Seen On The Net

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Mark Jones

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Dec 26, 2017, 11:26:22 PM12/26/17
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A new thread for amusing things seen on the net. In my case, usually on Tumblr. First up:

A Statistics teacher in Gotham makes a graph comparing times when Bruce Wayne goes on long vacations with times Batman gets beaten up really badly by villains to illustrate to his class how correlation does not equal causation.

Well, obviously Bruce Wayne wouldn’t want to be in Gotham when Batman is in recovery and can’t protect the city. Duh!

And that’s how “The Coward Bruce Wayne” became an incredibly popular Gotham meme

Mark Jones

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Feb 7, 2018, 12:29:20 AM2/7/18
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So since Mark Hamill is the king of voicing amazing evil characters, I have the headcanon that after the Battle of Endor part of Luke’s job for the alliance was making voice calls to various moffs and other ranking imperials pretending to be a recording of the Emperor saying THEY were in charge of the Empire if he died and letting the infighting speed up the imperial collapse. 


Luke: Urgh, Leia, do I really have to do this?


Leia: I’m sorry Luke, you’re just too good at sounding evil.


Luke: Fiiiiine. *puts on incredibly evil voice* Hello, Grand Moff…


Han: *whispers* That is just freaky.


Chewie: *nods*



Mark Jones

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Feb 13, 2018, 6:44:39 PM2/13/18
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A CGI recreation of the opening of the Heavy Metal movie (corvette reentry from space shuttle)

https://vimeo.com/108869209?ref=fb-share&1


Mark Jones

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Jun 24, 2018, 5:21:46 PM6/24/18
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Pepper Potts, Iron Man's assistant-turned-CEO of Stark Industries, has killed ELEVEN PERCENT of the main villains in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Here's the math:
There have been 19 MCU films to date.
Loki was the main antagonist in Thor 1 and Avengers 1, so 18 main villains.
Pepper killed Obadian Stane in Iron Man 1 with the ARC reator.
Pepper killed Aldritch Killian in Iron Man 3 ("Wow. That was really violent.")
That's 2 out of 18, or 1 out of 9, or 11% of the main villains.
For a non-superhero, she's pretty badass.
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Mark Jones

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Jan 20, 2019, 10:39:10 PM1/20/19
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You’re a regular office worker born with the ability to “see” how dangerous a person is with a number scale of 1-10 above their heads. A toddler would be a 1, while a skilled soldier with a firearm may score a 7. Today, you notice the reserved new guy at the office measures a 10.

You decide it’s best to find out what you can about this person. Cautiously, you approach his desk. He’s a handsome man, tall, but with a disarming smile. How could such a friendly guy with such cute, dorky glasses be dangerous?

You extend your hand. “I noticed you’re new here. What’s your name?”

He shakes your hand warmly. His gaze is piercing, as if he’s looking right through you. “The name’s Clark,” he says. “So, how long have you worked for the Daily Planet?”

This one wins.

It’s been a few weeks, and one of Clark’s friends shows up.  She’s pretty and all, enough muscle that she must work out.  First thought would be that she should be maybe a 6.

Clark’s introducing her around.  “This is my good friend, Diana, she’s in from out of town.”

You blink, and take a step back in fear.  You’ve never seen an 11 before.

The day Bruce Wayne shows up for his long promised interview with Lois Lane, you can’t help it, the mug your holding drops from your fingers and sends a shock of hot coffee and ceramic shards across the floor.

Clark stops a few feet away and squints at you worriedly from behind those ridiculous glasses you’re 99% sure he doesn’t actually need, and asks tentatively, “Everything all right?”

You ignore him in favor of staring at the inky dark numerals hovering over the beaming fool gesticulating some fantastic yacht story for a gaggle of secretaries and minor columnists.

That’s it. Your gift has officially gone haywire. There is no other explanation. Because there is absolutely no way that Brucie Wayne is a 10.

At this point, you’ve seen it all. Miled manner reporters and billionaires at a 10 and a model-like woman at 11. You were really starting to doubt your power. The day you really stopped believeing in it was when Bruce Wayne came for another visit, and this time with a kid. The kid couldn’t be more than 10 years old, a bit on the short side.

He was an 8.

The day you started believing in it again was when you saw on tv the formation of something called the justice league.

There were those same numbers over superman, batman, wonder woman and robin. That’s when you put two and two together. You wonder how nobody at the daily planet noticed that Clarke was Superman with glasses. You wonder why you didn’t notice. You wonder why nobody put two and two together that Diana Prince and Wonder Woman looked exactly the same. You look in the mirror as the realization hit you and you see your own number change from a 3 to a 9.

Mark Jones

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May 4, 2019, 2:24:01 AM5/4/19
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https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/xykkkd/why-american-farmers-are-hacking-their-tractors-with-ukrainian-firmware?utm_source=reddit.com

US farmers in the midwest are hacking their John Deere tractors with illegally-cracked firmware from Eastern Europe.

