Lulz. Just got it working. Here's my virtualhost .conf file if it helps anyone.
<VirtualHost *:80>
DirectoryIndex index.cfm
ProxyPreserveHost On
RewriteEngine On
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_URI} ^.*/index.cfm/(.*)$ [NC]
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_URI} !^.*/(flex2gateway|jrunscripts|fonts|cfide|cfformgateway|cffileservlet|railo-context|files|images|javascripts|miscellaneous|stylesheets|robots.txt|favicon.ico|sitemap.xml|rewrite.cfm|remote)($|/.*$) [NC]
ErrorLog ${APACHE_LOG_DIR}/error.log
CustomLog ${APACHE_LOG_DIR}/access.log combined
</VirtualHost>