Most quoted lines
G222harpo
later find yourself quoting in everyday life. For some reason, most of mine are
from Moranis. Here are some of mine
"beets...beets.....beets....beats me.
"ooooh Yasser, show us your lining,"
"San Francisky? So how did you get here. Didja drive or did ya flew?
"It's the drink that Otis drinks."
"Thanks for making the dip Alice."
DrMabuse
questions.... What's NOT so easy...is when someone asks YOU the questions,
like I'm going to ask you right now.... And what I want to ask is...are you
two hom--" (Floyd Robertson, being interviewed by Soren & Weiss)
"Real Juggernaut-like"
"Boss, how come you don't use no adverbs?"
"Unlike us, whose sexual exploits are known throughout Germany!"
"In order for this bill to become law, you must...SIGN THE BILL!" (Woo-oop,
woo-oop. Woo-oop, woo-oop.) - From Tip O'Neil's 3-D House of
Representatives
Wanda
"G222harpo" <g222...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20030627172058...@mb-m10.aol.com...
Lulu
"Oooooooh...daht's scary stuff, kids!"
Not that it's my favorite line, or that I don't find many other things
deserving; it's just that this is the one that somehow worked its way
into my lexicon.
-Lulu
Justin Pate
"G222harpo" <g222...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20030627172058...@mb-m10.aol.com...
Jim Bennie
Does doing 3-D stuff count? People always laugh.
I managed to fit the words "As a comic, in all seriousness" into a
something I did on the air the other day.
I guess "Oooh. We'll be right back" doesn't count, since Merv Griffin
actually used to say it. I was sorry that SCTV couldn't find someone
to do Arthur Treacher to put down Merv with a "Whatever you say, Merv"
or "My sides are still shaking with laughter, old prune" but it probably
didn't fit into the bits.
Jim
Trudi Marrapodi
[snip]
> I guess "Oooh. We'll be right back" doesn't count, since Merv Griffin
> actually used to say it.
[snip]
Why not? When you say it like Rick did...
That's one for me, as well as "I wanna bear your children!," "Ooh, that's
scary, kids!" and many others. And, as I've said before, my sisters and I
make frequent reference to the need for a Tardy Cannon when we're late, or
in the winter to our boots being Salt-Buddied.
--
Trudi
"Just like Pagliacci did..."--Smokey Robinson
____
Say NO to secret judging and corruption in skating --
support SkateFAIR!
http://www.skatefair.org
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> In article <bdjmbt$t67$1...@vcn.bc.ca>, jgbe...@vcn.bc.ca (Jim Bennie) wrote:
>
> [snip]
>
>
>>I guess "Oooh. We'll be right back" doesn't count, since Merv Griffin
>>actually used to say it.
>
>
> [snip]
>
> Why not? When you say it like Rick did...
I got one of my cousins when he was two years old to do the "oooh"
part. (He sounded less like Merv and more like Floyd the Barber.) Too
bad he was too young to say the "we'll be right back!" Interestingly
enough his father is a big SCTV fan (we usually greet each other with an
"ooo, scarrry!!!"), but I didn't know that at the time...
--
Chris "Bob" Odorjan - bob...@canada.com
BobNET - http://www.oxford.net/~bobnet/
Justin Pate
'er and off 'er!"
Justin Pate
"Justin Pate" <JP5...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:%ljLa.37238$xg5....@twister.austin.rr.com...
George Hiebert
"DrMabuse" <wsherr...@nospam.com> wrote in message
news:5U2La.4665$x4o....@news04.bloor.is.net.cable.rogers.com...
> "It's easy...so EASY...to ask the questions...when you're the one ASKING
the
> questions.... What's NOT so easy...is when someone asks YOU the
questions,
> like I'm going to ask you right now.... And what I want to ask is...are
you
> two hom--" (Floyd Robertson, being interviewed by Soren & Weiss)
> "Real Juggernaut-like"
"It's coming through, real translucent-like."
Or when doing something strenuous I quote the Larue line:
"The old heart's beating like a rabbit."
Pete in Calgary
Show" - Excercise, from SCTV episode 1.
It is some seriously funny S**t! "One and Two and One and..., Whooh!, I
gotta quit these things" (takes another drag).
Pete in Calgary
===================================================
Marty
up REEEAALL good!!!"
Terry Beatty or Wendi Lee
"Dat dat dah deet deet dee ...whatever the heck else you wanna put in
there."
"Oh thank you, Bing!"
"The Beatles?"
"You got to have your 3-D glasses...."
