Speech by P.P.Ramachandran ( After serving in the Reserve Bank for forty long years retired at the age of 60)
19-10-2006
LIVING HAPPILY AFTER RETIREMENT
I
am thankful to the Chembur Senior Citizens’ Association for offering me
a chance to be with all of you this evening. I regret that I shall
begin with a funereal reference. Since death is but part of Life I shall
recount this charming story.
In
a tiny village in Kerala, a devout christian breathed his last and the
local priest being out of station, a priest from an adjoining village
was called upon to deliver the funeral oration. “Ladies and Gentlemen”,
began the venerable pastor with the dead body in a coffin before him,
“Here lies dead before me a rare human being of this village with
outstanding qualities. He was a gentleman, a scholar, sweet of tongue,
gentle of temper and very catholic in outlook. He was generous to a
fault and ever smiling”. The widow of the deceased stood up at the end
of the Hall and screamed, “O ! God ! They are burying the wrong man ”.
A
similar doubt can reasonably arise in my wife’s mind about the
qualities of my head and heart eloquently praised by the previous
speaker.
Now, I will revert to the subject allotted to me, “Living Happily After
Retirement”. Retirement is a problem peculiar to our generation. In the
times of our fathers and grandfathers, retirement was not much of a
problem.
There are three reasons for this.
First, Life Expectancy.
Fifty
years ago, the life expectancy at the age of retirement fixed at
55--was 60. A study of Government records revealed that very few people
enjoyed pension for more than five years at that time. Most people died
before sixty and consequently spending five years after retirement did
not pose any major problem. Today
Life Expectancy at retirement at 58 or 60-- is 75 years which means
half of your working life is still left after retirement. To give you an
example two Senior Officers of RBI died at 93 years—35 years after
retirement.
The second reason is the change in the family structure.
Half
a century ago most people were in a joint family. The day you laid down
office, you still had a large family around you. Surely, in a large
family there was always something you could do that was meaningful and
made you feel you were contributing to the family. Today the family has
become nuclear—husband, wife, children. By the time one retires, the
children have gone away. In good old times, daughters used to get
married and promptly go away. Nowadays sons get married and shift on and
for First Night itself ! What is left is the old couple—You for Me and
Me for you. This is not particularly easy to accept and adjust to after
retirement.
The third reason is the problem of “Roots.”
In
halcyon days, people used to have a “native place” and an “ancestral
home”. They looked forward to going there and settling down after
retirement. Today except for Leave Fare Consession purposes, there is
nothing left in terms of native place. People often are confused as to
where to settle.
These
three problems make retirement planning a crucial item. If you have
planned for retirement you can anticipate and tackle these problems.
People are not accustomed to the idea of staying by themselves. If one
asks an audience of prospective retirees and their wives “How many of
you expect to stay after retirement with your children, hardly one hand
goes up. If some husband raises his hand, his wife immediately slaps it
down saying, “I’ll be damned if I am going to stay with my
daughter-in-law!” So it is a tough problem to think about old people
staying—just the two of them. This makes planning all the more
significant.
The most difficult problem that we face after retirement is the psychological one.
When
an executive retires, he is at the peak of his career—his status,
prestige and financial acumen. The moment he lays down office, all these
desert him. He discovers that “Everything becomes Less and Less”. The
first thing he notices is the way his status and prestige are affected.
Even at home, the retired person is no longer the important person. If
he demands of his wife an early breakfast, she will promptly admonish
him, “You are retired now. So take it easy. Let those employed go first
!”. He is no longer “Numero Uno”. A friend of mine who was a Senior
Executive in RBI was getting 500 Greeting Cards and Diaries for the New
Year. After one year of retirement it dwindled to fifty and this year he
got ten. Greeting cards and diaries are surely an indicator of the
respect you are held in.
The most immediate problem on retirement is time-arrangement.
We
all have twenty four hours at our disposal, whether we like it or not.