Yes, just in time for 2020, it's CYBERPUNK HARVESTERS!

John Deere makes tractor purchasers sign licensing agreements forbidding them from doing their own updates, upgrades, repairs or modifications--essentially, maintaining control over how the tractor is used even though they "sold" it to the farmer.

The farmers are rebelling, hacking their tractors with firmware that lets them control their own property.

Gotham

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May 4, 2019, 12:53:44 PM5/4/19
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 This is crazy but they are trying to do this with everything lately including maintaining cars.
1_lrNSR8-INOLgS2ApMR-5gA.png

Mark Jones

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May 4, 2019, 9:39:02 PM5/4/19
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Taken from a friend of a friend.


This friend of mine has been very consciously raising her young daughter outside of stereotypical gender norms. They’ve done quite a number on my friend, and she’s like, “Nope, my kid’s life will be different.”

Her daughter is small for her age, and will probably remain small. This has affected her self-confidence. Earlier this year, my friend decided to tell her daughter a slightly sanitized version of Arya Stark’s journey in GoT, to basically demonstrate how a small girl could learn to be badass.


Six months go by, and the daughter turns from 5 to 6. Her mom asks her what she wants for her birthday. The daughter says, “I want to learn how to fight.” So my friend, who has zero martial arts experience, looks up a place, and they go there.


The moment they get there, my friend is thinking, “This may not be the right place.” It’s a Krav Maga/MMA gym. Lots of burly dudes beating the crap out of each other, basically. Not your kid-friendly karate dojo.

But she doesn’t want to tell her daughter that they have to leave because the place is filled with intimidating men – it would pretty much fly in the face of everything she’s trying to teach her. So she says, “Okay. I don’t know if they have a kid’s class here. Why don’t you go ask who the teacher is, and then ask them?”


So her daughter walks up to one dude, asks for the teacher, then gets pointed to this tattooed, musclebound dude with his head shaved and a goatee. As my friend put, “The guy looked like your bigger, meaner younger brother.”


She trails behind her kid a bit, ready to step in, and listens in. Her daughter walks up the guy and says, “Hi! Do you have classes for kids? I want to learn how to fight.”


The guy looks down at this wee little girl, and he says, “Uh, well, no, we don’t really. Maybe I can talk to your mom and suggest some places for you? This isn’t really a place for little girls.”


Her daughter reaches into her jacket pocket, pulls out a nickel, holds it out to the guy and says, “Valar morghulis.”


The guy takes the nickel, looks at it, then says, totally deadpan: “Valar dohaeris. Of course I can teach you.”


The mom comes over and says, “I thought you said you didn’t have kid’s classes?” The guy says, “We do now. Come into the office and we’ll work up a training schedule.” The mom: “Do you have any idea how much it’ll cost?” The guy holds up the nickel. “She’s already paid up.”



Chris B

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May 4, 2019, 10:19:30 PM5/4/19
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Awesome story, Mark.  I gues that was a Game of Thrones conversation, but it shows how deep nerdom runs.

 - Chris

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Gotham

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May 4, 2019, 11:09:08 PM5/4/19
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 Next up is Cersei and she might even kill off the dragon queen.
I love that story.
See - even the most vicious shows on TV have morals :)

1556752235820.jpg

Mark Jones

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May 19, 2019, 2:57:37 AM5/19/19
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Mark Jones

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Jun 4, 2019, 4:31:28 PM6/4/19
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Theory: Nobody who writes a physics textbook gives any fucks

Evidence:

colonelmagpie Deactivated

Update: Legolas’ pupils are about 3.5 cm wide each. Now drawing kawaii Legolas on physics assignment.

And they told you science was no fun.

colonelmagpie Deactivated

Science!

colonelmagpie Deactivated

I’m going to do it. I’m going to hand it in.

Legolas’s pupil size isn’t the problem here, though. 5 leagues is 17.262 miles. The curvature of the Earth means that for a person of average height, the visual horizon is less than three miles away. Even if your vision is telescopic and the atmosphere is perfectly clear, you can’t see around the planet. If they were standing on a hill, it would have to be at LEAST 198 feet above sea level in order to see the horizon at 17.2 miles away, with nothing tall in between. Which, knowing Rohan, isn’t impossible.

But consider: Elven satellite eyeballs.

you mean like

ontologicalidiot Deactivated

@sidereanuncia it’s back, the post that I can only imagine haunts your nightmares 

I shall never find peace. 

Also, for what it’s worth, there’s absolutely no reason to believe that the curvature of Middle Earth is the same as that of Earth.

There’s no evidence that Middle Earth curves.

Yeah there is.  The Silmarillion states that the world was curved after the fall of Numenor (I believe), preventing access to Valinor.  But Elves (among others) can travel the straight path across it.

