favorites lines by Groundskeeper Willy

[JJ]

Heres some of my favorite lines in the Simpsons by Willy. I tried to
remember which episodes some are from.

The first thing I'm gonna do if I become mayor is kill the whole lot of you
and burn your town to Cinders.

If u need me you use that Shinnin of yours but dont coma a callin between 4
and 5. That's Willy's Time!
(Tree House of Horror episodes)

Bonjooour Ya Cheese Eatin Monkeys

Aww its Mr Burns... Kill It!!
(X Files parody Episode)

thats all for now

Peace

[Shwwwwwaaaaaaaaaannn!]

Not a line by Willy, but the sign on his door at the school:
"Keep OOoot"
LoL.

"I don't apologize to
ANYONE! I'm sorry Lisa, but
that's just the way I am...!!"

-Homer Simpson

_________________________________________
Shawn
e-mail: sdi...@gl.umbc.edu
http://members.blackplanet.com/therocksez
http://www.gl.umbc.edu/~sidggs1

[One of the GOOD AOL users]

I don't remember the exact quotes, but if anyone knows it, it's much
appreciated.

From "The Canine Mutiny:"

I ate your dog! I ate the way he stares, and some other stuff....

BART: Oh, you HATE him.

WILLY: And I ate his little mess too.....you heard me!!!

Hilarious!

The ONE and ONLY, Brandon Foster-Gray

CAPT. TENNILLE: Simpson, you're like the son I never had.
HOMER: And you're like the father I never visit.
---"Simpson Tide" episode, "The Simpsons," 1998

[ben-plot]

"Shwwwwwaaaaaaaaaannn!" wrote:
>
> Not a line by Willy, but the sign on his door at the school:
> "Keep OOoot"
>

and
keep off the grass
ACCH!

[bonfils]

Something like:

"There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman!"

... don't remember the episode, but it cracks me up every time

http://kim.bonfils.com
"One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that
one's work is terribly important."
Bertrand Russell

"JJ" <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote in message
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[¤°¯`°¤.¸¸¸.somebody..·'·.¸¸¸.·`°¤]

The noozle on da hoos!

"JJ" <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote in message
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[dave h.]

"willie hears ya. willie don't care."

[Alex Gilblom]

"Do not touch- Willy"
Good advice.

(Homer turns up the furnace.)

Alex

JJ <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote in message
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[Trabpukcip]

On Fri, 22 Jun 2001 18:10:08 GMT, "JJ" <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote:

'ach! Back to the loch with yew, nesseh"

[verbina]

"My mule wouldn't work in the mud, so i had to put seventeen bullets in
'er." From one of the Halloween eps.

verbina
I'm "a blouse wearn' bougle walker" or whatever the hell he says...

[Wiener]

"Just say the word and I'll <???> this hoe in his back!.... I can make it
look like suicide"

focusyn episode.

[Bartman]

"Trabpukcip" <Kloo...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:3b33e6ad...@news-server.optonline.net...

> On Fri, 22 Jun 2001 18:10:08 GMT, "JJ" <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote:
>
> 'ach! Back to the loch with yew, nesseh"
>

That's "Nessie", as in the name given to the loch ness.... oh, never
mind....

HILARIOUS freakin' line, nonetheless - the one I woulda posted otherwise.

[Jeffrey Newman]

JJ wrote:

Willie: "It's my 20th year, too"
Superintendent Chalmers: "The teacher's lounge is for teachers."

[The Rack]

"Jeffrey Newman" <jne...@aps-botal.com> wrote in message
news:3B37314E...@aps-botal.com...

::Walks out mumbling, spits on the floor::

--
And now, back to the wall.
-The inflammable Chadderack

Look! Velveeta® sticks to the ceiling.
_____________________________
>>| So long, Snuhperman! |
| Your secret identity |
| is safe with me! |
------------------------------

[ricardo saucedo]

Ya uuuused meh Skinnaah, Ya uuuuuuuuussssedd mehhhh.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ricardo Saucedo Omega Delta
Junior eta line #88
"Goony-Goo-Goo" - Aunt Bonnie
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Internet King]

"Don't touch Willy."
"Good advice."
Sincerely,
Little Girl

[e drain]

Best Willy quote ever:
If it were up to me, I'd let you go,
but the lads [indicating his fist] have quite a temper,
and they've been drinking all day.

Or something like that.

"JJ" <J...@JJ.JJ> wrote in message news:<4SLY6.1535$m2.1...@newsread2.prod.itd.earthlink.net>...

[drmusic]

"e drain" <edr...@firstam.com> wrote in message
news:757d6362.01062...@posting.google.com...

