Reply to Matt’s Review

[Forrest Heiderick]

 

Thank you for your suggestions, I agree with you my opening paragraph is a little daunting with that huge math equation, I definitely do not have the desired effect and I can see how it would not entic the everyday reader. In Fact is does not entic me all that much. I’m going to change it. I think that my essay seems a bit scattered, and I think that you are correct in your suggestion about my closing paragraph. It does not stand on the conclusions that are presented in the body. I think over all my essay is a good start, but it needs more focus and better development.