Suicidal empath

[ryan...@gmail.com]

I'm going through burnout and suicidal thoughts. Almost every night now for a week I've been staring out my window thinking about jumping. I've been suicidal sense December and can't for the life of me bring myself out of it. My father was abusive when I was young and I have a teacher who's triggering it. I honestly don't know where to go from here. I'm 2 weeks sober from weed, I used it to delve into myself as I feel absorbed in others constantly. I feel so lost right now and have been going through depressions on and off since age 12 I'm now 20. I'm tired of being tired and feeling this way

[Gary]

Hi, Ryan,

I'd say those thoughts are not your thoughts, but coming from an external source. 

Help is at hand, though. There are certainly ways to help you through this.

For a start, you would find the Bach Flower Remedy Star of Bethlehem very helpful for clearing the trauma of abuse and other such things. Trauma tends to accumulate if not cleared and becomes toxic. This results in clinical depression.

Also Hornbeam for weariness and Olive for exhaustion. Oak if you're pushed past your limits. 

The below may also be helpful. It explains what I mean when the thoughts are not from you. They can be from dark entities. 

Entities, which are often disembodied spirits, that is, spirits that have not taken on a physical form in the third dimension, or 3D as some refer to it as, have their own food source. Like anything else, they are seeking a way to grow and become stronger.

As a rule, they seek energy that is similar to themselves in order to feed upon. If a being is considered dark, their natural preference is for energy that is dark. They will then seek out someone who will emit that kind of energy and feed off it.

One of the techniques they constantly use is to create situations that will enable such energy to be created. There are many types of entities wishing to feed, and so there are many different types of scenarios that may be created.

For example, the entity will send dark thoughts to the target’s mind, telling them awful things to try and make them fall into a dark depression. The target will hear in their mind, thoughts about how everyone is better off without them, and how destroying themselves or taking themselves away from their loved ones is the kindest thing they can do.

To the target, it sounds seductive and makes perfect sense. They focus on the things they consider flaws within themselves and feel that they are holding others back. People have committed suicide due to this, which brings about a massive release of negative energies, not only from the person who dies, but also from the loved ones around them. The entity then gets its fill, at least for a little while.

But such energy does not sate or satisfy it for long. It will gain nothing that will aid it, except a longing for more energy. It’s very much like eating fast food as your only diet. You feel good for a very short while, but you become sicker and more depressed as time goes on. Such dark energies are easy to spot for someone who is sensitive. If you relax your eyes and look from your third eye, the room will become dark, as though it is covered in a cloud. If you look at someone’s face, it will fade into darkness, as though a dark shadow is upon it. Sending light and thoughts of love to the darkness will clear it very quickly, and the person who is affected will recover very quickly as the shadows clear.

It’s fair to say that while many depressed people are the target of such entities, they also target what you would term ‘light-workers’.

This is from the free Empath Guidebook which you can download from empathsupport.com or http://www.psi-zone.net/guidebook.html

On Sat, Jun 20, 2015 at 4:47 AM, <ryan...@gmail.com> wrote:

I'm going through burnout and suicidal thoughts. Almost every night now for a week I've been staring out my window thinking about jumping. I've been suicidal sense December and can't for the life of me bring myself out of it. My father was abusive when I was young and I have a teacher who's triggering it. I honestly don't know where to go from here. I'm 2 weeks sober from weed, I used it to delve into myself as I feel absorbed in others constantly. I feel so lost right now and have been going through depressions on and off since age 12 I'm now 20. I'm tired of being tired and feeling this way

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[Angelique Curran]

Hi Ryan,
I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. I don't really know what to say except you are worth far more than you know. I hope you are able to find the strength to love yourself.
Since I don't know what to say to make you feel better I can only think to offer you some unsolicited advice about some actions you might take, given with the best of intentions and true compassion, and not to preach.
Please believe me when I tell you that what we put into our body absolutely affects our thoughts. If you haven't already done so, eliminate processed foods, especially sugar. Eat as many natural and organic foods as you can. You will be amazed at the difference. It also greatly helps to take a few simple vitamins and supplements. Magnesium, omega 3's and vitamin D are all very effective at improving thoughts and feelings.
Although I am bad at taking my own advice here, exercise is an invaluable way to rid the body of excess cortisol, which can worsen anxiety and depression.
Try to avoid pharmaceutical drugs like SSRI's and try Bach Flower remedies, as recommended by Gary.
I know these are all just words that you've probably heard before and I wish I could help more. In the words of the late, great Otis Redding, "try a little tenderness" and try to love yourself, fears and all.
I hope you feel the love and compassion being sent your way by a fellow empath at Earth School.
Ps - watch some Eckhart Tolle or Esther Hicks on YouTube.
With hopeful sincerity, I wish you the best.

