People who call their parents by their first names
Berkeley Brett
first names?
It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
regions in which this practice is common?
Thanks in advance....
--
Brett (in Berkeley, California, USA)
http://www.electoralmaps.org/
Pictorial election results for every U.S. Presidential Election from
George Washington to Barack Obama.
Percival P. Cassidy
> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
>
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
> does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
> regions in which this practice is common?
>
> Thanks in advance....
Over 50 years ago, an aunt and uncle of mine in UK were bringing up
their children to call them by their first names.
We have American friends whose children call them by their first names.
Perce
Arcadian Rises
> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
>
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
> does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
> regions in which this practice is common?
>
> Thanks in advance....
>
> --
> Pictorial election results for every U.S. Presidential Election from
> George Washington to Barack Obama.
I don't know about specific regions, but I assume certain groups of
people may call their parents by first name: adopted children, in case
they have a relationship with their biological parents, I think it's
more likely they call them by first name rather than "biological mom"
or "Mrs. Smith". Also, children raised by their grandparents, who call
their grandparents "Mom" and "dad", may call their parents by first
name, not to confuse them with the oldsters.
And lets not forget the rebellious teenagers, who may call their
parents as they wish.
Peter Duncanson (BrE)
<roya...@gmail.com> wrote:
>I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
>first names?
>
>It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
>either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
>does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
>regions in which this practice is common?
>
>Thanks in advance....
There are individual special cases. I have a daughter by my first wife.
Following the divorce my first wife remarried and moved some distance
away. Daughter (pre-school age at the time) went with her. So as to
create cohesion of the new family she adopted the same surname as her
step-father and his three kids. After a few years it became convenient
for her to start calling me by my first name.
--
Peter Duncanson, UK
(in alt.usage.english)
Fred
"Berkeley Brett" <roya...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:804ff261-5a64-4925...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com...
>I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
>
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
> does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
> regions in which this practice is common?
>
> Thanks in advance....
>
My brother, sister and I, born in the 50s and 60s, called our parents by
their first names, but it was rare. I can't think of anyone else I knew who
did.
Peter Duncanson (BrE)
I should have said that Daughter calls her step-father Dad rather than
using his first name.
Fred
"Fred" <r...@parachute.net.nz> wrote in message
news:ic9b7o$olt$1...@news.eternal-september.org...
common after that.
Skitt
> "Berkeley Brett" wrote:
>> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
>> first names?
>>
>> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
>> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
>> does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
>> regions in which this practice is common?
>>
>> Thanks in advance....
>
> My brother, sister and I, born in the 50s and 60s, called our parents by
> their first names, but it was rare. I can't think of anyone else I knew who
> did.
My step-sons, whom I didn't meet until they were adults, call me by my
first name. I don't feel like their father in any way. They are my
friends.
--
Skitt (SF Bay Area)
http://come.to/skitt
Athel Cornish-Bowden
Nothing whatever to do with the thread, but I'll ask you (Skitt) a
question anyway. Next to us in the plane today there was someone
reading a magazine in Roumanian, so I leapt to what turned out to be an
unwarranted conclusion that he was Roumanian. When the time came to
fill in the landing papers I was surprised to see that he was
travelling on a Latvian passport, somewhat less surprised that he
talked with his travelling companion (whom I suppose was his wife) in
what sounded like Russian. So, two questions: does Latvian sound to an
untrained ear (which yours isn't, of course), like Russian? And would
you be surprised to see a Latvian reading a magazine in Roumanian?
--
athel
Skitt
> Nothing whatever to do with the thread, but I'll ask you (Skitt) a
> question anyway. Next to us in the plane today there was someone reading
> a magazine in Roumanian, so I leapt to what turned out to be an
> unwarranted conclusion that he was Roumanian. When the time came to fill
> in the landing papers I was surprised to see that he was travelling on a
> Latvian passport, somewhat less surprised that he talked with his
> travelling companion (whom I suppose was his wife) in what sounded like
There's that misused "whom" again. (*who* was his wife)
> Russian. So, two questions: does Latvian sound to an untrained ear
> (which yours isn't, of course), like Russian? And would you be surprised
> to see a Latvian reading a magazine in Roumanian?
It wouldn't be unusual for a Russian to live in Latvia and therefore
travel on a Latvian passport. As for the Romanian language, and whether
a Russian would know it, I have no idea.
