Young Gay Boy 10yo Mpg
Arnau Cyr
I don't think you need to change her, especially if as she is sensible and able to handle that side of secondary school. But you could start listening to pop music/watching some more "adult" tv together, to try to shift her onto more grown up culture she's old enough to enjoy.
Does you daughter not go to school at the moment? I can understand not knowing about clothing brands. Also if TV restricted at home I get that she will have limited experience of adult programmes, but not knowing about pop music or celebrities suggests she currently has very little interaction with other children. I grew up in a home with limited TV and no interest in clothes but by age 10 I did listen to pop music on the radio. Other children at school must talk about such things I'd start by allowing a bit more access to popular music.
DD has just started at private secondary from a small rural primary so is definitely not streetwise etc. Neither are any of her new classmates as the secondary school is even more rural.
The school is very strict on uniform including bags + shoes so no opportunity to be fashionable.
Out of school they all tend to be sporty and into rural pursuits so again no need to be streetwise.
I would say the main thing I did to prepare her was talk about how friendships change and to just be her authentic self rather than try to fit in with the popular girls because that's where the drama tends to be.
I think you're right to worry about this. I was a very young 11 year old in a very gentle primary school and really struggled with the secondary transition because everyone else seemed cooler than me: they had bras, perms, and wore makeup and trendy clothes. I knew nothing about anything.
With DD1 I actively encouraged her with trendier clothes and the latest films and music etc from about Year 5. It helped that some of her friends had older sisters so we knew what was cool.
Wasn't an issue with DD2 as she was far cooler than any of us by the time she was about 8!
I wouldn't worry too much. My not particularly 'cool' DD started secondary last year, a comprehensive in London. She's both made friends with girls similar to her, and developed her interests. Some things she's still not really interested in (fashion, boys) others she has - certain tv programmes, music. It seemed to all happen organically.
The only thing we worked with her on before secondary really was the independence side of things, being safe on the roads, getting the bus alone, feeling confident out and about etc
Don't be too worried, she'll find her own tribe once she gets there.
My DD very much isn't into pop music, although I do have the radio on a lot so she is aware of it. She also isn't in to fashion but she's had a lovely group of friends throughout High School.
They gravitate towards other kids like them with similar interests at secondary.
DS still has little knowledge of celebrities at 17. Celebrities are just random people and he has no interest in them or their lives. Many adults aren't interested, it's nothing to do with being 'young'. He has no interest in brands either, just not what he's into.
I wouldn't worry, she will find her own people.
I agree.
At a large school there will be a variety of pupils so your DD would be able to find some like minded ones.
However the the private school is small it could be more of an issue.
My kids were playing with Magnatiles at the museum today and they both say they want this for Christmas. I think it is a great toy, but the reviews all seem to imply they are for younger kids. Do any of your kids as old as 10yo play with Magnatiles? The price for a 100pc set is $120, so it's not exactly a stocking stuffer ....
There are cheaper knock off brands that are very similar. I like the magnatiles slightly better (magnets seem to be a bit stronger) but the difference is small and I'd go for more of the cheaper kind vs. one set of the more expensive ones. We've got multiple sets and I'm considering getting more for Christmas this year.
We had only Magnatiles for years, but last Christmas Amazon had lots of good deals on Stick-n-Stack, so I added several of those sets. They are nearly indistinguishable from the Magnatiles, so you could start there if you don't want to jump all-in. If you get Lakeshore Learning coupons, though, you could use a 20-25% off on the Magnatiles brand.
Yes, at ten they were still getting a workout. We had geomag. It seemed helpful for art sense. Lots of stick people were made to go in the shapes, movies were made. Playing with color was done. 2d vs 3d. Good for fridge art too.
My kid got them when he was 8ish I think, but even at 11 he still plays with them! They are expensive, but that has been a toy that has kept his attention for the longest amount of time. So given that they aren't even really that expensive.
Just had to pop in to say that's what we're asking for as a group present for the kids for Christmas. If you don't quite want to bite the bullet, is there a set of grandparents who might want to give a group gift to both kids?
We finally got some last year. My husband was doubtful. They didn't have a home until sometime in March as they were being played with all day every day. We had to set up a rotation based on days for during read aloud. The only one who doesn't play with them is the 16 year old. All the rest (2-14) play with them all the time. Still pretty much daily.
Go for it. I bought 2 sets when my kids were little and they didn't get used much .Now my 8 year old uses them every day.
Don't buy the knockoffs. Toddlers won't notice a difference in quality, tweens will.
I have a 3-year-old boy who is really well behaved at nursery, they tell me he listens, never hits, and plays nicely. At home it is a different story! He is constantly wanting attention from me, or his brother (6 years old) - if he doesn't get what he wants - (either attention or something he has asked for) he will scream and shout and throw things. We have tried the naughty step, removing him from the situation, hugging him, talking to him, spending time with just him each day...and still he screams and shouts when he doesn't get his way or the attention he wants. I am unsure how to manage this as I feel like his iron will and tempers are ruling the house! Help.
Thank you for reaching out to EmpoweringParents.com. Our main focus is children over the age of 5 because they usually have developed enough that our concepts will work with them. We have a few articles about younger children you may find helpful,
Thank you for the interesting article. I have a 13 year old girl who is generally a very good girl and an excellent student. For the last 6 or so months only right before bed, she starts with negativity. Her comments are varied...lately they're based on why boys like other girls and don't show it with her...what is the point of life when we just have to learn things at school that we generally won't use later...then work and go home etc...that she sits at night and obsesses over little things that have occurred during the day, more than she should, that she's tired at this point of school as it's finished in a couple of weeks she has become tired of all her friends...that summer will be boring for sure and she's not looking forward to it (even though we will be going away for a week) and we will be signing her up for a week or two throughout the summer of badminton camp. I can go on....every night is something. I told her I want to hear her problems and complaints but that I refuse every night literally before she turns off her lights to sleep! It's not a good time as it becomes a long conversation and a heated one as she speaks in an urgent and upset tone then it creates anxiety in me as it gets late, which causes me to have to tell her and she gets upset and am argument ensues. I really don't know if this is normal and what to do! I've told her that we can speak during the day or right after dinner during the school week. She has always been energetic before bed, even as a little girl but from her happy go lucky self it's turned into a negative situation at night now.
She is an only child but so am I, and I was never like this at her age. Help! I feel as though I should get some help and approach my paediatrician for a referral to a councilor or something. Can you please suggest how I should handle my daughter in these circumstances and what I should do moving forward? Thank you!!
I have a 13 year old step son (as of 3 years ago) that spends 3 - 6 weeks with us per year. He is very disrespectful, argumentative, a liar, and manipulative. He also has anger issues and is grossly overweight (39.8 BMI). When he visits, my husband gets tired of dealing with him and lets him play on his gaming system for as many as 12 hours at a time. No responsibilities around the house, no consequences, etc. I am so miserable I want to go to a hotel while he's here. My husband has two other kids from another wife but my stepson is an only child with his mother. I raised 3 children, now adults, to be respectful, accept consequences, have empathy, etc. My stepson plays his parents back and forth and I try to point out when a consequence should be given. For ex. he lives in an apartment with his mom and continues to leave his footballs outside and they disappear. His mom tells him she's not buying him anymore so he calls my husband and he tells him he'll send him a football (to another state) without even talking to his ex-wife about this problem. I told my husband this would have been an incredible way to teach him some responsibility with a consequence like doing chores to earn money to buy another one that he might take better care of if he has to use his own money.
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