So middle earth is round, but not for Elves because magic.

So wait, the reason he can see that far is because Elves just have the ability to ignore the curve of the earth? That’s awesome. It also means that no matter how good your optics got, you would always want elf eyes manning the spyglass because they can see arbitrarily far while everybody else is limited by this ‘horizon’ bullshit.

lady-of-greenwood Deactivated

Oh thank God, my poor elf prince has seen too much in this post

a-bore-of-a-whore Deactivated

Elves are flat-earthers

This post went from amusing to horrifying, to be brought back down to amusing, sprinkled in with some cannon explanation, and then you leave me here in fucking outrage

This post really was a rollercoaster.

odinoco Deactivated

 For the elves it was a straight line.

Mark Jones

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Jun 4, 2019, 4:33:36 PM6/4/19
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There’s no evidence that Middle Earth curves.

Yeah there is.  The Silmarillion states that the world was curved after the fall of Numenor (I believe), preventing access to Valinor.  But Elves (among others) can travel the straight path across it.

So middle earth is round, but not for Elves because magic.

So wait, the reason he can see that far is because Elves just have the ability to ignore the curve of the earth? That’s awesome. It also means that no matter how good your optics got, you would always want elf eyes manning the spyglass because they can see arbitrarily far while everybody else is limited by this ‘horizon’ bullshit.

lady-of-greenwood Deactivated

Oh thank God, my poor elf prince has seen too much in this post

a-bore-of-a-whore Deactivated

Elves are flat-earthers

This post went from amusing to horrifying, to be brought back down to amusing, sprinkled in with some cannon explanation, and then you leave me here in fucking outrage

This post really was a rollercoaster.

odinoco Deactivated

for elves it was a straight line

Chris B

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Jun 4, 2019, 4:59:05 PM6/4/19
to Mark Jones, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
This is a really funny conversation.  I like how Elf eyes can either see through the globe or they are like Gungan eye.  maybe Gungans are decedents of elves.

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Ian Sheadel

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Jun 4, 2019, 5:19:14 PM6/4/19
to Chris B, Mark Jones, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
The very last message was a perfect closer to bookend this whole discussion.

~Ian

To view this discussion on the web visit https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/champions-of-the-northwest/CAL0d_S8rEu38HefyhOo-gzsb-ZR-Sz_3W21iwSrQHHUHC%2BSSJA%40mail.gmail.com.

Chris B

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Jun 4, 2019, 6:44:23 PM6/4/19
to Ian Sheadel, Mark Jones, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Actually, I think this was a power that Dante had.  That stupid elf could literally see through buildings miles away and teleport there... with the team's armored personnel carrier... loaded wit the Guardians...  jack ass!

Gotham

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Jun 4, 2019, 7:00:44 PM6/4/19
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 Don't hate the player hate the game. 

Dante was an extremely well rounded character. 
Didn't do much damage but give him enough time and he could figure out a way to kill...I mean defeat almost anyone.

Chris B

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Jun 4, 2019, 7:10:14 PM6/4/19
to Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Dante was extremely effective, just like all of your characters.  😁

He has that area of attack auto-punch that did low damage, but hit everyone in a 12 mile radius, and three of those attacks brought down most enemies.  Then, he would gather everyone up, make them dance, and teleport the lot into the villain's "secret lair" he was able to see into from halfway across the city. 🙄

Evil character for the GM.


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Gotham

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Jun 4, 2019, 7:20:25 PM6/4/19
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Secret lair -> international waters -> no laws = Dante's justice.

Chris B

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Jun 4, 2019, 7:34:02 PM6/4/19
to Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest

On Tue, Jun 4, 2019 at 4:20 PM Gotham <portlan...@gmail.com> wrote:

 Dante's justice.

What a great title for an episode!


Message has been deleted

Chris B

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Jun 8, 2019, 3:30:29 PM6/8/19
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Medevac Membership Report.pdf

Mark Jones

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Jun 16, 2019, 1:03:24 AM6/16/19
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Gotham

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Jun 16, 2019, 1:09:27 AM6/16/19
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This bridge looks worse than my office.
Give me the STNG bridge. 

Chris B

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Jun 16, 2019, 1:28:50 AM6/16/19
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Can you see Sulu grabbing that little steering wheel and going Speed Racer with the Enterprise?  LOL!

Where doee the TAO (Tactical Action officer) sit and where is the damn coffee pot?!

On Sat, Jun 15, 2019 at 10:09 PM Gotham <portlan...@gmail.com> wrote:
This bridge looks worse than my office.
Give me the STNG bridge. 

