Hey frisky frisbeteers,
Well, the glory days of summer league are upon us, which can only mean one thing: betsy gets the first pick at all the young studs here for a limited time only―which is, of course, the perfect amount of time for betsy to weave her warped web and ensnare all helpless victims in her fickle love triangles. And betsy doesn't discriminate boys, you can be sure of that.
WEEKLY ITEM #1: The Weekly Schedule
Pick Up, Tuesday July 1st at Deshengmen, 8-10.
again, young co-eds are flocking to summer pick up like ryan flocks to wasted underage girls. if you are lucky, you may meet kevin's female doppelganger, who rivals him in sticky hands and cuteness. as usual, be prepared for some nasty play set to the tune of your favorite song dynasty folk music―you guessed it―yangge! Field is turf so plan accordingly.
Saturday July 5th, no big brother practice, rest dem weary bones
Sunday July 6th, Happy Valley Fields, 3.30, Summer League
Meet at DZM at 2.30. See below for details.
lunch time poll:
who is most likely to kill toni [with an "i"] the next time he gets blitzed on "190" (betsy is savvier than you think) and harasses every single moving object in his presence:
Jeff, because if toni spills something on him one more time he will be forced to go for the jugular
Tina, because toni disgraces his people every time he shows he can't hold his liquor
Chris, because he will be so furious that once again toni is to drunk to make sweet love to him, as any good friend should
Charona, because she is already is such deep doodoo with her boyfriend already for shanghai and she can't risk what may follow if she ends up alone in a bed with toni once again
WEEKLY ITEM #2: Upcoming Events
the 2nd week of Summer League! every Sunday until the end of August, Happy Valley fields, 3.30 pm
Meet at Dongzhimen at 2.30. Games are every Sunday afternoon and the price for a full season will be 350 RMB (175 student) and 225 for a half season (110 student). If you are paying on a game-by-game basis it is 50 RMB (35 student). This full season fee will cover field fees, jerseys and a party at the end of the season. For questions, email Jeff at orcutt.jeff at gmail.com
8月30-31日 ―― Singapore
Late October ―― Hong Kong
11月 22-23日 ―― Manila
WEEKLY ITEM #3: Betsy's Corner
Time for Betsy's summer league recap, because she knows how much it matters to the little people.
All four teams showed promise on the field last Sunday, leaving no doubt in betsy's mind that this summer league will be the mother of all summer leagues. After a scathing opening cheer by biantai la that made even the laotou's ears burn with embarrassment (betsy will not dare incur joe's wrath by quoting it here), the durian assassins and the biantais traded points almost all of the way through the game. The durians pulled ahead of biantai la (huckin hotties is the English family show name) to end the game at 11-9. some excellent points were played head to head in this game and while durian took the game, biantai showed that they are good contenders, although a little perverse and abnormal.
The other two teams, TBA and TBA had a fair go at it as well, but in the end the individual prowess that comprised TBA was no match for the teamwork honed by TBA, who took the game at 11-6. One particularly embarrassing moment for TBA was when an easy goal in the end zone was flubbed by a TBA captain (I think I need not mention names for the sheer obviousness of the person in question), who, instead of deftly bringing down the disc, decided to twirl about like a ballerina in a music box--except for that there was no music to be heard and the person in question, although probably dresses up like a ballerina from time to time, does not even have the basic skill set am ultimate-playing ballerina would have that would without a doubt prevail in a score. Well, it seems that TBA is clearly the better team and the one that betsy is going to put all her money on in the finals. Oh, and way to go on the names, you guys. The creativity is just bursting at the seams.
All in all, a monumental start for a monumental league. See you out on Sunday for more of where that comes from.
WEEKLY RUMOR THAT MUST BE TRUE:
So, it's no secret that doc and
julia are vacationing together at lake wallenpaupack in the Poconos―but why
not? Were their playful jokes about getting married at the hat tourney really
just innocent fun, or is this the only way they could put their plan into
action without reid and candice's mom finding out? I bet no one knew that I am
an ordained minister at the Beijing International Christian Fellowship, and
marry couples on a bi-monthly basis at the Happy Valley branch of the church. You
also probably didn't realize that the top hat doc was trying to find an excuse
to wear all weekend at shanghai was really just a post-modern neo-engagement ring
(all the hipsters are doing it). So make sure you congratulate doc and Julia
upon their imminent return. You can expect a divorce in 57 days after Julia
realizes that doc was using her to make betsy jealous all along. Sorry doc, I
told you a million times: it would never work between us. I hate kilts.
Weekly Rumor Disclaimer: The Weekly Rumor is absolutely and one hundred percent true. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
WEEKLY ITEM #4: Social Calendar
Item #1: Wednesday eve, Sandy's Cousin's Bar--Night
of Blueberry (Lan Mei Zhi Ye). Located at Yuan Dynasty bar street (Huixin
Dongjie, Chaoyang district).
Sandy needs our help winning the party at her cousin's bar anniversary party. Last year she carried the six-month anniversary all by herself, but because she is related to the owner it didn't count for anything. Here is what Sandy has to say about it:
"I would like to extend to you all a formal invitation to
come to my cousin's bar next Wednesday, July 2. They are celebrating their
year long anniversary!!!! My cousin wants for all of us to come
celebrate, drink beer, and enjoy each others company!!!!! All of the
alcohol and beer will be half priced. There will be a show. They
will probably be strippers. Probably. That means a high
percentage. But not full, but high percentage. Well,
strippers/belly dancers. You'll see when you get there. No matter
what, it will not disappoint. I won't disappoint either."
tell the cabbie: go to Sino-Japanese Friendship Hospital
(Zhongri Youhao Yiyuan), and the bar street is 100m north of the hospital. Give Sandy
a call if you have trouble finding it. 13601102151
Item #2: Betsy is cookin up a little sumtin sumtin for a killer girls night out party for big brother women and honorary big brother women (the requirement for this is that you must actually be a woman, or at least an ftm tranny). Sorry boys, you're not invited. Except for wang bin. Cause we love him so much. and the party will not be starting at sandy's cousin's bar (again) at 9:30 and ending at her house at 3am; read: big brother girls will not be sleeping in see-through nighties waiting to be ravished by any and all eligible bachelors at sandy's on Saturday night.
which brings us finally to your moment of zen:
catch you on the field,
robo-gabe in the canada national day chilli eating competition !!!
75 fucking peppers in 5 minutes.....no wonder he wasnt at summer
league on sunday !!!
he is the epitomy of BIAN TAI LA !!!!!!!!
betsy beijing wrote:
> Hey frisky frisbeteers,
> Well, the glory days of summer league are upon us, which can only mean one
> thing: betsy gets the first pick at all the young studs here for a limited
> time only—which is, of course, the perfect amount of time for betsy to weave
> her warped web and ensnare all helpless victims in her fickle love
> triangles. And betsy doesn't discriminate boys, you can be sure of that.
> WEEKLY ITEM #1: The Weekly Schedule
> Pick Up, Tuesday July 1st at Deshengmen, 8-10.
> again, young co-eds are flocking to summer pick up like ryan flocks to
> wasted underage girls. if you are lucky, you may meet kevin's female
> doppelganger, who rivals him in sticky hands and cuteness. as usual, be
> prepared for some nasty play set to the tune of your favorite song dynasty
> folk music—you guessed it—yangge! Field is turf so plan accordingly.
> 8月30-31日 —— Singapore
> Late October —— Hong Kong
> 11月 22-23日 —— Manila
> wallenpaupack in the Poconos—but why not? Were their playful jokes about