> This Pride Month, Burger King will be asking customers: “Dine in or take
> out? Or do you want to me to shove the order straight up your gay asshole?”
> There’s a new King of Burgers – new CEO Daniel Schwartz is taking the
> company in a whole new direction, putting poop at the top of his list.
> Schwartz isn’t just into poop – he also wants to mix poop with semen,
> and he wants to involve children in the activities.
> He has been widely hailed as incredibly brave, as he pushes back against
> the brutal and oppressive Christian-dominated culture of America. He is
> standing up to power, and saying: “it’s time we start shoving things
> into the anuses of small children, it’s time for children to eat semen
> from adult men.”
> Right now, children are prevented from having things shoved up their
> anuses by the powerful Christian lobby. A big mover and shaker in the
> oppressive Christian order of America is Chick-fil-A. Schwartz is taking
> a shot at these bigots by producing his own chicken sandwich – and
> donating a portion of the proceeds to a group trying to force children
> to become homosexuals.
> The Human Rights Campaign, which will get 40 cents from every
> anti-Christ freedom anus burger sold by Burger King, has an entire
> program devoted to turning children into trannies.
> Christian bigots don’t want to admit it, but the science is very clear:
> many people’s souls are born in the wrong bodies. This is hard science.
> When a soul is born in the wrong body, the person feels trapped, and the
> only solution is to inject them with hormones and mutilate their genitals.
> The hateful right-wing Christians at Chick-fil-A are trying to prevent
> this, and Burger King is taking a big risk by coming out and trying to
> mutilate these children.
> The CEO of Chick-fil-A has recently tried to embrace change by
> worshiping black people.
> But worshiping our African gods means nothing if you’re unwilling to
> shove things in the anuses of children and mutilate their genitals.
> In the greater scheme of things, not even the Jews of Burger King are
> doing enough to bring freedom to children whose souls were tragically
> placed in the wrong body by an otherworldly force (that isn’t God
> because God is a lie – science is still trying to find the force that is
> manipulating the distribution of souls and putting them in the wrong
> Burger King has play places for children.
> However, in line with the patriarchal norms of this Christian-dominated
> society, there is no fisting area at the children’s play places.
> Activists are calling on Burger King to install a fisting area at the
> Burger King play places, where homosexual and tranny children can be
> fisted by adult men.
> Schwartz has yet to respond to these demands, but until he does, we have
> to ask: is he really devoted to homosexual children, or is he simply
> making a quick buck off of the billions of people who are adamant about
> turning children into homosexuals?
Schwartz goes on the list for the great cull. Near the top of