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Mark Jones

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Jun 20, 2019, 10:25:03 PM6/20/19
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Guys builds the "FRIENDS" set in Far Cry 5--and then runs around punching out the Friends to their theme song....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIvHR1oxMA4


Gotham

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Jun 20, 2019, 10:38:21 PM6/20/19
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I'm probably one of the few that has never seen this show.

Mark Jones

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Jun 20, 2019, 10:52:24 PM6/20/19
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Instructional video for pilots named Steve (Steve Rogers, Steve Trevor)....

Chris B

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Jun 24, 2019, 8:35:55 PM6/24/19
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THIS is why The Sentinels need a good accountant!!!!!!!!!


LOL!

Gotham

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Jun 24, 2019, 9:10:55 PM6/24/19
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Best part. What type of property taxes do you have.
"It's a fort..a cabin. A big cabin"
"Where is this located"
"It's off the grid"
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that"
LOL!

Just let Batman do your damn taxes Superman. Stop trying to have Superboy as a dependent :)

Mark Jones

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Jun 26, 2019, 12:21:37 AM6/26/19
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Who will win? Russian Spetznaz soldiers or one very angry architect?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcCIGu69Uxo


Mark Jones

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Jul 4, 2019, 2:31:40 AM7/4/19
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Chris B

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Jul 4, 2019, 7:15:50 PM7/4/19
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On Wednesday, July 3, 2019 at 11:31:40 PM UTC-7, Mark Jones wrote:

Looks like Florida to me! :P

On a side note, I love the header of the guy's blog (NSFW may contain...) LOL!  Nice job, Mark.

Chris B

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Jul 23, 2019, 12:14:49 PM7/23/19
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This Cyberpunk wallpaper / clock / music looks awesome!

Gotham

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Jul 24, 2019, 11:38:17 PM7/24/19
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I like the cyberpunk display. Good music for building up to a combat.

Mark Jones

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Jul 25, 2019, 1:46:19 AM7/25/19
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Pineapple pizza.jpg


Chris B

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Jul 25, 2019, 1:44:46 PM7/25/19
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On Wednesday, July 24, 2019 at 10:46:19 PM UTC-7, Mark Jones wrote:

Pineapple pizza.jpg



Wow.  It looks like the Saturday game is about to get deep!  I fear for your players...

Kenn Durrence

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Jul 25, 2019, 2:17:58 PM7/25/19
to Chris B, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
I side with the Italians on this one...Might have to turn a blind eye...

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Gotham

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Jul 25, 2019, 2:33:11 PM7/25/19
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Pizza only needs 3 things. Bread, cheese and MEAT!


Kenn Durrence

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Jul 25, 2019, 2:38:23 PM7/25/19
to Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Sauce helps. Just sayin'

On Thu, Jul 25, 2019 at 11:33 AM Gotham <portlan...@gmail.com> wrote:
Pizza only needs 3 things. Bread, cheese and MEAT!


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Gotham

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Aug 13, 2019, 11:54:03 AM8/13/19
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This just screams lunatic with powers. Would fit nicely in Gotham. 



 

Chris B

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Aug 13, 2019, 12:08:51 PM8/13/19
to Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
On Tue, Aug 13, 2019 at 8:54 AM Gotham <portlan...@gmail.com> wrote:
This just screams lunatic with powers. Would fit nicely in Gotham. 



This is how everyone got their television sets, so the Jim Carey Riddler could take over their minds!!!

Mark Jones

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Aug 14, 2019, 12:56:59 AM8/14/19
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Video evidence is rapidly losing all credibility. Watch this video of an old David Letterman interview with Bill Haid.

When Bill impersonates Tom Cruise, they're using DeepFakes tech to actually shift his face and voice to match Tom Cruise. It's subtle--but creepy as hell.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWrhRBb-1Ig


Gotham

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Aug 14, 2019, 1:33:30 PM8/14/19
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Eventually video will no long be used in courts as being tampered with is that much more difficult to spot. 
The only evidence that will hold up in court will be such things as DNA left at the scene or finding the weapon and body. 

Call in Splicer the DNA collector lol. 

Chris B

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Aug 14, 2019, 3:21:48 PM8/14/19
to Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Don't call Splicer!  He'll horde the DNA for himself! 😉

Splicer needs the Disguise skill bought as a power, then he can use the DNA samples to change his face, voice, and (maybe even() body to mimic other people.  That would be glori... disturbing, actually.

Mark Jones

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Sep 1, 2019, 3:58:26 AM9/1/19
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The ending credits of PORTAL include a song by Jonathan Coulter, "Still Alive."

It's sung by GLaDOS, the passive-aggressively homicidal AI putting you thru your paces in the game. Since you supposedly killed GLaDOS in the final scene of the game, this was a hint that PORTAL 2 (featuring GLaDOS) was coming.


