At Our Worst 最恶劣的境地
Dexu Xia
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:2
“She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me.” This sentence, pronounced by Mr. Darcy in Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, is the reason I will never forget that novel and its impact on me. Because after reading that one sentence, I firmly decided I would never like Mr. Darcy.
But I was wrong. Like Austen’s character Elizabeth Bennet, I had the humbling experience of slowly—and quite reluctantly—changing my mind. Like her, I’d been unwilling to get to know Darcy’s character as a whole; I preferred to hang onto my reaction to one of his worst moments. After finishing the novel, I wondered who I’d made that same mistake with in the real world. What friendships had I missed because I wouldn’t let go of a snap judgment?
At the heart of faith in Jesus is the experience of being seen, loved, and embraced by our Savior—at our worst (Romans 5:8; 1 John 4:19). It’s the wonder of realizing we can surrender our old, false selves for who we truly are in Christ (Ephesians 4:23–24). And it’s the joy of understanding that we are no longer alone but part of a family, a “body” of those learning to walk the “way of love”—real, unconditional love (5:2).
When we remember what Christ has done for us (v. 2), how can we not long to see others the way He sees us?
Why do you think you sometimes cling to negative judgments about others? What experiences have you had of “being wrong” about someone?
God, it’s really hard, sometimes, to let go of that impulse to judge and compare, to resist that need to see myself as better than others. Help me to grasp, deep in my heart, the truth that I don’t need to compete and that I am loved.
凡事谦虚、温柔、忍耐，用爱心互相宽容。—以弗所书4章2节
在珍 · 奥斯汀的《傲慢与偏见》里，达西先生说：“她还可以，但还没漂亮到能打动我的心。”这句话让我永远记得这部小说，以及它对我的影响。因为当时我读了这一句话之后，坚信自己永远都不会喜欢达西先生。
但我的判断是错的。我感到很惭愧，正如书中的伊丽莎白 · 班奈特一样，我也发现自己竟然看走眼，这才慢慢地、很不情愿地改变自己的想法。就像她一样，我不愿全面了解达西，只想一锤定音，抓紧他那最恶劣的表现。在读完整本小说后，我不禁思想，在现实生活中，我对谁犯了同样的错误？我因为草率的判断而失去了哪些友谊呢？
福音的真谛是救主在我们最恶劣的时候，看见了我们、爱我们、接纳我们（罗马书5章8节；约翰一书4章19节）。奇妙的是，我们可以将败坏的旧我降服主前，换取在基督里的新我（以弗所书4章23-24节）。欣慰的是，我们不再孤独，乃是上帝家中的一员，能与其他肢体在真实、无条件的爱中学习彼此相爱（5章2节）。
当我们想起基督为我们所做的一切（2节），我们怎能不按照祂看待我们的方式去看待别人呢？
为什么你有时会坚持对某些人的负面评价？
你曾有过哪些“错判”他人的经验？
上帝啊，有时我很难放下那种即时判断和比较的念头，
也很难去抵挡那些自以为比别人强的意念。
求祢帮助我打从心底明白，
我其实不必与人争竞，因为祢深爱着我。