Don't Fear the Karma

[Brian]

Question:

I have only recently started listening to your podcast. Listening to
it has been part of my seeking of a belief system. I have found it
extra-ordinarily difficult to find something to believe in be it
spirituality, ideas, people and even myself. Though I know this issue
has to do more with my own psychology then a faith structure, I have
found the notion of Buddhism to be most in line to what I think is
true of my reality.

My question has to do with the concept of karma. I understand that it
is a central part of Buddhism, but I find that I fear it the most. I
know it is perhaps an irrational fear, but could you explain to me the
causal affects of karma? There have been things which I have done in
my life that I am not particularly proud of, and I have done my best
to make amends to those that I have hurt (emotionally). But, I do not
believe that I have ever been forgiven, I don't know what this means
for me in terms of karma. If I am destined to this feeling of sadness
or not being able to understand that was my past and now I live in my
present.

Answer:

There are a few things to consider with karma. First, karma is simply
the way the universe works, it's like gravity. There's no "mind"
controlling it, nor does it seek "revenge" on people.

You say you have done bad things, and since I don't know you, I won't
argue that point. On the other hand, you say you have made amends to
those you have hurt. If you have truly made amends, then it seems
likely that karma will balance out. You say that you have not been
forgiven... by whom? The person you wronged or by some idea of "God?"
If the person forgave you, then that's all that matters. If you have
truly atoned for whatever it is that you did, then karma will take
care of itself.

There are some things that you might not be able to truly atone for
having done. Some things, you cannot simply just "undo." So, yes, your
actions do have consequences in the next life (lives). You cannot know
the ultimate effect on your karma or what your next life will be, so
there is no point in getting "attached" to the outcome. If you want to
influence your future life, then work hard to live a good life NOW.
Maybe you've messed up in the past, but you still have a future to
make up for it.

The important thing is not to suffer needlessly over the worry.
Whatever happens will happen whether you fear it or not. Learn to act
in a "good" way simply because that is the best way to act, not
because you want some future reward.

Good luck!