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Generally speaking, I tend to believe that sexy is something you are, not something you try to do. But one glance at my lingerie drawer and my obsession with keeping my skin tan and smooth tells me differently. I try to be sexy everyday. Most women do, in their own way. Some women walk into a room in a short dress, high heels and a banging body, and nobody has to question whether or not she’s trying to be sexy. Other women play the demur card and play the role of a bit of a tease. However, there are some things women do when they are trying to be sexy that have quite the opposite effect. Here are five things you should stop doing if you’re trying to be sexy.

1. Reveal too much. Most of us use our clothing to express to the world how we’re feeling that day. Feelin sassy and sexy? Wear your shortest skirt, but don’t pair it with your sheer, low cut top and highest shoes. Part of being sexy is making him wonder, and in that get up, the only thing he’ll be wondering is what you look like swinging from a pole.

2. Act completely ridiculous. I’m talking about the whole pouting, tossing of the hair, sticking a finger in your mouth and sucking on it while staring at him thing. What is that? Stop it.

3. Force yourself to be someone you’re not. Perhaps your guy really digs black lace lingerie, and you’re more of a sweats and a t-shirt girl. Surprising him in a sexy new getup is one thing, and incredibly hot because you know that it’s a one time thing. But if you’re constantly forcing yourself to look sexy by dressing up how you think you should, or acting like an entirely different person to attract a man, you quickly stop being sexy and start being desperate.

4. Sending naked photos. I know the jury is out on this one, but for casual dating purposes it’s a big no no. Especially the mirror shots in your bathroom! This isn’t Myspace. Not to mention, the chance is just too high that the photos will end up on the internet, and the internet never forgets!

5. Go insane in bed. Faking orgasms, fake moaning and screaming, jumping around like you’re a (playboy) bunny, demanding sex in public places because you read somewhere that guys like that, offering to do “anything”, pulling out every sex toy ever made, and trying all positions from the kama sutra in one night. Chill out…sex should be fun, and sometimes it’s NOT going to be a steamy sex scene from a movie. Stop trying to prove how sexy you are, and just go be sexy!

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