This is another version by an orchestra that does big arrangements of video games: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IS8J4ex6Uc&list=LLljuwiEsVCRfmBG3-TJFGLQ&index=1

And this...this is a Big Band Arrangement with a Frank Sinantra-esque Singer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22vbhTi1ieI&list=LLljuwiEsVCRfmBG3-TJFGLQ&index=2

What a world we live in.... 

Gotham

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Sep 2, 2019, 12:22:36 PM9/2/19
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This game looks pretty good. I'll have to play it sometime.

Ian Sheadel

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Sep 3, 2019, 11:54:45 AM9/3/19
to John B., CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
I love that song, fun new versions Mark!  And yes the Portal games are very fun and distinctive.  You'll have a great time with that Chris.

~Ian

On Mon, Sep 2, 2019, 9:22 AM Gotham <portlan...@gmail.com> wrote:
This game looks pretty good. I'll have to play it sometime.

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Kane Powers

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Sep 25, 2019, 5:14:15 PM9/25/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
 Some Batmath for those who are into DC/Batman :)
Screenshot_20190925-135527.jpg

Kane Maximus

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Sep 29, 2019, 7:49:47 PM9/29/19
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"The combines stories make this really long. 
 - The first three pages are the setup
 - the next five (4-8) is the Arkham parts
 - the remaining 15 pages (8-23) are the surprise trip."
 



I so thought of you Chris when I saw this come across my phone. 



1569782477076.jpg

Chris B

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Sep 29, 2019, 9:28:45 PM9/29/19
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LOL, okay, I get the hint.  BUT!  At least I haven't written full novels about my characters, right Mark? 😉

I so thought of you Chris when I saw this come across my phone. 😂



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Mark Jones

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Oct 3, 2019, 1:20:58 AM10/3/19
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AU with Dick as Nightwing and Jason as Flamebird in adulthood. Jason’s costume is the black and red version of Dick’s usual black and blue Nightwing costume, but with Jason’s own personal touches like his brown jacket, etc.

And they’re all purpose vigilantes like the rest of the Batfamily, but they have their own additional focus specific to them: protecting abused children. Dick’s focus is more geared towards juvie and state sanctioned child housing, while Jason’s is more towards domestic abuse, but both have the same reputation: children in Gotham and Bludhaven know that Nightwing and Flamebird have eyes and ears everywhere, and that if it’s not safe to go to the adults in their life to report their abuse, just leave a signal for the brothers - their version of the Batsignal, specifically spread through Gotham schools via whispered rumors specifically for this.

Just draw in chalk or spray paint on the wall of your building the brothers’ symbol of a V shaped raptor (like on the front of their costumes) and once word of it reaches them via their network of kids keeping an eye out for those marks or Oracle sees it via one of her plentiful cameras, the brothers will come and figure out a way to help you.

It doesn’t have to be big or garish or eye catching, and soon the buildings of both cities, from low rent tenement buildings to wealthy mansions and juvie centers and even schools are dotted with small red and blue V shapes that most adults just dismiss as graffiti homages to the vigilantes known to have a soft spot for kids in particular.

Never recognizing them for the cries for help they are, because if there’s one thing the children of Gotham and Bludhaven guard zealously, it’s the secret of the red and blue birds in flight. It’s not a thing for adults, it’s just for them, and they never know when they might be the one who needs Nightwing and Flamebird to come and believe them.

Because that’s the power of their symbol - no matter who you are, who your parents are, if you send it they will come.

And they will believe you.

And Dick and Jason had their hopes for this, when they first conceived this idea and put it in motion. It was slow to catch on at first - hesitant - but they kept pushing it, kept making examples of the abusers they caught in ways sure to catch the attention of those who needed to see the message they were sending: the kids who had heard the rumor of what happens if you put up the brothers’ symbol, but weren’t sure if it was real, were afraid to hope.

And then, like snow rolling down a mountainside, it picks up steam. Becomes a movement in plurality rather than a singular motion. An avalanche. Birds rising up on the sides of many-storied buildings, reaching for the sky, desperate for freedom. It isn’t long before Dick and Jason are swamped, too many signals appearing and only two of them.

Doesn’t matter though. They made this their crusade for a reason. It needed doing. And they’ll keep doing it as long as it needs to be done.

But then a curious thing starts to happen.

An older boy happens to notice this scrawny kid in his building painstakingly drawing the symbol in chalk in the alley hardly anyone ever walks down unless they’re desperate. Casually watches which apartment the kid goes back inside to, recognizes it as one he hears a lot of yelling coming out of at all hours of the day - he heard some gossip in the lobby once, older neighbors clucking their tongues about the guy in that apartment getting laid off a couple months ago. The next time he sees the kid hanging out on the front steps of the building, almost like he’s trying to delay going inside as long as possible, he stops his buddies and invites the kid to come join their basketball game, as long as he doesn’t need to be anywhere any time soon. They tend to play all day.

