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Kristen

unread,
Aug 22, 2002, 1:58:43 PM8/22/02
to
"Roy Biggins doesn't pay for sex, Roy Biggins Incorporated does!"

"Good God man, you led him right for us!"

"It's a pretty sad country when anyone can walk up to a counter and buy meat."

"I wonder how long trout live in trees."

"Lowell spent the entire last class watching an ant push a grain of salt across
his desk, and do you know what? I ENVIED HIM!"

I find that the more people I meet, the more I love and appreciate my dog.

suzanne

unread,
Aug 22, 2002, 11:49:33 PM8/22/02
to
"There's a door behind that guy?!?"


kkris...@aol.communist (Kristen) wrote in message news:<20020822135843...@mb-cc.aol.com>...

Ryan

unread,
Aug 23, 2002, 2:18:48 AM8/23/02
to
"Where did I read that? Oh, yeah, on the
back of a box of condoms."

"Over my dead body!"..."Isn't that what we're lookin' at?"

"Flying is...orgasmic"..."Why do you like flying Lowell?"
"Helen took my answer."

"If you want to a-fight me, fight me! If you want
to a-kill-a me, kill me! If you don't want
to do anything, that's just Jim Dandy!"

"Bringing Yoda to a strip club, yes!"

"I have a camcorder that shoots in the dark."....
"I got a gun that does the same thing."

"Let me put this in terms you'll understand...
blechchhchhchhhc!"

"He's the sorry lookin' sap sittin' over there
and why am I talkin' this way?"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 23, 2002, 5:07:02 PM8/23/02
to
"It's probably for another woman, the bastard"

"It's probably for himself, the bitch"


Buttercup \*^*^*/

Jane get me off this crazy thing!

Are we having fun yet? ;-) ;-(

Greg H.

unread,
Aug 23, 2002, 7:38:47 PM8/23/02
to
"I don't speak Italian!"

Greg

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 23, 2002, 10:17:05 PM8/23/02
to
"I'd be nowhere with out the Helenheads"

RLenseth

unread,
Aug 23, 2002, 10:56:19 PM8/23/02
to
"EMPTY!!! EMPTY!!!"


"Pee, Pee, Pee......
but there are no more peas on your plate"


"How many purple El Caminos are there on this Island"


"Waiting for a fare....... The light house!!! It's right freaking
there!!!!!!!!!!"


"Ahhhh, it's an island, she'll come to."


"My goat knows the bolwing score...."


"Joe... I'm writing down a number"


"You mean a meal called the feeding frenzy doesn't come with fries?!?"


-Mark12211

Greg H.

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 8:46:38 AM8/24/02
to
"Larson Hardware? Do you have any...do you have any idea why I called?"

Greg

Robert J. Muldoon

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 3:32:40 PM8/24/02
to
"Uhh... uhh.... Joe! Helen broke your vacuum!!"

--
Sincerely,
Robert J. Muldoon
o--(|8[#]

We're sorry, Bologna or Not is down again until we can relocate to a new
server. If you want to thank someone for the downtime, thank FOX's
lawyers....

S1.3 OFF+++ NED+++# ABE+++ FRI+++># CBG+++# BOB+++ ASS--- f++++ n--- pso
$+++ MG20, 7G09, 9F15, 2F13, 3F24, 3G01, 4F10, BABF07, AABF22----- M1984


Buttercup

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 7:12:19 PM8/24/02
to
"You Sank My Boat"

Nev121PP

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 9:46:27 PM8/24/02
to
Attention Sandpiper Passengers,

Nice thighs, Ms. Jenkins.

Where do I go when it finally dawns on me that my life sucks!

Obviously, someone doesn't know what "undercover" means.

How far can he get in heels?