Pierre Jelenc
> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
I just started reading Keith Richards's bio ("Life") where he calls his
mother "Doris" more often than "mum".
Pierre
--
Pierre Jelenc
The Gigometer www.gigometer.com
The NYC Beer Guide www.nycbeer.org
James Silverton
> "Fred" <r...@parachute.net.nz> wrote in message
> news:ic9b7o$olt$1...@news.eternal-september.org...
>>
>> "Berkeley Brett" <roya...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>> news:804ff261-5a64-4925...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com...
>>> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
>>> first names?
>>>
>>> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of
>>> calling either of my parents by their first names just seems
>>> WRONG!! But one does encounter it from time to time. I
>>> wonder if there are groups or regions in which this practice
>>> is common?
>>>
>>> Thanks in advance....
>>>
>> My brother, sister and I, born in the 50s and 60s, called our
>> parents by their first names, but it was rare. I can't think of
>> anyone else I knew who did.
>>
My kids, born in the 80's in the US, used Dad and Mom. Their cousins,
who we met frequently, used their parents' first names. It did not
usually lead to any awkwardness tho' we generally used "Your Mom" or
"Your Dad" when talking to the cousins about their parents and they
called me "Jim". The cousins now have children, as do my kids, and all
the kids use Mom and Dad and somehow I'm "Uncle Jim"
--
James Silverton
Potomac, Maryland
Email, with obvious alterations: not.jim.silverton.at.verizon.not
Roland Hutchinson
It was a "progressive child rearing" sort of thing in some circles, I
think. I was brought up to do it but discontinued the practice later in
childhood (due to peer pressure and wanting to be "normal", I suppose).
--
Roland Hutchinson
He calls himself "the Garden State's leading violist da gamba,"
... comparable to being ruler of an exceptionally small duchy.
--Newark (NJ) Star Ledger ( http://tinyurl.com/RolandIsNJ )
Richard Tobin
Berkeley Brett <roya...@gmail.com> wrote:
>I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
>first names?
C S Lewis, a snobbish conservative, has one of the characters in the
Narnia stories do this. Probably Eustace in "The Voyage of the Dawn
Treader". The young reader is intended to reject this "progressive"
behaviour.
-- Richard
Berkeley Brett
> On Sun, 21 Nov 2010 09:31:47 +1300, Fred wrote:
Yes, Mr. Hutchinson, I think "progressive" is a very good word in this
connection.
In addition, I would guess that -- as a group -- people who call their
parents by their first names are also more likely to self-identify as
Unitarians, Quakers, Humanists, or Buddhists (or, if Protestant, to be
members of one of the more liberal sects of Protestantism). Though I
wouldn't assert it, it wouldn't surprise me to find that they are also
a bit more politically liberal than average.
Indeed, a quick bit of web browsing suggests a connection with the
Quakers (also called "Friends," as in "Society of Friends," which is
the official name of the Quaker communion):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Testimony_of_Simplicity
[under the section, "Simplicity in Speech"]:
=== begin quoted text ===
Titles, such as Mr., Mrs., Miss, Dr., etc., are often avoided by many
Friends [Quakers]. Instead Friends tend to address each other by first
and last name with no title. In many Quaker communities children
address adults by either their first names, or first and last names
but with no title, and in many Quaker schools teachers are called by
their first names as well. It is conventional for Friends who do not
know each other well, who in non-Quaker circles would address each
other with a title, to use first name and last name together, rather
than to adopt the more familiar first name only. Friends also tend not
to use the appellation sir or madam to refer to someone of whom they
do not know the name, instead using the term Friend. In letter-
writing, where others might use the phrase Dear Sir or Madam, many
Quakers would instead write Dear Friend, and in such letters, rather
than finishing yours faithfully would finish either yours in truth or
yours in friendship. This practice is now considered more a part of
the Testimony of Equality than a part of the Testimony of
Simplicity....
=== end quoted text ===
Also at this very-slow-loading link:
=== begin quoted text ===
We bear corporate and individual responsibility for children within
the meeting, who learn from all their experiences with Friends.
Although the activities of children sometimes may conflict with the
need for silence in meeting for worship, we seek solutions that foster
growth in the Spirit for all. In recognition of each member's equality
in the Light, Quaker children and adults traditionally call each other
by first names or full names, avoiding titles, and regard each other
with mutual respect.
