OT: Portrait of the Server as a Old Dog
Mark Wonsil
> ...that it has dog-like attributes. Just like a good dog the 3000
> responds quickly to a variety of commands, it attempts to please and
> it is low maintenance. We use similar words to describe the 3000 and
> dogs. words like faithful, reliable and enduring. You get a sense of
> comfort knowing that it is there without having to check on it
> constantly. Please do not misconstrue this statement to be anti-cat.
> Cats are wonderful animals, I'm sure. I just don't equate them to the
> 3000. If you do feel free to express why. The same offer applies to
> gerbils, hamsters, elephants etc. (No weasels, please. This about the
> server not management.) To answer one last question: Yes, I am insane.
Some random thoughts:
Some dogs can be real bitches.
Cats can purr right along but they can also scratch volumes.
You really can't leave a dog alone all weekend like your 3000.
A dog drools, a 3000 spools.
It's OK to cold boot your 3000.
I rather play in a Java sandbox on a 3000 than a cat's sandbox anytime.
Hotels will let Alfredo bring a 3000 into his room for the night.
I'd rather have a tarball than a hairball.
The cat, dog and the 3000 all have tails. (The 3000's is in its shell)
I wouldn't want to do a stack trace on a cat's heap or a dog's dump.
You can teach POSIX to an old 3000 but you can't teach an old dog gnu
tricks.
Mark W.
If you want peace, work for justice;
If you desire justice, respect the law;
If you make law, protect liberty.
Liberty breeds Peace.
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Christian Lheureux
- Unlike a cat but like a dog, the 3000 does not need a mouse to run.
- Even better than a dog, you don't need to walk your 3000 around the block
for ... well ... you know what.
- It's sometimes said that a 3000 may perform like a dog (that's where the
Performance Consultant in me surfaces, eh eh eh, blatant plug). I yet have
to hear of a 3000 performing like a cat.
- Oddly enough, a 3000 never barks. It sometimes purr smoothly (heard these
disks ?).
- The 3000 is smarter than most old dogs : yes, you can teach him new
tricks, like Posix, Apache, Sendmail, etc.
- And, last but not least, the 3000 definitely is NOT a cat. At least not
yet. Want proof ? In PUB.SYS, you can still find the MAKECAT utility. I yet
have to find any "MAKEDOG" utility.
But there may be a few contradictions there : MPE itself is a cat. Want
proof ? It has many more lives than the average dog, perhaps as many as 9,
like all good cats have. It's been living as MPE, MPE V/E, HPE, MPE/XL,
MPE/iX ... Soon living again in 7th heaven, er ... above the emulator ?
DISCLAIMER : This is FRIDAY HUMOR, or at least an attempt at. This statement
should not be construed as pro-dog, or anti-cat, or discriminating against
any ainaml species, including -but not limited to- cats, dogs, humans, other
mammals, other non-mammal animal species, plants, multi-cellular or
uni-cellular living organisms, or others.
Peace,
Christian Lheureux
Responsable du Département Systèmes et Réseaux / Head of Systems and
Networks Department
APPIC R.H.
business partner hp invent
Tel : +33-1-69-80-97-22 / Fax : +33-1-69-80-97-14 / e-mail :
lheu...@appic.com <mailto:lheu...@appic.com>
AIM nickname : MPE Evangelist
"Le Groupe APPIC recrute, contactez nous !"
> -----Message d'origine-----
> De : HP-3000 Systems Discussion [mailto:HP30...@RAVEN.UTC.EDU]De la
> part de rosenblatt, joseph
> Envoyé : jeudi 9 janvier 2003 15:41
> À : HP30...@RAVEN.UTC.EDU
> Objet : [HP3000-L] OT: Portrait of the Server as a Old Dog
>
>
> With apologies to Dylan Thomas.
> I always get a chuckle when I see postings from Cat Fanciers'
> Association,
> Inc. (Not that the posting about a down server is funny.) I
> chuckle because
> I have always think of the 3000 as a dog. I don't mean the
> server is a "dog"
> as used in the vernacular; I mean that it has dog-like attributes.
> Just like a good dog the 3000 responds quickly to a variety
> of commands, it
> attempts to please and it is low maintenance. We use similar words to
> describe the 3000 and dogs. words like faithful, reliable and
> enduring. You
> get a sense of comfort knowing that it is there without
> having to check on
> it constantly.
> Please do not misconstrue this statement to be anti-cat. Cats
> are wonderful
> animals, I'm sure. I just don't equate them to the 3000. If
> you do feel free
> to express why. The same offer applies to gerbils, hamsters,
> elephants etc.
> (No weasels, please. This about the server not management.)
> To answer one last question: Yes, I am insane.
>
> Work for Peace
>
> The opinions expressed herein are my own and not necessarily
> those of my
> employer.
> Yosef Rosenblatt