"That's right, Edna."
And I can't help singing the theme from "Mrs. Falbo's Tiny Town" any time I
drive past "Falbo Bros. Pizza" in Iowa City....
I'm also driven to pronounce "Fred Willard" Guy C. style.
Scary Terry
Uncle Buckle the Safety buffalo
Bill Needle: "Thanks for that great round of in-DIFFERENCE!!"
Sammy Maudlin had a couple: "Bobby, you're a busy man. We've been
trying to get you on this show for WEEKS!" and "Bobby, I think your
new film is Oscar bait!"
William B. to Lin Ye Tang: "I've seen all your kung fu movies. You're
a great actor. I want to see you play 'Hamlet'."
Gil Fisher: "But ol' Willie wouldn't listen, and he took us right out
into the weeds."
Floyd Robertson: "Here at Rolling Hills, they treat your alcoholism,
and they don't beat you or anything."
Grogan's response to Tim Ishimuni's panic: "I'm not crushing you,
Tim."
Andrea Martin: "That's 'buh-VAY'."
If I recognize the caller's number, I'll sometimes answer my phone
with, "Arpeggio here. Start talkin'."
And one of my all-time favorites: "Mmm, I love chicks, Boss ..."
Uncle Buckle
Uhhuh47300
weather...but I'm Floyd Robertson."
Tommy Shanks: "Hi, How ya doin', I'm doin' pretty good myself. Chipped a
tooth the other day...it really smarts...well, goodnight."
Dusty Towne: "Isn't that cute, isn't that true?"
Trace
Uhhuh47300
"God? I thought you said Bob!"
"He didn't...he couldn't...he didn't get a good enough lawyer."
"He was wearing a...beige leisure suit."
Trace
David Brodbeck
now and then I use : 'Dogs make 'em'
Whenever anyone asks me a computer question at work : 'Computers'
Whenever anyone uses the word 'function' 'Funnnnnnnnnnctional'
after i make a joke in a lecture, 'As a comic, in all seriousness'
whenever anyone has an old piece of hardware ''new Soviet mini cam'
At the beginning of class I often say 'So like, today's topic is like Heroin
eh' (assuming that is the topic of the class...)
Dave
---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.491 / Virus Database: 290 - Release Date: 18/06/2003
Matsmaniac
Justin Pate
there was an old camera from the fifties. I thought to myself "new Soviet
minicam", but I didn't say it because nobody would've gotten the reference.
"David Brodbeck" <brod...@swgc.mun.ca> wrote in message
news:bds5u8$h6f$1...@nntp-stjh-01-01.rogers.nf.net...
ken_s...@mindspring.com
hoser" is the #1 quoted SCTV line):
"A small, vice-like object"
"Shut up, you stupid little device for exposition" (often said when watching
TV)
the 3-D sound effect
"As a comic in all seriousness"
"Beer beer beer! Bed bed bed!" (oh, wait, that's the Simpsons, sorry)
"Fantasies suck."
"Klu Klux Klan meeting"
"Oh my god, he did say 'leopards'!"
I guess that's it.
Ken S.
"G222harpo" <g222...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:20030627172058...@mb-m10.aol.com...
Justin Pate
Uncle Buckle the Safety buffalo
> "No more dangerous than sticking a baby's head through a buzzsaw...."
My gosh, I almost forgot the line used by both Johnny La Rue and Mr.
Mambo: "Let's Mambo!!!"
Uncle Buckle
David Brodbeck
"David Brodbeck" <brod...@swgc.mun.ca> wrote in message
news:bds5u8$h6f$1...@nntp-stjh-01-01.rogers.nf.net...
>
> now and then I use : 'Dogs make 'em'
>
> Whenever anyone asks me a computer question at work : 'Computers'
>
> Whenever anyone uses the word 'function' 'Funnnnnnnnnnctional'
>
> after i make a joke in a lecture, 'As a comic, in all seriousness'
>
> whenever anyone has an old piece of hardware ''new Soviet mini cam'
>
> At the beginning of class I often say 'So like, today's topic is like
Heroin
> eh' (assuming that is the topic of the class...)
>
> Dave
>
I often say 'Damn It Jim' doing Dave's impression of DeForest Kelley
'The Beatles'
I have called video tapes 'vuudeyos' for the longest time, like Gerry Todd
Oh and I do the cocaine snorting sniffles like the director of that
Christmas movie when I teach about coke. I do it throughout the lecture.