When you are a Senior Executive you work for ten, twelve or even fifteen
hours and you feel “Suppose I had two hours more how nice it would be!.
Life would be easier.”
After
retirement we have twenty four hours and nothing to do! Result –misery
and this is one thing one likes to spread! No man wants to be miserable
alone. He will make as many people miserable as he can. A man who has
nothing to do will harass people around him. Turning on head the
Benthamite principle of maximization of welfare—maximization of
ill-fare!.
There are two solutions to this problem.
One is to continue to do the same work one was doing at the time of retirement.
The
first option is very convenient but where is such an opportunity for
the majority? There is the temptation to wangle out an extension but
this does lead to compromising principles which many succumb to
regrettably. I have seen Senior Officers accepting jobs as
liaison officers and standing outside the cabin of their subordinates
and seek favours from them. But how long-lasting is the solution. Extension merely postpones the problem. It crops up again quite swiftly.
The second option is to do something different,i.e., option to get another job.
An executive can get another job provided he is willing to sacrifice self-respect. Generally
jobs are given by the previous employer’s suppliers. Cases are legion
where army, navy, air force officers are caught for espionage in such
employment. In commercial organizations Officers are employed to get
orders and collect bills speedily from their erstwhile Employers. So you
will agree that this is no solution.
All
of you are aware that the Bard of Avon-- William Shakespeare wrote of
the “Seven Stages of Man”. Modern psychologists have abridged it to four
and these are thus.
Before finding a girl—Spiderman
After engagement------Superman
10 years after marriage-Watchman
20 years after marriage-Doberman
After
this lighter side I revert to post-retired life. The retired official
is likely to fall into four dysfunctional time options.
The first is “Withdrawal”.
Many
retired people, the day they retire from Office withdraw from Life and
within a few months they just pass away. When you ask a Doctor he will
tell you I can give a Medical term but this is case of “simple lack of
will to live”.
The second time management option is “ritual”.
A
person can create a ritual for himself. He gets up at a specific time,
does different activities at a specific time and this invariably results
in misery for others if that specific time frame is not adhered to.
While he has in essence nothing to do, he is trying to make his
activities meaningful. This leads to a meaningless ritual.
The third option is Pastime.
Many
people get together and embark on a combined ritual which is called
pastime. This too does not add to the meaningfulness of life.
The last option turns out to be even mischievous. It is playing games—
not
physical ones like badminton, tennis but psychological ones where you
try to manipulate people, get into their problems, complicate them and
generally enlarge the tension around you. Many a respectable person
indulges in this and creates problems where none existed.
The alternative to these are Functional options.
The first is become a Consultant.
Lurking inside every executive is a Consultant. But for this considerable expertise is require. All are not Consultants.
The second option is to start your own Business or industry.
But
this calls for entrepreneurial qualities which an executive may lack.
Many are the cases where lakhs of rupees have turned into thousands!.
The third option is to involve oneself in professional activities.
For this one must build up one’s position even before retirement. Many cliques operate to prevent outsiders from encroachment.
The fourth is to get into spiritual activities.
While
nobody is required between you and God, nowadays, we find more and more
godmen, swamijis, pseudo Gurus some even US returned. There is a
temptation to follow some Swamiji or even become one yourself. This is a
very slippery slope. Beware –there are more hoaxes in the religious
field than anywhere else!.
The last and most meaningful option is to cultivate a Hobby.
Use your creative abilities and do something that you enjoy doing. You should start this even while in service.
We live in three Boxes.
First is the Box of Learning, which starts from birth and goes on till 20 plus.
Second is the Box of Work which commences at 20 plus and goes on up to 58 or 60—the age of retirement.
Third is the Box of Leisure.
When
we are in the Box of Work what is significant is Status, Prestige,
Power—all these we aspire for and it is what we get from Life. The more
we get ---the happier we are.
The day we retire we move into Box 3—the one of Leisure.