Nev121PP

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 11:27:20 PM8/24/02
to
>"Pee, Pee, Pee......
>but there are no more peas on your plate"

"That's not what I meant"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 11:28:28 PM8/24/02
to
"Got any receipts?"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 11:29:45 PM8/24/02
to
"Please hold your carry on luggage by the hand and stow your children under the
seat"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 24, 2002, 11:30:30 PM8/24/02
to
"I don't know. Maybe Joe knows"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 12:15:56 AM8/25/02
to
"Euro Naked Land"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 1:08:59 AM8/25/02
to
"Get me the head of Marcia Brady"

Ryan

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 1:30:48 AM8/25/02
to
> "Pee, Pee, Pee......
>
> The light house!!!
>

Makes me think of:

"Hey, do you mind takin' a picture of
my pee-pee in front of the lighthouse?"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 9:21:53 AM8/25/02
to
"Bad things happen at the circus"

Nev121PP

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 12:57:59 PM8/25/02
to
Attention Sandpiper Passengers,

"Ooo, stud."

"Let's say me and you hit The Club Car, scope out the chickage."

"You've got what I lovingly called on George a 'big fat gut.'"

"Faulkners!"

Nev121PP

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 1:29:43 PM8/25/02
to
>scope out the chickage."
>

This made me laugh out loud, literally. (My kids think I've finally lost it!) I
had forgotten about that line! Classic Brian!

Lynne H

Kristen

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 5:35:33 PM8/25/02
to
"Get in the box, Joe."

"Can someone give me a hand? I've dropped all my fingers."

"Joe, can you please tell the nice man with the shotgun that I'm NOT a Libyan
terrorist?"

"She's LYING! I'm clumsy, I'm inexperienced, I don't even know where everything
is!"

"Helen's at the store!!!"

Greg H.

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 6:33:16 PM8/25/02
to
"That wasn't an arm. And if you touch it again you'll end up with a bloody
stump!" (Or something like that!)

Greg

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 25, 2002, 10:47:07 PM8/25/02
to
"You can still have children with one"

"Can you sleep at night with your shoes touching each other?"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 12:31:50 AM8/26/02
to
"Equipment failure? You didn't ask my brother about equipment failure."

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 1:27:50 PM8/26/02
to
"Why not can't you go?"

Kristen

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 2:22:55 PM8/26/02
to
>"Why not can't you go?"

Because married I am!

Kristen

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 2:51:46 PM8/26/02
to
"It's OK, Fay, I'm sure the police will have their own weapons."

"Lowell, why don't you just take the gun and shoot me yourself?"

"There IS a life outside that airport, people!"

"Don't pin this on me, Blondie, and I use the term loosely."

Artiscin

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 2:53:19 PM8/26/02
to
"You're not wearing a bra, are you?"

Cristy

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 7:27:23 PM8/26/02
to
"Hey, you watch what you say about this airport, mister"

"Anyone moves and the cabbie gets it"

Greg H.

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 8:00:50 PM8/26/02
to
"Antonio, we have to return to Nantucket. They have jurisdiction."

"But I have the gun!"

"Boston it is!!"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 10:22:22 PM8/26/02
to
>
>>"Why not can't you go?"
>
>Because married I am!

OK Lynne and Krissy! Refresh my memory, please?

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 10:23:00 PM8/26/02
to
"What possessed you to put your hand in the toilet"

mark

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 10:25:08 PM8/26/02
to
"The dog in the hallway coughing up a chicken bone".

mark

unread,
Aug 26, 2002, 10:29:30 PM8/26/02
to
"B is for the butter he would put on his waffails."

Kristen

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 12:27:31 AM8/27/02
to
>"Hey, you watch what you say about this airport, mister"
>
>"Anyone moves and the cabbie gets it"

LOL! That episode had a lot of great lines ;0)

"I'm officially a dead man."

"I got the gun! I got the gun!"

Kristen

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 12:28:44 AM8/27/02
to
>>>"Why not can't you go?"
>>
>>Because married I am!
>
>OK Lynne and Krissy! Refresh my memory, please?

That was from the strip club episode, which reminds me...

"He screwed you, Lou."
"He screwed me BLUE!"

Todd Mitchell

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 12:03:40 PM8/27/02
to
Lowell: "I wonder if Mr. T is related to Mr. Coffee?"

Roy: "I wonder if your mother is related to your father?"

Todd

"Boy, the 'Beaver Special'...it's like eating a really good friend." Theodore
Cleaver

Todd Mitchell

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 12:25:41 PM8/27/02
to
Thought of a few more women & Roy-related putdowns.

