The Glasgow Vasectomy
sandy58
Glesga vasectomy....
After having their 11th child (Pocahontas Brittany Larsson O'Neill),
a Glesga couple decided that enough was enough because they could not
afford
a larger bed. So the husband went to his GP and told him that he and
his
missus didn't want to have any more children (Wur no wantin ony mair
weans,
so wur no).
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a
vasectomy
that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. "A less costly
alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a firework banger
available from most east end corner shops all year round, put it in an
empty
beer can, light it then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.
The Glesga Ned said to the doctor, "Ah might no be the
smartest
tool in the shed, but Ah cannae see how pittin a firework in a beer
caun
next to my ear is gonnae help me no tae huv ony mair weans".
"Trust me," said the doctor.
So the Ned went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1" "2" "3" "4"
"5" .....
at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and
resumed counting on his other hand.
This procedure is available on the NHS, by the way, and works in
Govan, Barrachnie, Garthamlock, Clydebank , Parkhead,
Caldercruix, Shettleston, Bishopbriggs, Carmyle, and Barlanark
SG1
"sandy58" <alec...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
news:c0614fda-6259-4693...@b15g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
Glad ya dinna say Aberdeen or I might not be here..........
.
"sandy58" <alec...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
news:c0614fda-6259-4693...@b15g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
That would be good,
for retards like yourself..
sandy58
> "sandy58" <alecki...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
so the wee anony-mouse is as gutless here as in it's other ngs. Got a
sense of humour like a brick on the back of the napper. Fuck off and
die, gutless asshole. :-)
sandy58
Oops! Sorry child. I didn't realise you were a kid....trying to be a
smartass.
comp.sys.cbm
comp.sys.amiga.games
aus.computers.linux
.
Whatever you reckon, shit-for-brains!
Clueless morons, like yourself should
be flushed at birth.
sandy58
Smile, shit-for-brainz. You were born a cunt..through a
cunt....belonged to a cunt...so why not have a day off.....and be a
fucking cunt. Ya cunt. :-) Your mama kept the after-birth ...and
flushed YOU, ya cunt! She had brainz. :-)
sandy58
> d3903212-4dee-4625-86fb-0baddf4f5...@p35g2000yqh.googlegroups.com
You are WELL-named, twat. I BET you are...an arseclown, sheepshagger.
sandy58
> c42fedb7-2fa9-4685-9a2d-b588c52e6...@j19g2000yqk.googlegroups.com
>
> sandy58 wrote:
> > On Nov 9, 8:14 am, ArseClown <4vs5g6g...@4ge56r6e4.org> wrote:
> >> d3903212-4dee-4625-86fb-0baddf4f5...@p35g2000yqh.googlegroups.com
>
> >> sandy58 wrote:
> >> > On Nov 7, 10:36 pm, "." <.@.com> wrote:
> >> >> "sandy58" <alecki...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
>
>
> a6a3-0d4390fb9...@b15g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
LOL
sandy58
> c42fedb7-2fa9-4685-9a2d-b588c52e6...@j19g2000yqk.googlegroups.com
>
> sandy58 wrote:
> >> d3903212-4dee-4625-86fb-0baddf4f5...@p35g2000yqh.googlegroups.com
>
> >> sandy58 wrote:
> >> > On Nov 7, 10:36 pm, "." <.@.com> wrote:
> >> >> "sandy58" <alecki...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
>
>
> a6a3-0d4390fb9...@b15g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
hahahahahhah Now we're ALL cunts on here. :-)
news reader
an orphaned snake. By coincidence both were blind from birth.
One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest and tripped over the snake
and fell down.
'Oh, my,' said the bunny, 'I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I've
been blind since birth and can't see where I'm going. In fact, since I'm
also an orphan, I don't even know what I am.'
'That's ok,' replied the snake. 'Actually, I too, have been blind since
birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither
all over you, and figure out what you are so you'll know. '
'That would be wonderful' replied the bunny.
So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, 'Well, you're covered
with soft fur, you have really long ears, your nose twitches, and you have a
soft cottony tail. I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit.'
'Oh, thank you, thank you,' cried the bunny, in obvious excitement.
The bunny suggested to the snake, 'Maybe I could feel you all over with my
paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me.'
So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, 'Well, you're smooth and
slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone and no balls. I'd say
you must be a team leader, a supervisor or possibly someone in senior
management!'
news reader
> for retards like yourself..
It's amazing that you can actually spell the word "retards".
SG1
"news reader" <newsr...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
news:7%kKm.53808$ze1....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
L.A.T.
>> That would be good,
>> for retards like yourself..
>
> It's amazing that you can actually spell the word "retards".
You will note that it is a word that requires only the left hand
>
>
.
"news reader" <newsr...@bigpond.com> wrote in message
news:60lKm.53809$ze1....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
>> for retards like yourself..
>
> It's amazing that you can actually spell the word "retards".
>
Are you fishing dipshit?
You should give up making
donuts, and perving at children.
And get a job!
.
"L.A.T." <tt...@ispdr.net.au> wrote in message
news:1HmKm.53837$ze1....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
Now..don`t stutter..shit-head!
jonz
not you lot.....cunts are useful.............
--
jonz
"Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea - massive,
difficult to redirect, awe-inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind
- boggling amounts of excrement when you least expect it." - Gene
Spafford,1992