Free Download The Brides Wanted
Mina Delahoussaye
Tara was one of those brides where everything had to be perfect, so early on, Tara placed her priority on the logistics. Because of this, Tara had left the details about the bridesmaid dresses for last.
Tara had organized a lunch for us in April to talk over the details of the dresses. She handed out swatches and said that the dresses must be in that color and floor length. I asked Tara if she was being serious to which Tara asked what the problem was. Simply put, the color was ugly and unflattering. Jane also spoke up and said that this color is going to make everyone in the party look bad. Amy also agreed. Tara rolled her eyes at us and said that she was sure and she expected us as bridesmaids to go along with what she wanted. Lily decided to chime and say that she thought the color was fine. I think that she said this to prevent her younger sister from going full bridezilla.
And here's where I may be in the wrong. Amy, Jane and I decided that enough was enough and that Tara was being really unreasonable about this whole thing, and so was Lily. So we decided to lie to Tara and say that we were going to order dresses in the color she wanted and sent her screenshots of dresses in that color. Meanwhile, the three of us created a separate group chat and decided to order dresses that would actually make us look good. We agreed on baby blue and bought the dresses online. Tara didn't ask any more questions about the dresses and essentially just took our word that everything was okay.
The wedding is all about the bride and the person she is marrying -- traditionally, it was more about the bride, but that's changing. Regardless, for the purposes of this blog, let's assume that I mean the bride and groom, or brides, or grooms, whenever I use the term "bride." It's just going to make it easier for me to write and you to read.
Some brides want long, drawn-out toasts after their wedding dinner -- with six or more people on the list to speak, and me under instructions to hand the mic to anybody else who wants it when the first ones are finished. Other clients want only the Best Man and Maid of Honor to toast -- and then they want the mic put away, period. They do not, for whatever reason (could be a drunken relative with a history of embarrassing them, could be they just HATE sitting through long toasts at other people's weddings), want a line of friends to get up and wish them well, no matter how good their friends' intentions might be. My job is keep control of the microphone and the group, and direct them on to the next planned activity as a diversion -- usually I get a LOT of help from the DJ with some get-up-and-dance music. Or that's when the bride and groom do their first dance. Whatever the timeline and however limited the toasting, those are all details the bride has decided in advance and that my company must execute on her behalf.
What's amazing is the number of times I've been eviscerated by inebriated guests (even parents) because I didn't give them the microphone and let them do exactly what the bride was worried about in the first place. Get a grip people -- I'm not doing this to be personally mean to anyone. I'm doing what the bride wanted and I'm not going to explain that when it's happening because that would be unprofessional. So instead, rant at me and make yourself feel better. Then you don't need to let the bride have it too. It's her wedding night, after all.
Some travel information packets (the destination wedding version of a Save the Date) have verbiage that says the weekend is "Adults Only." It's written in a cute way, but makes it clear that when the real invite arrives, the little darlings will not be included. So if you're starting to plan your travel, you should also be starting to make childcare arrangements. Again, the decision not to include children in their wedding weekend was made by the guests of honor, not their wedding planner. So getting mad at me isn't going to help the situation one way or the other. The decision has been made and other guests have made arrangements for their children. Do the same or don't attend. But be polite about it. You would not believe the abuse some of my brides have taken from nasty family members and friends. And I know you're thinking "they're not really friends if they can't work through this," but the truth is that it's not usually somebody close to the bride making a stink. It's an uncle they're not close to, or the groom's college roommate's wife, or somebody else who wouldn't be missed if they didn't come to the wedding at all. I have received the most flaming emails from guests who had been told to leave the kiddos at home -- one of them even cc'd every single wedding guest and called me a bad person -- as though I personally decided I didn't like his kids and didn't want them to come to Vieques. Really? REALLY??? Somebody's giving this wedding planner a little too much credit. I plan weddings that include children all the time as long as the bride is inviting them.
