A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
Anyone who thinks old age is golden must not have had a very
How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of
to become a teen-ager who wants to stay out all night?
Business conventions are important because they demonstrate
how many people a company can operate without.
Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than
everyone else looks?
Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job.
No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy
There are no new sins....the old ones just get more publicity.
There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number
at 4AM. It could be a right number.
Think about this.....
No one ever says "It's only a game" when their team is winning.
How come we choose from just two people for president
and 50 for Miss America?
Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag
Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough
to make them all yourself.
One of the quickest ways for a young man to fail in life is to
hard the boss will think he's after his job.
A backyard barbecue draws two things....flies and relatives.
The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts
If you don't have a sense of humor,
you probably don't have any sense at all.
Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
You know you're old when you reach down to get the wrinkles
out of your panty hose and realize you aren't wearing any.
I've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.