Clickable Classic Jokes V: Math Humor

[skuban]

So I saw this at SU. Ubbiebubbie and Mrsiriustab seem to be enjoying it and I was chuckling along. Can we make a collaborative quiz about math puns?? Seems pretty enjoyable to me. 

[needapausebutton]

As long as its not too graphic.

(And so it begins)

Sounds fun, hopefully mrsiriustab will see this post, he is in BofC.

But Ubbiebubbie isn't.  Skuban, if you want to e-mail him to invite him to participate, have him check out the original thread: https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/sporcle-curators/30Hp3g1o6Ck and then e-mail me.

napb

[BanjoZebra]

Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?
To get to the same side.

[skuban]

Yup I've done so. I sent him an email telling him about the group. 

I hope he's not too divided on joining. He could really add a lot ;)

On another note: How does one fly in a 2-dimensional X-Y space? With a Cartesian plane, of course ;)

[needapausebutton]

skub,

I sent an email to mrsiriustab also, because obviously I want him to participate in this.

I suggested he e-mail you also, skuban, in this particular case.  If he's on board with this, I'd like the two of you to discuss the management of the quiz; since he may have been planning to make such a sequel, he may want to be the owner for this sort of a quiz.  (Since he was the one who actually postulated a further multiplication of Classical Jokes quizzes in that Sporcle U. thread).

He may be indifferent, but I just would like you guys to have the discussion before proceeding with the quiz format. Thanks.

[Trevor Birenbaum]

Skuban and I have exchanged emails and have agreed to collaborate.

I was going to make a sequel for the CCJ series themed as nerd humor, so this falls into that nicely. I'm just happy to contribute to a quiz series that I enjoy, and the assistance of skuban and the rest of BoC is much appreciated. I may not have made it clear to him in my emails, but we are going to co-own the quiz. I haven't been involved in the contributing of a BoC quiz yet, and I have only made one suggestion on a BoC idea. I personally do not think it is possible for me to know what to expect for making a BoC quiz, so taking someone who has been involved on a collaboration on with me is a good idea, in my opinion. I think skuban is the right person because he is the original poster for the idea.

I have created a quiz in the BoC account entitled "Classic Clickable Math Jokes" with skuban's and my name after it. The name is a placeholder for what I/we determine it should be later. I have entered some but not all options. I put in a joke that we are going to use in the data as an example. 

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[skuban]

^ What MST said. (MrSiriusTab, not Mountain Standard Time)

I'm happy to open up the floor to wonderful puns. I'm thinking of just nerding it up completely, as opposed to thinking strictly mathematically (as MST implied). On that note, I was thinking something about Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle. Something is there for that pun, but I just can't quite place my finger on it. 

[skuban]

Why can a company never succeed if they don't know calculus?

...

Because they can't differentiate! ;D

[ubbiebubbie1234]

Hey, I made it. Maybe my joining is a sine that this quiz will go far! (A very modest start by me.)

I guess I'll just present a few pun ideas.

• A black hole: Where God divided by zero
• Calculus students are advised to avoid consuming alcohol before doing their homework. Do not drink and derive.
  
• I see you have some graph paper. You must be plotting something.
• I used to hate maths but then I realised decimals have a point.
  
• What do organic mathematicians throw into their fireplaces? Natural logs.
  
• I'm bad at math, so the equation 2n+2n is 4n to me.
  
• He wears glasses during math because it improves division.
  
• Two mathematicians arguing about even numbers were at odds.
  
• The math teacher was a good dancer - he had algorithm.
• I strongly dislike the subject of math, however I am partial to fractions.
  

Just some ideas to throw out there,

[skuban]

Here is the test link:

http://www.sporcle.com/games/test/16e442

[skuban]

So that link is just to get a feel for what the game may end up resembling. I think that right now it includes everything that has been suggested in the forum, but we should all keep talking about the good and bad things to include or exclude. We're still very open for suggestions, so let's keep collaborating! 

[ubbiebubbie1234]

Here's some more:

• "What do you call a parrot with no cracker?" "A polynomial."
  
