Capsule: [4F18] In Marge We Trust
Benjamin Robinson
the "Mr. Sparkle" video in it. As is usually the case, this capsule will also
be available from <http://www.snpp.com/episodes.html> in a day or two.
In Marge We Trust Written by Donick Cary
Directed by Steve Moore
==============================================================================
Production code: 4F18 Original Airdate on FOX: 27-Apr-97
Capsule revision A, 29-Sep-98
==============================================================================
> "TV Guide" Synopsis {jmb}
==============================================================================
After criticizing Reverend Lovejoy for being out of touch, Marge is put in
charge of counseling parishioners. Meanwhile, Homer finds his likeliness
is popular in Japan.
==============================================================================
> Title sequence
==============================================================================
Couch: Vend-A-Couch is there. Homer inserts a quarter and pushes
button. Nothing happens and he pounds saying, "D'oh!" {hl}
==============================================================================
> Did You Notice...
==============================================================================
... Snowball II trapped between the first and second floors?
Dale G. Abersold:
... this is the first episode written by Donick Cary?
... one of the stain-glass saints is "St. Donickus"? (Yes, Donick Cary
wrote a pretty good episode, but I thought sainthood was a posthumous
honor).
Jesse Burgheimer:
... Homer is also pretty bad at "chunking" memory, as noted by his phone
dialing skills?
... Homer is more fearful of his face on the box than he is of the Japanese
Mr. Sparkle commercial? (Which was indeed pretty frightening...)
Vince Chan:
... church starts before 8:45 AM?
... the clock in the library said 4:10?
... Homer dialed 19 numbers?
... the Leftorium had left handed umbrellas?
Mike Colgan:
... the Japanese in this episode is almost 100% accurate? (As most viewers
don't know Japanese, this seems trivial, but the Simpsons' production
team put some research into the dialogue.) [See "Comments" section for
more -- Ed.]
Nathan DeHoff:
... Moe apparently has his floor back? (The shot of Moe's didn't actually
show the floor, but that bar stool must have been standing on
something.)
... Akira said that Mr. Sparkle is "a magnet for food?" (Kinda like Homer)
... the "No Littering" sign at the dump?
Don Del Grande:
... apparently, the last Sunday church service is at 9:00?
... at the service, Birch Barlow is sitting next to Mrs. Wiggum, and Kirk
van Houten is sitting next to Milhouse?
... when Marge responded to Principal Skinner's problem, she made it sound
like she didn't know who he was?
... in the 1970s, Reverend Lovejoy had brown hair?
... the Hokkaido phone book is in English?
... Marge calls Reverend Lovejoy "Tim"?
... the sign in front of the church doesn't change for a while (a rarity
with this church)?
... "Old Springfield Library" is not only still functioning, it's open
seven days a week, and it's open from 8 AM until midnight on Sundays?
(What municipal buildings are open on Sunday mornings?)
... the English-speaking employee at the soap plant has a shirt that says
"Champions of Winning Superb!"?
... the zookeeper sounds like Moe?
Jason Hancock:
... the unopened Christmas present still under the rotted tree?
... the ornament on the rotted tree?
... Ned Flanders had thick glasses in the seventies? (Contrast that to the
King of the Hill episode that followed [on April 27, 1997, when this
episode was first aired], where Hank was shown as having thin glasses
during the time he and Peggy were dating.)
... OFF has spaghetti for dinner?
... the Lovejoys have a portable tape recorder in their kitchen?
... the Lovejoys have a phone in their basement?
... the Japanese dialogue is closed-captioned in Japanese?
Joe Klemm:
... the weasel talking on the cellular phone at Hollywood in the Itchy and
Scratchy short?
... Snowball II's is in between the downstairs ceiling and the upstairs
floor?
... the Japanese girl wearing blue doesn't have a line on her own in the
ad?
... Homer had Marge in his arms when in Lovejoy's car?
... Bart and Lisa skip school just to find Flanders?
Haynes Lee:
... Lionel Hutz in congregation (and first time too)?
... Dr. Hibbert is wearing his lab coat in church?
... the car with left-handed gear-shift Flanders sold to Burns in
Leftorium?
Ondre Lombard:
... even Marge sleeps in church?
... the face resembling Homer on the soap box has anime-eyes?
... younger Ned's voice sounds no different than it does now?
... Maggie has nothing to eat in the dinner scene?
... Homer knows how to say "hello" in Japanese? (Konnichiwa!)
Ryan Mead:
... that in "Deaf Comedy Blam," a dog near Scratchy looks like Poochie?
Dallas J. Pesola:
... Dr. Nick was in the 'Listen Lady' line?
... "Listen Lady" is one of Moe's catch lines, which he uses when talking
to Marge?
... gas is considered a discount at 1/10 cent less then normal price?
Brian Petersen:
... according to my DTMF decoder, Homer's long string of touch-tones when
calling Japan was: 9 6 5 7 1 5 3 6 1 8 9 6 5 7 1 5 3 6 1
Benjamin Robinson:
... Bart and Lisa must be quiet during an "Itchy & Scratchy" that's all
about loudness?
... the Reverend has a small praying hands statue on his bookshelf?
... in the flashback, the Reverend drives a VW Karmann-Ghia into town?
... while he's driving he's listening to "Jesus is Just Alright by Me," by
the Doobie Brothers?
... Reverend Lovejoy probably met Mrs. Lovejoy in Springfield, since she is
not with him when he arrives?
... as Homer dials Hokkaido, the librarian nervously runs off? (I expected
this to amount to something later, but it never did)
... today, Reverend Lovejoy's Karmann-Ghia is considerably more banged up?
Marge Starbrod-Simpson:
... the Leftorium is open despite the 4F07 incident?
==============================================================================
> Voice Credits
==============================================================================
- Starring
- Dan Castellaneta (Homer, Itchy {dga}, Sideshow Mel, St. Eleutherius
{dga}, St. Donickus {dga})
- Julie Kavner (Marge)
- Nancy Cartwright (Bart, Kearney)
- Yeardley Smith (Lisa)
- Hank Azaria (Moe, Akira, Librarian, St. Lucian {dga}, Donny {dga},
Zookeeper {dga})
- Harry Shearer (Nuclear countdown {dga}, Reverend Lovejoy, Principal
Skinner, Ned Flanders, Lenny, St. Bartholomew {dga}, Announcer
{dga}, Capt. McAllister)
- Special Guest Voices
- Sab Shimono (Mr. Sparkle executive {dga}, Mr. Sparkle {dga}, Reporter
{dga})
- Gedde Watanabe (Factory foreman {dga}, Factory worker {dga}, Japanese
tourist {dga})
- Frank Welker (Angry animals {dga})
- Also Starring
- Pamela Hayden (Dolph, Jimbo)
- Denise Kumagai (Dancing Woman #2 {dga})
- Tress MacNeille (Agnes Skinner)
- Karen Maruyama (Dancing Woman #2 {dga})
- Maggie Roswell (Maude Flanders, Helen Lovejoy)
==============================================================================
> Movie (and other) references
==============================================================================
- Def Comedy Jam {jk}
- parodied in title of Itchy and Scratchy cartoon
- French atom bomb testing {hl}
- the "Itchy & Scratchy" episode refers to this (see "Personal Comments
& Observations"
- "It's Flashbeagle Charlie Brown" {rm}
- scene where Homer falls asleep in church, tilts head and hitting chair
yelling "Damn It!" reminiscent to scene where Peppermint Patty falls
asleep in school, tilts her head and gets her nose stuck in binder
yelling "Ow!"
