George Bush the iPod Salesman
Juan Hobenaro
WASHINGTON, DC帰mid growing anti-war protests and polls indicating
eroding public support for an invasion of Iraq, President Bush is
offering U.S. taxpayers a rebate in the amount of $300 if we go to war.
paragraph 6:
"Which reminds me, have you seen these new iPods?" added Bush, pulling
an Apple-brand MP3 player from his pocket and holding it up to the
crowd. "It costs $299 for one of these little buggers, but it holds a
thousand songs. They're amazing."
:^)
http://www.theonion.com/onion3908/bush_offers_taxpayers.html
flip
<hobenaro-436AA1...@clmboh1-nws2.columbus.rr.com>,
Juan Hobenaro <hobe...@somewhere.com> wrote:
If that story is an accurate representation, it's scary.
$300 for each taxpayer if and only if they support a first strike
against Iraq?
What's next? $300 if they support deportation of blacks to Africa? $300
if they support dropping environmental laws? $300 if they support
cancellation of the 2004 election?
Very, very scary.
flip
> <hobenaro-436AA1...@clmboh1-nws2.columbus.rr.com>,
> Juan Hobenaro <hobe...@somewhere.com> wrote:
>
> > Bush Offers Taxpayers Another $300 If We Go To War
> >
> > WASHINGTON, DC帰mid growing anti-war protests and polls indicating
> > eroding public support for an invasion of Iraq, President Bush is
> > offering U.S. taxpayers a rebate in the amount of $300 if we go to war.
> >
> > paragraph 6:
> > "Which reminds me, have you seen these new iPods?" added Bush, pulling
> > an Apple-brand MP3 player from his pocket and holding it up to the
> > crowd. "It costs $299 for one of these little buggers, but it holds a
> > thousand songs. They're amazing."
> >
> > :^)
> >
> > http://www.theonion.com/onion3908/bush_offers_taxpayers.html
>
>
That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
me it's a joke.
Mike Dee
news:flippo-47ABC2....@news.central.cox.net:
>> > paragraph 6:
>> > "Which reminds me, have you seen these new iPods?" added Bush,
>> > pulling an Apple-brand MP3 player from his pocket and holding it up
>> > to the crowd. "It costs $299 for one of these little buggers, but
>> > it holds a thousand songs. They're amazing."
>> >
>> > :^)
>> >
>> > http://www.theonion.com/onion3908/bush_offers_taxpayers.html
>>
>>
>
> That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
> me it's a joke.
>
Your President isn't this inept, surely?
"I'll throw in another $20 per dependent if we invade by the end of next
week."
"I get the green light from the American people, and they get 300
smackeroos,"
"... I can't think of a better way to show the citizens of this nation that
war truly pays."
"buggers"?
"smackeroos"?
Please, someone tell he doesn't actually speak like this (in public).
D.
Nicolas
No, but it's pretty damned close.
Nicolas
C Lund
flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
>That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
>me it's a joke.
It's a joke. theonion.com is a satire site.
--
C Lund, Oslo
http://www.notam02.no/~clund/
Flip
<christopher.lund-B5...@amstwist00.chello.com>,
C Lund <christop...@NOSPAMchello.no> wrote:
> In article <flippo-47ABC2....@news.central.cox.net>,
> flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
>
> >That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
> >me it's a joke.
>
> It's a joke. theonion.com is a satire site.
Thank goodness.
They did a good job. It was just plausible enough to be good satire.
In fact, I believed it at first and posted a response, then thought
about it and cancelled that response before posting the above.
Nice to see that satire's still alive.
C Lund
Flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
>> >That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
>> >me it's a joke.
>> It's a joke. theonion.com is a satire site.
>Thank goodness.
>They did a good job. It was just plausible enough to be good satire.
>In fact, I believed it at first and posted a response, then thought
>about it and cancelled that response before posting the above.
>Nice to see that satire's still alive.
You should visit their main page. Lots of other good stuff there as well,
such as the "White History Year Resumes" story and the "Kuwait Deploys
Troop" jibe. B)
Patrick Nihill
I liked one of the lines from a "man-in-the-street" about the Great
White fire disaster:
"How many more people must die before no-one ever dies again?"
--
Pa Nihill
Mark Weaver
> In article <flippo-47ABC2....@news.central.cox.net>,
> flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
>
>> That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please
>> tell me it's a joke.
>
> It's a joke. theonion.com is a satire site.
Yes it is satire, but they do have a track record of fooling the gullible
into believing their articles are actual news, like this:
John C. Randolph
flip wrote:
>
> > In article
> > <hobenaro-436AA1...@clmboh1-nws2.columbus.rr.com>,
> > Juan Hobenaro <hobe...@somewhere.com> wrote:
> >
> > > Bush Offers Taxpayers Another $300 If We Go To War
> > >
> > > WASHINGTON, DCĐAmid growing anti-war protests and polls indicating
> > > eroding public support for an invasion of Iraq, President Bush is
> > > offering U.S. taxpayers a rebate in the amount of $300 if we go to war.
