Why did I start this group and what am I hoping for?

[mathie...@rocketmail.com]

I have just recently come to settle in this lovely clean historic town
and I think it is going to suit me fine.

Yet I can't help noticing in the evenings and at weekends there seems
to be a terrible lack of opportunities to get together for relaxation
and company. I feel this must particularly bother younger people who
don't have much opportunity to develop their social skills and create
good friendships which will hopefully last for life. When I was young
there were interesting opportunities available every night - youth
club, snooker hall, football, cinema, theatre, folk clubs, boy’s
brigade, scouts, and lots more. These days TV and internet can keep
you busy, but they will never satisfy so much as being with real
people. Especially if you're hoping that one day you might want to be
involved with a partner.

Where I grew up there were lively cheap social activities for all age
groups, not including being a nightly regular in a pub, which was
considered a failure to find a social life. My Dad's Men’s Club had
bowling, cards, games, etc. Mothers and housewives had their own club
with everything from knitting, fitness classes, country dancing,
putting on little variety shows, to inviting minor celebrities and
specialists to entertain them or teach them things like meditation,
baking and cosmetics (the Avon lady didn't just sell you make-up, but
showed you how to use it.)

The pensioners like my granny had the White Heather Club where they
all had dinner together then some old-style entertainment, like sing-
song. They often went off on coach trips for the day, everybody
enjoyed the dressing-up and the blether, so no-one was left at home
alone all the time, getting lonely and depressed.

Every year there were lots of parties - family weddings, engagements,
anniversaries, birthdays, retirements, big end-of-season dos for
schools, youth organizations, works and factories, etc. Then you've
got Christmas, New Year, and Halloween. The excitement from one big
party was just fading when you saw the next one coming up. I'm sure
the old folk of Bo'ness remember a time there was a lively scene like
that here too and realize the younger folk are missing out on what was
a major part of our lives.

In the 70s, 80s and 90s, everywhere I lived in the South of England -
Tunbridge Wells, Oxford and Glastonbury -there were lots of activities
where you could meet people and enjoy company inexpensively without
getting drunk and deafened at an expensive nightclub. Just for
starters we had bowling, indoors or out, badminton, night classes in
kung fu, feng shui, carpet-weaving, video film-making, skateboard
stunts, drama, drumming and the ever-popular life drawing. I was
always involved in the local live music scene, where all the bands
would go to each other's gigs and the fantastic parties afterwards. To
be friends of the band, rich kids would invite us all out to massive
parties at their parents' country houses, or a weekend mini-festival
in one of their fields. On summer evenings we'd get together for a
friendly football knockabout on the common while the girlfriends
exchanged gossip and checked out each other's shoes, bags, nose
piercings, etc. Can't you just see it now, on that pitch between the
railway and the harbour? Midsummer's Eve a couple of wee bonfires on
the beach, bring your own barbecue, it wouldn't cost £20 for a wee
generator and speakers to crank out the kind of music we all like. You
know, after Mum and Dad have sung along to Summertime Blues then taken
Granny home, it's Fireflies and Your Sex Is On Fire, eh?

Anyway, all I'm saying is I know quite a bit about social life and
successful trouble-free parties, from raves to alcohol-free get-
togethers for under-18s only, from line-dancing to 70s disco retro
nights (in Glastonbury we wore flares, Bee Gees shirts, fuzzy Afro
wigs, everyone was barefoot or in their socks so no one got hurt when
'everybody was kung fu fighting'....

I've started this group because I would like to help improve my new
community - and hopefully make some good friends - by putting into
action what I learned on my travels before I got here. I've only
mentioned the parties to whet your appetite - though I haven't
mentioned the New Venture Club, for over-30 divorced, single and
widowed, and those separated where the other partner agrees they're
free to tango - that's where my brother met the best match of his
lifetime! But there are lots of other good social activities for all
age groups and I'm only giving a few examples based on my own
experiences and skills which I have to contribute. For example, can
you imagine an acoustic guitar evening every week in the meeting room
above the Library? I'd be willing to run that as it was a great help
to me when I was 16 to go to a Folk Club in a local school. We all
took shots each at early Bob Dylan or Irish Rebel songs, blushing and
trying to memorise what each other did to practice during the week.
This would be just for fun, not X-factor. Young folk today don't know
a major part of the fun in these days was we all sang the chorus after
every verse! I've always found it more fun to play something simple
along with someone else than to play a brilliant complex masterpiece
to your bedroom wall.

Other skills I have to contribute are that I have learned quite a lot
about advertising, planning and organizing events, video camera
recording, editing, performance, the internet, computers and many of
the things you can do with these. I started very shy myself so I find
it easy to coach people of all kinds patiently and encouragingly,
increasing their confidence.
It would make me happy to share with others what I've learned, so
hopefully I'll never be lonely in my old age. For example, you dig up
one of these tiny photos from the 30s, 40s, and 50s or whenever, like
these little 1-inch photos you got in a booth in a station. I can show
you in minutes how to enlarge it, clean it up so it's a better photo
then print it out full A4 size. I made my mother very happy with this
not long before she died. In a drawer I found one of those tiny photos
of her when she was 23, a couple of years before she met Dad. She told
me he carried it in his wallet from when they got engaged till he
died. When I took it to her printed over 8 inches by 11 inches she was
astounded to see she looked like a gorgeous film star but she had
never seen the picture properly before. She immediately decided to
send it to her grand-daughter, "just to show her granny wasn't always
a wrinkled old woman" I’d like to give anybody that experience, no
charge.