- Mr. Clean detergent
- a cleaning detergent with bald guy on it {hl}
- name "Mr. Sparkle" similar to "Mr. Clean" {bjr}
- "Conquest of the Planet Of The Apes" {djp}
- the title of Rev. Lovejoy's sermon refers to this 1972 movie, which
was the fourth in a series if five 'Ape' films
- "Time Out of Joint," by Philip K. Dick {ek}
- subplot similar, including finding an odd box at the dump
- ~ rifling through strange phone books for a number to call
- Homer's wondering if there was some secret significance to his face
mysteriously showing up on a box with strange markings
- "Church Chat" {ol}
- "Saturday Night Live" skit, featuring the "Church Lady," similar to
the "Listen Lady"
- "Help" {em}
- the scene where everyone is searching for Ned is very reminiscent of
The Beatles calling "Ringo!" in the movie
- Busch Gardens {djp}
- the Tampa Bay theme park also has a train that travels through
wildlife areas on the park grounds
- "The Charge of the Light Brigade" {hl}
- "Cannons [baboons in Lovejoy's version] to the left of me.
Cannons/baboons to the right of me"
==============================================================================
> Previous episode references
==============================================================================
- Homer wearing reading glasses {djp}
- [8F01] Reads "Reading Digest" in bed
- [9F09] Goes over the family finances
- [1F04] Assists a donuts fashion show
- [2F10] Studies marketing
- [2F13] Goes over the phone bill
- [3F07] Figures out Bart's punishment
- [3F11] Reads "The New Our Caddies Ourselves" in bed
- [3F12] Figures out his food order bill at IRS Burger
- [4F04] Reads "Hot Lotto Picks Weekly" in bed
- Monkey Attacks: (from the When Animals Attack(tm) list) {hl}
- [7F11], [8F20] "The Happy Sumo" {ol}
- [8F16] Rev. Lovejoy points an advice-seeker randomly to the Bible {ol}
- [9F01] Homer fights going to church in the morning {ol}
- [1F11] Organ monkey attacks teenage Homer's face
- [1F21] Sideshow Mel attacked by orchestra of monkeys
- [3F05] News report of a bunch of escaped infected confused and irritable
monkeys roaming the expressway
- [4F18] Baboons attack Ned Flanders in monkey pit (well, d'uh!)
- Ned bugs Rev. Lovejoy about minor things {ol}
- [7F08] After he throws Homer out his house
- [8F16] After Rod swears
- [3F01] After learning Bart, Lisa and Maggie haven't been baptized
- [7F08] Flanders phones Rev. Lovejoy concerning minor crises {hl}
- [7F11] the family goes to a Japanese restaurant {hl}
- [7F11], [8F20] The Happy Sumo restaurant {jh} {nd}
- [7F23] Flanders opens "Leftorium" {hl}
- [7F23] Jimbo, Dolph, and Kearney in the general area of the Leftorium {mss}
- [9F01] Homer doesn't want to go to church {jh}
- [9F05] Japanese couple at the zoo was looking at the slanty shanty {nd}
- [9F06] Homer keeps pumpkins way past Halloween [cf. The Christmas tree]
{hl}
- [2F13] Bart (cf. Homer) makes an international call {jh}
- [2F31] Japanese couple at the zoo bought a map from Bart in "A Star Is
Burns?" {nd}
- [3F01] Reverend Lovejoy indulges his hobby of model railroading {nd}
- [3F03] Kiddie zoo-train {hl}
- [3F16] Bart and Lisa watch I&S late at night {mss}
- [4F04] The Doobie Brothers are mentioned {jh}
==============================================================================
> Freeze frame fun
==============================================================================
- Lovejoy's sound effect buttons {hl}
- ambulance, bird, disco siren
- At Lovejoy's first sermon {jh}
Front row -- Seymour Skinner, Agnes Skinner, Lionel Hutz
Second row -- Princess Kashmir, Lenny, Lou the cop
Third row -- Kent Brockman, Dr. and Mrs. Hibbert, Maggie, Homer,
Marge, Bart, Lisa
Fourth row -- Mrs. Wiggum, Ralph Wiggum, Carl, Ruth Powers
Fifth row -- Mrs. Krabappel, Milhouse, Kirk Van Houten, Moe
- In line outside Marge's office {jh}
- Kirk Van Houten, Ruth Powers, Principal Skinner, Agnes Skinner, Dr. Nick
Riviera, Ms. Hoover, Larry
- At Lovejoy's second sermon {jh}
Front row -- Agnes Skinner, Seymour Skinner
Second row -- Moe, Mrs. Krabappel
Third row -- Dr. Hibbert and his children, Lenny
- Gathering outside Marge after second sermon {hl}
- Principal Skinner, Lenny, Agnes Skinner, Moe, Hans Moleman, Sideshow Mel,
Luanne Van Houten, Mrs. Hibbert, Lionel Hutz, bald guy
- At the last sermon {jh}
Front row -- Carl, Lenny, Maude Flanders
Second row -- Bart, Homer, Marge, Maggie, Lisa, Barney
Third row -- Moe, Principal Skinner, Agnes Skinner
Fourth row -- Milhouse and Kirk Van Houten, Chief Wiggum,
Mrs. Wiggum, Ralph Wiggum
- Church signs {bjr}
THE LISTEN LADY
IS IN
[later]
TODAY'S SERMON
CONQUEST OF THE
COUNTY OF THE APES
- Old Springfield Library's hours
SPRINGFIELD
LIBRARY
HOURS
8 - 12
7 DAYS
A WEEK
- Factory man's shirt {bjr}
CHAMPIONS OF
WINNING
SUPERB
- Signpost at the zoo. ("<" or ">" indicates direction of the arrow) {hl}
{bjr}
AARDVARK >
PAARK
< THE EMU
EXPERIENCE
HABITAT FOR >
HUGE MANATEES
BABOON COUNTY, USA >
< Elephant Cage
==============================================================================
> Animation, continuity, and other goofs
==============================================================================
+ Itchy & Scratchy, part of Krusty's show, airs 4 p.m. on Sundays, unless
Lisa and Bart are watching The Cartoon Network. {ol}
+ Itchy's laugh is wrong. {mss}
* Since when does Homer say "Damn it!" instead of "D'oh!"? [Variety is the
spice of life. Also, {nd} notes that the cursing would capture the
churchgoers' attention more quickly than just "D'oh!" -- Ed.] {djp}
+ In church was Kent Brockman, real name Kenny Brockelstein, who has been
seen wearing a c'hai (Hebrew for life). Granted, someone could have given
him the c'hai, and Brockelstein could just be a German name, but it's more
likely that this is just sloppy work. {bw}
- Helen's hair has always been gray, yet in the opening (when it's shown),
it's orange. {ddg}
* Why is Lisa, the environmentalist, so willing to go the dump? {nd}
+ Rev. Lovejoy can't have just two "U"'s for his marquee; he needed three for
the message "Every Sunday is Super Sunday" during [8F12]. {dj}
= Marge's speech at the beginning of Act 2 is out of sync. (It appears to
match what she said, so it doesn't seem to be a rewrite.) {ddg}
= The 1970s scene of Reverend Lovejoy with his trains is jerky, as if the
train was alternating between high and low speeds. {ddg}
+ If Lenny doesn't have a wife, whose legs was he shaving in "Marge on the
Lam?"