Trudi Marrapodi
harvey...@hotmail.com (Uncle Buckle the Safety buffalo) wrote:
[snip]
> If I recognize the caller's number, I'll sometimes answer my phone
> with, "Arpeggio here. Start talkin'."
When someone starts telling me a long story, I may say "I'm listenin',
keep riffin'."
Proginoskes
> From the Farm Film Report "He blowed up! He blowed up good! He blowed
> up REEEAALL good!!!"
Also from the Farm Film Report (can't remember the exact wording): "We
know you're all farmers out there, because who else would be up at this
time of the morning?"
-- Christopher Heckman
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> From the Farm Film Report "He blowed up! He blowed up good! He blowed
> up REEEAALL good!!!"
http://megalyth.slipgate.org/html/oddities.html
Whatever you do, don't read this, especially the last panel on page
13. Otherwise your brain might blow up real good.
Lulu
> Mine (excluding all the GWN references - I assume universally "take off, you
> hoser" is the #1 quoted SCTV line):
>
>
> "A small, vice-like object"
> "Shut up, you stupid little device for exposition" (often said when watching
> TV)
YES! This one comes in very handy. :)
-Lulu
Dave Brodbeck
<ken_s...@mindspring.com> wrote in message
news:bdsepn$fn2$1...@slb6.atl.mindspring.net...
> Mine (excluding all the GWN references - I assume universally "take off,
you
> hoser" is the #1 quoted SCTV line):
>
>
> "A small, vice-like object"
When I was on Reach for the Top back in the mid 80s we used to do that all
the time, the Margaret Meehan, when we did not know answers but wanted to
kill time.
---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.495 / Virus Database: 294 - Release Date: 01/07/2003
eyir
line I use whenever my wife makes a comment that can be construed as a
personal observation on me. My son and I have another little exchange that
goes something like this:
Me: "That was a good film, but that one scene was a little 'diffuse.'
MS: (in his best Woody Tobias Jr. voice) "I've never heard you use that
word before ."
Me: "What do you mean? I use that word all the time."
MS: "Well, I've never heard you use it before."
Me: "Well, you're a liar."
MS: "You're the liar."
Me: "Pants on fire..." etc
Jim Bennie
<brod...@swgc.mun.ca> wrote:
> When I was on Reach for the Top back in the mid 80s we used to do that all
> the time, the Margaret Meehan, when we did not know answers but wanted to
> kill time.
What did Alex Trebel think? ;)
Jim
jane@virginia
over 1,000 of Kramer's best lines ("You've got three pints of Kramer
in ya", "It's a Festivus miracle!") and Kramer trivia (What is
Kramer's apartment number? 5B; What did Kramer put in a Cracker Jack
box? Toby's pinky toe, on ice. etc. etc) (You can check it out at
http://crash.ihug.co.nz/~mjmck/kramer/kramer1.html). Maybe someone
should start a similar site for SCTV lines... Because, you know, SOME
of us haven't SEEN SCTV in years and years, and we couldn't even TELL
you our favorite lines anymore (except, of course, "take off, you
hoser")!!
Lulu <Lu...@nospam.net> wrote in message news:<1iadt-...@sockmonkey.dyndns.org>...
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> A guy in New Zealand started a website called "Kramer Has Spoken" with
> over 1,000 of Kramer's best lines ("You've got three pints of Kramer
> in ya", "It's a Festivus miracle!") and Kramer trivia (What is
> Kramer's apartment number? 5B; What did Kramer put in a Cracker Jack
> box? Toby's pinky toe, on ice. etc. etc) (You can check it out at
> http://crash.ihug.co.nz/~mjmck/kramer/kramer1.html). Maybe someone
> should start a similar site for SCTV lines... Because, you know, SOME
> of us haven't SEEN SCTV in years and years, and we couldn't even TELL
> you our favorite lines anymore (except, of course, "take off, you
> hoser")!!
I've been thinking of transcribing some of the best bits from SCTV
for a while... maybe I'll throw something together for my next big site
update. I'm also looking into short video clips (now that I've had my
video capture card for almost a year), too.
Proginoskes
>
> I've been thinking of transcribing some of the best bits from SCTV
> for a while... maybe I'll throw something together for my next big site
> update. I'm also looking into short video clips (now that I've had my
> video capture card for almost a year), too.
I'll start things off ... [The numbers are season #, episode #, scene #,
according to the SCTV episode guide.]
-- Christopher Heckman
1-7#3b: Viewer Letters
Floyd Robertson (Joe Flahrety): And now it's time for (our) once-a-week
feature on SCTV News, News Views Letters. Now this is where we read
letters from you, our viewers, who objectively discuss the pros and
cons of our program. Now let's start off, all right, Earl?
