2016-03-03 THRIVE

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Kent Ross

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Mar 3, 2016, 7:14:35 AM3/3/16
to THRIVE, Frigge, Doug, Outram, Chuck & Nellie (KI-Sp), Perkins, Dan, Ray, Ron & Thelma, Richard Umbaugh, Russ Stocke, Zook, Jack

THRIVE MINISTRIES
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March 3, 2016 – Thursday Morning E-Devotional

THRIVE and Remember When ! PHYLLIS DILLER-ISMS" - from John (Ohio)




  You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type. 
-Phyllis Diller

 

            Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.            -Phyllis Diller  


Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance? -Phyllis Diller 
 

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.  -Phyllis Diller 

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.  -Phyllis Diller 

  
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.  -Phyllis Diller  

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. -Phyllis Diller
   
  
Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed. -Phyllis Diller 

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up. -Phyllis Diller 

  
Burt Reynolds once asked me out. But then I was in his room.  -Phyllis Diller   
  
What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. 
-Phyllis Diller 

    
His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.   -Phyllis Diller 
  
Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.  -Phyllis Diller 

My photographs don't do me justice -they just look like me.  -Phyllis Diller 

      
I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'   -Phyllis Diller 

The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.   -Phyllis Diller

 

"Life Is Short. Live It To The Fullest. It Has An Expiration Date"

 

 

 

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