+ Carl (along with Homer, Moe, and Barney) was at Lenny's house in "Secrets
of a Successful Marriage." (Of course, Lenny might have told his guests
that his wife was out for the night.) {nd}
= While dialing the phone, it seemed as if Homer pressed two different
buttons that produced the same tone, and pressed the same button that
produced different tones. {rs}
* A long-distance call to Japan would begin with 011811. {ss}
* Homer makes his call at 4:10, but the library is only open from 8 a.m. to
12 p.m. [{ddg} thinks this "12" is "12 midnight" rather than "12 noon,"
though -- Ed.] {bjr}
* Cutting the cord to a phone's receiver shouldn't disconnect it. {ddg}
= At first, all of the bullies circle Ned clockwise, but then Dolph suddenly
goes counterclockwise. {ddg}
- The clock at the Leftorium has no hands. {jh}
==============================================================================
> Reviews
==============================================================================
Dale G. Abersold: Donick Cary's writing debut results in one of the best
episodes of the season, and the finest Marge-centric episode since "A
Streetcar Named Marge" [8F18]. The realistic plot, coupled with a more
surreal subplot, works excellently. There was no lack of laughs either:
the "Itchy & Scratchy" bit and the Japanese commercial were two of the
funniest sequences seen on the series this season. (A)
Joseph J. Barder: A mixed episode. The main story had its good moments (the
saints berating Lovejoy, for example) but the only really funny part of it
came at ending with the killer apes. The thing that really set this story
apart was the bizarre Homer subplot. It's a shame that they couldn't think
of a decent way to end it, so it just tapered off. (B-)
Rich Bunnell: Oh, man, this episode was HILARIOUS! I laughed at both the
Skinner moments ("I'm not principal of the line, mother!" "And you never
will be!") and, like so many people on the newsgroup, I laughed my head off
during the Mr. Sparkle commercial! "You will join me or die!" Yeah, the
Marge subplot was kinda boring, but it picked up once Flanders got into it.
(A+)
Jason Hancock: Another decent outing; the plot was a little slow at times,
but the subplot was pretty good even though it ended too soon. The
Japanese video and Homer's interrupting the boring church session were the
highlights in this episode. And Marge wasn't as bad as she has been in
recent episodes (3F11 and 3F24 come to mind). (B)
Joe Klemm: I loved the whole Japanese subplot, especially the ad itself. As
for the main plot, it had some clever moments. Hopefully, Ned and Lovejoy
will not suffer in their second trip to Baboon County USA unlike the first
trip. (A-)
Ricardo Lafaurie: This was a nice episode that went toward character
development of secondary characters, which I usually like, and accentuated
by -- guess -- MR. SPARKLE! Un no yoi besto washuuuu!!!! (A-)
Ondre Lombard: The story moves along in a very disjointed manner, with no
direction, and it falls flat by act three. So, in review, it begins with
Lovejoy showing apathy to parishioners, and ends with him saving Ned from
carnivorous baboons, which seemed added because Donick Cary didn't know how
to complete this doomed tale. As for the Homer plot, it was fortunately the
only remotely delightful part of this story, even though it in no way tied
in with the Marge-"plot." Seems like it belonged elsewhere. The Mr.
Sparkle ad, however, was classic. (C+)
Nick Orechwa: This episode did have its funny moments, including the Itchy
and Scratchy cartoon at the beginning and topped of with the Japanese video
that is sent to Homer. However, the whole Homer subplot, which did have
potential, fell flat and was almost brushed aside at the end. The scene
with Flanders at the end was more corny than funny. However, it was good
that a character like Rev. Lovejoy got the spotlight for a show. (B-)
Chris Pallotta: Yuck! What a stretch for a story-line (Both "Mr. Sparkle"
AND "In Marge We Trust"). This episode was as flat as a five-year-old can
of Coors Light. Could the ending be any less believable? Sheesh! At
least we know Ned still runs the Leftorium and Rev. Lovejoy's first name is
"Tim". After "Canine Mutiny", I guess the writers were bound for a DUD!
During Act 3 I was not ROTFL, as hoped. Instead I was RFRC (Reaching For
the Remote Control). (D)
Abhi Ray: I really liked this episode. It was probably the best Marge
episode since her subplot in "$pringfield". The plot was solid. The
premise at first seemed weak until Flanders entered the scene. The jokes
just seemed to come constantly. The episode ran very fluently as one of
the best this season. (A+)
Mark A. Richey: Unlike most people on this newsgroup, I liked most of the
Marge plot. However, it got ridiculous about the time they discovered Ned
in the baboon cage. The "Mr. Sparkle" ad was very funny ("Join me or
die!"), but the rest of the subplot fell flat. I should give this episode
a lower grade, but I still liked it. (B)
Lee Salem: Significant inclusion and seamless integration of many different
characters and storylines, with the brilliant, bizarre and surrealistic
"Mr. Sparkle" promotional video being the unquestioned highlight. I
laughed more during that segment that at all the SIMPSONS episodes this
season combined! (A+)
Yours Truly: The main plot of this show isn't bad, but it's overshadowed by a
funnier subplot. The endings of both plots could stand a little reworking,
though. On the plus side we do get a hilarious Funny Video (TM), and some
very good background on Reverend Lovejoy. About average as "Simpsons"
episodes go. (B)
AVERAGE GRADE: B+ (3.28) Std Dev.: 0.8061 (19 reviews computed)
==============================================================================
> Comments and other observations
==============================================================================
>> Now _that's_ timing
Dale G. Abersold: An episode about Marge volunteering at the local church
coincided with an important summit on volunteering in America, featuring
such respected American figures as Colin Powell and Jimmy ("history's
greatest monster") Carter.
>> Multiple Voices ...
- Dale G. Abersold provides bios for tonight's guest voices
Sab Shimono previously appeared in "One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish"
[7F11] as the apprentice sushi chef. His previous credits include "Gung
Ho" (both the film and short-lived television series), and the new release
"Paradise Road."
Gedde Watanabe also appeared in both film and television versions of "Gung
Ho". He is also remembered for his role as the exchange student in
"Sixteen Candles."
Karen Maruyama has had small character roles in many films, most notably
"Pulp Fiction" and "The American President."
Denice Kumagai has also had character roles in several films including
"Clear and Present Danger" and the seminal Vietnam film "Go Tell the
Spartans." She is best-known, however, for playing Quon-Le (Mac's wife) on
"Night Court."
>> Meta-reference corner
Benjamin Robinson: Marge says, "Nobody is watching us right now," and the
family looks around self-consciously. Of course, <we> are watching them
right now. (I didn't get this until the second viewing. Kudos to the
staff for having a not-immediately-obvious reference.)
>> Le Boom
Benjamin Robinson explains: Tonight's "Itchy & Scratchy" drew inspiration
from recent nuclear bomb testing conducted by the French in or near
Polynesia. After years of complying with a "gentleman's agreement" not to
test (I say that because I don't know if France signed the Nuclear Test Ban
Treaty), France abruptly reserved its decision and announced it would have
a test explosion of a nuclear device. The decision met with sharp
criticism by other governments and environmental groups such as Greenpeace,
which was very effective if the effect was to have France explode the bomb
right on schedule. To date [1997], there are no future tests planned, but
I don't believe the French ever came right out and said that there would be
no further testing.
>> In Rev. Lovejoy's tape collection ...
Dallas J. Pesola: The Doobie Brothers' second single from 1972-73. Cracked
the top 40 at #35. Used in Rev. Lovejoy's flashback scene. The version we
heard didn't sound like the original recording by the Doobies. It may have
been someone doing a cover.
>> The world's most economical sports car ...
Benjamin Robinson: ... it's just not the most powerful. At least, that's how
Volkswagen pitched its Karmann-Ghia. The popular little car was built
around a Beetle chassis and drive train, and was offered as a coupe as well
as the featured convertible. If Reverend Lovejoy bought his new in the
mid-Seventies, he got one of the last ones. VW discontinued the line after
the 1974 model year because it would cost too much to meet the new safety
and pollution control regulations. Notice that when Lovejoy and the gang
go looking for Ned, they all pile into the Karmann-Ghia. A real-life K-G
owner would laugh at this; it's barely a two-passenger car, let alone five.
