Re: How the Fight started - Hilarious - I had a great laugh

[bhargav mahesh vyas]

  GREAT ONE

THANKS
BHARGAV


On Fri, 23 Jan 2009 KETAN MEHTA wrote :
>
>enjoy this one, I did,
>Ketan (mamoo)
>Subject: ...And then, the fight started.
>
>My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was
>flipping channels.
>She asked, 'What's on TV?'
>I said, 'Dust.'
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>My wife and I are watching "Who Wants To Be A
>Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and
>said, "Do you want to have sex?"
>"No," she answered.
>I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
>She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying,
>"Yes."
>So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
>And then the fight started....
>
>******************************************
>Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made
>my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into
>the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and
>proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The
>wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the
>garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the
>weather would be bad all day.
>I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and
>slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back,
>now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The
>weather out there is terrible."
>My loving wife of 10 years replied, "Can you believe
>my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
>And that's how the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were
>alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out
>of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo
>stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well
>I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!!
>He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and
>shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY !!!"
>So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which
>one are you?"
>And then the fight started.....
>
>  *****************************************
>My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our
>upcoming anniversary.
>She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to
>250 in about 3 seconds.'
>I bought her a scale.
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I
>take her someplace expensive...
>so, I took her to a gas station.
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>After retiring, I went to the Social Security office
>to apply for Social
>Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my
>driver's license
>to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized
>I had left my
>wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very
>sorry, but I would have
>to go home and come back later.
>The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my
>shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That
>silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and
>she processed my Social Security application When I
>got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience
>at the Social Security office.
>She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You
>might have gotten disability, too.'
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high
>school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady
>swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
>
>My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
>'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I
>understand she took to drinking right after we split
>up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been
>sober since.'
>'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person
>could go on celebrating that long?'
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some
>reason, took my order first.
>"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."
>He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""
>Nah, she can order for herself."
>And then the fight started...
>
>******************************************
>A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom
>mirror.
>She is not happy with what she sees and says to her
>husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
>I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
>The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near
>perfect.'
>And then the fight started.....
>
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