I Wish I Knew How to Quit You ...

[Rui Ma]

Dearest Friends,

It's that time of year again ...

yup ...

... It's QUITTING SEASON!!

Yours Truly has quit her corporate job for new, as-of-yet unnamed adventures. To celebrate, she has rounded up a few of her fellow Combatants against Convention (and perhaps, some of you may think, Common Sense as well) to ceremonialize that often-imagined but rarely-executed act ... Quitting One's Job. Yes indeed, I'm not the only one who has thrown in the towel, embarking on funemployment, seeking a sabbatical, or just taking a goddamn break this very fine Holiday Season. For those of you who have done it, come gloat and bask in your well-deserved envy ... for those who haven't yet but want to, come and get some escapist alcohol therapy where we will assure you that your turn soon awaits and learn some time-tested strategies for the Big Day ... for those who are perfectly content with their lives, well, come and share your merriment (or whatever hallucinogens you are apparently addicted to), and show us where we went Wrong, by all means. 

Where will the festivities take place, you ask? Janes & Hooch, a new bar that just opened in Sanlitun that yours truly also am a small-time owner in.  We will, in fact, have SPECIALLY THEMED DRINKS for the evening --

Date: December 13, THURSDAY

Time: 8PM-12AM

Place: Janes & Hooch, a new modern speakeasy [directions below]

三里屯，工体北路4号院内Block 10 

New friends are welcome.

Call me at 186 1106 9562 if you get lost.

Special Drinks to Mark the Occasion:

• THE TYLER DURDEN - Inspired by: Fight Club, 1999
  less glamorously known as ... Spiked Hot Chocolate
  Old Fitzgerald Bourbon, Frangelico, Cacao, Secret Ingredient: Cow Juice 
  

Tyler Expounds: You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

• THE PETER GIBBONS - Inspired by: Office Space, 1999
  more affectionately known as ... Spiked Hot Toddy
  Havana 7 years, Maple, Citrus, Secret Ingredients: Festive Spices
  

Peter Declares ... 
Joanna: So you're gonna quit?
Peter Gibbons: Nuh-uh. Not really. Uh... I'm just gonna stop going. 

• THE WESLEY - Inspired by:  Wanted, 2008
  less violently known as ... Fernet & Coke
  Fernet Branca, Cola Reduction, Citrus, Secret Ingredient: Angostura Bitters 
  

Wesley Inquires: This is me taking control from Sloane, from the fraternity, from Janice from billing reports, from ergonomic keyboards, from cheating girlfriends and sack a shit best friends. This is me taking back control of my life. What the fuck have you done lately?

• THE JERRY MAGUIRE - Jerry Maguire, 1996
  more elegantly known as ... the Boulevadier
  Campari, Old Fitzgerald Bourbon, Cinzano Rosso ... Secret Ingredient: Nothing

Jerry Implores: But let me just, let me just say, as I ease out of the office I helped build -- I'm sorry, but it's a FACT! -- that there is such a thing as manners, a way of treating people. [Noticing the fish tank nearby] These fish have manners. These fish have manners. In fact, they're coming with me. I'm starting a new company, and the fish will come with me. You can call me sentimental. The fish -- they're coming with me.But if anybody else wants to come with me, this moment will be the ground floor of something real and fun and inspiring and true in this godforsaken business and we will do it together! Who's coming with me besides... "Flipper" here?

• THE LESTER BURNHAM - American Beauty, 1999
  less dangerously known as ... Dark & Fruity
  Secret Ingredient: Gosling’s Black Rum, Bitter Marmalade, Ginger Beer, Seasonal Fruits

Lester Sniggers: Janie, today I quit my job. And then I told my boss to go fuck himself, and then I blackmailed him for almost sixty thousand dollars. Pass the asparagus. 

There may even be a THE RUI MA for all of you non-alcoholic nutters. I'm still working on the inspirational elements for that one. 

How can you say no to such foolproof fun?? That's right. After Thursday night, you will be so well-versed in the Art of Quitting that you may just never ever ever think about, well, just about anything, in the same way again.  

PS: Even the ever stoic Ennis, we are told, is convinced that he might have been able to quit Jack, if only we had held our event prior to their Brokeback Mountain rendezvous.

Don't miss it!!!!!

RSVP requested. Cash only. New friends welcome. 

--

Best Regards,

Rui Ma

Be Well, and Do Good.