Roy: You know what I do when I have a problem with a woman?
Antonio: Deflate her?

Roy: I've never minded staying up all night because of a woman.
Helen: Well, you don't have a choice...if you dozed off, she'd escape.

Roy: You can say "please" for hours and it won't do you any good.
Brian: Ah, another page from the Roy Biggins Dating Manual.

Roy: Let's face it. Once you've been with Roy Biggins, you never want to be
with another man.
Antonio: Sounds about right.

Roy: If you'll excuse me, I've got to get ready for the big night.
Antonio: That's right, you're about to romance a woman...You'll want to shower,
shave, buy chloroform...

Nev121PP

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 12:58:06 PM8/27/02
to
Attention Sandpiper Passengers,

"You don't miss the Mud Bowl because you want to watch Wayne and Lois make
keys."

"Remember, we already gave them a gift -- we burned their house down."

"No frickin' way, cupcake."

Antonio: You gonna tap a keg?
Fay: Don't I always?

"Roy used to say, 'Morning, Lambert, getting any?' Now he says, 'Morning,
Lambert, getting any better?'"

Nev121PP

Nev121PP

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 1:04:11 PM8/27/02
to
Attention Sandpiper Passengers,

>Thought of a few more women & Roy-related putdowns. (or half a one)
>
But she's Mary Pat Lee, and he's ... Roy.

Nev121PP

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 1:41:07 PM8/27/02
to
>>Thought of a few more women & Roy-related putdowns. (or half a one)
>>

"Roy, as much as I'd like to tell my grandchildren how Biggons Canyon was
formed......"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 1:42:03 PM8/27/02
to
"Don't you ever call me Buttercup again"

Kristen

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 1:50:51 PM8/27/02
to
>"Don't you ever call me Buttercup again"
>

So what are we supposed to call you then? ;0) Butter? Cup? CupButter? Wings
Lover? Help me out here!

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 2:23:55 PM8/27/02
to
"If it's green, it's trouble. If it's fried, get double"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 2:27:05 PM8/27/02
to
I just gotta tell you guys that I have enjoyed this thread! Kudos to who ever
started it!

Lynne H

Robert J. Muldoon

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 3:19:13 PM8/27/02
to
"Did you know the Incans made their keys out of donkey bones?"

--
Sincerely,
Robert J. Muldoon
o--(|8[#]

"'Armageddon'' reportedly used the services of nine writers. Why did it need
any? The dialogue is either shouted one-liners or romantic drivel. "It's
gonna blow!'' is used so many times, I wonder if every single writer used it
once, and then sat back from his word processor with a contented smile on
his face, another day's work done."
--Roger Ebert

S1.3 OFF+++ NED+++# ABE+++ FRI+++># CBG+++# BOB+++ ASS--- f++++ n--- pso
$+++ MG20, 7G09, 9F15, 2F13, 3F24, 3G01, 4F10, BABF07, AABF22----- M1984


Greg H.

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 7:59:07 PM8/27/02
to
"But what am I going to do?"

(Helen points to something.)

"EEEEWWWWWW!!!!!"

Greg

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 9:39:31 PM8/27/02
to
>From: kkris...@aol.communist

>
>>"Don't you ever call me Buttercup again"
>>
>
>So what are we supposed to call you then? ;0) Butter? Cup? CupButter? Wings
>Lover? Help me out here!

Buttercup Daly!!! ;-)

Greg H.

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 10:32:02 PM8/27/02
to
>Buttercup Daly!!! ;-)
>
>
>Buttercup \*^*^*/

But what would Amy say!? ;)

Greg

Kristen

unread,
Aug 27, 2002, 11:10:31 PM8/27/02
to
>Buttercup Daly!!! ;-)

I should have known.

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 28, 2002, 12:07:17 AM8/28/02
to
>From: gre...@aol.comNOSPAM (Greg H.)

I couldn't figure out what you were saying to me! I kept looking at your post
and kept thinking "Who is Amy?" Then I remembered Amy is just his
wife........HeHe

grftnrd

unread,
Aug 28, 2002, 3:57:41 PM8/28/02
to
He got some bad magumbo happening.


You hairy pawed me, so Ethel rump the altitude Opie quit.

