Evenif you speak the language, the culture is vastly different than that of the West, and the more conservative and non-direct nature of the general public (as I explained in my Honne and Tatemae post) may cause you to shy away from dating in fear of coming off too strong or offending someone.
That said, these apps are also great for meeting people in general, be it for platonic relationships, workout buddies, or hobby enthusiasts, and can provide you with a vast network of people from all walks of life, raising your chances of finding someone who completes you.
Tinder is arguably the most popular dating app in Japan. In fact, the app is about much more than hookups or finding romantic partners: Japanese people also commonly use Tinder for finding friends and people of similar interests as well!
Omiai is one of the safest platforms possible, as it takes your data from your Facebook and Apple ID accounts, and you even need to get a government-issued ID approved by the app in order to sign up. So, to say that no catfishing is allowed on Omiai would be an understatement.
On OkCupid, also known as JapanCupid in Japan, in addition to having a regular profile with your pictures, age, and personal information, you also have your answers to quizzes you take inside the app.
Essentially, the app provides you with countless quizzes and questionnaires about various topics such as lifestyle, sex, personal views, politics, and even morale and ethics. You just pick the questions that you think are important to you, fill out your answers, and feature them on your profile for others to view. Simple as that!
Similar to Tinder, OkCupid also has a large dating pool, and the app even has a strong user base in the LGBTQI+ community, as there are many people of different orientations and genders looking for love.
The apps I shared so far can also work well for those who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, and for people of other queer identities and orientations. Options like Tinder and OkCupid are relatively accommodating toward the LGBTQI+ community, and many gay people use them to find romantic relationships, hookups, or even friendships.
These apps provide more specific search criteria and have much more accommodating categories and profile options for queer people. Most importantly, they provide a safe space for people who may not feel comfortable going on mixed dating apps, where the majority of the users are heterosexual people.
Just like 9Monsters, HER also provides users with a safe online dating experience, as the makers of the app are aware that some members of its community may not want to be open to the public. So, you can use the app safely without showing your face in your public profile, too.
With over 10 million users, Pairs is the most used Japanese-oriented dating app in Japan. However, OkCupid, Tinder and Bumble are the most used among foreigners in Japan. As for gay dating, 9Monsters is the most used app among gay and/or trans men, while HER is the most used app among queer-identifying women and non-gender-conforming people.
The first topic we agreed to write about is dating. Specifically, dating Japanese people in Japan. Kayo wrote her piece from the perspective of an outgoing, independent, and overall badass Japanese lady. Be sure to check it out here.
Then there is language. Japanese language is extremely high context, and the level of mastery you need for a healthy, fulfilling relationship goes far beyond what you need with friends or for business.
Naturally, people who feel exhausted with their lives in Japan figure the grass must be greener at the chalet. Usually you can tell when during the first few dates, your romantic interest asks you how long before you plan to go home, and how wonderful it must be to live abroad.
The most famous is the go-kon (合コン), which is basically a group first date. Many Japanese people are nervous of just meeting one-on-one, so instead they meet two-on-two, or three-on-three. A group of single ladies will meet with a group of single men, and couples will be formed.
I was also surprised by how many couples are formed within companies. Japanese employment is usually for life, so the company can be a second family. When you spend most of your time with colleagues, romance will naturally ensue.
Sadly, sometimes declarations fail. If she friendzones you, tough luck. On the bright side, you get to use one of my favorite Japanese phrases, furareta (振られた, meaning to get rejected)! Might as well turn it into a learning experience.
Also, as you say in your blog post: Speaking the local language really opens up lots of more possibilities. In China most people either speak very poor English, or (for the vast majority) do not speak any English at all.
The truth is (this is my gut feeling, you may challenge me on that ? ) about 95% of the woman will never consider dating a foreigner, about 5% would date both and then there is this tiny tiny fraction of women (actually significantly less than 1%) that will
exclusively target foreigners. They have the same weird motives of mixed blood child and this BS and some want to leave China ( a lot of Chinese people are not very happy with their lives).
