later, I finally got a hold of her yesterday. 

She said they still want to put out my book but it needs "a lot of work". The thing hasn't got a strong enough story arc. We know that. 

What do you think? Faithful friends and loved ones, you've seen the images. 

I am alright about writing a few pages through this to hold the story together.

Do you have any opinions that you've been shy about sharing about this work. 

Now is the time for me to hear some opinions.

There are a few granting bodies that I am thinking of applying to. Perhaps an independent publishing situation is sounding good again. The difficulty in distribution is an issue again. I would rather work on the drawings, rather than shipping boxes and writing invoices. 

I think it is time to start again on this one.

It is a new year and as much as I feel as though I have worked hard to reach this point, I think it is time to see what else I can wrangle.

This is interesting. It is a woman who is making history with her hugely successful self published ebook. I give away my images digitally now. Will I be able to put them together in a way that makes sense for people to download? I am not expecting the numbers she managed to garner but I want to be realistic about this.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2012/jan/12/amanda-hocking-self-publishing

Please enjoy.

much love to you.

I cannot tell you how meaningful it is to have people that sincerely care for me out there. 

I want to wish each one of you my best wishes for your happiness.

Erella

For your amusement:

If anyone knows someone that is struggling with learning how to speak english, this might bring you a chuckle.

http://www.thepoke.co.uk/2011/12/23/english-pronunciation/

On the same topic, this clip from I Love Lucy is hysterical. 

http://youtu.be/SmwZqJB_8dQ

Please be well 

and kind.