> Best Willy quote ever:
> If it were up to me, I'd let you go,
> but the lads [indicating his fist] have quite a temper,
> and they've been drinking all day.
>
> Or something like that.
>

Homer: "I'm the new exchange student from... Scotland."
Bart: "Dad, no!"
Willy: "What part of Scotland?"
Homer: "Uh, North... Kilt-town."
Willy: "Saints be praised! I'm from North Kilt-town too! Do ya know Angus
McLeod?"
Homer: "Wait a minute! There's no Angus McLeod in North Kilt-town! You're
not from Scotland at all!"

"I dinna cry when me own father was hung for stealing a pig. But I'll cry
now!"

And, finally... when Willy drinkes the tainted Garden Blast juice and sees
the beautiful woman...
"BOOGIE!!!"

Dr Music
P.S. Parking was ample.

[Daniel L. Dreibelbis]

"at least yer gettin' a decent burial, they threw me own father intae
the bog!"

"I'll KILL that Mr Burns! And WOUND that Mr. Smithers!"

"If I don't save the wee turtles, who will?
AAAGH! Save me from the wee turtles!"

"Hey Wolfie! Put down that hors d'oeurve, 'cause here comes the main
course!"

"Don't feel bad, Wolfie - I was a-wrestlin' wolves while ye were
still at yer mother's teat!"

"Ye've mastered a dead tongue, now let's see ya handle a live one!"

"By the time I'm through with you, they'll have tae do a
compost-mortem!"

"AAAGH! MY RETIREMENT GREASE!"

"I was conceived, born an' schooled on that billiard table!"

"There, pretty as a picture.
AAAGH! ZOMBIES!
There, pretty as a picture...."

"There's nary an animal alive that can outroon a greased Scotsman!":

[tom...@akula.com]

On Tue, 26 Jun 2001 20:47:36 -0400, "Daniel L. Dreibelbis"
<dre...@sympatico.ca> wrote:

> "at least yer gettin' a decent burial, they threw me own father intae
>the bog!"

Really funny, considering we met his father in the Loch Ness monster
episode.

>
> "Ye've mastered a dead tongue, now let's see ya handle a live one!"

Of course you forget..."MORIS...YOU DIE!"

Btw, wondering what the female version of Willie (from Shelbyville)
said...the accent was too thick, i couldnt catch it...

[Daniel L. Dreibelbis]

In article <3b393066...@news.akula.com>, tom...@akula.com wrote:

> On Tue, 26 Jun 2001 20:47:36 -0400, "Daniel L. Dreibelbis"
> <dre...@sympatico.ca> wrote:
>
> > "at least yer gettin' a decent burial, they threw me own father intae
> >the bog!"
>
> Really funny, considering we met his father in the Loch Ness monster
> episode.

and Willy mentioned that his father was "Hung fer stealin' a pig."
Gad, those Scotsmen are tough :)

NOT said by Willy, but funny nonetheless - there was a Simpsons comic
where Sideshow Bob teamed up with Kodos and Kang to take over the world.
In order to stop the spaceship, Lisa used a laser cannon to etch a
challenge to Willy into S.E.'s football field: "Scotsmen fight like wee
lassies!"

[Katijaikat]

It's "Willie, you complete me." (i.e. from "Jerry Maguire.")

Alee

S1.3 FRI*+++ RWG++ GIL-- MIL++ MAG++ TEE+ LIS* f+++ n+ $ 9F01,7F19,7G02,2F10,
2F22,1F02,4F04 F1980

[Trabpukcip]

On Sat, 23 Jun 2001 11:40:03 -0400, "Bartman" <bsha...@yahoo.com>
wrote:

yes, I know, I was trying to get his accent, I guess I didn't make it

[Alan Hamilton]

On Wed, 27 Jun 2001 01:03:12 GMT, tom...@akula.com wrote:

>Btw, wondering what the female version of Willie (from Shelbyville)
>said...the accent was too thick, i couldnt catch it...

"Slow down, you sidewalk-surfing cube gleamers!"

As for "cube gleaming", see http://us.imdb.com/Title?0097438
--
/
/ * / Alan Hamilton
* * al...@arizonaroads.com

[Katijaikat]

>>Btw, wondering what the female version of Willie (from Shelbyville)
>>said...the accent was too thick, i couldnt catch it...
>
>It's "Willie, you complete me." (i.e. from "Jerry Maguire.")

Whoops, sorry, this is what Fergie said in his Groovy Grove juice
hallucination. My mistake.

[tom...@akula.com]

kool...the writers knowldge of pop culture continues to amaze.

[tom...@akula.com]

Had to add 2 more:

"But first, a wee nip of courage"

"I 'ate your dog!"

[Sydney Assbasket]

"I warned ya! Didn't I warn ya! That colored chalk was forged by Lucifer
himself!"

"I also 'ate the mess he left on the floor...ya heard me!"
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[one]

"Me mule wouldnae walk in the mud, so I had t' put fourteen bullets in 'im!"

"Katijaikat" <katij...@aol.com> wrote in message
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[larry grenier]

"Willy hears ya,Willy don't care"

and

"I'll Kill Mr Burns and..uh wound that Smithers"