> > >
> > > paragraph 6:
> > > "Which reminds me, have you seen these new iPods?" added Bush, pulling
> > > an Apple-brand MP3 player from his pocket and holding it up to the
> > > crowd. "It costs $299 for one of these little buggers, but it holds a
> > > thousand songs. They're amazing."
> > >
> > > :^)
> > >
> > > http://www.theonion.com/onion3908/bush_offers_taxpayers.html
> >
> >
>
> That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
> me it's a joke.
Yes, it's a joke.
-jcr
George Graves
flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
I'm as conservative as they come, and Bush scares me too. BUT
characterizing him as someone who wants blacks deproted to Africa is
going a bit too far, and is unfair, in my opinion. Bush wants those
balcks to VOTE for him! And luckily for all of us, his power is very
limited and he can do none of the things mentioned above. Hopefully, the
Democrats will have someone, in 2004, who can defeat him. Of course I
couldn't vote for any Democrat, but the rest of urban America could and
defeat Bush (I'll just write-in Pat Buchanan's name like I always do).
--
George Graves
George Graves
Enough <eno...@idontcare.com> wrote:
> In article <flippo-47ABC2....@news.central.cox.net>,
> flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
>
> The only joke in the article is George W. Bush.
You may laugh, but he's the most powerful man on earth, at the moment.
That thought should wipe the smile off your face, it sure has mine.
--
George Graves
Steve Mackay
"George Graves" <gmgr...@pacbell.net> wrote in message
news:gmgraves-BBDFAB...@newssvr13-ext.news.prodigy.com...
> In article <7MH9a.3081$ge3.1...@twister.tampabay.rr.com>,
> Enough <eno...@idontcare.com> wrote:
>
> > In article <flippo-47ABC2....@news.central.cox.net>,
> > flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote:
> >
> > > > In article
> > > > <hobenaro-436AA1...@clmboh1-nws2.columbus.rr.com>,
> > > > Juan Hobenaro <hobe...@somewhere.com> wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Bush Offers Taxpayers Another $300 If We Go To War
> > > > >
Iraq, President Bush is
> > > > > offering U.S. taxpayers a rebate in the amount of $300 if we go to
war.
> > > > >
> > > > > paragraph 6:
> > > > > "Which reminds me, have you seen these new iPods?" added Bush,
pulling
> > > > > an Apple-brand MP3 player from his pocket and holding it up to the
> > > > > crowd. "It costs $299 for one of these little buggers, but it
holds a
> > > > > thousand songs. They're amazing."
> > > > >
> > > > > :^)
> > > > >
> > > > > http://www.theonion.com/onion3908/bush_offers_taxpayers.html
> > > >
> > > >
> > >
> > > That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please tell
> > > me it's a joke.
> >
> > The only joke in the article is George W. Bush.
>
> You may laugh, but he's the most powerful man on earth, at the moment.
> That thought should wipe the smile off your face, it sure has mine.
The scarier thought was that we COULD have had Gore in office.
jjens
> "George Graves" <gmgr...@pacbell.net> wrote in message
> news:gmgraves-BBDFAB...@newssvr13-ext.news.prodigy.com...
>> > > That's got to be a joke, right? The part about the rebate? Please
>> > > tell me it's a joke.
>> >
>> > The only joke in the article is George W. Bush.
>>
>> You may laugh, but he's the most powerful man on earth, at the moment.
>> That thought should wipe the smile off your face, it sure has mine.
> The scarier thought was that we COULD have had Gore in office.
And what, I'd be forced to use an environmentally friendly detergent?
Somehow, I'd take that version of the future.
(mark me as another disgruntled conservative)
George Graves
"Steve Mackay" <steve_...@hotmail.com> wrote:
I'm not so sure any more although I certainly was sure that Bush was the
"lesser of the two evils" when the election was on. After 2 years of
Bush, I'd be ready to even try Algore.
--
George Graves
George Graves
jjens <jj...@adelphia.net> wrote:
Don't I know it!
--
George Graves
Steve Mackay
"jjens" <jj...@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:b48fts$4lhi$1...@node21.cwnet.roc.gblx.net...
I'm not quite so sure of that. As George said, I also thought, and still
think Bush is the lesser of two evils. Neither were a good choice for either
party IMHO. Gore was just too stupid to stop telling overly obvious lies,
and well, Bush definately needs some work on public speaking, amoung other
things. The one thing in Bush's favor, was he picked a very good cabinet.
> (mark me as another disgruntled conservative)
As I am also.