I recently blogged about brides who are struggling with the public breastfeeding issue at their upcoming weddings, and found myself under a total social media attack as though I personally have a problem with breastfeeding. I don't. I help accommodate guests' needs on a regular basis, and even found and purchased a forgotten breast pump on one occasion. Because that's my job. However, my critics feel that assisting the bride with making sure her conservative family isn't offended at her wedding is a horrible sin. Actually, it's not. It's my job. Anything a bride wants, within reason, it's my job to facilitate. In this case, the bride would prefer the MoH not breastfeed uncovered at her wedding dinner table and has offered her a private bedroom in the villa or suggested gifting a pashmina that will match her bridesmaid dress, and both offers have been slapped down. When the wedding day arrives, I'll try to talk politely on the side with the MoH and see what we can work out. It's certainly worth a try because I want the girls to speak to each other after the wedding weekend. If they don't, it won't be my problem or my fault. I'm just doing my job.
Here's the thing that guests -- especially drunk ones -- seem to forget: I'm the wedding planner, NOT the bride. You don't like the lighting, that's too bad. I'm glad you told me because telling the bride would be very rude. But at the end of the day, I didn't choose it. Nor did I decide to have a beer-and-wine-only bar to spite the guests. That's another decision made, and paid for, by the bride. The decision not to serve desserts at the beach party was hers too -- we gave her several options. And the decision to use a paper runner and wear stilettos on the sand was definitely a very bad one, but I tried to talk the bride out of it and she wouldn't listen and she told me to have the boys put down the paper runner so I did. What was I supposed to do, ignore the bride's instructions? Get into an argument with her at the end of her aisle? Obviously not. Which is why I find it so incredibly bizarre that guests think it's perfectly okay to approach the wedding planner to criticize or verbally attack any aspect of a wedding where they are just a guest. No toilet paper in the bathroom? That is absolutely my responsibility and never should have happened in the first place -- I'm on it, and thank you very much for telling me about it before the bride saw that. But the rest of it is really something you should just sit back and enjoy -- watch if you don't want to participate -- but let the bride and groom, or brides, or grooms or whoever happens to be getting married enjoy the lovely wedding and reception they've planned without the downer of your negative opinions. It's just so, so very wrong.
No really, people say things like that all the time without thinking. I've heard remarks about cake flavor, signature beverage selection, even the bridesmaid dresses and for some reason it isn't clicking for the guest that the bride was the one who made the selections. And the bride always looks so hurt, even if she keeps a brave smile on her face. What is wrong with these people? I wish I could smack certain guests but our insurance company won't let me.
Few of these packages even have the option of booking ad in other newspapers of the Times of India group of newspapers along with the main paper.
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Maslowski has serviced thousands of brides and seen dress styles evolve and change over decades as she's gained a wealth of fashion and business knowledge along the way. She's done the eye-catching window displays since she was a kid.
We offer separate personal showrooms for all of our brides, you will never be trying on next to another customer. Our different showrooms have different amounts of seating availability. Our Premier appointments can accommodate the bride and up to 3 guests.. We do also have private showrooms available for a more intimate and upgraded experience. To see our different experience options, head to our bridal appointment page.
We recognized that brides wanted the option of an elevated shopping experience. To make this happen, we did have to go through the laborious and expensive process of getting our New York State liquor license. We are fully licensed and insured to offer our brides this experience. We have also built out special suites that are separated from the rest of our showroom to allow us to offer a more intimate experience.
We do everything by the book because our brides are too important to us to risk anything with unethical or illegal business practices. We are the only bridal boutique in all of WNY to have their liquor license. Due to these additional expenses, the cost does not come off of the gown purchase, but just look at some of our reviews from other brides to see the experience is more than worth the booking fee.
We have made some shifts in our business these past few years. Due to the lag in the supply chain, we decided to close our bridesmaid and mother of the wedding departments so we could dedicate our space to offering bridal gowns in sizes 00-40 in stock. This way no matter what time frame a bride is on, she can walk out the door with a gown in her size.
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