Anyway, as you can see, I like going on and on. That's another thing
today's kids are missing. When I was young the world was full of
interesting old men who would keep us amazed for hours listening to
them talk about whatever they were good at.

Apart from throwing out these ideas to stimulate interest, there's no
point me trying to do all this myself or even to think I know exactly
what this town needs. I want the people to join this group as equals
and say what they personally would like to see in the way of
entertainment or social life. Of course, I hope they will be willing
to help in working to achieve it. So, please contribute to this Group
and do what you can to get other Bo'nessians interested. I'm sure we
can get a full range of activities that will have folk coming from
Grangemouth and Lithgow to this town and we'll all end up feeling we
can't think of anywhere else we'd rather live.

There are various other bodies we can approach for help, co-operation
and even financial assistance, like Falkirk, Bo'ness Area Forum,
Bo’ness Development Group, Bonnie Bo'ness, etc. I'm sure they will
like our ideas once we've knocked them into shape. I don't want to
seem critical but it seems to me they've overlooked the social life
aspect of re-generating the town. They seem to have lost their drive
since the finance for the Marina was put on hold. Meanwhile the last
few operating shops continue to struggle because there's so little to
bring pedestrians through the centre. I noticed down in England that
committees seem to plod along in slow motion, getting lost in minutes,
agendas and apologies for not attending. Real improvements are
achieved by go-ahead dynamic we-need-it-now types. It's nice that the
roads, pavements and litter-bins are being improved but if people
continue to go to Lithgow or Falkirk for all their shopping and
entertainment, while those who can't afford it sink into loneliness or
other problems indoors, the metal seats with no backs (terribly
uncomfortable after say, 40) won't attract many folks out to chat
about this and that.

I'm inclined to copy an idea I saw in Glastonbury that really worked.
They have a Glastonbury in Bloom committee which every summer dishes
out awards for Best Garden, Most Colourful Window-Boxes, etc. They
also knock the door if a garden is going to ruin to put in a polite
"tut-tut" about letting down the neighbours and the town. But what
this team of volunteers also do, with Council money, is make sure
every lamppost, shop front and public building has large hanging
baskets of cheap and cheerful flowers, from February to October.
The effect is fantastic. Now, all the lampposts on the Seaview
Roundabout near where I live are already fitted with crossbars just
waiting for 2 of these baskets each. So, just imagine someone like I
was in my 30s, fast-moving business type, on a Saturday afternoon,
whizzing down the Wynd in my sports car with my girl-friend, just
coming to see what's here in this place with the quaint name (I always
thought it sounded nice, like 'Beau Ness'). First thing we see is this
cheerful display of colourful flowers - that goes with her dress, or
shawl. Then seeing the wonderful variety of original old buildings (my
internet friends in Canada, Holland and Australia all say it looks
beautiful) I'd be for parking the car and spending the rest of the day
looking around. We'd check the Kinneill Railway, and then take the
walking tour to see the various buildings and where the oil works,
mines, pottery and foundry were. (I see I'll have to create the
leaflet so it can be available free at various locations, which of
course brings customers into the shops). We would want our meal after
that - rather stovies at Bryan's than Indian. Then we'd be looking to
spend the evening where the locals gather for their fun. But where is
there? If things were going well with my date and I wanted to have a
wee drink, I'd be looking for a bed and breakfast, to enjoy a lazy
Sunday in the town too. But there are only 3 places I know of and the
best one doesn't have a sign. See, this is money coming into the town
that would go away and recommend the place to friends if they had a
good time. The way it is at present, they would just drive along to
Muirhouses and back, then probably take all their money on to
somewhere to Stirling. Or say a huge crowd turned up at Kinneill
Railway one day, all attracted by the Tesco Club Vouchers discount.
What is there to keep them here all day? Mathiesons and Bryan's close
at 4 and the newsagents at 5.
Anyway, the flower baskets at the roundabout are a good idea, aren't
they? Even if it's just something nice to stop and chat about as we
pass on the pavement. But what should I do? Spend hours writing up a
proposal then finding out which council office it has to go to, then
maybe wait a few months for a meeting when they write back to say am I
not paying too much for the baskets? Or do I just go to a garden
centre and lay out my own money to make the improvement right away?

Sorry, this was actually just meant to be a couple of paragraphs. Now
please give me your input. I don't want to go hiring the Town Hall for
a night the whole town's meant to remember for months, then have to
eat all the sandwiches myself. So, what do you think would be a good
improvement in the local social life and if it was organised, would
you definitely come along and bring your friends?