A middle school teacher offers to give one of his students a little extra help after school, some one on one time to help her really get the hang of those equations she’s having a hard time with. She hesitates, thinks about the red bird someone spraypainted below one of the classroom’s windows last month. Thanks him politely, but says she’s going to ask her dad for help with it at home.

A blue bird is scrawled into the floor of the boys’ locker room at a Gotham high school when the wrestling team comes in to get changed for practice one day. They all look thrown by it, glancing around at each other and clearly wondering if it was any one of them who put it there, or someone from another team, maybe a football player. They know what it means though, and the atmosphere in that locker room is a little quieter, the rest of the week, a little more subdued. Less jokes of a certain nature, some of them visibly hesitating before making a joke that seems less funny now that they’re not sure if one of their buddies might perceive it entirely differently. Some of them start to ask each other one on one, whispered in private, in confidence, like….hey, you know like, if something like that ever did happen, you could totally tell me right? You know I’d have your back, right?

Some kids happen to notice one of the houses on their bus route has what looks like a bird scratched into a windowsill. They start to pay a little closer attention to the kid who comes out of that house each day, to join them on the bus. Notice some bruises they never thought twice about before, they’ve seen him getting his ass kicked on the playground and figured that was where they were from. And in time one, two, three even four different students have pulled aside a teacher to say they’re kinda worried about a particular classmate, even if they don’t mention why. She starts to pay closer attention as well.

Because see, the real power of heroes has always been in their symbols. In the examples they set. And the children of Gotham and Bludhaven have always had voices - they just needed to know there was someone out there willing to listen, before speaking up….where more than just the two Birds themselves might be around to hear.

And after all, kids saving kids. Kids saving each other. Kids saving themselves.

That’s always been the power of Robins.



Mark Jones

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Oct 3, 2019, 1:33:32 AM10/3/19
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the funniest thing to do as an older sibling is to add an ‘s’ onto shit your younger sibling plays. “Oh, you’re playing pokemons? you’re booting up fortnites on the switch? skyrims?” because it’s the closest thing humans have to a rage spell lmao

OP you are missing the power of “the.” As in “the pokey-man” or “the fortnite.” Hell, I just say “the Costco” and everyone around me loses their shit.

Once you’re over the age of 30 you can put these two hands together and instantly deal out 15 points of psychic damage to anyone under the age of 21 within hearing range



Kane Maximus

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Oct 4, 2019, 12:04:30 PM10/4/19
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 I hope everyone has the perfect miniature for the game this Sunday. 
1570197626311.jpg

Patrick Swann

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Oct 4, 2019, 4:09:22 PM10/4/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Mine are on order and should be delivered by the second session.

Mark Jones

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Oct 6, 2019, 2:28:28 AM10/6/19
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going through my microsoft word archives is great fun because i always find the wildest shit in there and by “the wildest shit” i mean the time i tried to rewrite the entire bible from scratch at the age of eleven and a half:


“And so Adam and Eve were cast out of the Garden of Eden, and Eve turned to Adam and said, 'Nice going, loser.‘”


"Eve," said God in a terrible voice, "Hast thou eaten of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge?" 

"The snake told me do it," Eve said, pointing at the snake, which was starting to look like it would rather be anywhere else."


And God said, "Cain! What hast thou done? Thou hast slain thy beloved brother!"

And Cain replied with dignity, "He is resting."

And God said to Cain, "Thou art cursed among mankind. Begone!"

And Cain went away, and God went away also. And Abel remained where he was and attracted flies.


"Oh Lord!" cried the people of the earth as the waters rose higher. "Why hast thou sent this flood to kill us?"

And God said, "Because you suck!"

And the people of the earth said, "Do we?"

And God said, "Yes."

Chris B

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Oct 6, 2019, 12:48:46 PM10/6/19
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This was the best ever, Mark!  Thank you for the great laugh!!  I needed it this morning.

I would love to read the rest of it, because it's true!

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Chris B

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Oct 9, 2019, 12:22:10 AM10/9/19
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And now you can actually see this live this February!

Kane Maximus

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Oct 12, 2019, 11:10:32 AM10/12/19
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They finally had Superboy appear in Titans last night! 
They had him escaping Dr. Helix....Errr...I mean Cadmus cloning facility. Superboy is project number 12. I guess they didn't get the memo from Helix saying he should have been project #7 hehe.
Even Superboy's dog is there - Krypto. 
Doggie laser eyes and all.

Titans-Season-1-Krypto-01-850x491.jpg

Mark Jones

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Oct 13, 2019, 10:12:57 PM10/13/19
to Kane Maximus, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
THIS is an example of using your Acrobatics skill to increase your MOVE score in combat.

Acrobatic Stair Leap.gif


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Chris B

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Oct 13, 2019, 11:03:52 PM10/13/19
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Can't tell if he made his Breakfall roll at the end!