The "rear seat," for example, is little more than an upholstered package
shelf, and anyone bigger than Maggie would have a tough time fitting.
Perhaps Marge can be persuaded to bring her station wagon for future
searches.
>> What was on that box, anyway?
Chris Browne has this answer: My reception had severe ghosting, but being a
student of Japanese, I was pleased to be able to read Sparkle's quote on
the Box. As far as I could tell it was "Hawai kuriin" or Hawaii Clean,
though I *may* have miss-read the characters for the first word, with the
double images and all (what does Hawaii have to do with it anyways?). If
anyone knows for sure, please post :)
I wish I had taped it, just to put the commercial away with the rest of my
collection of Japanese commercials :)
Justin Lee Massengale has suggests another possibility: I had a little
trouble with the speech balloon on the box: Seemed to me like it said
"HAWAA KURIIN !" I wonder of the first word was intended to say "PAWAA" (
= "Power clean!"). Another poster read "Hawaii", which doesn't really make
sense either, but come to think of it now I don't remember exactly what the
last letter of that word was.
>> Conversational Japanese
Justin Lee Massengale writes...: But I'm surprised that Homer knew the word
"Konnichiwa!" (= hello)
... and Bill Thacker responds: Remington Micro-screen shavers. Remember
Victor Kiam, the guy who made famous the line, "I liked the shaver so much,
I bought the company" ? Years ago he did commercials here in the US,
boasting that he was selling his shavers in Japan and showing clips of him
doing commercials, in Japanese. The Japanese ads started with
"Konnichiwa!"
Well, if *I* remember that, Homer *has* to remember it. :-) Either that
or he picked it up at the sushi restaurant.
Allyson Taylor also has an intriguing theory: Remember the episode where
Homer was the voice of Poochie? Homer was asked if he ever listened to how
funny his voice sounded on tape, to which he replied "No, I prefer to
listen to Cheap Trick". At the end of Cheap Trick's 'Heaven Tonight' CD,
about a minute after the last song ends, there's a little musical ending
(sounds like it was recorded live - or at least the crowd sounds were added
in for that effect). This end piece, which only lasts about 30 or 40
seconds has no lyrics, except the melodic shouting of, you guessed it,
"Konnichiwa". Thus, it shouldn't be a surprise that Homer would know...
>> That rake, er, phone scene...
Many people thought the scene where Homer calls the Mr. Sparkle factory was
overlong. Justin Massengale has a theorizes why this happened: as someone
else noted, it [the phone scene] was severely drawn out. About half way
through, I found myself saying, "Alright, this had better be REAALLLy
funny." Later on in the show I noticed Marge had a line which seemed
particularly badly lip synched. Sorry I don't remember exactly where this
was, but it was part of a longer line which started out with something like
"Oh, don't be silly. ... " followed by a longer declarative sentence.
The first part was quite out of synch but the rest was fine. Maybe the
phone scene was extended to fill in for time removed in a last-minute
dialogue change?
Dan Crow thinks there may have been a point to this scene, after all: As a
Brit living in California, this looked to me a lot like a skit on the awful
business of dialing abroad from the US. To phone back to Britain, I dial
1 800 9 19 19 19 011 44
*then* I dial the UK area code (four digits) *then* the UK phone number
(another six digits) for a total of 26 digits. I'd guess that it is
similar for dialing Japan, or anywhere else outside of the US.
>> Where is Springfield? (Part #837)
Marc Wasserman does a little sleuthing: Homer calls Japan during the day in
Springfield (after all, the library was open) and also during the day in
Japan (after all, the Mr. Sparkle factory was open, making the detergent,
and taking calls).
But that can't happen east of the Mississippi River. On Central Standard
Time, when it's 8 AM (the time a library could open) it's 10 PM in Tokyo,
and when it's 5PM (the time a library would probably close) it's 7 AM the
next day in Tokyo - Mr. Sparkle's factory wouldn't be open yet.
The only way to get crossover of times would be if Springfield is either on
Mountain or Pacific Standard Time - somewhere in the western United States.
[D. Sikula noted this assumes the factory isn't run around-the-clock --
Ed.]
>> Conversational Japanese, Part II
Dave Tallman and Kevin R. Gowen II go above and beyond the call of duty,
translating the Japanese in the commercial for us: Ok, now for an attempt
at transcribing the Japanese of the Mister Sparkle commercial. Note: I'm
a novice in Japanese, so this may have a lot of mistakes. I've also made a
literal translation that is even worse than the one in the commercial.
Aka ni taishite burei da! Yoguri ni yoberu!
I am disrespectful/rude to dirt! I can call out/remove dirt/filthiness!
Subtitle: I'm disrespectful to dirt!
Honki da yo!
I am indeed serious!
Subtitle: Can you see that I am serious?
Kore! Minna doke! Burabura shiteru tokoro ja nai!
Hey you! Everyone out of the way! This is no place for loafing!
Subtitle: Out of my way, all of you! This is no place for loafers!
Ore to issho ni nasu ka, shinu ki ka? [or possibly "shi no ki ka"]
Will you accomplish something with me, or will you die?
Subtitle: Join me or die! Can you do any less?
Aa! Isamashii houmu rogo desu ne?
Ah! It's a courageous home logo, isn't it?
Subtitle: What a brave corporate logo!
Misutaa Supaakoru no charengi ni ojimasu!
Let's respond to the challenge of Mr. Sparkle!
Subtitle: I accept the challenge of Mr. Sparkle!
Ausuma pauwa!
Awesome power!
Natsu yasumi no keikaku wa aru deshou?
What might you do with yourself for summer vacation?
Subtitle: What are your plans for summer vacation?
Misutaa Supaakoru! Un no yoo besuto washuuuuuu!
Mister Sparkle! Luck's best wash!
Subtitle: For lucky best wash, use Mr. Sparkle.
Hisashi T. Fujinaka adds: People were questioning whether the Mr. Sparkle
commercial was really Japanese. I can say for certain that it was really
BAD Japanese. You'd think they could at least find someone who spoke
Japanese as a native language and not someone who's just learning it. They
sounded like the American version of PINK LADY or something.
>> Fishbulb's true inspiration?
Brian Jaudon suggests where the writers may have gotten the idea for the
subplot: I remember Conan O'Brien saying in an interview once that Matt
Groening has a big collection of Simpsons merchandise from other countries.
He said that some of the things kind of look like mutated versions of the
characters, weird Bart Simpson dolls from Brazil and things like that.
>> Conversational Japanese, Part III
The Mr. Sparkle video brought up some memories for Vince Radford: Thanks to
anime I'm fluent at "Americanese". Americanese is nothing more than a
bunch of gibberish with distinct Japanese sounding overtones. In high
school I had everyone convinced that I knew true Japanese until a friend of
mine who is Japanese-American invited me to his house for dinner where he
promptly introduced his grandmother (who just "happened" to be visiting
that day and hardly knew any English) and encouraged me to "get to know"
her. Well I won't get into detail, but my little charade was painfully
exposed ... seeing that Mr. Sparkle bit brought back some funny memories.
>> The OTHER Ten Commandments
- Haynes Lee, with contributions from Jason Hancock, presents this Flanderized
version of the Ten Commandments
NED FLANDERS TEN COMMANDMENTS
1 Thou shalt not have any gods before Flanders'.
2 Thou shalt not make onto thee any graven images in the form of tacky
Fox merchandise.
