Crazy Frog Racer 2 Ps2

[Beltran Mathews]

CrazyFrog hit the world last year with his ringtone take on the classic dance tune Axel F. Little did the creators know that the song only really sold because of the original tune playing in the background, rather than for the annoying frog making stupid noises over the top. However, the success went to their heads and an album followed, as did a gaming deal. Thankfully the album bombed; unfortunately, though, the game is still selling in moderate numbers. Find out why this SHOULD NOT BE BOUGHT...

My wife sat watching my play this atrocious Game Boy Advance game via my GB Player on the GameCube and wondered why on Earth I was playing it. She did not even think it was a proper game. It is THAT bad that even my wife, with her limited knowledge of gaming, could instantly tell what a pathetic excuse for a 'game' this is. Quite an impressive feat in its own right...

First of all, when it comes to racing games, especially those using Mode 7 technology, such as Super Mario Kart did on the SNES, it is the actually race track that moves around, whilst the character you are controlling remains stationary. Now, the trick is to make the slight movements of the racer such that they fool the eye of the gamer into thinking it is actually to other way round. Thus all is well in the world. However, that is certainly not the case here. In fact, so poor is the movement of whichever racer you choose, that reaching the finish line takes nothing more than a half-hearted tap to the left or right every now-and-then! There is absolutely no sense of speed or any need to react sharply to avoid crashing whilst going round corners. It is just one of the most painfully mundane gaming experiences I have ever come across...and I played Bubsy the Bobcat on the SNES!

So it makes you wonder just what the developer was thinking. Was its heart really poured into this racing cash-in or did it merely try to make some quick money from the brand name before people grew tired of the stomach-churningly idiotic frog? I will leave that one to you guys, but you would have to hope the latter, for its sake, because if Crazy Frog Racer was the best it could produce, then there is definitely something wrong! Plus, the sheer fact that this is still listed at the scandalous price of 24.99 in most stores is a horror to behold. To think that poor parents are actually wasting that amount of money on something that their children will grow tired of after no more than about ten minutes pains me deeply.

But look at what the concept is on paper. The game states that 'The Annoying Thing' is to star in his own version of Wacky Races. See, that already sounds quite intriguing. You are then told that the crazy amphibian and his friends are to race in a high octane riot through cityscapes and underground mayhem. Wow, this could actually be half decent! Being able to blast your opponents, use zany power-ups and super boosts to screech your way to victory over three cups spread across twelve tracks, complete with eight unique characters, really does sound like a contender for the GBA racing crown, with Mario Kart: Super Circuit and Banjo Pilot being the top two in this genre at the moment. You can even play with up to four-players across four different multiplayer modes.

Yet just wait a second...let us analyse this situation a bit more. First of all, seriously, what friends does the Crazy Frog have that we know about? None that I can even remember after playing through just a few days ago, that is for sure! And furthermore, is twelve tracks really enough nowadays? Doubtful. But anyway, you could be somewhat forgiven for being sucked in by this clever gaming blurb. It would be a shame if you or your children had to partake in such torture, though. I cannot even begin to talk about the music and *shudders* sound effects, for fear of bursting into tears! What a criminal waste of the licensed MusyX Audio Tools from the superb Factor 5...

The graphics are so basic that this could be replicated on the 8-bit NES without much effort, with barely any roadside visuals worth noting and completely indistinguishable weapons at your disposal. So not only are you bored because of the slow pace and depressing visuals, but you also have basically no idea what each blurred weapon icon means...unless you actually play the game for a while, which is not advised if you; 1.) Wish to maintain stable mental health; 2.) Would like to keep your GBA is half decent condition and not see its remains once you have thrown it against the wall / out the window / down the toilet / and so on. It is dire throughout and I cannot think of anything positive to say about it, especially given the cheek of being sold for full price at retail...

When a recent survey of games that made people emotional and upset revealed 'that' Final Fantasy VII death scene as taking the top honours, clearly the people partaking in the poll did not consider that BAD games that make you cry out of frustration, because if they had, this would have blasted into that No.1 spot with ease. Such is the level of sheer drivel this stands for...

Crazy Frog Racer is a Racing Game starring the infamous Crazy Frog, or The Annoying Thing, consisting of two games. The first one was released the 21 of November 2005 while the second one was released the 1st of December 2006. Both games were made by the same company, the French developer Neko Entertainment.