Additionally, due to this stupid one child policy and the fact that still to this date women are considered as the inferior gender, men significantly outnumber the women. So there is a shortage of women especially in rural
areas. However, while men tend to stay at home the women tend to move into the big cities. Therefore in cities like Shanghai and Shenzhen women outnumber men a little bit.
Due to these circumstances foreigners (applies only to males) are considered to be stealing Chinese women while women that date a foreigner are considered inferior and therefore dating a foreigner gets a pretty bad touch.
1. Some girls will want to fuck/date/bfgf because you are white. These tend to be 1-3s/10 with the occasional cute party girl, but these girls are low not just because of looks but they will have the worst personalities. Girls that like you for being white, black, American- these girls are the bottom of the barrel, girls that japanese guys tend to not like (its no wonder they suddenly quit and turn to foreigners).
I can 100% confirm this experience. In Tokyo it is easy to get with women, but remember there are over 40 million people living in that area. In reality there are not that many women interested in dating a foreigner, especially high quality women.
Is it just me, or does this sound like a series of additional hurdles for these poor souls to have to go through? The commenters in the article were absolutely correct- surely there are better measures to help this kind of thing?
Typical Japanese way to overcomplicate things and then wonder why it hasn't succeeded. Why would people willingly give up so much personal info and be pressured to get married? So what's next, you get kicked out of the app if you've met 3 people and still haven't picked a mating partner?
Hahaha... I laughed a lot when I read this. Knowing it'll be a government app it won't work, for starters. Then they'll ask you to hook it up to your MyNumber card if they ever get it off the ground.... I mean, if you're able to input your information, switching between zenkakumoji and hankaku, plus entering a bunch of PINs sent to addresses that need verifying by checking the app, which you can't submit to without the PIN. And we all know how great the government is with private information, too. The only reasons I didn't laugh harder at this was, a) they are using our taxes for this, b) they are doing this instead of taking actual measures to increase the desire to find a partner and possibly create a family. Reinstitute tax breaks for families? Nah... let's make a government dating app!
Users will be required to submit paperwork that they are single and looking to get married... if you're not laughing then you should join these politicians. Typical Japanese political disassociation with reality. I'd run for PM in Japan but I'm not Japanese. Japanese women just don't want the BS role that many men expect them to act out now a days. With all the social media and advanced communications women are not communicating. I think Japan may need to close its borders again for 200 years. Go back to a Feudal system and live off of what can be produced domestically. Women were pretty tough back in the day... as much as you might think men ruled them, I believe women had power too... but behind the scenes. That is how women rule... they work together with unwritten rules that rule men. So pick your century.... this one is all screwed up.
I literally was looking at the picture of the two Pikachu's on the top page and reading the title of this article and automatically thinking they were related, and expected to see the smiling Pikachu's when I clicked the article.
Willing to get married (only if they can find the right partner), that doesn't mean anyone can force them to marry and have babies. Some people they just choose to live together. JGovt solution always have dissociation with reality.
I've never used dating apps and am clueless about them. Is "I want to get married and have babies" much of a thing on them? I presume that is the theme of this one, not "I looking for fun" or "look at how attractive I am".
If it guarantees that the other person is single and has the salary they claim they do, this app could be more reassuring for women. As a man, my fear with a commercial dating app would be it wasting my time and screwing money out of me by charging me for chats with an AI "woman". Ashley Madison had a tiny number of actual women users, so this is not a baseless fear.
The demographic change is coming and it CANNOT be stopped. The good news is, it is going to affect all modern developed countries and Japan can get a head start on it before China, Russia, Italy, and the others! What they need to be doing is not hosing money at trying to avoid the demographic collapse, but invest the funds in things that will be beneficial after the collapse. Maybe Japan will have to allow very limited amounts of immigration to soften the blow whilst also investing in more automation.
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