Bostoner Torah Insights: Bostoner ‘Chassidus’ in Hebrew and English: Parshas Vayechi – 18 Tevet 5784
Bostoner Torah Insights - Yerushalayim
Bostoner Torah Insights
Bostoner ‘Chassidus’ in English
Parshas Vayechi – 18 Tevet 5784
Bostoner Rebbe shlit”a – Yerushalayim
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After Yosef takes an oath that he will transport his father's remains back to the Cave of Machpaylah in Eretz Yisroel, the Pasuk says that "Yisroel bowed down towards the head of the bed" (Beraishis 47:31). The Midrash Aggadah and Piskta Zutrasa on this Pasuk both give the same two explanations as to whom Yaakov was bowing down to.
The first explanation is that Yaakov was bowing down to the Shechinah, the presence of Hashem that was at the head of his bed, to thank Him for giving him a son like Yosef. The second explanation is that he was bowing down to Yosef, the viceroy of Egypt, to accord him the proper honor. This would have been a fulfillment of Yosef's dream, as Yaakov himself had interpreted it, that the 'sun' – his father – would bow down to him (Beraishis 37:10)
Rashi on this Pasuk brings both of these interpretations as well. First, he quotes the Gemara (Megillah 16b) which learns from this Pasuk, "When the fox has his hour – bow to him", meaning that even though it might be viewed as improper for Yaakov to bow down to his son Yosef, an exeption could be made because at this moment in time Yosef was the viceroy of Egypt. Then in his next comment, Rashi quotes a different Gemara (Shabbos 12b) that proves from this Pasuk that the Shechinah dwells above the head of one who is ill. He explains that Yaakov was bowing to Hashem to thank Him for the fact that all of his children remained righteous, especially for Yosef who had been isolated in Egypt for so many years in a dangerous environment.
The Chasam Sofer comments on the words, "The time approached for Yisroel to die, so he called for his son Yosef…" (Beraishis 47:29) that this was the first time Yosef was meeting his father face-to-face in seventeen years. According to the Chasam Sofer, from the time Yaakov and his family settled in Goshen permanently, Yosef and Yaakov both went out of their way to avoid meeting in person. The main reason was the dilemma of who should show honor to whom.
If Yosef showed honor to his father Yaakov, he would be forfeiting his own Kavod, which is forbidden by Halacha regarding a King (Kidushin 32b). Although the Gemara does allow a father to forfeit his Kavod for a child, Yosef avoided such situations so that he would not cause instances where his father might be required to show him Kavod.
The Mitzvah of honoring one's parents, especially among the Avos, should not be taken lightly. The Gemara tells us that Yosef lost one year of his life for each of the ten times he heard his brothers refer to Yaakov as "our father, your servant" and did not interject (Sotah 13b). Similarly, because Yaakov did not honor his father Yitzchak for the 22 years he was in Charan, he was punished measure for measure for 22 years without his son Yosef (Megillah 16b-17a). This is also why the Torah records Terach's death before Avraham leaves for Charan, even though Terach did not actually die for another sixty years, so that people should not accuse Avraham of disrespecting his father by abandoning him in his old age back in Charan (Rashi to Beraishis 11:32).
Perhaps this is also why the Torah records practically no interaction between Avraham and Yitzchak during the last 35 years of Avraham's life, nor any interaction between Yitzchak and his son Yaakov during the last 21 years of Yitzchak's life. All we find is Yitzchak and Yishmael burying Avraham (Beraishis 25:9), and Yaakov and Eisav burying Yitzchak (Beraishis 35:29), and both of these events are recorded out of chronological order, well before Avraham and Yitzchak actually passed away. Once Yitzchak – and later Yaakov – became the active leader of Klal Yisroel, while their respective fathers took more of a passive role, interaction was mutually avoided to avert the problem of showing proper Kavod to one another.
This approach of viewing Kibud Av V'Em as the main consideration to analyze the actions of Yosef while Yaakov was in Mitzrayim would also answer a question posed to me on last week's Parsha by one of the young men in our Beis Midrash: Why does Yosef bring his brothers to meet Paro (Beraishis 47:2) before his father (Beraishis 47:7)? It would seem more proper for Yaakov to be introduced to Paro before the other brothers.
Once again, I would suggest that Yosef was actually motivated by Kibud Av V'Em. Yosef tells his entire family, "I will go up and tell Paro that my brothers and my father's household from Canaan have come to me" (Beraishis 46:31). Yosef appears before Paro without being called and brings along his five 'weakest' brothers when requesting that his family be allowed to settle in Goshen (47:2). Seemingly, Yosef was allowed to approach Paro unannounced at any time because of his status as viceroy, and his five brothers acted as his entourage. Alternatively, these brothers were being used as mere visual aids to help Yosef make his case to persuade Paro.
If Yaakov would have appeared with Yosef when he first entered, it would appear that Yaakov was part of Yosef's entourage. Yosef showed more honor to his father by first taking care of the matter regarding Goshen without his father present, and only afterward, upon concluding his business with Paro, presenting his father Yaakov as a dignitary in his own right to meet with his counterpart Paro.
In the merit of our meticulous observance of Kibud Av V'Em, may our Father in Heaven reward us measure for measure, by having mercy on his children. Just as we transitioned last week from the fasting and somberness of Asarah B'Teves to the joy and delight of Shabbos, may we speedily transition from the darkness and gloom of this Galus to the elation and enjoyment of the era of Y'mos HaMoshiach the Yom Sh'Kulo Shabbos.
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