Hi again,
I have a similar setup to yours and am also planning on upgrading everything later this year.
Can't really answer your questions but perhaps my experience will shed some light.
- Even though Scalelite (SL) 1.3 should/could be compatible with BBB 3, it is best if you upgrade to the latest SL release. In my experience there have been some/many problems which have been solved by upgrading to a newer release. Even if you do stay on SL 1.3 and post around here regarding a problem, the most probable answer will be "update to the latest version".
- "Safest"... can't really say. I have done some test-upgrades (e. g. 1.3->1.4, 1.4.->1.5) and have had no major problems. I wouldn't do 1.3->1.6 since that's a very big "jump", but it may just work. There are many new features in the newer versions. A DB migration should be done automatically (e.g. you don't have to do it explicitly).
- Sure, SL can remain in ubuntu 20.04 since the images/containers can always be updated to the latest version. An OS upgrade for SL is not a prerequisite, but it is highly recomended. Besides, you WILL have to update Ubuntu 20.04 sometime in the future. It might be a good oportunity to start "fresh" (24.04 for example).
BTW, if you're running the version of coturn that comes with Ubuntu 20.04 please do update as soon as possible, since the included coturn version of Ubuntu 24.04 has many fixes, albeit it's not perfect.
Hope this helps.
Regards,
J.