• And the Lord spake unto the host saying "Y equals A X squared plus B X plus C". And after the crowd had departed, his disciples came unto him saying "Lord, please explain this saying to us, for we understand it not", and he replied unto them "Verily, I know that thou understandest it not, for it is a parabola."
  
• Tip for keeping the pounds off: Trinomial (Try no meal)
• "What do you call a boiling kettle on top of a mountain?" "A high-pot-in-use!"
  
• "There were 99 people on a boat when it capsized. How many were left on the boat?" "66."
  
• "What did the zero say to the eight?" "Nice belt."
  
• "Why is two the oddest prime?" "Because it's the only one that's even."
  
• "What did the obtuse angle say to the smaller angle?" "You're acute angle."
  
• "How do geometry teachers travel?" "In a plane."
  
• "What do you call a leg that is perpendicular to a foot?" "A right ankle."
  
• "Having problems with your math? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]."
  
• "Why did the two vectors start an internet-based company?" "They thought they had a good dot product."
  
• "Why did the integer get mad at his wife?" "Because she was being irrational."
  
• "Shocking statistic... 50% of schools are below average."
  
• "Who invented King Arthur's round table?" "Sir Cumference."
  
• "How many numerical analysts does it take to change a lightbulb?" "0.99987 after four iterations."
  
• "Where are mathematicians buried?" "The symmetry."
• Pure mathematicians are like lighthouses in the middle of a swamp — brilliant, but completely useless.
  
• If God wanted us to use the metric system, why did Jesus have 12 apostles?
  
• For every complex mathematical problem, there is a simple and elegant solution that is completely wrong. (Alternatively...) For every complex mathematical problem, there is a solution. The difficulty lies in finding it.
• People who take a long time computing the ratio of rise to run are slope pokes.
  
• Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. (Sorta mathy, I guess.)

[vikZ]

I love all these jokes.

I'm going to have to be "that guy" for one thing though. This one, "Shocking statistic... 50% of schools are below average." irks me because that is (most likely) not true since people generally don't treat average to be the median.

Anyway I have some math jokes lying around. I'll post them when I can find them.

[Josh]

Just looking at it now- two things I want to bring up.

1- "Old mathematicians die, they just use some of their functions"  Shouldn't it be "Old mathematicians don't die?'

2- 10 minutes may be too much.  5 would be better.  

Thanks!

--Josh

[trevor.birenbaum]

Hey, all.

Just want to let you know that work is coming along on the quiz and that it has not stagnated, and when skuban and I deem the data entry done, we will post the test link here. 

[Josh]

So... what's new?

[mrsiriustab]

Hey guys. I just want to tell you that this one is going to be inactive for a little while (3 weeks-ish) until I'm done with my final exams. Please don't be concerned that this one has deflated.

Skuban has just moved and is also not able to work on this for awhile.

However, I am NOT saying -I repeat, NOT saying, that I am giving up for a while to do other things.  Please continue to put in jokes here. I think that the final quiz should have 20 or 25 in it.

Thanks for your patience :)

[mrsiriustab]

Hello all. I come today with a VERY IMPORTANT UPDATE. The theme of the quiz has been changed slightly. The theme has been changed from math humor to general science humor, or "nerd humor". I have the approval of both skuban and napb on this. The reasons are below, quoted from a set of emails between napb and me.

Lots of people like nerd humor (case and point being The Big Bang Theory).
It covers a wide variety of topics.
A higher percentage of Sporclers than non-Sporclers would get it, because Sporcle "teaches" a player a lot about those things from what I have seen. The jokes appeal to a more educated audience.
Math is rather niche (in terms of joking ability), and it would be easier for a person to dislike math and downrate the quiz than disliking all of science and downrating then.

You will notice that I mention The Big Bang Theory. I DO NOT WANT the quiz to turn into an episode summary of TBBT. Not all of the jokes can come from the show.

This will go a little slowly because skuban is busy with midterms, but know that progress has resumed. Thank you all very much!

[amazingjosh]

So, we still on? Today's publish by giveupyet seems *a little close* to what we're doing...
I hope not. 'Twould be a shame to see this hard work go to waste.

[skuban]

It's still on. I've just been quite busy for the past few months. Don't give up on it!