3 Thou shalt not take the name of diddily-doodily Lord in vain.
4 Remember the Sabbath day by having a barbecue.
5 Only Maude and Ned are fit parents.
6 Thou shalt not kill people, animals, insects, or houseplants
7 Thou shalt not wear any woman's dresses other than your wife's.
8 Thou shalt not accept gifts without declaring them on your income tax.
9 Thou shalt not weasel out of jury duty.
10 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house, nor his wife, car, rec
room, motor home, leaf-blower, satellite dish, CD changer, camping
equipment, pool table, laser printer, Nintendo, tape deck, health plan,
videocam, riding lawnmower, barbecue, camera, beer fridge, beer selection,
trampoline, spice rack, cell phone, home entertainment system, VCR, CD
player, fishing rod, camp stove, sleeping bag, tool box, CD-ROM drive,
Pentium, rollerblades, running shoes, furniture, microwave oven, mountain
bike, skis, tennis racket, basketball hoop, power boat, yacht, television,
wardrobe, home gym, power tools, grandfather clock, CD collection, caller-
ID system, Internet provider (especially if thou art stuck with AOL), golf
clubs, gym membership, electric toothbrush, dental plan, frequent flyer
points, fax machine, Richard Simmons videotape collection, lawn furniture,
cable variety, china ware, china cabinet, stove, refrigerator, convection
oven, steak knives, rotor-rooter, septic tank, summer house, personal
hygiene, silverware, home renovations, lawn, flower bed, bird house, lawn
hammock, university education, graduate degrees, freemason membership,
clock radio, ham radio, water pump, video disc player, 8-track player, home
alarm system, double pane windows, halogen lamps, Rolex watch, summer home,
tax bracket, accountant, lawyer, hardwood flooring, plush carpets, pure-
bred dog, parrot, commode, tree house, tool shed, jungle gym, garden tools,
aquarium, luggage, back pack, exercise equipment, radial tires, treadmill,
humidifier, ice cream maker, snow blower, diehard battery, chainsaw, water
cooler, water heater, water filter system, humidifier, vacuum cleaner,
carpet sweeper, typewriter, clock radio, walk-in closet, coffee maker,
ironing board, wardrobe, lazy boy, coffee table, Stairmaster, walking
weights, china, silverware, jewelry, cake mixer, water sprinkler...
>> Miscellaneous, Etc.
The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this show is: E. PLURIBUS MARGE .
Don Del Grande provides the next two items: More proof this isn't a Roman
Catholic Church: the RC version of the Ten Commandments say that the only
two things "thou shalt not covet" are "thy NEIGHBOR'S wife" and "thy
neighbor's goods" - nothing about coveting your OWN wife.
"The Lord only asks for an hour a week!" "Well, in that case, he should
have made the week an hour longer!" Does this mean Homer is willing to go
to church the day Daylight Savings Time ends?
Joe Klemm gives us these next two items: The Man Without a Face is a 1993
film that marked the directorial debut of Mel Gibson. In it, he stars as a
disfigured man who helps a boy in learning for a military like school he is
going to.
Game Boy is a portable video game system by Nintendo. The system comes in
two sizes and six different colors. The games played on the system can be
played in black and white or, if you have a special device for the Super
Nintendo, in color.
Jason Hancock: The song playing in Lovejoy's car during the seventies is
"Jesus is Just All Right" by the Doobie Brothers.
==============================================================================
> Quotes and Scene Summary
==============================================================================
% Early Sunday morning finds Bart and Lisa in front of the television
% set, trying to watch "The Itchy & Scratchy Show" without waking Mom
% and Dad. After all, it would be a shame to miss:
%
% "Itchy & Scratchy in: Deaf Comedy Blam"
%
% Itchy, dressed as a doctor, walks into the hospital's ear trauma
% ward. Scratchy is a patient there, strapped to a bed. Itchy slaps
% his stethoscope on the cat, and pulls the sensor part of the
% instrument down the stairs, and out the front door of the hospital.
% He hops into a cab, and goes to the airport, where he catches a plane
% for the South Seas. Landing on an Island where the French are
% conducting nuclear weapon tests, Itchy points the sensor towards the
% blast site. Boom! The sound pulse from the explosion travels down
% the stethoscope's sound tube like a mouse down a python. It travels
% under the sea, past a Hollywood weasel chatting on his cell phone,
% over hill and dale, until it reaches Scratchy in the hospital. The
% sound literally goes to Scratchy's head, which swells to several times
% its normal size, and then pops like a balloon. A dog in the next bed
% shushes Scratchy's headless body. The End.
%
% Bart and Lisa laugh themselves silly at this (who wouldn't?), which
% wakes up Marge.
Marge: [sits upright, holding the covers to her neck]
Oh, my goodness! Kids! Homer! We're late for church.
[drops covers, revealing her church clothes]
I'm glad I dressed last night.
Homer: Oh, I'd love to go with you honey, but I got a lot of work to
do around the bed.
Marge: Homer, the Lord only asks for an hour a week.
Homer: Well in that case he should've made the week an hour longer.
[mumbles] Lousy God.
Marge: Mmmm.
-- "In Marge We Trust"
% The family does make it to church that day, only to discover that
% Rev. Lovejoy's speech on the nine tenants of constancy isn't quite as
% exciting as that morning's "Itchy & Scratchy." Homer nods off, knocks
% his head on the pew in front of him, and yells "Damn it!" The
% momentarily distracted Lovejoy loses his place, and elects to start
% his sermon over again. (Now, the rest of the congregation is probably
% thinking, "Damn it!") The Reverend's wise words allow the
% congregation to know the inner peace that can only come from being
% sound asleep. Lovejoy rouses the people with a sound effects
% generator that he had installed.
%
% The Simpsons return home, glad to finally be done with church for the
% day, and immediately change into their everyday clothes.
Marge: Hey, calm down. You're wrinkling your church clothes.
Homer: Who cares? This is the best part of the week.
Lisa: It's the longest possible time before more church!
Marge: Church shouldn't be a chore; it should help you in your
daily life.
Homer: It should but it doesn't. Now, who's going with Daddy to
the dump?
Bart + Lisa: Me! Me!
Marge: The dump?
Homer: We're going to get rid of the Christmas tree. It's
starting to turn brown.
[pan to the tree, which is now a brown, dry pile of
needles and kindling]
Wanna come with?
Marge: No, no, I don't feel like going to a trash pile today.
Homer: It's your life. We'll bring you back something nice.
[Homer and Bart carry out the remains of the tree]
-- "In Marge We Trust"
% Instead of the trash pile, Marge visits Rev. Lovejoy, who is putting
% up next Sunday's church sign.
Lovejoy: Can you believe it? They give you five "Q"s and only two
"U"s. What a world.
Marge: That's crazy.
Lovejoy: So, what's on your mind, Marge?
[cut to Lovejoy's office]
Marge: Sermons about constancy and provicitude [?] are all very well
and good, but the church could be doing so much more to reach
out to people.
Lovejoy: Oh, I don't see you volunteering to make things better.
Marge: Well, okay, I will volunteer.
Lovejoy: I wasn't prepared for that.
-- Be careful what you ask for, "In Marge We Trust"
% At the dump, Homer and Bart struggle to get the Christmas tree out
% the car window. They succeed, but strip all the needles off, so they
% carpet the floor of the car. With the chores out of the way, it's
% time for some fun.
Homer: Okay, who's up for some scrounging?
[begins to scrounge, coming up with a basketball, deflated
into a bowl-like shape]
Hey, here's a perfectly good basketball hat.
Lisa: I found a Malibu Stacey with no head.
[a rat pops up from Stacey's torso]
Aah! [drops Stacey]
Homer: [laughs. A raccoon emerges from the "basketball hat" and
attacks Homer]
Aah! Oh, my God! Help me Lisa!
-- When Animals Attack, "In Marge We Trust"
% Bart interrupts the fight, claiming to have found something
% unbelievable. He leads Homer and Lisa to a box half-buried in the
% muck. It has a cartoonish (relatively speaking) picture of Homer on
% it, along with strange writing.