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Mark Jones

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Oct 13, 2019, 11:06:10 PM10/13/19
to Chris B, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Well, he rolled to his feet and continued running, so I'd say yes he made it. Otherwise, he'd have lain there stunned (or at least CON stunned) for a bit.


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Kane Maximus

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Oct 14, 2019, 12:32:01 PM10/14/19
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I would say he did a roll with the punch maneuver then did a break fall to stand up 😸

Chris B

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Oct 17, 2019, 6:36:24 PM10/17/19
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Kane Maximus

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Oct 17, 2019, 6:48:27 PM10/17/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
"You all start in the bar..." Classic start point.

I'll pay you 500 gold each but yet amazon.com is there and someone uses a taser? What time period of D&D is this?

The excuse why not to get the local authorities is it's Halloween lol. 

Chris B

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Oct 17, 2019, 6:52:14 PM10/17/19
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Dungeons & Dragons = Generic Roleplaying Game system.

They do a lot of skits like this to highlight silliness in our society.  They have a whole run of skits on Florida lol.  Go Gators!!! 😝



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Chris B

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Oct 18, 2019, 9:10:47 PM10/18/19
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A couple of videos:

1) This is what happens with Splicer (and Dr Helix) on the loose!




2) Don't get hot and bothered!





Mark Jones

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Oct 19, 2019, 3:47:57 AM10/19/19
to Chris B, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest

Mark Jones

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Oct 19, 2019, 8:54:18 PM10/19/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
I need one of these. Maybe even two!

Atzec Death Whistle--sounds like screaming

Chris B

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Oct 19, 2019, 9:58:08 PM10/19/19
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Dare I ask, why do you need a Death Whistle?  😨  😉

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Mark Jones

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Oct 19, 2019, 10:59:07 PM10/19/19
to Chris B, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Are you kidding? Who DOESN'T need one? Think of the fun you could have with it.

Or with a bagful of them. Think of the birthday parties for nieces and nephews.
Think of giving them away on Halloween!


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Patrick Swann

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Oct 19, 2019, 11:11:30 PM10/19/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
You could use them to scare the crap out of those nieces and nephews when they are having a sleep over. Tell them a ghost story involving a screaming specter. Then wait until they are almost asleep and blow one as loud as you can.

Mark Jones

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Oct 21, 2019, 8:53:47 PM10/21/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
This is what ordinary life with superhuman DEX and SPEED is like:  https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/chrissongzzz/186255375393


Kane Maximus

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Oct 25, 2019, 4:44:13 PM10/25/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
This works for D&D/Pathfinder I guess it works good for Champions as well.

Who's base has the med tank?
1572035896876.jpg

Kane Maximus

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Oct 30, 2019, 4:35:56 PM10/30/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest

This was a good read. Police destroyed a house attempting to get someone who stole a shirt and two belts from Walmart. This suspect ran and broke into this house. It took the Police almost a full day after destroying room after room to get to him and arrest him - completely destroying the house. The city owes nothing to the owners of the house as they were attempting to provide protection to the city.

So next time the Superheroes destroy something - always remember to say it was to protect the citizens of the city. 
NEVER EVER SAY - It was eminent domain.



 

AAJzniV.png

Chris B

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Oct 30, 2019, 4:51:49 PM10/30/19
to Kane Maximus, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
This makes me sad.

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Mark Jones

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Nov 2, 2019, 2:42:28 PM11/2/19
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Mark Jones

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Nov 7, 2019, 1:55:56 AM11/7/19
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Flash and Batman Texting.png


Kane Maximus

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Nov 7, 2019, 11:49:45 AM11/7/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Evil villain - 
"I attempt to track Flash's cell phone"
GM - 
"You find him in a coffee shop, no wait now he is in the bank stopping a robbery, no wait now he's over at the bay, now he's...."
Evil villain - 
"Forget it, I attempt to track down Batman's cell phone"
GM - 
"Your phone sparks and melts in your hand."
Evil villain in an upset voice - 
"I just kill lots of people to piss them off"

Chris B

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Nov 20, 2019, 2:45:30 PM11/20/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
A Classic!  back when Star Wars movies were good.




3:06 reminds me of Capt Davidson in the warehouse :D

Kane Maximus

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Nov 20, 2019, 3:02:12 PM11/20/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest

This video explains where Captain Davidson got her training at.

Kane Maximus

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Nov 20, 2019, 3:02:44 PM11/20/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Who are we looking for again? 
I don't know some guy named Duke. LOL

Mark Jones

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Nov 20, 2019, 3:05:55 PM11/20/19
to Kane Maximus, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Wow. That's a classic. I haven't thought about that video in a long, long time.

Yep. "He's trying to escape. Shoot him in the back!"


