Sister to Brother 如同弟兄姐妹
Dexu Xia
Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.
When a leader asked if I’d speak with her privately, I found Karen in the retreat center counseling room red-eyed and wet-cheeked. Forty-two years old, Karen longed to be married, and a man was currently showing interest in her. But this man was her boss—and he already had a wife.
With a brother who cruelly teased her and a father devoid of affection, Karen discovered early that she was susceptible to men’s advances. A renewal of faith had given her new boundaries to live by, but her longing remained, and this glimpse of a love she couldn’t have was a torment.
After talking, Karen and I bowed our heads. And in a raw and powerful prayer, Karen confessed her temptation, declared her boss off-limits, handed her longing to God, and left the room feeling lighter.
That day, I realized the brilliance of Paul’s advice to treat each other as brothers and sisters in the faith (1 Timothy 5:1–2). How we see people determines how we interact with them, and in a world quick to objectify and sexualize, viewing the opposite sex as family helps us treat them with care and propriety. Healthy brothers and sisters don’t abuse or seduce each other.
Having only known men who demeaned, used, or ignored her, Karen needed one she could talk with sister-to-brother. The beauty of the gospel is it provides just that—giving us new siblings to help us face life’s problems.
How can seeing others as your brothers and sisters help you treat them with “absolute purity” (1 Timothy 5:2)? How do you think Paul’s advice helps both sexes to flourish?
Dear Father, help me to treat others with respect and purity.
劝少年人如同弟兄；劝老年妇女如同母亲；劝少年妇女如同姐妹；总要清清洁洁的。—提摩太前书5章1-2节
有一位教会的小组组长问我是否可以与她单独谈话，我在咨询室找到了她，当时她眼眶泛红、泪流满面。四十二岁的凯伦渴望结婚，现在就有一位男士追求她。这位男士是她的老板，但已经有了家室。
凯伦的哥哥经常对她冷嘲热讽，父亲对她也漠不关心，她很早就发现，自己很容易因为男性的示爱或追求而受感动。即便信仰使她的生命更新，建立了新的界限，但她仍然渴望得到爱，这份瞥见却无法拥有的爱，对她是一种折磨。
我们交谈之后，凯伦和我一同低头祷告。在真诚有力的祷告中，凯伦承认自己陷入了试探，并表明会拒绝她的老板。她将自己的渴望交给上帝，离开咨询室时，她感觉轻松多了。
那天，我体会到保罗的劝勉是多么明智，就是我们在主里要以弟兄姐妹相待（提摩太前书5章1-2节）。我们如何看待对方，会决定我们如何与对方互动。在一个轻易把异性视为物品和性对象的世界中，将异性视为家人有助于我们以合宜的方式对待他们。有良好关系的弟兄姐妹不会去侵犯或引诱对方。
凯伦只认识那些会贬低、利用或忽视她的男人，她需要一个可以如手足般交谈的弟兄。福音的美妙在于预备了主内弟兄姐妹，来帮助我们面对生活中的种种难题。
将他人视如手足，
如何帮助你“清清洁洁”地对待他们？
你认为保罗的劝勉如何帮助两性健康成长？
亲爱的天父，请帮助我以尊重和纯洁的态度待人。