Lisa: What the heck is that?
Bart: Maybe it's a box from the future.
Lisa: It looks Japanese.
Homer: What's going on? Wha -- why am I on a Japanese box?
[babbles worriedly]
-- Bart uncovers a mystery, "In Marge We Trust"
% Marge finishes up helping Lovejoy around the church.
Marge: All done. I swept the aisles and put all the collection
plates in the dishwasher. Oh -- and you wouldn't believe how
many dead pigeons there were in the organ.
Lovejoy: Marge, you are a real timesaver. Do you know, thanks to you,
that I discovered a form of shame that's gone unused for 700
years?
Marge: [impressed] Wow.
[phone rings, and Lovejoy answers on speakerphone]
Lovejoy: Lovejoy here.
Skinner: [on phone] Reverend, this is Principal Skinner. I'm facing
a crisis, and I didn't know to whom to turn.
Lovejoy: All right.
Skinner: Mother's gone too far -- she's put cardboard over her half of
the television. We rented "Man Without a Face" -- I didn't
even know we had a problem! What should I do?
Lovejoy: Well, maybe you should read your Bible.
Skinner: Um, any particular passage?
Lovejoy: Oh, it's all good.
-- Timeless advice, "In Marge We Trust"
% Marge isn't convinced the Reverend was all that helpful. Lovejoy
% brushes her off as being too idealistic. He tells Marge about what
% happened to him after he graduated from seminary school. "The Sixties
% were long over and people were once again ready to feel bad about
% themselves," he says.
%
% Flash back to the mid-Seventies, as a younger Reverend drives to his
% new church assignment. He barely has time to set up his office when
% he gets his first customer -- Ned Flanders.
Flanders: Reverend, I'm, uh, I'm afraid something terrible has
happened.
Lovejoy: Well, sit down and rap with me brother, that's what I'm here
for.
Flanders: [sits] I was talked into doing a dance called "The Bump,"
but my hip slipped and my ... my buttocks came into contact
with the ... buttocks of another young man.
Lovejoy: [pause] I ... see.
[voice-over] Then the calls began.
[dissolve to shot of the Reverend at the dinner table, on
the phone with Flanders]
Flanders: Well, I, I think I may be coveting my own wife.
[cut to shot of Reverend playing with a small train set]
I'm meek but, I could probably stand to be meeker.
[cut to shot of the Lovejoys in Paris]
I, I ... I think I may have swallowed a toothpick.
Lovejoy: Finally, I just stopped caring. Luckily, by then it was the
Eighties, and no one noticed.
-- Reverend Lovejoy's cautionary tale, "In Marge We Trust"
% Cut back to the present.
Marge: But you can't let a few bad experiences sour you on helping
people.
Lovejoy: Oh, sure I can.
[the phone rings]
[shudders] You handle it. [leaves]
Marge: Me? But I, I, wait I can't, I ... [picks up phone] Hello?
[the screen splits to reveal that Moe is on the other end]
Moe: Yeah, hi, I'm calling for Reverend Lovejoy. Who is this?
Marge: Oh, well, this is um, the uh ... The Listen Lady.
Moe: Yeah, well listen, lady, I got so many problems I, I don't
even know where to begin here.
Marge: Okay ... um, why don't you start from the top?
Moe: All righty. Uh, number one, I've lost the will to live.
Marge: Aw, that's ridiculous Moe. You've got lots to live for.
Moe: Really? That's not what Reverend Lovejoy's been telling me.
Wow, you're good, thanks. [hangs up]
[the phone rings. Moe has called back]
Moe: Hi, it's me again. I've got another problem. Uh, this one's
about my cat. [a cat yowls in the background] Yeah, shut
up, I'm asking her!
-- "In Marge We Trust"
% [End of Act One. Time: 7:16]
%
% At dinner, Homer questions Marge's decision to volunteer at the
% church. "Do you know," he argues, "that so-called volunteers don't
% even get paid." Marge explains the benefits of volunteering, but
% interrupts herself when she sees Homer staring at the mystery box.
Marge: Homer! Will you get that crazy box of off the dinner table?
It came from the dump.
Homer: But Marge, I'm obsessed with it. Where did it come from?
What is it a box of? How'd my face get on it?
Bart: Hey, if they got a picture of you, that means they can *see*
you. They're probably watching us right now.
Marge: That's ridiculous. Nobody is watching us right now.
[family stares nervously at the camera for a few seconds]
-- Nobody but the Neilsens, "In Marge We Trust"
% Homer's search for the truth takes him to The Happy Sumo restaurant.
Akira: [on phone] Hai ... Hai ... Hai ... Bye.
[hangs up and turns to Homer, Bart, Lisa]
Hi.
Homer: Akira, can you read this for me? [hands Akira the box]
Akira: [reading] Ah, yes. This is a product called, "Mr. Sparkle."
Very popular dish detergent. Hey, [points to box
illustration] he looks like you. Ah! Ah - ha! Ah! Ah!
Lisa: What's he saying?
Akira: He identifies himself as a magnet for foodstuffs. He boasts
that he will banish dirt to the land of wind and ghosts.
Lisa: Wow.
Akira: Yes, you have very lucky dishes, Mr. Simpson. This soap is
from the sacred forests of Hokkaido, renowned for its
countless soap factories.
Homer: [thoughtfully] Hokkaido, eh?
-- Yes, the land of sparkly clean forests, "In Marge We Trust"
% At the First Church of Springfield, the Listen Lady is in.
Lenny: See, all along I've been telling Carl I'm married to a beauty
queen. Now, he's coming over for dinner.
Marge: Oh, Lenny, I'm sure he'll like your wife no matter what she
looks like.
Lenny: No, no, no, no, no, it's worse than that. I don't even have
a wife. I just said I did to, you know, be a big shot.
Marge: Oh. Well, it's time to start telling the truth. Now, when I
have to tell my husband the truth, I cook him a big,
delicious dinner. By the time he's done eating, he's too
full and tired to care what I have to say.
Lenny: Wow, that's great! When Carl comes over, I'll stuff him
'till he don't know what's what.
[Lenny leaves the office. The camera tracks him to the hall,
where we see that quite a line of advice-seekers has formed]
Agnes: Seymour, I'm getting tired. Tell them we're going next.
Skinner: Well, I'm not principal of the line, mother.
Agnes: [accusingly] And you never will be.
-- Marge has her work cut out for her, "In Marge We Trust"
% Homer chases his lead to the old Springfield library. He asks the
% librarian for a Hokkaido, Japan, phone book, and for use of the phone.
% After assuring the unwary librarian that he will only make a local
% call, Homer stealthily (and lengthily) dials the Mr. Sparkle factory.
%
% Across the world, as a line of men soberly inspects detergent powder,
% a phone rings. The Mr. Sparkle factory foreman answers.
Foreman: [in Japanese] Hello?
Homer: Yes. This is Homer Simpson from America. Who may I say is
speaking to me?
Foreman: [in Japanese] He speaks English. You take it. [hands phone
to a worker]
Worker: [heavily accented] Hello, chief. Let's talk, why not?
Homer: Hello? Why am I Mr. Sparkle?
Worker: You like Mister Sparkle?
Homer: Well, I am Mr. Sparkle.
Worker: You have many question, Mr. Sparkle. I send you premium
-- answer question, hundred percent!
Homer: Hmmm!
-- "In Marge We Trust"
% As the Listen Lady, Marge's popularity in church soon outstrips the
% Reverend's. Soon, the Reverend can't even finish a sermon without
% being interrupted by people praising her name. After services, the
% parishioners file past Lovejoy and crowd around Marge, seeking her
% advice. For her part, Marge is now confident enough to treat Lovejoy
% as her secretary ("Tim, hold my calls"). Dejected, Lovejoy walks back
% into the church.
