Ankit
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to eggheads
The central market of Agra is one of the most crowded spots in the
once grand city. The thread of history weaves through the folk but
remains largely ignored, like the big white tomb on the outskirts. In
a window above the bustling crowd, two small eyes peer over the ledge
at the world beyond. They brim with questions and doubts, but are
happy observing the crowd and the people from their position.
“Ayan, get away from the ledge.”
Ayan pealed his eyes away from the crowd below. The bike he wants for
his birthday is still on sale in the shop across the street. He will
be a 14 year old boy next week, his mother calls him the big man of
the house now. His little chest puffs with pride at those words, now
if only the big man could get his favourite ride.
As was the afternoon routine post school, Ayan sat on the table toying
his lunch while mother gossiped with Ritu aunty from next door.
“Oh I’m so proud of my Sidharth. Landing himself in Wharton Business
School of all places. He also got into Oxford you know? But he said he
wanted to go to the States instead of London. That’s my boy.”
“Sounds lovely. How much did the whole thing cost you?”
“Oh Neha, intelligent boys like my Sidharth get scholarships. Work on
your Ayan now and maybe he too can be sending you pictures of himself
with Lady Liberty.”
“Ayan is a very smart boy, he picks things up well. I’m not worried
about him. Plus he is barely 14.”
“It’s never too early to start. You know Sidharth sent me some
pictures. You should come by and see them sometime. There’s this huge
button sculpture in the middle of their campus, called the Wharton
Button. They say that if you go in one hole of the button and come out
the other you are gay.”
Ayan’s ears perked up. Now that sounds interesting. Go in one hole and
come out the other all happy. Wouldn’t that end all his worries? The
fat bully in school who threw him down and sat on him because he
wouldn’t give her his lunch, or the older boys in the bus who laughed
at him for not being able to fight back. All of that could go away by
going through a hole in a button. Now he had his assignment for the
day, to Google about this magic button in the distant city of
Pennsylvania. He giggled thinking about the Enid Blyton button and the
Goblin who wore it. It was a funny story, he should pick more of her
books at the library.
Making a quick fix of his lunch, Ayan plopped down in front of the
family computer leaving the gossiping ladies behind. He typed into the
Google search field: “Wharton Button.” Quite a few links popped up,
people telling their stories of how they “came out of the closet.”
That’s funny, why would they be in the closet in the first place?
Finally Ayan found a Wikipedia link explaining the sculpture, it was
used by people to make their announcements to those they wouldn’t be
able to say it to otherwise. It was a safe way of announcing their
sexuality, their sexual orientation. Sexuality? Sexual Orientation?
Isn’t that related to sex? The funny conversation father had recently
tried to have with Ayan about it, the poor man was so tongue-tied. He
was rumbling on about birds and the bees, before Ayan explained to
him. When a man and a woman meet, and fall in love and get married.
They are liable to have some children caused due to unprotected sex.
The look on his father’s face, at having his 13 year old son explain
sex to him was priceless. He babbled something about the internet and
encyclopedias before he checked the browser history on their computer.
Ayan knew what he was looking for, those sites didn’t interest him as
much as they interested his friends. He loved to read and like all
teenage boys sex was his latest topic of interest.
But the terms sexuality and sexual orientation were new to him. He had
somehow managed to skip that topic in his exploration of the internet.
But not for long. He typed “sexual orientation”, and out popped the
explanations. The four broad categories of classification-
homosexuals, heterosexuals, bisexuals and transsexuals. His curiosity
got the better of him and he tried to read on about each one of them.
The revelations were interesting.
So far, for him liking boys or girls had never been an issue. Some
girls he didn’t like some he did and same went for the boys. Reading
it all, he asked himself if he fit into either category. He didn’t
care. His parents were heterosexual, maybe the single man living 2
floors below them was homosexual, the aunties gossiped about that a
lot. Ayan didn’t care. All of them lived their lives, went to work,
did shopping and ate food. The single man was quite nice actually, he
was always sweet to Ayan. Even helped him fix his hair at the barber’s
once, how can someone with such a sense of style be a bad person.
Ayan spend a better part of the afternoon, rummaging through the
different sites learning about the orientations, absorbing everything
like a little sponge. He would have sat there all night had his mother
not called him away from the machine. “It’s time for our evening
stroll in the park, get ready.”
Oh well, the research will have to wait. Ayan got dressed in his
shorts and shoes, and trotted alongside his mother through the crowded
market. Gazing at every person who walked past, wondering what their
orientation would be. The questions kept pestering him, till they
reached the circular park. His mother let go of his hand, told him to
behave, not to fight and play, as she began her regular rounds of the
park.
As Ayan saw his mother walk away, his attention was drawn to the park.
In the center standing opposite each other, were a merry go around, a
circular jungle gym, and two sewage manholes, one of which lay open
due to repairs. To little Ayan’s imagination, the park was the button.
And each of the circles was one of the 4 holes the needle goes through
to sow it. So if Ayan went down the open hole and came out through one
of the others, would he turn gay?