Mike Dee
news:3LP9a.65274$Ge.12...@twister.rdc-kc.rr.com:
> The one thing in Bush's favor, was he picked a very good cabinet.
>
Gee, and here I was, thinking that his cabinet had chosen him!
D.
C Lund
"Steve Mackay" <steve_...@hotmail.com> wrote:
>> You may laugh, but he's the most powerful man on earth, at the moment.
>> That thought should wipe the smile off your face, it sure has mine.
>
>The scarier thought was that we COULD have had Gore in office.
I'd rather see a dull beaurocrat as president of the US than a puppet like
bush. The current US regime is an extremely dangerous one. Apart from
stripping away the rights of US citizens, they also seem intent on enforcing
some sort of "Pax Americana" on the world - which seems to be primarily
motivated by the US need for natural resources and by their newfound
paranoia.
Juan Hobenaro
And in another thread here, you're calling me "clueless" & an "idiot".
You just need to shut up for a while.
Hobenaro
Elizabot
Gee, and here I was thinking that his daddy picked his cabinet for him...
Heywood Mogroot
Hey, either you're with us or you're for the terrorists.
This Pax America thing could work out well if you join up early.
We've got Spain, Italy, and Bulgaria on board already...
don't be late, 'cuz our carrot's getting smaller and our stick's getting bigger.
=Heywood=
Flip
imout...@mac.com (Heywood Mogroot) wrote:
> C Lund <christop...@NOSPAMchello.no> wrote in message
> news:<christopher.lund-D1...@amstwist00.chello.com>...
> > In article <zdP9a.65122$Ge.12...@twister.rdc-kc.rr.com>,
> > "Steve Mackay" <steve_...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> >
> > >> You may laugh, but he's the most powerful man on earth, at the moment.
> > >> That thought should wipe the smile off your face, it sure has mine.
> > >
> > >The scarier thought was that we COULD have had Gore in office.
> >
> > I'd rather see a dull beaurocrat as president of the US than a puppet like
> > bush. The current US regime is an extremely dangerous one. Apart from
> > stripping away the rights of US citizens, they also seem intent on
> > enforcing
> > some sort of "Pax Americana" on the world - which seems to be primarily
> > motivated by the US need for natural resources and by their newfound
> > paranoia.
>
> Hey, either you're with us or you're for the terrorists.
That's ridicululous.
C Lund
>Hey, either you're with us or you're for the terrorists.
>
>This Pax America thing could work out well if you join up early.
>We've got Spain, Italy, and Bulgaria on board already...
>
>don't be late, 'cuz our carrot's getting smaller and our stick's getting
>bigger.
Umm.. you're being sarcastic, right? Binary arguments don't fit very well in
the real world. In this particular case, I'm neither for the US nor for
Saddan Hussein. I wish the whole issue could be settled in a real-life
deathmatch between Hussein and bush. That would make pretty good TV too.
>=Heywood=
Jason S.
>I'm as conservative as they come, and Bush scares me too. BUT
>characterizing him as someone who wants blacks deproted to Africa is
>going a bit too far, and is unfair, in my opinion. Bush wants those
>balcks to VOTE for him! And luckily for all of us, his power is very
>limited and he can do none of the things mentioned above. Hopefully, the
>Democrats will have someone, in 2004, who can defeat him. Of course I
>couldn't vote for any Democrat, but the rest of urban America could and
>defeat Bush (I'll just write-in Pat Buchanan's name like I always do).
One problem is that many, many people seems to actually believe the
nonsense coming from W's mouth regarding Iraq and WMD. I expect that
relatively few are familiar with the non-propaganda account:
http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/03/07/sprj.irq.un.transcript.blix/
After W's press conference last night, the local conservative talk
radio station had an hour or so of call-in, with a hard-right hawkish
host leading the "Go W!" cheers. I think they all believe that the
Al Samoud 2 missile is some sort of ICBM that Iraq has been hiding for
years. Of course, it was only a few weeks ago that a panel concluded
that these missiles had a range a whopping 22% in excess of the
permissible range!
http://www.npr.org/programs/atc/transcripts/2003/feb/030225.siegel.html
Following this determination, Iraq began destroying the missiles.
According to Bush, though:
"Iraq's dictator has made a public show of producing and destroying a
few missiles, missiles that violate the restrictions set out more than
10 years ago."
http://www.abcnews.go.com/sections/us/DailyNews/bush_newsconf_transcript030306.html
The implication is that Iraq has known for more than 10 years that
these missiles were in violation, a truly baseless assertion by
Bush.
During this conference, Bush also called for "total disarmament" of
Iraq, purportedly approved by the Securoty Council (a lie: Saddam does
not have to "totally" disarm!) He also claims "Saddam Hussein is not
disarming," another lie (Blix cannot find /anything/ except the Al
Samoud 2, which only recently was declared to be proscribed).
