The Legalities of Sex
Thanks to Ashton Kutcher, even women are starting to get into the age-
old tradition of ‘dating down’. But in all seriousness, before you
even start to consider a younger woman, you need to ensure that she is
of legal age. Now you might think that this isn’t a big deal, since
you’ve probably boasted to your friends that you can spot a 17-year
old a mile away, but don’t be too sure.
Girls today often dress and act a lot older than they actually are,
and many of them get a thrill and increased popularity from their
friends by dating an older guy. To make matters even more complicated,
the ‘age of consent’ varies from state to state, and the last thing
anyone wants is to be arrested for having sex with a minor.
So this week we have compiled a list of things you should look for so
you can flag girls that may be too young before you make contact with
them, avoiding potential disaster. Remember, alcohol isn’t an excuse
for not picking up on visual cues – like sparkly lip gloss. So keep
reading, and you could save yourself from the humiliation of dropping
her off at her high school, finding out you used to date her mom or
worse.
What she says
One obvious way to catch an minor is by listening to what she says.
Now this may not always practical if you are in a club, but when you
get her alone you need to pay attention. Here are few common slip-ups
that should set off a few alarms:
- Like – kids nowadays love to overuse the preposition “like”. Why?
Nobody really knows, but, like, it’s like, the cool thing to, like,
do? You know? If she uses “like” more than twice in a single sentence,
then your alarm bell should start ringing, and you should start asking
some questions.
- Friends – girls love to talk about other girls. Now this doesn’t
necessarily go away as they get older, but the pre-adult will be very
focused on her friends, since she has very little else to discuss in
her short existence.
- Work talk – or lack of it. If she is the fry-girl at McDonalds,
chances are good her daddy picks her up after her late shift.
- Living arrangements – if she lives at home, chances are she will
either avoid talking about where she lives, or slip-up by talking
about her bedroom. If she doesn’t live at home (has her own place or
lives with roommates), chances are she is over the age of majority and
the coast is clear. But still beware of other signs.
- Parents – if her conversation is peppered with negative statements
about how much she hates her parents, chances are she still lives with
them and is still too immature to deal with rules, regulations and
adulthood.
- Current events – this is not a sure thing, but if she has no
knowledge of current events – like who the president is – but knows a
lot about bands and movie stars, chances are she has algebra homework
to do when she gets home from the bar.
What she wears
Young girls like to show what they got, so what she is wearing could
be a giveaway. Since a younger girl probably doesn’t have the
disposable income of someone who is older and working full-time, look
for some telltale signs:
- Non-designer labels – most of her clothes will come from lower-
priced stores that cater to pre-adults.
- Lots-o-midriff – since younger girls haven’t had the time to put on
weight from binge drinking/a college diet and they are still in gym
class at school, they tend to be thinner. And even if they aren’t
thinner, they all like to show major midriff. Although this can be
pleasing to the eye, take it as a sign she is very young. Older women
usually dress sexy, not too slutty. Plus, the older you get, the less
likely you are to highlight a bad feature – like the infamous ‘gunt’.
- Too dressy – the younger they are, the more important it is for them
to be dressed to the extreme when they go to the bar. Mainly because
it is new to them, and also because they want to look older.
- Make-up – if she is young, chances are she hasn’t worn make-up for
very long. Beware of the girls who pack it on and apply it poorly,
since they think that the more they wear, the better they will look.
What they do
If you are alone with one of these young girls, then you will have had
the chance to speak to her. If you are still unsure about her age and
you still want to try and determine if she is legal age, here are a
few things to watch for:
Mood
- There are two things to look for here. First, if she is very
nervous: darting eyes, afraid to sit near you, talking too much, in
the bathroom a lot, won’t drink anything, looks fearfully toward the
bedroom. These signs might indicate that she has never been in this
situation before. However, it might just means she is nervous. Try and
calm her down with some gentle talk, and then see how she reacts to
some physical contact. Don’t be afraid to ask her why she is nervous.
If she blushes, it might bee because she is too embarrassed to tell
you that this is her first time alone with a man in his apartment/
house/condo. Second, rather than being nervous, she is over the top
aggressive. If she has been trying to pass her self off as legal, then
she might be ecstatic, horny, and excited that it has got her this
far.
Plus, she obviously likes you, and now she wants to take it to the
next level – the bedroom. And let’s face it, she is not necessarily a
virgin, but you are probably the oldest guy she has ever been with.
She may think that you are about to share with her the secrets of sex,
and she will expect this to a better experience than 30 seconds in the
back of someone’s car.
How she makes love
- If you are working up to sex, keep the mood points in mind. If she
is very hesitant, nervous, prone to crying, scared, etc. – it might be
sign that this either very new to her, or that this experience has
gone too far. She may want to have sex, but the reality of the
situation might be a little too frightening.
- The reverse is once again true. She might love it so much she will
either wear you out, or be ‘over the top’ excited.
- Watch how she kisses. Don’t mistake timidity with total
inexperience. The same goes for how she handles you – literally. A
younger girl won’t have had much experience with men, so her
inexperience will give her away.
- Does she want more? An experienced lover will keep at until she has
had all she wants. A younger woman might never have been with someone
who is willing to please her to the degree that you can, so watch to
see if she shuts down after your first go around, or if she looks for
more.
Final thoughts
There is a fine line between being older and shy vs. being younger and
inexperienced. The trick is being able to pick up on the subtle
nuances. Saying no to her at the club will be a lot easier than saying
no to her later on. If you already have her in your bed, the odds are
you won’t care at this point. Just keep in mind that going a night
without a little action is a lot better than a criminal record and
possible jail time. The last thing you want to do is deal with a
hysterical, emotional 17 year-old, so see if you can determine her
legality before you get home. And, if worse comes to worse, don’t be
afraid to ask for her ID.
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