Lovejoy: Hmmm. I'm a shepherd without a flock. [looks
heavenward] What have I done to lose them?
St. Eleutherius:[comes to life in a stained glass window, surrounded
by a bright light]
The real question is: What have you done to keep
them?
Lovejoy: [gasps] St. Eleutherius of Nicomedia!
St. Eleutherius:That's my name, don't wear it out.
St. Bartholomew:To inspire men, you must be brave. I introduced
Christianity to Mongolia. It didn't take, but it was
worth a try.
St. Lucian: Tell us, good Reverend, what great deeds have you done
to inspire the hearts of men?
Lovejoy: Well, I had the vestibule recarpeted.
St. Donickus: I've appeared in over eight thousand visions, and
that's the lamest reply I've ever heard.
Lovejoy: Oh, now please, I, I thought saints were supposed to
be friendly.
St. Donickus: You ... you're just lucky God isn't here.
[the light fades, and the saints return to their
repose on the windows]
-- A disturbing vision, "In Marge We Trust"
% Marge gets a call from Mrs. Lovejoy, who is looking for a way to perk
% up her despondent husband. Probably just needs a day or two to
% himself, advises Marge, who is confident that the Reverend will bounce
% back. Mrs. Lovejoy doesn't seem convinced, but thanks Marge all the
% same. The camera cuts to Rev. Lovejoy sitting at the controls of his
% train set.
"Attention, HO-scale passengers. The dining car is closed. Root beer
is still available, but the cost is now six-fifty. If the passengers
will look to their right, you will see a sad man. That is all."
-- Reverend Lovejoy, "In Marge We Trust"
% We briefly interrupt this capsule to let you know that:
%
% *** The Mr. Sparkle video sequence begins here ***
%
% Homer and Bart watch TV. Lisa runs into the room, waving a package.
Lisa: Look, we got a package from the Mr. Sparkle company in Japan.
Homer: Ooh! [opens package, but only Styrofoam packing peanuts
spill out. He holds the package up to his eye. A videotape
tumbles out and bonks Homer in the face] Ow!
Lisa: It's a videotape.
Homer: Put it in! Put it in!
[Lisa does so. The video opens with a shot of a heavyset man
lounging in a sunken bathtub, the kind often seen in Japan.
He puts down the cigar long enough to address the camera]
Man: [heavily accented] Oh, hello, American investor. I see you
are interested in distributing Mr. Sparkle in you home
prefecture. You have chosen wisely. But please -- don't
believe me. Observe this commercial.
[begin commercial. A Japanese housewife wearing semi-
futuristic (in the "Jetsons" mode) clothing loads a
dishwasher. She pulls out a whistle, which summons Mr.
Sparkle. His head jumps off the Mr. Sparkle box, and floats
in mid-air. True to his name, bright sparkles fill the air]
Mr. Sparkle: [in Japanese; subtitled]
I'm disrespectful to dirt. Can you see that I am serious?
[having no arms or legs, Mr. Sparkle scrubs the dishes clean
by rubbing up and down with his head. The housewife is
delighted with her clean dinnerware. Mr. Sparkle flies into
the next room, where a baby is playing with a toy xylophone.
He amuses the child by bouncing on a few keys, and then flies
off. In the next scene, he appears deep beneath the ocean,
where a trio of dancing women hang out (where else?) on the
sea floor.]
Mr. Sparkle: Out of my way, all of you. This is no place for loafers!
Join me or die! Can you do any less?
Women: What a brave corporate logo! I accept the challenge of
Mr. Sparkle.
Woman #1: Awesome power!
[an inset box appears in the upper left corner of the screen,
showing a windup monkey toy banging a drum. Mr. Sparkle
demonstrates his awesome power by blowing up a strong wind of
heart-shaped symbols. The wind transforms the dancing women
into Sumo wrestlers. (I am not convinced this is an
improvement.)
Mr. Sparkle flies over a cow pasture. A reporter is
interviewing a two-headed cow.]
Reporter: What are your plans for summer vacation?
[the cow spots Mr. Sparkle floating overhead, and is so
surprised she shatters. Her four eyes hover in mid-air for a
second, then fall to the ground and blink.
Cut to a screen where Japanese slogans spiral to a vanishing
point at the center of the screen. Mr. Sparkle appears at
the center and heads toward the camera, rotating in the
opposite direction.]
Announcer: For lucky best wash, use Mr. Sparkle.
[Mr. Sparkle blinks.
Homer, Bart, and Lisa don't quite know what to make of this]
Bart: Bor-ring!
Homer: That didn't explain anything. All I know is that they stole
my face and used it for their stupid logo. There's no other
explanation.
Lisa: Wait, look!
[cut to the TV screen again]
Announcer: [in English]
Mr. Sparkle. A joint venture of Matsumura Fishworks [a
smiling fish appears on the left half of the screen] and
Tamaribuchi Heavy Manufacturing Concern
[a light bulb appears on the right half of the screen. The
two logos meld to form -- Mr. Sparkle!]
Lisa: Hey! It was all a coincidence.
Bart: Yep. There's your answer, fishbulb.
Homer: Well, it was a good ride while it lasted. Come on kids,
let's go home.
Bart: We are home.
Homer: That was fast.
-- Mystery solved -- 100 per cent! "In Marge We Trust"
%
% *** The Mr. Sparkle video sequence ends here ***
%
% You may return to the capsule now.
%
% At church, Marge consoles Cap'n McAllister on the loss of his
% GameBoy. Just as soon as he leaves, Ned Flanders calls. Jimbo,
% Dolph, and Kearney have been hanging around the Leftorium, and Ned is
% afraid "they could start slacking at any moment." Marge suggests Ned
% tell the boys to go away. Ned does so, but the advice backfires.
% Instead of leaving (as they were about to do on their own), they stare
% menacingly at Ned.
%
% Ned calls Marge back and tells her that things have gotten worse.
% They indeed have -- now the boys have chaired Ned, circling him on
% their mini-bikes like wolves circling a wounded deer. Marge tells Ned
% to "lay down the law," but Ned isn't up to the task. When he tries to
% get one of the boys to talk to Marge, they cut the phone line with a
% pair of scissors. Marge, thinking Ned has hung up and unaware of his
% situation, sits and waits for the next call. The water cooler burbles
% peacefully.
%
% The next morning, Mrs. Flanders visits Marge. Maude asks if Homer
% came home last night. Somewhat surprisingly, he did -- but the real
% shocker is that Ned didn't. Jimbo's gang pursued him all night, and
% the chase is still on as we speak.
%
% [End of Act Two. Time: 17:05]
%
% This time, it's the Listen Lady who needs some help.
Lovejoy: [walks into the room] Yes, Marge?
Marge: Reverend, I gave Ned Flanders some bad advice. Now he could
be in real trouble.
Lovejoy: [exasperated] What happened now? Did he swallow a paper
clip?
Marge: No, he's disappeared. Oh, I'm in way over my head. I mean,
where do the helpers turn when they need help?
[Lovejoy looks out the basement window. As if on cue, a
bright light streams through the glass and an organ can be
heard. The camera pulls back to reveal that Marge has
accidentally backed into the keyboard]
Marge: Eh? [stands up] Sorry.
-- "In Marge We Trust"
% Confident again, Lovejoy answers the phone when it rings. It's Ned,
% calling from the gas station where the gang stopped to refuel their
% mini-bikes. Marge asks where he is, but Ned can only read the price
% from the gas station sign -- $1.49 and eight-tenths. This is the clue
% Marge and Lovejoy needed: Ned is at Donny's Discount Gas.
%
% Lovejoy, Marge, Homer and the kids form a posse to find Flanders.