The first game was released on PlayStation 2, Nintendo DS, and the PC while an different version of the game was released on the Game Boy Advance. Its sequel, Crazy Frog Racer 2 was released on the PlayStation 2 and PC.

The Crazy Frog Racer games contains examples of the following tropes: General Adaptational Modesty: Crazy Frog lacks his visible penis from the videos here. Canon Foreigner: Everyone in the first game was created specifically for said game, barring the title character and the robots that appeared in the music videos. The second game brings us the Annoying Drone, a robotic version of the titular Crazy Frog. The Cutie: Ellie is a blond haired fairy who wears a blue dress. Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: Matilda, despite being the sole Secret Character in the first game, is completely absent from the second game and the DS version of Crazy Frog Racer. Evil Chef: Michel, judging from his Slasher Smile and tendency to wave his hatchet around. Fragile Speedster: Crazy Frog, the Holiday Thing and Ellie are really fast and have amazing acceleration, but don't turn particularly well and tend to get bumped around by everyone else. Go-Karting with Bowser: Crazy Frog is racing with several types of Drones (the red and black robots that appear in the music videos). Jack of All Stats: Jack (fittingly enough) and the Annoying Drone have decent stats all around, but don't excel in anything except road-holding. Jiggle Physics: Present on Ellie's breasts and Crazy Frog's belly. Mighty Glacier: Drone and Sub Drone, who have poor acceleration but a high top speed and weight. Skyscraper City: The City Cup from Crazy Frog Racer 2, based on the Axel F clip. Another fun fact: it's also the ONLY landscape of the first game. Crazy Frog Racer Bonus Feature Failure: If you manage to beat all the four cups in the first game, you can unlock a Secret Character, Matilda. Which is just a lambda crazy cow. Lightning Bruiser: Matilda, who has above-average stats in everything: she has 3/4 in speed, acceleration and road-holding in a game where 2/4 is considered average, and is so heavy she actually has 5 points in weight in a game where no other character has any stat above 4. Crazy Frog Racer 2 The Artifact: The game's intro movie was reused without accounting for the characters added to this game and Matilda still appearing at the end of it despite not appearing anywhere else in the game. Mission-Pack Sequel: The second game is almost exactly like the first game, albeit with some new characters based off the music videos, an overhauled item system and some new minigames. It even reuses the exact same track layouts from the first game, but with different skins as to avoid overusing their repetitive Skyscraper City theme. Moveset Clone: Each of the four newcomers in the second game shares their stats with another racer on the roster: The Holiday Thing for The Annoying Thing; Sub Drone for Drone; The Annoying Drone for Jack; And Boss Drone for Michel. Multi-Slot Character: The second game has two versions of the titular frog as seperate characters, his regular self and his Hawaiian-Shirted Tourist costume from "Popcorn, referred to as The Holiday Thing" Palmtree Panic: The Beach Cup from Crazy Frog Racer 2, based on the second Popcorn video clip. Slippy-Slidey Ice World: The Ice Cup from Crazy Frog Racer 2. The Smurfette Principle: With Matilda's removal, Ellie is the only playable female in the second game's roster. Space Zone: The two final tracks of the Football Cup, based on Crazy Frog's dream in the We Are The Champion video clip. Crazy Frog Racer GBA Dolled-Up Installment: This game was created from a reworked version of Mario Kart XXL because they were both created by Denaris Entertainment Software. Dreadlock Rasta: Rasta Dog is based off the Rastafarian stereotype of having dreadlocks, gold chains, rasta hat and smoking a joint. Glass Cannon: Puschel has maxed out acceleration and speed but low curve stability and power. Jack of All Stats: Dream Boy's stats are perfectly even, befitting of his average design. Lightning Bruiser: Big Elk and Toro have maxed out speed and power but low acceleration and low curve stability. Reformulated Game: Unlike the console versions which play like F-Zero, this version is far closer to the likes of Mario Kart: Super Circuit. The Mafia: Mafia Hen is a chicken wearing a brown suit and hat, blue goggles, a black afro and fake mustache. The Quincy Punk: Punk Girl as her name so states, is a punk girl. It also doesn't hurt that her excellent stats make her one of the best characters in the game. Version-Exclusive Content: Aside from the Annoying Thing himself, the remaining characters are exclusive to this version and aren't seen in any other version of the game.

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