Re: Sentinel Article
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Chris Smith
Feb 13, 2010, 7:05:40 PM2/13/10
to daysof...@comcast.net, environmen...@googlegroups.com
Summer:
I think this looks good. I went over it and have a couple of changes to suggest - I'll send you a Word file with comments. has markups in Word "track changes."
Two main comments; one, I'm a junior member; I think you should mention a few others, particularly the officers (Julianne can give you the officer's names and official titles) and our adviser, Dr. R.C. Paul, who's supported and been with the group for a long time and is also the KSU Director of Sustainability. You might mention the sustainability web page he maintains at http://www.kennesaw.edu/sustainability/ as well.
Second, in the last paragraph you mention a birthday party on Feb 15th - that's actually two separate events. The meeting at 6:30 on the 15th is a regular organizational meet, and we hope for a big turnout, but it's Monday - your article probably won't be out by then. The birthday party is tentatively planned for February 24th, time and place to be announced. Please mention that one as the meeting that new people should come to to check out the group and join up, and that the details will be posted on our Facebook page. And we hope to see you at both! Good journalism and issue coverage is key to any social change effort, and it would be great to have a reporter "embedded."
Thanks,
Chris
I think this looks good. I went over it and have a couple of changes to suggest - I'll send you a Word file with comments. has markups in Word "track changes."
Two main comments; one, I'm a junior member; I think you should mention a few others, particularly the officers (Julianne can give you the officer's names and official titles) and our adviser, Dr. R.C. Paul, who's supported and been with the group for a long time and is also the KSU Director of Sustainability. You might mention the sustainability web page he maintains at http://www.kennesaw.edu/sustainability/ as well.
Second, in the last paragraph you mention a birthday party on Feb 15th - that's actually two separate events. The meeting at 6:30 on the 15th is a regular organizational meet, and we hope for a big turnout, but it's Monday - your article probably won't be out by then. The birthday party is tentatively planned for February 24th, time and place to be announced. Please mention that one as the meeting that new people should come to to check out the group and join up, and that the details will be posted on our Facebook page. And we hope to see you at both! Good journalism and issue coverage is key to any social change effort, and it would be great to have a reporter "embedded."
Thanks,
Chris
On Fri, Feb 12, 2010 at 11:02 PM, <daysof...@comcast.net> wrote:
Hi guys! Thank you so much for the great information you gave me for the article! I hope that this represents you well and you have a great semester! I would love to be involved in the group as time/commitments allow! If you would like to read the article and give me any feed-back before I send it to Mallory (my editor) I would welcome it. I added a few things about Michael Pollan; if you do not like it, let me know and I will take it out. Thanks again!Best,
Summer
Chris Smith
Feb 13, 2010, 7:05:38 PM2/13/10
to daysof...@comcast.net, environmen...@googlegroups.com
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