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     Alternative Leadicine
     ---------------------
     A midget imam from Mombassa
     Remarked in a raunchy madrasa
     I can chew chicken halal--
     Marry more than one gal.
     Can a cock caress a kielbasa?
     A short sheikh from Mozambique
     Replied to the madrasic pique
     A cock--you can chew,
     A chick--you can screw,
     But a rooster can't peck his own beak.
     A Catholic from Constantinople
     Replied to their Arabic scruple,
     A cock--you can suck,
     But a girl--you can't fuck.
     Holy popes poke boys in the poop hole.
     A Hillbilly quite Appalachian
     Reviled their raunchy liaison:
     It don't breed 'till it bleeds,
     A boy's arse is for seats,
     So you sickos can suck on my shotgun.
     ------------------------------------------------------------
     Moral of the story: a liberal dose of lead cures pedophilia.
     That is the science of alternative leadicine.