If
we have to enjoy this we have to change our psychological position and
appreciate creativity, autonomy and integrity. When you were a small
child of two or three did status, prestige or money mean anything? What
you wanted was autonomy, creativity. A child is always creative. It
enjoys creativity. One example. When visitors come you ask your child,
“Pushpa -Sing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'”. She will not sing. You
shout at her. You tell your visitors proudly she is three only and knows
Twelve Nursery songs. The moment the guests are gone and your servant
comes for cleaning your daughter will sing to her all the twelve songs.
The child has its own values!
By
the time we enter the Box of Work values change. We are not taught to
respect our autonomy but fall in line—conformity is the rule. If the son
plays the violin his Mother will come and tell him, “Playing the Violin
now ?. Study now. Maths is very scoring. If you get cent-um admission to
IIT is easy. Life is competitive, dear son.”
When
we enter the Box of Leisure values change .Your psychological position
has to be changed. New values of creativity, integrity and autonomy
emerge. Hobbies are an excellent way of getting Leisure Value.
Everybody must identify his hobby that he can enjoy. No bother about
Power, Prestige and Status.
An
individual can live in one box only or interchange or combine the
boxes. You can have learning, work and leisure together. One can even
take up a hobby that is financially productive. As time passes one
learns.
The
real problem of retirement is that people refuse to face the problem.
The mantra is “Let us cross the bridge when we come to it.” This is not
correct. Since we live in three Boxes we must prepare ourselves for
crossing from one to the other. Structuring our time is the prime
requirement. In the beginning you are contributing to Value. Think of
Transfer Value. After retirement you can think of Leisure Value. Develop
good hobbies which incorporates your creativity, autonomy and
integrity. I have taken to Letter writing. (Rajaji , Kalam and H R F
Keating.)
You
will lead a happy life. Retirement is not adding “Years to your Life
but adding Life to your Years”. Retirement is not a calamity but an
opportunity.
I shall advert to some basic qualities one must cultivate.
There
are two ways to look at every situation in life. Is the Cup half empty
or is the cup half full. One man was not worried about his becoming
bald. He declared “I have less hair to comb!”. Another man in identical
situation moaned, “I have more face to wash !”.
Always remember that you are loved, even when it does not seem like it.
Believe in yourself and your values.
Don’t sell out when things go wrong.
Don’t let anything get you down. Always bounce back.
Set goals for your future and never settle for anything less.
Realise that there are others in this world with bigger problems than you.
Appreciate the good things of Life. Sunrise, Sunset, Flowers, Birds
Be thankful for the good times you have with your loved ones.
Spend more time with your family and friends.
Appreciate the simple things of Life and don’t get caught up in the material things of life.
Be an Optimist and see the Cup as being Half Full.
Before long your attitude will rub of on others.
You can make the world a better place to live by simply making yourself a happier person.
You will permit me to conclude with an allegorical story.
First
God created the Cow and said, “You must go with farmer daily to the
field all day long and suffer under the Sun, have calves, give milk and
help the farmer. I give you a span of sixty years.” The Cow said,
“That’s surely Tough. Give me only twenty years. I give back forty
years.”
On
Day Two God created the Dog and told him, “Sit all day by the door of
your house and bark at strangers. I give you a span of twenty years.”
The Dog said, “Too long time for barking. I give up ten years.”
On
the third day God created the Monkey and said to him, “Entertain
people. Make them laugh. I give you Twenty years.” The Monkey said to
God, “How boring, Monkey tricks for twenty years. Give me only Ten
years”. Lord agreed.
On the fourth day God created Man. He told him, “Eat, sleep, play, enjoy and do nothing. I will give you twenty years.”
Man
said, “Only twenty years. No way. I will take my Twenty and give me the
Forty the cow gave back, the Ten that the Monkey returned, and the Ten
the Dog surrendered. That makes eighty. O.K?”O.K said God. That is why
for the First twenty years we sleep, play enjoy and do nothing.
For the next forty years we slave in the Sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do Monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren.
And for the last Ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.
Thank You All. PP Ramachandran