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Kane Maximus

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Nov 20, 2019, 3:59:06 PM11/20/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
 Easy way to win a Christmas lights contest.
1574283342078.jpg

Chris B

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Nov 20, 2019, 4:14:20 PM11/20/19
to Mark Jones, Kane Maximus, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
On Wed, Nov 20, 2019 at 12:05 PM 'Mark Jones' via CHAMPIONS of the Northwest <champions-of-...@googlegroups.com> wrote:
I haven't thought about that video in a long, long time.

He says with a white beard mirroring Obi Wan talking to Luke 😎


On Wed, Nov 20, 2019 at 12:05 PM 'Mark Jones' via CHAMPIONS of the Northwest <champions-of-...@googlegroups.com> wrote:
Wow. That's a classic. I haven't thought about that video in a long, long time.

Says the guy who is done with Star Wars in all iterations 😝

Kane Maximus

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Nov 20, 2019, 4:16:25 PM11/20/19
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Wow. That's a classic. I haven't thought about that video in a long, long time.

Says the guy who is done with Star Wars in all iterations

Maybe that's why he hasn't seen in in a "long, long time" 
 

He says with a white beard mirroring Obi Wan talking to Luke

You mean Duke? Ah doesn't matter.

Mark Jones

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Nov 29, 2019, 6:10:48 PM11/29/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
In case you ever thought you could climb a tree fast enough to escape a bear. Spoiler: you can't.

https://www.tiktok.com/@jordan_sparkman?refer=embed


Kane Maximus

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Dec 4, 2019, 3:26:57 PM12/4/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Unless you're a Druid then you just talk your way out of it. :) 

Mark Jones

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Dec 7, 2019, 11:45:45 PM12/7/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Now there's something you don't see everyday....

Kane Maximus

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Dec 8, 2019, 2:11:39 AM12/8/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Saw this when you posted it on Oct 19th. 
You must really like this video 

Mark Jones

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Dec 8, 2019, 2:32:40 AM12/8/19
to Kane Maximus, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
It came across my Tumblr feed again tonight. I checked the Seen On The Net thread and didn't see it there, I guess I missed it. So I posted it again.

It's weirdly hypnotic.


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Mark Jones

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Dec 10, 2019, 2:30:08 PM12/10/19
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This one isn't funny, just really interesting. Ethiopian baboons appear to be cooperating with Ethiopian wolves. The wolves wander amongst the baboons during the day, but don't attack them--and are more successful at catching and eating rodents than they are on their own (possibly because the similarly-colored baboons distract the rodents, making them easier to catch). Is this how early humans began domesticating wolves?

Chris B

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Dec 11, 2019, 6:11:00 PM12/11/19
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Ok kids, so here is a little Christmas jingle that -- I think -- fits the Gotham vibe wonderfully.  Enjoy!

<caution, metal ahead>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhLDxRQyhnE&list=RDMhLDxRQyhnE&start_radio

Travelling Gotham

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Dec 15, 2019, 12:01:07 AM12/15/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
It turned out alot more melodic than I expected... Kraumpas is a straight up scary dude!

P.s. Anyone want an access card to the Nike employee store in preparation for their na-na-na-naughty Christmas? I have one I got from work.

Chris B

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Dec 15, 2019, 1:43:29 AM12/15/19
to Travelling Gotham, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
It's a pretty awesome song I stumbled upon. I also like Lacuna Coil. 

Ian, are you able to stop by and say hi tomorrow?

On Sat, Dec 14, 2019, 9:01 PM Travelling Gotham <shead...@gmail.com> wrote:
It turned out alot more melodic than I expected... Kraumpas is a straight up scary dude!

P.s.  Anyone want an access card to the Nike employee store in preparation for their na-na-na-naughty Christmas?  I have one I got from work.

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Ian Sheadel

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Dec 15, 2019, 1:53:00 AM12/15/19
to Chris B, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Yes, actually. That'd be great! 13:00 at Guardian, in some back room?

~Ian

Chris B

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Dec 15, 2019, 1:59:55 AM12/15/19
to Ian Sheadel, CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Yep, we are in the Dungeon Room (in the back by the bathrooms).

Glad you can make it!  If you can stay a bit, bring a current version of Erulim and you can guest star.  He might be in Zion city on a fundraiser or something. 

Otherwise, it will be great to see you for however long you can stay. 

Mark Jones

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Dec 19, 2019, 6:34:40 PM12/19/19
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
This is a link to a reworked movie trailer for DIRTY HARRY, with Arnold Schwarzenegger's face and voice replacing Clint Eastwood. It's spooky. Not perfect...but they're getting better everyday.

Mark Jones

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Jan 17, 2020, 2:48:18 PM1/17/20
to CHAMPIONS of the Northwest
Warrior: I swear I will have revenge for the death of my brother!

Elf: You have my bow!

Dwarf: And my axe!

Necromancer: And your brother!
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