> On Jun 19, 2015, at 11:47 AM, ryan...@gmail.com wrote:
>
> I'm going through burnout and suicidal thoughts. Almost every night now for a week I've been staring out my window thinking about jumping. I've been suicidal sense December and can't for the life of me bring myself out of it. My father was abusive when I was young and I have a teacher who's triggering it. I honestly don't know where to go from here. I'm 2 weeks sober from weed, I used it to delve into myself as I feel absorbed in others constantly. I feel so lost right now and have been going through depressions on and off since age 12 I'm now 20. I'm tired of being tired and feeling this way
>

[Sally Warren]

I'd like to add to what Gary has said.  If these things don't seem to be working quickly enough and you are still in crisis mode, PLEASE call a helpline or a hospital in your area, or go to an emergency room.  They will be able to get you through the crisis to a point where you are not suicidal.  I am 63 and was suicidal most of my life, up until 3 years ago--psych units helped in crisis. I did traditional therapy for decades, it didn't help.  BUT doing DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) was a life-changer!!  CHECK IT OUT!!!  Check the phone book for numbers.  A very good hotline is  1-800-273-8255 (TALK).   I feel where you are--you are not alone!!  You need to get help!!  And help is there if you seek it out!!  Prayers and blessings to you.

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From: Gary <xera...@gmail.com>
To: Empath Support Forum <emp...@googlegroups.com>
Sent: Friday, June 19, 2015 6:42 PM
Subject: Re: [empath- ESG: 16142] Suicidal empath

[Gary]

Thanks, Sally and that is excellent advice. :)

[Anna]

Hi Ryan,

Please get yourself to a safe place. Do you have somewhere you can go where you feel safe? For all the people that have read your post, we'd like to know if you're OK -so please respond.
I've been in a similar situation recently, and so have some other people on this forum. For me, it was because I believed in the abusers. It can take awhile to shake off the effects of that. When there is abuse, you just want it to end. To think about how you deserve to love yourself can be such a far reaching goal, but it's possible - even if it's later. Just stop the madness by getting yourself to a safe place. You are loveable. You are perfect the way your are. You deserve love. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

I'm not sure which country you're in, but in the US, you can call 911, go to the police, or go to a hospital for help. They will ask a few questions and have you speak with a psychiatrist. If you have medical insurance and you have a doctor that belongs to a hospital group, you'll get referred to a psychiatrist. Some hospitals will admit your overnight for observation and evaluation. They might recommend that you stay in the hospital for awhile. After this, you go to a partial hospitalization program, then group therapy (where you come upon people who are in similar situations) and then you go to regular sessions with a therapist and also seek comfort in a group. These places might be a little tough for an empath, but try it - it might help you at this stage.

Since your depression started when you were 12, there might be a hormonal imbalance that contributes to your mood. Mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual states are all linked. A doctor will need to check that. The hormonal swings of growing into a young adult can be a difficult time for everyone.

I just read this article this morning - it lets you know you're not alone. https://hpwritesblogs.wordpress.com/2015/06/18/www-thesemicolonproject-com/

Here are more numbers of places you can call.

Suicide intervention helplines

We want to make sure you or the person you're looking out for gets the best help possible and in the most professional hands available for where you are, just look out for your national flag and you'll find your local suicide prevention line.

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Australia - Lifeline (www.lifeline.org.au) *Calling Number* 13 11 14 (24 Hours a Day)

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Canada - National Suicide Prevention Line (www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org) 1-800-273-8255 FREE1-800-273-8255 FREE 1-800-273-8255 FREE (24 Hours a Day)

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United Kingdom - Samaritans  (www.samaritans.org) 08457 90 90 90 (UK) 116 123 (ROI) (24 Hours a Day)

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United States of America - The Trevor Project (www.TheTrevorProject.org) 1-800-273-8255 FREE1-800-273-8255 FREE 1-866-488-7386 FREE (24 Hours a Day)

[cbwv...@gmail.com]

You arent alone. I was abused as a kid & then sadly after being an adult. I'm 44 and every day I fight my own mind. There are good days in between & that's how I survive. I dont know what to say bc I cant even fix myself but if you need someone to talk to that feels exactly the same way.im here

[Gary]

You would also find Bach Flower Remedies very helpful in your healing. I'd be long gone without them. Trauma is not just something you can just 'get over'. 

On Thu, 23 Jul 2020 at 11:39, <cbwv...@gmail.com> wrote:

You arent alone. I was abused as a kid & then sadly after being an adult. I'm 44 and every day I fight my own mind. There are good days in between & that's how I survive. I dont know what to say bc I cant even fix myself but if you need someone to talk to that feels exactly the same way.im here

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