Todd Mitchell

unread,
Aug 28, 2002, 4:49:52 PM8/28/02
to
lhaz...@aol.com (LHAZ 61746) writes:

>I just gotta tell you guys that I have enjoyed this thread! Kudos to who ever
>started it!

Makes me wonder if Tom isn't sitting somewhere "editing" the quotes ;>

Todd

"The police aren't there to create disorder. The police are there to preserve
disorder." Richard Daley, 1968

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 28, 2002, 6:21:13 PM8/28/02
to
>From: nous...@aol.comatose (Todd Mitchell)

>Makes me wonder if Tom isn't sitting somewhere "editing" the quotes ;>
>
>Todd

I've made a few mistakes he would have pounced on!
;-)

Robert J. Muldoon

unread,
Aug 29, 2002, 1:15:07 AM8/29/02
to
"It's a seven..."

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 29, 2002, 4:26:37 PM8/29/02
to
"Cha-Ching! Cha-Ching!"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 30, 2002, 12:18:14 PM8/30/02
to
"If ifs and buts were candy and nuts we'd all have a wonderful Christmas"

Buttercup <one of my fav>

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Aug 30, 2002, 6:53:33 PM8/30/02
to
"Just stuff me in a pouch and FedEx me straight to hell"

"Gaze fondly upon today for tomorrow is bound to suck worse"

Buttercup

unread,
Aug 30, 2002, 7:17:18 PM8/30/02
to
"That's why they call it a steeple, Joe"

Mark12211

unread,
Aug 31, 2002, 11:48:43 PM8/31/02
to
"You're telling me that fries don't come with a meal called 'Feeding Frenzy' "

We just have Lobster.


Mark12211

unread,
Aug 31, 2002, 11:52:44 PM8/31/02
to
Joe, I'm writing down a number..

Greg H.

unread,
Sep 1, 2002, 8:26:07 AM9/1/02
to
>We just have Lobster.

Actually, it was "We only serve crab." I know, I was standing maybe 20-30 feet
from Helen & Davis Lynch when that line was spoken! ;)

Greg

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 1, 2002, 7:01:53 PM9/1/02
to
>Actually, it was "We only serve crab."

"I served her......craaaaabs."

Mark12211

unread,
Sep 1, 2002, 10:22:37 PM9/1/02
to
Thank you Greg,
I knew it didn't sound quite right!

-Mark S.

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:08:05 AM9/2/02
to
How could we forget this one?

"That was BOB'S donut!"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:17:47 AM9/2/02
to
"It was more of a mouselet"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:20:18 AM9/2/02
to
"We were spanking each other with meat then things just got weird"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:47:00 AM9/2/02
to
"My cab just got swallowed by a sinkhole"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:48:30 AM9/2/02
to
"All right, Ace! I know when I've been licked"

"So, last night is coming back to you"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 12:49:45 AM9/2/02
to
"My gums are receding"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 6:29:38 PM9/2/02
to
>"That was BOB'S donut!"
>

"How did I know? It didn't have his freakin name on it"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 6:30:39 PM9/2/02
to
"You wish you were over me. You wish you were all over me"

(my personal favorite)
Lynne H

Greg H.

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 7:28:04 PM9/2/02
to
"A priest, a rabbi, and a guy wearing lederhosen are travelling together."

Robert J. Muldoon

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 11:10:47 PM9/2/02
to
"Uhm... We're dressing!"

--
Sincerely,
Robert J. Muldoon
o--(|8[#]

S1.3 OFF+++ NED+++# ABE+++ FRI+++># CBG+++# BOB+++ ASS--- f++++ n--- pso

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 2, 2002, 11:31:56 PM9/2/02
to
"Side Bar"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 3, 2002, 8:51:00 AM9/3/02
to
"Teenine, weenie, yellow polka dot MARTINI"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 3, 2002, 8:51:32 AM9/3/02
to
"WE ALREADY GOT PLANS!"

Kristen

unread,
Sep 3, 2002, 4:36:40 PM9/3/02
to
"I can't concentrate with all these BATS flying around!"

"Pizza? We didn't order no stinking pizza! Did Watts send you? Talk to
me, Pizza Man!"