Also without proof, Bush claims:
"And I've got good evidence to believe that. He has weapons of mass
destruction, and he has used weapons of mass destruction in his
neighborhood and on his own people. He's invaded countries in his
neighborhood. He tortures his own people. He's a murderer. He has
trained and financed Al Qaida-type organizations before -- Al Qaida
and other terrorist organizations."
Where is the proof that Saddam has trained members of Al Qaeda? Osama
bin Laden /hates/ Saddam and the Ba'athist government!
Of course, Saddam's invasion of Iran was /at least/ as justified as
Bush's invasion of Afghanistan (the basis in both cases being
state-sponsored terrorism; Saddam also had genuine concerns about
an Iranian invasion of Iraq). Saddam's treatment of insurgents in
Iraq is hardly any different than Israel's treatment of Palestinians.
Blix also stated:
"As I noted on the 14th of February, intelligence authorities have
claimed that weapons of mass destruction are moved around Iraq by
trucks, in particular that there are mobile production units for
biological weapons. The Iraqi side states that such activities do not
exist.
"Several inspections have taken place at declared and undeclared sites
in relation to mobile production facilities. Food-testing mobile
laboratories and mobile workshops have been seen as well as large
containers with seed-processing equipment. No evidence of proscribed
activities have so far been found."
and (perhaps a shot at the U.S. "intelligence"?):
"I should add that, both for the monitoring of ground transportation
and for the inspection of underground facilities, we would need to
increase our staff in Iraq. I'm not talking about a doubling of the
staff. I would rather have twice the amount of high-quality
information about sites to inspect than twice the number of expert
inspectors to send. "
Despite the fact that many thinking conservatives have abandoned
support for Bush, the ignorance of the public combined with pervasive
propaganda from the administration may allow him to maintain his
popular support.
And that's scary.
katie star
saturday night li\ve? Anxiously waiting for that new "Fat Gap" store
to open up near you?
The onion is a satire site.
flip <fli...@mac.com> wrote in message news:<flippo-0B402A....@news.central.cox.net>...
> In article
> <hobenaro-436AA1...@clmboh1-nws2.columbus.rr.com>,
> Juan Hobenaro <hobe...@somewhere.com> wrote:
>
> > Bush Offers Taxpayers Another $300 If We Go To War
> >
> > WASHINGTON, DC?Amid growing anti-war protests and polls indicating
Mike Dee
news:3E6863C3...@grayREMOVErock.org:
I suspect you're probably closer to the truth here, than most :-(
D.
Heywood Mogroot
> In article <dd5de929.03030...@posting.google.com>,
> imout...@mac.com (Heywood Mogroot) wrote:
>
> >Hey, either you're with us or you're for the terrorists.
> >
> >This Pax America thing could work out well if you join up early.
> >We've got Spain, Italy, and Bulgaria on board already...
> >
> >don't be late, 'cuz our carrot's getting smaller and our stick's getting
> >bigger.
>
> Umm.. you're being sarcastic, right?
What, you don't like the New American Century?
Our Dear Leader and his administration may have been asleep at the
wheel prior to 9/11, but he's going to make up for it now!
I for one am looking forward to the discount crude oil we'll be
getting for installing American(TM) brand democracies in the Persian
Gulf. Look how well the Pax Americana working in Afghanistan, Turkey,
and Pakistan.
Make No Mistake (R), this administration will pull every string to
secure for the future its National Security interests, until it is
booted from office late next year.
In the meantime, disregard that man behind the curtain & enjoy the
show.
=Heywood=
Steve Mackay
"Elizabot" <booR...@grayREMOVErock.org> wrote in message
news:3E6863C3...@grayREMOVErock.org...
Hmm, ya know, don't get me wrong. I am no fan of GW, but I hear the
'daddy' thing quite often. Yet no one can come up with any proof that George
SR helped him do much of anything during, or after the election. And with
all the major media being overly liberal, they would have had a field day
with any evidence to support this popular theory.
Steve Mackay
"C Lund" <christop...@NOSPAMchello.no> wrote in message
You really think that Gore was, or is bright enough to run this country
without someone else pulling the strings? He had a hard time keeping his
lies straight, much less our country. It wasn't the 'boring part', or the
fact that he chuckled every time he told a lie, or the fact that he normally
looked like he had a fresh dose of formaldahyde. It was his obvious
stupidity. He couldn't even stop telling overly obvious lies, even after his
supporters told him to stop.
Now don't get me wrong, I am far from being a fan of GW.
Elizabot
I wasn't refering to the election.
Cheney. Iran-Contra. Poindexter. Convictions. Pardons. Skull and Bones.
I don't mean to be insulting, but what decade were you born in? If you
were to say 70's, I'd understand.