Earl Camembert (Eugene Levy): Thanks, Floyd. Our first letter tonight comes
from Mrs. Emile Zola, who writes: "My family and I have been avid
watchers of SCTV news for many months now, primarily because of the
objectivity, discretion, and damn good journalistic sense of [slowing]
Floyd ... Robertson. [pause; FR looks smug.] His magnetic personality
and undying quest for the truth make him number one in my books. Three
cheers for Floyd."
FR: Hmmm, that was nice.
EC: Quite a compliment.
FR: Yeah. Here's one from Mr. D. R. Halsey of Centerville. Mr Halsey says:
"Dear Floyd, can't say enough about your fine news program, but one
thing really bothers me. Surely you can come up with someone better
than Earl Camembert. I can see how you might feel sorry for the guy,
but you can only carry pity so far. Now if it's a contract thing with
Earl, I'm a lawyer, and maybe I can help you out. I'd even waive my
usual fee if it would help get Earl off an otherwise fine newsprogram."
Earl?
EC: "(To) the president of SCTV Network: There are two sides of every coin,
and this seems to be your approach to your network newsteam, because
Earl Camembert comes up tails [pause] in presence, personality, and
delivery. He is a slug-"
FR: Slug?
EC: It says here "He is a slug jamming the efficiency of your news machine
and until you get rid of that", and then it goes on and on, uh,
"fumbling moron" ...
FR: [reading from his copy] "Empty-headed fumbling moron ..."
EC: Right. So that's one letter.
FR: You (wanna) finish it?
EC: No, I don't.
FR: (He) calls you a slug? [chuckles]
EC: I hope you die of rabies.
1-10#2: Sunrise Semester: Political Sciences 101 with Dr. Hammond
Greer.
[Dave Thomas throughout.]
Good morning and welcome to Political Sciences 101. I'm your instructor,
Dr. Hammond Greer. Today I'd like to talk to you about the future of the
scientific community.
Consider these facts, culled from a recent magazine article. Fact
number one: Ninety percent of the scientists who ever lived in history are
living today. Fact number two: One out of four people, in the Western
world, works for the scientific community. And yet this secret society
exists because each year -- and this is fact number three -- the government
gives the scientific community billions of dollars and millions of barrels
of oil.
Why? Why is this allowed to happen? When it is a known fact that
scientists are stealing from us?
Proof? You want proof? Weigh your car. Then compare that weight with
the weight listed in your owner's manual, and you'll find a discrepency of
fifty pounds. Fifty pounds times ten million new cars built in North America
every year ... That's five hundred million pounds of steel and glass!
What are they doing with all this stuff? What are they building?
They've got enough to build another planet, which is probably where they
live, off on some planet whipping around the universe, doing who knows what
to whom.
And then these scientists say they can't get us better mileage for our
cars. Well, we'd be getting great mileage on our cars, if they didn't steal
our gas... Yeah, they sneak into our houses at night with rubber hoses and
siphon gas out of our cars, and that's not all they're stealing from us.
My toaster is working slower than it ever did before. It's because the
scientists are stealing electricity, siphoning it out of my home, without
even asking me.
And I know I get more mail than I do, but the scientists steal it,
open it and read it, and if it's no good, THEN they send it to me ...
And how many times has someone phoned you and said they tried to get
in touch with you, but your line was busy, and you know you weren't on the
phone? 'Cause the scientists were using your phone, probably making long-
distance calls to that planet they live on.
And who do you think takes the top one-third of all cereal boxes?
Scientists! They love cereal!
They're stealing from us! They're robbing us blind! And what do they
give us back in return? Proper pH balance for our hair. What the hell is
proper pH balance, and who cares anyway? We've got to stop them before they
take over the world!
[pause, then calmer:] Tomorrow we'll be talking about the effect of
the gas combustion engine on the political structure of Taiwan.
... and a few one-liners (incomplete):
from 1-7#6: Commercial: Famous Philosopher School
Harold Ramis: Why, you could make as much as some poets!
from 1-14#5: Public Shoplifting Announcement: Shoplifting
Dave Thomas [announcer]: Shoplifting doesn't pay; it's easier to buy it.
So don't take it unless you're sure you can get away with it-- [punch]
Ugh, so don't shoplift under any circumstances; it's easier to pay for
it.
Trudi Marrapodi
<bob...@canada.com> wrote:
You know what I would love? Sound files that would play to signal various
things happening on a computer (error messages, incoming e-mail, etc.).