"It wasn't that I lost my boyfriend, I lost my best friend."

suzanne

unread,
Sep 3, 2002, 11:18:56 PM9/3/02
to
Kris...@yahoo.com (Kristen) wrote in message news:<9c9f0d03.02090...@posting.google.com>...

> "I can't concentrate with all these BATS flying around!"
>

OHMYGOSH! That was the funniest thing ever. "I call this (fill in
the blank)...WITH A DIET COLA!"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 7:21:56 AM9/4/02
to
"What kind of book?"

"A white one!"

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 2:10:55 PM9/4/02
to
"Read the book, read the book"

mark

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 5:36:13 PM9/4/02
to
"I got the gun ! I got the gun !"


Kristen

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 6:43:04 PM9/4/02
to
"I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die."
<But I got distracted and missed it.> Dave Foley, Kids in the Hall

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 10:16:24 PM9/4/02
to
><But I got distracted and missed it.> Dave Foley, Kids in the Hall
>

God, I love this show. So many funny skits. I love the guy that goes around
saying "I'm crushing your head" and he's mashing his finger and thumb together.

Lynne H

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 10:19:45 PM9/4/02
to
"Hey, it may not be sexy but it's safe"

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 4, 2002, 10:23:43 PM9/4/02
to
"You know what thy say about rat shoots? Two's company, three's a crossfire!"

Kristen

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 12:05:50 AM9/5/02
to
> "I got the gun ! I got the gun !"


C'mon, tell them I'm not the guy!

Kristen

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 8:29:44 AM9/5/02
to
> God, I love this show. So many funny skits. I love the guy that goes around
> saying "I'm crushing your head" and he's mashing his finger and thumb together.

I love Kids in the Hall. It's so funny. The Head Crusher guy is funny.
I also love Cabbage Head (I have a cabage for a head!), Gavin, and a
lot of the others. Dave Foley is my favorite.

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 12:01:53 PM9/5/02
to
"This summer, I'm a comin' out!"

TPPBfan

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 12:30:36 PM9/5/02
to
"Joe will you please tell the nice man with a gun I am not a Libyan terrorist."
e

Nev121PP

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 12:39:31 PM9/5/02
to
Attention Sandpiper Passengers,

"Eyes front, flyboy."

"All nude, all the time!" (from two shows)

"I'm not makin' bacon naked."

"They're beach-people."

Nev121PP

Kristen

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 2:02:01 PM9/5/02
to
"Use your imagination, man! Separate the men and the women and get
them singing 'Summer Loving' from Grease."

mark

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 5:11:32 PM9/5/02
to
Totally Nude Nudes

"Nev121PP" <nev1...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20020905123931...@mb-bg.aol.com...

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 7:31:12 PM9/5/02
to
Not perfection, but it goes something like this......

Lou (the screwed blue variety) to Brian:

"What are you a hippie or something?"

I loved it when he sat there and griped at Brain. How Steven could sit there
and not die laughing is a mystery.

"Why don't you get a haircut?"

"Now you I don't like!"

Bew~hahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Greg H.

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 8:23:00 PM9/5/02
to
"pa da ta da"

(It sounded something like that, the foreign woman who called Roy that. Then
on the way out of the terminal pointed to the rear end of a horse in a picture
on the wall & said that same line!)

Greg

LHAZ 61746

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 9:12:10 PM9/5/02
to
>I loved it when he sat there and griped at Brain. How Steven could sit there
>and not die laughing is a mystery.
>

I remember seeing on a blooper show this exact scene and Steven was cracking
up. They had to retake a few times.
Lynne H

Buttercup

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 10:52:32 PM9/5/02
to
>From: lhaz...@aol.com (LHAZ 61746)

>I remember seeing on a blooper show this exact scene and Steven was cracking
>up. They had to retake a few times.
>Lynne H

I think I'm gonna locate this episode and watch it this weekend!

Mark12211

unread,
Sep 5, 2002, 11:07:04 PM9/5/02
to
"Yup, that's right... Naked Land!"


-Mark

Kristen

unread,
Sep 6, 2002, 1:18:58 PM9/6/02
to
Wow, this thread has about 100 posts! Is that a new alt.tv.wings record?
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