=== end quoted text ===
Interesting folk, Quakers. I'm not one myself, but I think one of the
finest people I have ever known was. He and his (now late) wife were
both physicians (he a cardiologist, she a pediatrician), and they
lived remarkably simple lives, with no trappings of wealth (as far as
I could tell).
Thank you all for these very interesting contributions. More
contributions are most certainly welcome.
--
Brett (in Berkeley, California, USA)
http://www.foreverfunds.org/
My plan to save the world: personal charitable endowments to which
anyone could contribute, as common as Facebook pages
Roland Hutchinson
> On Nov 20, 3:11 pm, Roland Hutchinson <my.spamt...@verizon.net> wrote:
>> On Sun, 21 Nov 2010 09:31:47 +1300, Fred wrote:
>> > "Berkeley Brett" <royal...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>> >news:804ff261-5a64-4925-85db-
e7a6cf...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com...
I'm familiar with that, and have known people who habitually speak using
the Friendly forms of address. As far as children addressing parents go,
I think it's mostly a matter of children addressing adults _other_ than
their parents as "John Smith" or "Betty Smith" rather than "Mr. Smith" or
"Miss/Mrs./Ms Smith".
Which is not to say that individual Quakers with the particular
"progressive child rearing" orientation I referred to won't from time to
time raise their children to call them by their first name. For what
it's worth, a direct or close Quaker influence in this respect on my
family is highly unlikely.
Nick
I'm almost certain you're right about which character and which book, as
I was about to post similarly.
--
Online waterways route planner | http://canalplan.eu
Plan trips, see photos, check facilities | http://canalplan.org.uk
Athel Cornish-Bowden
> Athel Cornish-Bowden wrote:
>
>> Nothing whatever to do with the thread, but I'll ask you (Skitt) a
>> question anyway. Next to us in the plane today there was someone reading
>> a magazine in Roumanian, so I leapt to what turned out to be an
>> unwarranted conclusion that he was Roumanian. When the time came to fill
>> in the landing papers I was surprised to see that he was travelling on a
>> Latvian passport, somewhat less surprised that he talked with his
>> travelling companion (whom I suppose was his wife) in what sounded like
>
> There's that misused "whom" again. (*who* was his wife)
Oh dear! Why did I write that? Not through a wish to emulate Jesus
("Whom say men that I am?"), but just carelessness or maybe a typo.
Anyway, I'm surprised. I make lots of typos, but that doesn't seem a
very likely one, unless maybe I was intending to enclose "I suppose"
between commas. You'll say that doesn't seem likely either, but the
comma on a French keyboard is where m is on most keyboards.
>
>> Russian. So, two questions: does Latvian sound to an untrained ear
>> (which yours isn't, of course), like Russian? And would you be surprised
>> to see a Latvian reading a magazine in Roumanian?
>
> It wouldn't be unusual for a Russian to live in Latvia and therefore
> travel on a Latvian passport.
Of course. In principle I knew that there were Russians living in all
of the Baltic republics, but for some reason that didn't occur to me at
that moment.
> As for the Romanian language, and whether a Russian would know it, I
> have no idea.
--
athel
Andrew B.
> rich...@cogsci.ed.ac.uk (Richard Tobin) writes:
> > In article <804ff261-5a64-4925-85db-e7a6cf7e7...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com>,
> > Berkeley Brett <royal...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
> >>I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> >>first names?
>
> > C S Lewis, a snobbish conservative, has one of the characters in the
> > Narnia stories do this. Probably Eustace in "The Voyage of the Dawn
> > Treader". The young reader is intended to reject this "progressive"
> > behaviour.
>
> I'm almost certain you're right about which character and which book, as
> I was about to post similarly.
I think it may have been all the pupils at Experiment House, though I
may be confusing it with them calling each other by surname ("Pole"
and "Scrubb").
Don Phillipson
news:804ff261-5a64-4925...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com...
>I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!!
Born in Scotland in 1942, my brother adopted this practice approx.
1980 after he had become a sort of Euro-professor (based at a Danish
university, traveling extensively.) His two siblings (living in Canada)
did not.
--
Don Phillipson
Carlsbad Springs
(Ottawa, Canada)
Bertel Lund Hansen
> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
Not many, but I have come across a few. The common style in
Denmark is "mor" and "far".