% Crowding into Lovejoy's tiny car, they ride out to Donny's.
Marge: Donny?
Donny: What?
Marge: Did you see a man being chased by some young hooligans?
Donny: I see lots of stuff.
Lisa: Did you see that?
Donny: Yes. [points to the zoo across the street]
-- Mr. Observant, "In Marge We Trust"
% At the zoo, Jimbo and the boys break off their pursuit.
Jimbo: Muh. Looks like we lost him.
Dolph: Yeah. Well, we proved our point. He'll think twice next
time he tries to defend his business.
Kearney: [yawns] I'm sleepy. Let's go to school.
[the trio motors off]
[camera pans to Flanders hiding in the bushes]
Flanders: They're leaving. The ordeal is over.
[a baboon jumps onto the bushes. Ned screams]
-- Spoke too soon, Ned, "In Marge We Trust"
% Reverend Lovejoy and the Simpsons search the zoo, calling out to Ned.
% A Japanese tourist couple sees Homer and immediately recognizes him as
% Mr. Sparkle. Homer takes time out to greet them in their own language
% ("Konnichiwa").
%
% Suddenly, Ned screams again. The family quickly pinpoints the sound
% as coming from Baboon County, which is the zoo's name for the baboon
% pit. They rush up to the rail and, sure enough, there's Ned,
% surrounded by a troop of angry baboons.
Flanders: Help, what do I do?
Lisa: Play dead!
Homer: No! Run around in circles!
Bart: No, act like a lion!
Marge: Swipe at the dominant male! Come on, Ned, knock that monkey
down!
-- Sure could use the Listen Lady at a time like this, "In Marge We
Trust"
% The zookeeper comes by, and is astonished to find that there's a man
% in the baboon area.
Marge: You've got to get him out of there.
Zookeeper: Jeez, I'd like to, but if they don't kill the intruder,
it's really bad for their society.
Bart: They're going to kill him?
Zookeeper: Eventually. First, they'll eat his skin.
[the family gasps in horror]
Homer: Ew.
-- Stuff they don't show on "National Geographic" specials, "In Marge
We Trust"
% Flanders is trapped in a tire swing set up for the baboons. One of
% the animals tries to sever the rope with a rock. Flanders yells out
% his last requests -- a fancy funeral with a big coffin and lots of
% jewels. As the baboons close in, a train whistle sounds. Reverend
% Lovejoy has commandeered a kiddie train that runs along a mountain in
% the baboon pit. He reaches down and grabs Ned just as the tire drops
% into the crowd below, and hauls him into the train. But they're not
% out of the woods yet. Two baboons jump onto the train.
"Say your prayers, you heathen baboon!"
-- Reverend Lovejoy, "In Marge We Trust"
% Lovejoy grabs a tree branch and swings around like a gymnast, using
% his momentum to kick the two baboons back into their yard. A third
% baboon leaps onto the train. Lovejoy uncouples the cars, and he and
% Flanders ride to safety while remainder of the train stays with the
% baboons.
Bart: Wow.
Lisa: Oh, those poor monkeys.
Marge: They started it.
-- Putting the blame where it belongs, "In Marge We Trust"
% Ned expresses his gratitude for Lovejoy's bold rescue.
Flanders: You saved me, Reverend. You really went above and beyond.
Thank you.
Lovejoy: Oh, don't thank me, thank Marge Simpson. She taught me that
there's more to being a minister than not caring about
people.
Flanders: [chuckles] Amen.
-- Yeah, there's also beating up monkeys, "In Marge We Trust"
% As the two men talk, the train heads back to Baboon County. The
% cries of the baboons suggests they know who's coming ...
%
% ... but it looks like Lovejoy will live to fight another day. For
% now, he has the Sunday church crowd enthralled with retelling of the
% rescue of Ned Flanders.
Lovejoy: Baboons to the left of me. Baboons to the right. The
speeding locomotive tore through a sea of inhuman fangs. A
pair of the great apes rose up at me but -- bam, bam! -- I
sent them flying like two hairy footballs. A third came
screaming at me ... [imitates hissing baboon]
[quietly resolved] ... and that's when I got mad.
Homer: Now, that's religion.
-- Amen, "In Marge We Trust"
% With a brief organ flourish, the episode fades to black.
%
% [End of Act Three. Time: 21:19]
==============================================================================
> Contributors
==============================================================================
{bjr} Benjamin Robinson
{bw} Bob Wells
{ddg} Don Del Grande
{dga} Dale G. Abersold
{dj} Darrel Jones
{djp} Dallas J. Pesola
{ek} Ellen Krejci
{em} Emily Marcroft
{hl} Haynes Lee
{jh} Jason Hancock
{jk} Joe Klemm
{mss} Marge Starbrod Simpson
{nd} Nathan DeHoff
{ol} Ondre Lombard
{rm} Ryan Mead
{rs} Russ Schumacher
{ss} Stephen Schenck
==============================================================================
> Legal Mumbo Jumbo
==============================================================================
This episode capsule is Copyright 1998 Benjamin Robinson. It is not to be
redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current
maintainer (caps...@snpp.com). All quoted material and episode summaries
remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox. All
other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors. The
transcript itself is Copyright 1998 Benjamin Robinson. This capsule has been
brought to you by Mr. Sparkle USA.
Thanks also to Dale G. Abersold for his help with the voice cast; I would have
been up a creek without it.
This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie,
Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are
today.
Many thanks to Dave Hall and Frederic Briere, who provided me with
alt.tv.simpsons archives when needed. This capsule wouldn't be nearly as
complete without their invaluable help.
--
Benjamin Robinson bj...@freenet.tlh.fl.us
This message may or may not contain sarcastic content; your burden to decide
"Today you will learn what truth is, and how to act on it."
-- Jesse Liberty
Brad Bizzolt
>Hisashi T. Fujinaka adds: People were questioning whether the Mr. Sparkle
> commercial was really Japanese. I can say for certain that it was really
> BAD Japanese. You'd think they could at least find someone who spoke
> Japanese as a native language and not someone who's just learning it. They
> sounded like the American version of PINK LADY or something.
Call me crazy, but I thought this was the point. Each language, when loosely
translated into English, tends to sound ridiculous to our ears. Japanese tends to
have this lofty, mock-philosophical "land of wind and ghosts" type of quality to it
when sentences are translated literally. I thought this was just a spoof of this
fact, and in usual "Simpsons" fashion took it overboard for the purpose of humour.
I also thought they pulled it off perfectly.
-----------------------------------------------
bizzolt(at)hotmail*com
The Fantastics - the noise 'n' roll revolution
http://rsl.net/bizz
-----------------------------------------------
Benjamin Robinson
Brad Bizzolt wrote:
>On Fri, 16 Oct 1998 22:34:01 GMT, bj...@freenet.tlh.fl.us (Benjamin Robinson) wrote:
>
>>Hisashi T. Fujinaka adds: People were questioning whether the Mr. Sparkle
>> commercial was really Japanese. I can say for certain that it was really
>> BAD Japanese.
>
>Call me crazy, but I thought this was the point. Each language, when loosely
>translated into English, tends to sound ridiculous to our ears.
I figured that Fujinaka was questioning the pronounciation or accenting of
the speaking voices in the commercial, much the way our friends in Australia
objected to the accents in "Bart vs. Austrailia (2F13)."
You correctly point out Japanese is infamous for producing stilted English
translations, so the "Mr. Sparkle" subtitles make sense. It makes me wonder
how English sounds once it's translated into Japanese.
R. Maitland Baxter
"HABITAT FOR HUGE MANATEES" is a pretty obvious pun on the Jimmy
Carter led house building for the homeless crusade "Habitat for
humanity".
". . . yeah, and maybe I'm a Chinese jet pilot."