All from SCTV.
DrMabuse
transcript of Dave ranting about the scientists, and laugh until I cry.
(The part about the scientists stealing his mail, and only giving him the
junk, was hilarious!)
Wanda
Proginoskes
My favorite part is with the toaster ... It shows the rant is now coming
from an unexpected direction.
-- Christopher Heckman
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> Chris 'Bob' Odorjan <bob...@canada.com> wrote in message news:<vg9ba7q...@corp.supernews.com>...
>
>> I've been thinking of transcribing some of the best bits from SCTV
>>for a while... maybe I'll throw something together for my next big site
>>update. I'm also looking into short video clips (now that I've had my
>>video capture card for almost a year), too.
>
>
> I'll start things off ... [The numbers are season #, episode #, scene #,
> according to the SCTV episode guide.]
> -- Christopher Heckman
Thanks, eh! I'll add these to the site once I get working on it (my
main goal right now is to finish my personal site, I need a place to put
my resume and BobNET just doesn't seem appropriate)... if anyone else
wants to add something just post it here on alt.tv.sctv, I'll see it
eventually.
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> You know what I would love? Sound files that would play to signal various
> things happening on a computer (error messages, incoming e-mail, etc.).
> All from SCTV.
Maybe I'll work on an SCTV theme for Windows... anyone have any ideas
for what sounds to use for the various events that could happen?
Trudi Marrapodi
<bob...@canada.com> wrote:
> Trudi Marrapodi wrote:
> > You know what I would love? Sound files that would play to signal various
> > things happening on a computer (error messages, incoming e-mail, etc.).
> > All from SCTV.
>
> Maybe I'll work on an SCTV theme for Windows... anyone have any ideas
> for what sounds to use for the various events that could happen?
That's great, but while you're at it, could you please pretty please also
make one for the Mac? (she weeps)
Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> In article <vgclj8i...@corp.supernews.com>, Chris 'Bob' Odorjan
> <bob...@canada.com> wrote:
>> Maybe I'll work on an SCTV theme for Windows... anyone have any ideas
>>for what sounds to use for the various events that could happen?
>
>
> That's great, but while you're at it, could you please pretty please also
> make one for the Mac? (she weeps)
I'll try, but I don't have a Mac (I wish I did, I've wanted to play
with MacOS X for almost three years now). Actually, I'm not even sure
how to make one for Windows (but at least I have a WinXP system to
experiment on). What I'll probably end up doing is rip the sounds from
the show, then someone who actually knows how to make audio themes for
various operating systems can do that part...
jane@virginia
Jane
progi...@email.msn.com (Proginoskes) wrote in message news:<953c225f.03070...@posting.google.com>...
Adrain Barton
>This is fantastic! MORE! MORE!!
I don't remember that line. What is it from?
Trudi Marrapodi
<abar...@tampabay.rr.com> wrote:
Well, it's not really from this, but it would certainly fit in with Dr.
Cheryl Kinsey's advice on how to fake an orgasm.
Alicia Morgan
> >
> > And I can't help singing the theme from "Mrs. Falbo's Tiny Town" any
time I
> > drive past "Falbo Bros. Pizza" in Iowa City....
> >
"Looks like it's just you 'n' me, Mrs. Fab-lo"...(very large inmate to Mrs.
Falbo after prison break)
Mrs. Falbo singing "Tom Dooley" in the penitentiary...
'Do you like...dancing?"
"because at Beef 'N' Booze, we serve men - and men like beef!"
Alicia
Terry Beatty or Wendi Lee
Ubiquitous
wsherr...@nospam.com wrote:
>"It's easy...so EASY...to ask the questions...when you're the one ASKING the
> questions.... What's NOT so easy...is when someone asks YOU the questions,
> like I'm going to ask you right now.... And what I want to ask is...are you
> two hom--" (Floyd Robertson, being interviewed by Soren & Weiss)
>"Real Juggernaut-like"
>"Boss, how come you don't use no adverbs?"
>"Unlike us, whose sexual exploits are known throughout Germany!"
>"In order for this bill to become law, you must...SIGN THE BILL!" (Woo-oop,
> woo-oop. Woo-oop, woo-oop.) - From Tip O'Neil's 3-D House of
Representatives
"Ooohh! I'm shakin', I'm shakin'!!!"
Rocky the stupid Thug (The Days of the Week)
--
======================================================================
ISLAM: Winning the hearts and minds of the world, one bomb at a time.