My grandchild, now 6 years old, has only been used to hear "mor",
"far" and "morfar" (that's me) when grown-ups talked about these
persons. At some time (around 4) he began to find it funny to ask
what our names were, and he of course was told. Later he had a
short period where he called "Gro" or "Uffe" when he wanted his
mother or father to answer, but it was just a shortlived fad.
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me,
Well, not exactly odd, is it? The parents have to be odd either
way. In one case they always call each other by firstname. This
leads to the children using first names also. In the other they
are odd when referring to their loved one as "mom" or "dad".
I chose and choose the latter oddness, but softens it by saying
"your mom" or "your dad" to the children.
> I wonder if there are groups or regions in which this practice is common?
I think that you can find neither groups nor regions in Denmark
where this is a custom. I think it's rare and random.
--
Bertel, Denmark
Katy Jennison
> ric...@cogsci.ed.ac.uk (Richard Tobin) writes:
>
>> In article<804ff261-5a64-4925...@j9g2000vbr.googlegroups.com>,
>> Berkeley Brett<roya...@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
>>> first names?
>>
>> C S Lewis, a snobbish conservative, has one of the characters in the
>> Narnia stories do this. Probably Eustace in "The Voyage of the Dawn
>> Treader". The young reader is intended to reject this "progressive"
>> behaviour.
>
> I'm almost certain you're right about which character and which book, as
> I was about to post similarly.
The parents' names were designed to reinforce the yuk factor: Harold and
Alberta.
--
Katy Jennison
John Varela
<roya...@gmail.com> wrote:
> I wonder if you've known many people who call their parents by their
> first names?
>
> It's always seemed an odd practice to me, and the thought of calling
> either of my parents by their first names just seems WRONG!! But one
> does encounter it from time to time. I wonder if there are groups or
> regions in which this practice is common?
I, born in 1935, always called my parents by their first names. My
parents died young so I never had the opportunity to ask them why
they had me call them (and my aunts and uncles) by their first
names; I suspect it was simply because they didn't bother to go to
the trouble of teaching me otherwise.
We taught our children to call us "Mom" and "Dad" by calling one
another that. As far as the children were concerned, those were our
names. Nowadays when the grandchildren are around we call one
another "Nana" and "Grandpa".
--
John Varela
Roland Hutchinson
> On 2010-11-20 23:33:28 +0100, Skitt <ski...@comcast.net> said:
>
>> Athel Cornish-Bowden wrote:
>>
>>> Nothing whatever to do with the thread, but I'll ask you (Skitt) a
>>> question anyway. Next to us in the plane today there was someone
>>> reading a magazine in Roumanian, so I leapt to what turned out to be
>>> an unwarranted conclusion that he was Roumanian. When the time came to
>>> fill in the landing papers I was surprised to see that he was
>>> travelling on a Latvian passport, somewhat less surprised that he
>>> talked with his travelling companion (whom I suppose was his wife) in
>>> what sounded like
>>
>> There's that misused "whom" again. (*who* was his wife)
>
> Oh dear! Why did I write that? Not through a wish to emulate Jesus
> ("Whom say men that I am?"), but just carelessness or maybe a typo.
> Anyway, I'm surprised. I make lots of typos, but that doesn't seem a
> very likely one, unless maybe I was intending to enclose "I suppose"
> between commas. You'll say that doesn't seem likely either, but the
> comma on a French keyboard is where m is on most keyboards.
The real question is "what would Jesus's copyeditor do?". If one is fond
of the sound of "whom" one might try "whom I supposed to be his wife",
which ought to be found blameless.
Mike Lyle
> On Sun, 21 Nov 2010 14:48:46 +0100, Athel Cornish-Bowden wrote:
>> Oh dear! Why did I write that? Not through a wish to emulate Jesus
>> ("Whom say men that I am?"), but just carelessness or maybe a typo.
>> Anyway, I'm surprised. I make lots of typos, but that doesn't seem a
>> very likely one, unless maybe I was intending to enclose "I suppose"
>> between commas. You'll say that doesn't seem likely either, but the
>> comma on a French keyboard is where m is on most keyboards.
>
> The real question is "what would Jesus's copyeditor do?". If one is
> fond of the sound of "whom" one might try "whom I supposed to be his
> wife", which ought to be found blameless.
Back when newspapers had "stone sub-editors", somebody like Ron Draney
could have made a very acceptable wisecrack out of that...m